Super Hornio Brothers

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Not to be confused with Super Mario Bros. or Super Mario Bros. (film).
Super Hornio Brothers
Super Hornio Brothers II
SuperHornioBrothersVHSCovers.jpg
VHS covers to both editions of the film
Directed by Buck Adams
Produced by Midnight Video
Starring Buck Adams
T.T. Boy
Don Fernando
Ron Jeremy
Krysti Lynn
Chelsea Lynx
Kitty Yung
Release dates 1993
Running time 78 minutes (Super Hornio Brothers)
73 minutes (Super Hornio Bothers II)
Language English

Super Hornio Brothers and Super Hornio Brothers II are 1993 pornographic parodies of the Super Mario franchise, and they were released at the same time as the Super Mario Bros. film. Both films star Buck Adams, T.T. Boy, Ron Jeremy and Chelsea Lynx as the main characters. The films gained new interest after a write up by Something Awful sought out copies to review for its "Horrors of Pornography" column. Both parts were bought up by Nintendo to halt their distribution.

Plot[edit]

Super Hornio Brothers[edit]

Computer programmer Squeegie Hornio (Ron Jeremy) and his brother Ornio Hornio (T.T. Boy) are teleported into Squeegie's in-development computer game after a freak power overload. After regaining their bearings, Squeegie figures out and explains to Ornio that they are stuck in the black void of a computer monitor when it's turned off. A computer virus informs the brothers that King Pooper (Buck Adams) has kidnapped Princess Perlina (Chelsea Lynx). King Pooper intends on forcefully having Perlina help him travel to Earth with a tub full of semen energized by a special generator.

Squeegie and Ornio travel through the computer world, encountering other villains who attempt to delay them and hamper their efforts. Squeegie is temporarily separated from his brother in the process. Finding King Pooper's lair first, Squeegie attempts to free Princess Perlina, only to be found by King Pooper. Attempting to fight King Pooper alone, Squeegie is about to lose when Ornio reappears and shoves King Pooper into the tub, where he melts and dies. The brothers ask Princess Perlina to teleport them back to Earth, but Perlina only transports herself and Ornio back, leaving Squeegie behind in the cyberworld. Attempting to manipulate the generator to get back to the real world, Squeegie is confronted and appears to be captured by a revived King Pooper.

Super Hornio Brothers II[edit]

After a lengthy recap of the first installment, Princess Perlina and Ornio teleport back to Squeegie's office. Wondering where Squeegie is, Ornio is distracted by Princess Perlina offering sex as a reward for saving her from King Pooper. After sexual intercourse, Ornio asks Perlina to bring Squeegie back to the real world. The teleportation goes horribly wrong; Perlina teleports both Squeegie and King Pooper just as King Pooper confronts Squeegie at the generator seen at the end of Super Hornio Brothers. King Pooper escapes, and he begins to enact his ultimate goal, bluntly explained by Perlina to the Hornio Brothers as to "procreate and create more King Pooper offspring." While King Pooper hires a prostitute to start his plan, Squeegie theorizes that the generator is the key to King Pooper's scheme and draws up plans to destroy it.

Mimicking what they did the first time around, Squeegie and Ornio teleport back into the computer. Guided by the computer virus, Ornio distracts a villainess, which allows Squeegie and the computer virus to go back to King Pooper's lair. Squeegie comes up with a plan to thwart King Pooper by having the computer virus "overload" the generator and knock it out. The computer virus rubs his body against the machine, causing it to overload. Squeegie explains to Ornio and Princess Perlina back in the real world that by overloading the generator, King Pooper is now in "a state of limbo" and won't cause any more trouble. Ecstatic, Princess Perlina embraces and hugs Ornio while ignoring Squeegie. A spurned Squeegie turns to the camera and says that he expected the film to end this way.

Cast[edit]

Super Hornio Brothers[edit]

Super Hornio Brothers II[edit]

  • Buck Adams – King Pooper
  • T.T. Boy – Ornio Hornio
  • Don Fernando - Bob
  • Ron Jeremy – Squeegie Hornio
  • Krysti Lynn – Spider Woman
  • Chelsea Lynx – Princes Perlina
  • Vimal Depala - Raj Hornio

Production[edit]

Initially, porn studio Sin City Entertainment funded the project, but they dropped out, leaving Buck Adams to seek the help of Midnight Video to finish the film. In return for funding, Adams was asked by Midnight Video to trim the 37-page script, split the film into two and cut the filming schedule from three days to two.[1][2]

Initially thought of as a rumor,[3][4] Ron Jeremy's official site notes that while they would love to make both films available alongside the massive library they have, Nintendo bought up the rights to both films to halt distribution indefinitely.[5]

Something Awful[edit]

In July 2008, Zack Parsons of Something Awful (SA) was tipped off by a forum post claiming that there was a pornographic parody of Super Mario Bros. Initially dismissed as fake, upon being confirmed as real, Something Awful attempted to buy the film through retailers with no luck. In August 2008, Parsons issued a challenge for Something Awful's "Horrors of Pornography" section of the site to obtain a copy of the film to review.[3] After numerous false leads, ranging from SA users giving a sex only CD-ROM with none of the dialogue scenes to people remembering they once had it but ultimately having some other porno they mistook for Super Hornio Brothers to one seller wanting $300 for the coveted copy, an anonymous benefactor gave Something Awful a DVD-rip of Super Hornio Brothers 2 for SA to review in June 2009. Super Hornio Brothers 2 contained a recap of Super Hornio Brothers, which was sufficient enough for Something Awful to play catch-up with the first film.[2]

The Something Awful article is often the basis of other sites "finding out" about and making articles about the porn parody.[4][6][7][8] In addition, the films are claimed to have both existed and not existed by many people.[1][2][3]

In 2014, a Something Awful forum user claimed to have purchased a copy of Super Hornio Brothers.[9]

Reception[edit]

In the "Horrors of Pornography" column, Something Awful's Zack Parsons, reviewing Super Hornio Brothers 2, gave it a −33 rating, and he noted that Buck Adams did a much better adaptation of the Super Mario franchise than the Super Mario Bros. live-action film.[2] Initially, Parsons wondered how such a film escaped the attention of the Internet for so long.[3]

The Cinema Snob reviewed both Super Hornio Brothers and Super Hornio Brothers 2. While noting that the films are considered to be the "holy grail" of pornographic parodies, The Cinema Snob ripped into both of them, noting the inconsistencies of the pornographic parodies, ranging from how characters were named and cast, ways that the films could better themselves using various Super Mario video game sound effects, to overt references to 1990s Los Angeles such as the 1992 Los Angeles riots.[1][10]

Other parodies[edit]

Super Barrio Bros., a gay and Latino-themed adult spoof, was released in 1994, and was followed Super Barrio Bros. Strike Back one year later. [11] [12]

Super Mario Ballbusting And Cockbiting - A Femdom XXX Parody was released in 2011. [13]

References[edit]

  1. ^ a b c "Super Hornio Brothers". The Cinema Snob. August 5, 2010. Retrieved February 17, 2012. 
  2. ^ a b c d "The Super Hornio Brothers Saga". Something Awful. June 25, 2009. Retrieved February 17, 2012. 
  3. ^ a b c d "A Horrors of Porn Call to Action". Something Awful. August 7, 2008. Retrieved February 17, 2012. 
  4. ^ a b "The Long, Hard Search for the Infamous Mario Porno". Kotaku. December 26, 2011. Retrieved February 23, 2012. 
  5. ^ "Kotaku reports on Super Hornio Brothers". Ron Jeremy's official website. December 29, 2011. Retrieved February 23, 2012. 
  6. ^ "The ‘Super Hornio Brothers’ Mystery Gets a Christmas Revival". AVN. December 27, 2011. Retrieved February 17, 2012. 
  7. ^ "Vintage Porn Parodies: "Super Hornio Brothers"". Fleshbot. June 25, 2009. Retrieved February 17, 2012. 
  8. ^ "A Tale Of Miracles: The Internet's Search For A Mario Porno". Gameranx. December 26, 2011. Retrieved February 17, 2012. 
  9. ^ "(NSFW) Super Hornio Bros VHS still-in-box!". October 29, 2014. 
  10. ^ "Super Hornio Brothers II". The Cinema Snob. October 10, 2010. Retrieved February 17, 2012. 
  11. ^ Skee, Mickey (1 June 1994). "Super Barrio Bros.". avn.com. Adult Video News. Retrieved 11 September 2013. 
  12. ^ Travis, Aaron (1 March 1995). "Super Barrio Bros. Strike Back". avn.com. Adult Video News. Retrieved 11 September 2013. 
  13. ^ "Femdom ballbusting porn parodies from Ultima". pornparody.com. Porn Parody. 27 July 2011. Retrieved 11 September 2013. 

External links[edit]