"Funky Cold Medina" is a hip hop song written by Young MC, Michael L. Ross and Matt Dike, and first performed by Tone Lōc. It was the second single from Lōc's debut album Lōc-ed After Dark (1989). The single was released on March 18, 1989, and rose to #3 on the Billboard Hot 100 the following month where it went platinum, selling over one million copies. It peaked on the UK Singles Chart at #13 in May of that year.
The song title refers to a fictional aphrodisiac, which is presented in the accompanying video as a steaming love potion. The lyrics tell the tale of Lōc's initially unsuccessful attempts to attract women at a bar. At the suggestion of another patron, he plies his intended with "that medina thing." He first tests the drink on his dog, who immediately latches onto his leg and attempts to arouse himself sexually, and subsequently experiences increased popularity among his canine contemporaries. Lōc's subsequent encounters with women also backfire on him; first he attracts a transsexual woman, and then a woman intent on marriage from the very first date (recounting his experiences on the game show Love Connection). In the end, Lōc concludes the concoction is simply not worth the trouble (and the video shows him regretfully emptying the bottle into a storm drain).
After the song became popular, several different cocktails were introduced bearing the name "Funky Cold Medina."