|Family Guy episode|
|Episode no.||Season 3
|Directed by||Peter Shin|
|Written by||Dave Collard and Ken Goin|
|Original air date||November 8, 2001|
"Emission Impossible" is the 11th episode of the third season of Family Guy, that first aired November 8, 2001. The episode was originally scheduled to air on September 19, but was postponed due to the September 11 attacks, which made "A Fish out of Water" air instead.
The episode was written by Dave Collard and Ken Goin, directed by Peter Shin. Majel Barrett guest-starred as the voice of Stewie's microbionautical ship, and Wallace Shawn as Bertram, one of Stewie's potential brothers.
Quagmire babysits Meg, Chris, and Stewie while Peter accompanies Lois on a visit to her pregnant, newly single sister, Carol Pewterschmidt. When Carol goes into labor, Peter drives her to the hospital (stopping to get drive-thru on the way). Carol's obstetrician, Dr. Hartman mistakenly jabs himself with several used needles and faints, but Peter and Lois successfully deliver Carol's son (Peter mistakes it for a girl with a penis). Reminded of the experience of childbirth, Peter tells Lois that he wants to have another child. Lois gleefully tells the rest of the family, but Stewie feels threatened in his position as the youngest and resolves to prevent the conception of another sibling.
Stewie attempts to interfere in a romantic moment by crying for attention. Foiled in this effort, he smears one of Peter's shirt collars with lipstick but Lois catches him when he gets distracted by his own image in the mirror. In another attempt, he chloroforms Peter and utilizes a mechanical replica of him to insult Lois, but Chris and Meg accidentally knock him out the window, where Stewie jumps out in front of Cleveland, much to Cleveland's surprise. When a candlelit dinner threatens to lead to intimacy between his parents, Stewie shrinks himself and a spaceship-like vessel and enters Peter's body to destroy his sperm.
Once inside Stewie arrives at the testicles and immediately begins his assault. The sperm rally to resist him but Stewie, being the best of all Peter's seed, easily defeats them. The only one to offer meaningful resisitance is Bertram, who seems to be just as diabolically clever as Stewie himself. After a brief struggle and standoff, they are both knocked out. Stewie recovers first, and has Bertram at knifepoint, before he realizes that they have much in common, that they both want to kill Lois. Bertram claims to be the twinkle in Peter's eye. Additionally, with Bertram's help, he could accomplish many goals, including Lois' murder. They part on amicable terms, Stewie thinking it will be easy for Bertram to escape due to most of the sperm being killed, but Stewie has only moments before the ship reverts to its normal size. After a narrow escape through Peter's tear duct, Stewie steers the craft back to his room with no time to spare.
Peter and Lois, however, reconsider having another child due to financial difficulties, to Stewie's chagrin. He frantically tries to get her and Peter to resume their plans ("You must receive his seed!"), but Peter retreats to the bathroom and masturbates with the assistance of a lingerie catalogue. Stewie, appalled at Bertram's apparent death, despairs until he notices a twinkle in Peter's eye signifying that Bertram is still alive. His relief is only momentary as he realizes that his unborn brother may be too clever.
||This article includes a list of references, but its sources remain unclear because it has insufficient inline citations. (February 2008)|
- S. Callaghan, "Emission Impossible". Family Guy: The Official Episode Guide Seasons 1–3. New York: HarperCollins, 2005. 152–155.
- Roffman, Deborah M. (2006-02-05). "What Does 'Boys Will Be Boys' Really Mean?". The Washington Post. p. B4.
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