Eben Pagan

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Eben W. Pagan, born December 5, 1971, in Brooklyn, New York City, also known by his pen name David DeAngelo^[1] is an American entrepreneur and author. He is the person behind a number of coaching programs dealing with several subjects, including "Double Your Dating" and "Get Altitude", among others, which are mostly marketed through the internet.

Contents 1 Background 2 Double Your Dating 2.1 Beliefs 2.2 Advice on attraction 2.3 Sub-communication and tension 2.4 Concepts 2.5 Criticism 3 References 4 See also

[edit] Background

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Early in his career, Pagan moved from the Pacific Northwest to continue his career as a real estate and mortgage broker in San Diego^[2], but first found real success in training real estate professionals how to use direct marketing to build sales leads. While building this business, Pagan set out to build his skills at meeting women through a number of avenues, including seeking the counsel of "naturals" (men who are naturally good with women) and students of women such as Hypnotica (Eric Von Sydow) Steve Piccus, Dave Riker, Rick H, and as a student of Ross Jeffries. During this period, DeAngelo went by the on-line nickname "Sisonpyh"^[3] (hypnosis spelled backwards, invoking the Neuro-linguistic programming (NLP) emphasis of Jeffries' teachings), and the offline handle "Brother Eben"^{[citation needed]}. For reasons which are in dispute, Pagan eventually disassociated himself from Jeffries and his teachings^{[citation needed]}, and on December 17, 2000 propounded his own schema in a seminal post on "Cliff's List", an internet dating newsletter.^[4]

In 2001, he started "Double Your Dating" as a one-man enterprise, run from the bedroom of his oceanside apartment in San Diego, in which he went by his pen name "David DeAngelo." It was at this time that he released his ebook Double Your Dating, an updated, expanded, and somewhat more conventional version of the mentioned seminal post. At the time, the Double Your Dating ebook was the sole product of the eponymous company, but since then, Pagan has released many products aimed at helping men with dating, with titles such as the Advanced Dating series, 77 Laws of Success With Women and Dating, Deep Inner Game, and Meeting Women Online. Pagan claimed in July 2007 that he employs two hundred people, all working remotely, and that his various product lines, which include Double Your Dating, Catch Him & Keep Him, Sasha Cagen (2008)</ref>), GetAltitude^[5], Fire Your Wedding Planner, Guru MasterMind and others, now gross close to $20 million annually in sales.^{[citation needed]}

Pagan runs an e-mail newsletter which is distributed to over 1 million subscribers.^[6]

[edit] Double Your Dating

Double Your Dating^[7] is a series of tutorials primarily advertised and sold through the internet.

The foundation for the Double Your Dating series is an ebook which claims to help men "demystify" much of what goes into attraction. Following the eBook, Pagan created further materials in the series, including a second ebook, as well as several ebooklets, seminars on DVDs and CDs covering various topics notably the Advanced and Mastery series, Meeting Women Online, Deep Inner Game with Paul Dobransky, M.D., Power Sexuality, On Being a Man, Cocky Comedy, Body Language, Man Transformation, Become Mr. Right, and his monthly Interviews with Dating Gurus subscription series.

[edit] Beliefs

Pagan argues that much human social behavior is related in some way to sexual reproduction, and that human mating habits do not differ significantly from other species.^{[citation needed]}

He suggests that social conditioning has programmed many modern men to develop involuntary habits that increase the failure rate of consistently attracting women or negate the attractive qualities that were designed to make women want them. "Pickup lines cause you to lose before you even begin" since they "don't usually elicit positive and rewardful responses; instead they breed negative reactions."^[8]

Pagan states in one of his advanced dating technique seminars that people can use his techniques to achieve a variety of goals, whether that goal is to have casual sex or to form more lasting relationships.^[9] David DeAngelo, as a member of the Seduction Community as a whole, often comes under fire by men and women who advocate "just being yourself", but is just as strongly defended by his proponents who argue that these opinions are based on ignorance of his actual material. In response to those that accuse Pagan of preaching manipulation, Pagan explains the irony that men who are unsuccessful with women are extremely manipulative themselves and that a secure male doesn't need to manipulate.

One of his beliefs is that being intellectual doesn't automatically equal success with women, but that such success can be acquired.^[10]

[edit] Advice on attraction

Pagan contends most men lack a deep understanding of women, and are thus at a loss to attract the ones they desire. As a result, men are forced to accept whoever selects them.

Pagan also believes that women are not as obsessed with the appearance of prospective mates as men are.^[11] Further, he contends that typical male courting gambits such as excessive flattery and gifting are seen by women as manipulative and insecure, and are thus ultimately unattractive.^[12] Instead, he contends that "attraction isn't a choice" -- women cannot be bribed into choosing to feel attraction. Rather, Pagan asserts that a woman will feel attraction automatically when she perceives a man to have certain characteristics such as confidence, lightheartedness, humor and independence, qualities he labels "cocky and funny" or "cocky funny."^[13]

Thus, while a typical man might hope to appeal to a desirable woman with obsequiousness and unbridled enthusiasm, carefully hiding any reservations he might have about her, a "cocky and funny" one would actually make his reservations abundantly clear from the outset, albeit flirtatiously and with humor.

[edit] Sub-communication and tension

According to Eben Pagan unresolved tension brings us closer together and makes us more physical (hence, more emotional). The idea he is conveying is that you cannot logically convince a woman to feel attraction for you. “Attraction is not a choice,” as he famously said. Rather, it is the building of unresolved tension in the moment coupled with the resulting anticipation it generates.

[edit] Concepts

• The Inner Wuss: a character trait of men developed through time that causes them to become submissive around women in order to get their approval. Pagan claims that women prefer men who are of higher status than they.^[14] (see also Nice guy).
• Cocky and funny: also known as 'cocky comedy' can be called flirting, this refers to combination of arrogance and humor. A humorous mock arrogance intended to communicate with intelligence and being 'a challenge'. Pagan points out that it is important to get the balance right, as just using 'cocky' "comes across as insecure, and comedy alone usually comes across as goofy and dumb." "Cocky and Funny" is often abbreviated as "C&F."^[15][16]
• Counterintuitive behavior: Pagan's description of some of his techniques to attract women, as they are the opposite of what most people think is attractive. Examples of such behavior include teasing a woman offhandedly and refusing to compliment her appearance. Can also be phrased as Don't behave in a boring or predictable way.^[17]
• Life changes: Pagan reiterates that the purpose of his programs is to effect a complete personality and lifestyle change among men that will help them achieve dating success.^[18]
• Emulate the Successful: Pagan encourages the following and emulation of those successful with women. He records interviews with those very successful in dating and releases them monthly as part of a subscription service.
• Sexual Communication: Pagan's principle of a 'secret mating language' or 'secret mating dance' that takes place between a man and a woman before they can mate.
• Reframing: Restructuring one's own beliefs set into a new one, such as changing self-doubt to positive thinking.

[edit] Criticism

It should be noted that Pagan has acknowledged that his work is a collection of suggestions and ideas and not to be taken as dogma. As evidenced in his Sexual Communication series, Pagan encourages students to evaluate his material "with your own minds."^{[citation needed]}

[edit] References

[edit] See also

• Dating Coach

v • d • e Pioneers of the seduction community Neil Strauss (Style)  · Mystery  · David DeAngelo  · Savoy  · Ross Jeffries  · Tyler Durden  · Juggler  · Lance Mason  · Zan Perrion

Persondata
NAME	Pagan, Eben
ALTERNATIVE NAMES	DeAngelo, David; Sisonyph
SHORT DESCRIPTION	Seduction guru; Motivational writer/speaker
DATE OF BIRTH
PLACE OF BIRTH
DATE OF DEATH
PLACE OF DEATH