|Family Guy episode|
|Episode no.||Season 3
|Directed by||Peter Shin|
|Written by||Dave Collard and Ken Goin|
|Original air date||November 8, 2001|
"Emission Impossible" is the 11th episode of the third season of Family Guy, that first aired November 8, 2001. The episode was originally scheduled to air on September 19, but was postponed due to the September 11 attacks, which made "A Fish out of Water" air instead.
The episode was written by Dave Collard and Ken Goin, directed by Peter Shin. Majel Barrett guest-starred as the voice of Stewie's microbionautical ship, and Wallace Shawn as Bertram, one of Stewie's potential brothers.
Quagmire babysits Meg, Chris, and Stewie while Peter accompanies Lois on a visit to her heavily pregnant (and newly single) younger sister, Carol Pewterschmidt. When Carol goes into labor, Peter drives her and Lois to the hospital (stopping to get drive-thru on the way). Carol's obstetrician, Dr. Hartman mistakenly jabs himself with several used needles and faints, but Peter and Lois successfully deliver Carol's baby, who turns out to be a boy (Peter initially mistakes the baby for a girl with penis). Reminded of the joyful experience of childbirth, Peter and Lois decide to have another baby, but when they tell their kids and Brian about it, Stewie begins fearing for his status as the youngest and resolves to prevent the conception of another baby.
Stewie attempts to interfere in a romantic moment by crying for attention. Foiled in this effort, he smears one of Peter's shirt collars with lipstick, but Lois catches him when he gets distracted by his own image in the mirror. In another attempt, he chloroforms Peter and utilizes a mechanical replica of him to insult Lois, but Chris and Meg accidentally knock him out the window, where Stewie jumps out in front of Cleveland, much to Cleveland's surprise. When a candlelit dinner threatens to lead to intimacy between his parents, Stewie shrinks himself and a spaceship-like vessel and enters Peter's body to destroy his sperm.
Once inside Stewie arrives at the testicles and immediately begins his assault. The sperm rally to resist him but Stewie, being the best of all Peter's seed, easily defeats them. The only one to offer meaningful resisitance is Bertram, who seems to be just as diabolically clever as Stewie himself. After a brief struggle and standoff, they are both knocked out. Stewie recovers first, and has Bertram at knifepoint, before he realizes that they have much in common, one thing being that they both want to kill Lois. Bertram claims to be the twinkle in Peter's eye. Additionally, with Bertram's help, he could accomplish many goals, including Lois' murder. They part on amicable terms, Stewie thinking it will be easy for Bertram to escape due to most of the sperm being killed, but Stewie has only moments before the ship reverts to its normal size. After a narrow escape through Peter's tear duct, Stewie steers the craft back to his room with no time to spare.
However, Peter and Lois start having second thoughts about wanting to have another baby, pointing out that it's been a while since the last time the two of them have had any time to themselves and how it's going to be almost impossible if they end up having another baby, and that Stewie alone needs so much attention. In the end, much to Stewie's chagrin, Peter and Lois ultimately decide against having another baby. Stewie frantically tries to get her and Peter to resume their plans ("You must receive his seed!"), but Peter retreats to the bathroom and masturbates with the assistance of a lingerie catalogue. Stewie, appalled at Bertram's apparent death, despairs until he notices a twinkle in Peter's eye, signifying that Bertram's still alive. Stewie's relief is only momentary as he realizes that his unborn brother may be a bit too clever.
||This article includes a list of references, but its sources remain unclear because it has insufficient inline citations. (February 2008)|
- S. Callaghan, "Emission Impossible". Family Guy: The Official Episode Guide Seasons 1–3. New York: HarperCollins, 2005. 152–155.
- Roffman, Deborah M. (2006-02-05). "What Does 'Boys Will Be Boys' Really Mean?". The Washington Post. p. B4.
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