Article now GA, see review below.Shaidar cuebiyar (talk) 02:07, 5 June 2009 (UTC)[reply]
- This review is transcluded from Talk:Showdown (Pendulum song)/GA1. The edit link for this section can be used to add comments to the review.
Review by Shaidar cuebiyar ( talk | contribs )
Resolved comments from Shaidar_cuebiyar
External links check
- I ran a links check and found problems getting to some external sites:
- game site appears to be a dead link since 3 May 2009. —Removed
- itunes store didn't follow through for me.
- Do you have the required iTunes software installed? I've added a note to that effect now, just to clarify it. The link still follows through for me.
- You've nailed the problem.Shaidar cuebiyar (talk) 22:39, 31 May 2009 (UTC)[reply]
General comments
- There appears to be no mention of their relocation to the UK in this article: relevant to the song's background and release history.
- I don't know what you want me to say here, the band moved five years before this song was released. Short of commenting on that fact there isn't a lot I can say about it.
- Yeah a comment in the Background and writing section would be suitable. Try, starting with Pendulum had relocated to the UK in 2003 where the band released their debut album, Hold Your Colour, in 2005.. This will result in slight changes to the following sentence: for the album > for the second album.
- My point here is that a casual reader should be given the background as to why Pendulum's work is released in UK and there is no release history for Australia, if they are an Australian band.Shaidar cuebiyar (talk) 21:58, 2 June 2009 (UTC)[reply]
- Infobox: when/where was the song recorded?
- I've added the years spanned by the various recording times of the song. However, each of the versions available on the single was recorded separately, and I have only been able to find the Live at the Brixton Academy date and location exactly. Are you looking for anything more on this?
- DoneShaidar cuebiyar (talk) 21:58, 2 June 2009 (UTC)[reply]
Background and writing
- Consider "Showdown" was originally written and produced for the album In Silico by Rob Swire.[2] Swire's production of the track is not referenced at APRA (ref #2), move ref #13 &/or #14 up here. —Done
Critical reception
- "Showdown" has been subject to some generally positive reviews from various music critics. > "Showdown" has received generally positive reviews from music critics. —Done
- When giving a direct cite, keep the original formatting. e.g. a snappy and slightly abrasive number that will keep their new found fans amongst the Kerrang! reading community very happy. > a snappy and slightly abrasive number that will keep their new found fans amongst the Kerrang reading community, very happy. Note Adair did not use the '!'. —Done, but the original quote also included an erroneous comma. Should this be included as well, along with the appropriate [sic]?
- Keep erroneous comma in quote, its part of the formatting.Shaidar cuebiyar (talk) 22:39, 31 May 2009 (UTC)[reply]
- The single was also chosen as the "single of the week" > It was chosen as "Single of the Week". As this is the title of a regular award. Also removes repetition of 'single'. —Done
Music video
- The music video for "Showdown", directed by Nick Bartleet, was released on MySpaceTV on 12 December 2008 to promote the upcoming release of the single. > The music video for "Showdown", directed by Nick Bartleet, was released on MySpaceTV on 12 December 2008 to promote Pendulum's upcoming single. Thereby removing release repetition. —Done
- which contributed to one critic describing the video as "highly problematic". Since Knight was already named in the Critical reception section this can be rendered as which contributed to Knight describing the video as "highly problematic". —Done
Promotional video game
- shortly after the release of the music video, Pendulum released a Space Invaders themed video game to further promote their upcoming single, "Showdown". > shortly after the release of the music video, a Space Invaders themed video game was presented on their website to further promote "Showdown". —Done, with slightly different arrangement.
- can unlock more of the live at the Brixton Academy version of "Showdown". > can unlock more of the 'Live at the Brixton Academy' version of "Showdown". Ties in better with Track 6. —Done, but are those supposed to be single quotes?
- Go for "Live at the Brixton Academy" version if you prefer.Shaidar cuebiyar (talk) 22:39, 31 May 2009 (UTC)[reply]
- Comment
- Since the game link is now dead and deleted from this article, you will have to change sentences here to past tense, e.g. players who submit their details can unlock more > players who submitted their details could unlock more. Other changes in next sentence.Shaidar cuebiyar (talk) 01:33, 2 June 2009 (UTC)[reply]
- —Tense changed in all occurrences that I could find.
Formats and track listings
- Needs ref for Swire as producer. —Done
Personnel
- The following people contributed to "Showdown". > "Showdown" is credited to: —Done
- Which ones are Pendulum members? —Segregated into two lists; Pendulum members and other contributors.
- Who did the artwork: i.e. cover art? Photos? Logo design?
- I've added the logo designer (he is credited on the album In Silico for the same logo). I am unable to verify if who designed the rest of the cover or the photographer, I haven't found a single source on this anywhere. It's not on the vinyl sleeve, and the only other format the single was released in wasn't physical. Any suggestions on this one?
- More information may become available over time: I would have thought the Official website would have more on this but apparently not. In any case, you've made a very good try of it. So DoneShaidar cuebiyar (talk) 01:50, 5 June 2009 (UTC)[reply]
Video personnel
- The following people contributed to the music video for "Showdown". > "Showdown" music video is credited to: —Done, with slightly different arrangement.
- Are Phythian, Bailey and Moule acting in roles in the video? Or did Moule commission the video, and Pythian and Bailey instruct the actors in the martial arts moves?
- Phythian and Bailey acted roles in the video (indeed Phythian was the lead role) and Moule just commissioned the video. What is the best way of clarifying this in the article?
- Try,
- *Zara Phythian – actor, lead martial artist
- *Helen Bailey – actor, martial artist
- *John Moule – commisioner of video
- Hopefully this differentiates the roles of these personnel. I momentarily though that Moule could be acting as a 'fight commisioner' in the video.Shaidar cuebiyar (talk) 21:58, 2 June 2009 (UTC)[reply]
- No worries, hopefully that is now done.
References
- Win an In Silico Gold Disc > Win an In Silico gold disc suits formatting in their article and in the Promotional video game section here. —Done
- Looks good.
- Publisher needed. Try Macrovision. —Done
- Looks good.
- Date of article? Try 1 July 2008. Italicise magazine title. —Done
Other refs look okay. Note allmusic site also lists credits for the album, standard edition here and expanded edition here.
Shaidar cuebiyar (talk) 14:33, 30 May 2009 (UTC)[reply]
- Thanks for the very thorough review. I'll start working through these, adding notes above as I go. When I'm done I'll let you know – Ikara talk → 20:16, 31 May 2009 (UTC)[reply]
- Just a short note: some reviewers don't approve of their comments being
crossed out as they like to decide for themselves whether a comment has been satisfactorily dealt with, however I don't mind if you do so. Looks like you're going along well.Shaidar cuebiyar (talk) 22:39, 31 May 2009 (UTC)[reply]
- Sorry, that was a bad habit I picked up in a peer review. I've removed the strike throughs anyway as it makes it easier to read through the comments. I've almost finished the list, although there I'm having some problems with the last couple of items, as per above – Ikara talk → 13:55, 2 June 2009 (UTC)[reply]
Support
This is a good article, as it is—
- Well-written:
- (a) the prose is clear, concise, and understandable to an appropriately broad audience; spelling and grammar are correct; and
- (b) it complies with the Manual of Style guidelines for lead sections, layout, words to watch, fiction, and list incorporation.
- Verifiable with no original research:
- (a) it contains a list of all references (sources of information), presented in accordance with the layout style guideline;
- (b) reliable sources are cited inline. All content that could reasonably be challenged, except for plot summaries and that which summarizes cited content elsewhere in the article, must be cited no later than the end of the paragraph (or line if the content is not in prose); and
- (c) it contains no original research.
- Broad in its coverage:
- (a) it addresses the main aspects of the topic; and
- (b) it stays focused on the topic without going into unnecessary detail (see summary style).
- Neutral: it represents viewpoints fairly and without editorial bias, giving due weight to each.
- Stable: it does not change significantly from day to day because of an ongoing edit war or content dispute.
- Illustrated, if possible, by media such as images, video, or audio:
- (a) media are tagged with their copyright statuses, and valid non-free use rationales are provided for non-free content; and
- (b) media are relevant to the topic, and have suitable captions.
It passed.Shaidar cuebiyar (talk) 02:00, 5 June 2009 (UTC)[reply] |
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