The Onion Movie
|The Onion Movie|
|Directed by||James Kleiner|
|Produced by||David Zucker|
|Written by||Todd Hanson
Robert D. Siegel
|Music by||Asche & Spencer|
|Edited by||Frederick Wardell|
3 Arts Entertainment
|Distributed by||Fox Searchlight Pictures|
|Running time||80 minutes|
The Onion Movie is a comedy film written by The Onion writers Robert D. Siegel and Todd Hanson along with the Chicago-based writing staff of the paper. It was filmed in 2003 and released on June 3, 2008 direct-to-video.
The plot revolves around a fictitious Onion television news anchorman, Norm Archer (Len Cariou), who is forced to face the inevitability of a corporate takeover by the Onions perennial fictitious multinational, Global Tetrahedron. Onion news is described as "fair and balanced" in the context of the film. The plot serves as a springboard for various comedy sketches featuring The Onion's satirical humor. Vignettes include parodies of music videos reminiscent of Britney Spears' work, and Steven Seagal appearing as a parody of the type of action hero he normally portrays. The film is interrupted (fictitiously) by film reviewers and commentators weighing in on the progress of the film, with one commentator preparing to stage an immediate walkout of all African American audience members unless a positive portrayal of an African American is inserted into the film.
- Len Cariou as Norm Archer
- Larissa Laskin as Dana Dobbs
- Scott Klace as Kip Kendall
- Steven Seagal as Cock Puncher
- Sarah McElligott as Melissa Cherry
- Brendan Fletcher as Tim, a white black guy
- Richard Fancy as Kenneth Garber
- Murphy Dunne as Raymond Marcus
- Alex Solowitz as The Masses
- Rebecca Lowman as Julie, a rape victim
- Amy Davies as Board game woman
- Clint Culp as Bates computer customer
- Paul Scheer as Dirk, a Bates computer salesman
- Nick Chinlund as Bryce Brand
- Jim Rash as Bryce's manager
- Jed Rees as Wizard proteus
- Greg Pitts as Wizards dragonmaster
- Kirk Ward as Brendan Laroux, a legless hockey
- Greg Cipes as Hippie diplomant
- Yevgeni Lazarev as Slovesevic
- Adam Gregor as Birajko
- Ahmed Ahmed as Ahmed
- Kevin Federline as Lollipop Love dancer
- Robert Hoffman as Lollipop Love dancer
- Natasha Yi as Melissa Cherry video dancer
- Meredith Baxter as Cooking show chef
- Erik Stolhanske as Producer
- Michael Bolton as Himself
- Rodney Dangerfield as Himself
In 2003, New Regency Productions and Fox Searchlight Pictures were on board to produce and release a movie written by The Onion staff. Tentatively titled The Untitled Onion Movie, it was to be directed by music video director Tom Kuntz and Mike Maguire and written by then Onion editor Robert Siegel and writer Todd Hanson with the rest of the Onion staff. After delays and previews to test audiences, the film was shelved and eventually dropped by Fox. New Regency Productions continued on with project.
In a March 15, 2007 interview, Scott Aukerman said that the Onion movie was at a "dead standstill". Within two weeks, the listing for The Untitled Onion Movie had disappeared. Additionally, Onion, Inc. President at the time, Sean Mills, indicated The Onion was no longer associated with the film project. In August 2007, the IMDb listing was restored.
In November 2007, then-President Sean Mills told Wikinews that the movie was a dead project. Although Fox Searchlight had an option to release it on DVD, there was no immediate announcement of plans to do so. Eventually, the trailer appeared on the DVD for The Darjeeling Limited. The trailer also appeared on the Hitman, Charlie Bartlett and Aliens vs. Predator: Requiem DVDs.
The UK release's packaging styles the film News Movie, aka The Onion Movie.
- "The Fun Bunch: Do you believe in inevitabilities!?: 2007 That Other Paper Article".
- Learmonth, Michael (March 26, 2007). "Onion launching video newscast: March 26, 2007 Variety Article".
- "20 Movies Not Coming Soon to a Theater Near You".
- The Onion: An interview with 'America's Finest News Source'
- Shankbone, David, "An interview with The Onion" Wikinews, November 24, 2007.
- Peter Kafka (March 2, 2008). "The Onion Movie - Debuting At A DVD Player Near You - Silicon Alley Insider". Alleyinsider.com. Retrieved February 13, 2012.
- Onion Movie, The UNRATED DVD: Steven Seagal (Marked for Death), Len Cariou (1408), Daniel Dae Kim (TV s Lost)[dead link][dead link]
- The Onion Movie at the Internet Movie Database
- "The Onion Movie". Rotten Tomatoes. Retrieved August 21, 2013.