"Toilet Paper" is the third episode of the South Park (season 7) of the American animated television series South Park, and the 99th episode of the series overall. It first aired on Comedy Central on April 2, 2003. In the episode, the boys decide to get revenge on their art teacher for giving them detention by covering her house in toilet paper. Kyle starts having nightmares about the ordeal and is desperate to confess, but Cartman goes all out to stop him.
The episode was written by series co-creator Trey Parker and is rated TV-MA L in the United States. It is a parody of the 1991 movie The Silence of the Lambs.
Mrs. Dreibel, the art teacher, gives the boys detention for making a phallus out of clay in art class. Infuriated, they take revenge by toilet papering her house that night. Kyle is horrified to discover that she has kids and soon regrets the deed, later having nightmares about it. The next day, the boys are called to the counsellor's office, and Cartman comes up with a ridiculously elaborate alibi. With Kyle struggling to comprehend the details of this convoluted story, Cartman grows concerned that he may confess. Cartman decides to eliminate the risk of Kyle confessing by taking matters into his own hands. He takes Kyle on a boat ride on Stark's Pond and begins to beat him with a wiffle bat, which was the only weapon he could afford. Kyle, nevertheless, is so guilt-ridden that he does not defend himself.
Officer Barbrady absurdly exaggerates the weight of the crime and begins an investigation, but is unable to come up with any solid leads. He seeks help from Josh, a convicted toilet-paperer, who is serving a three-week sentence in Park County Juvenile Hall for toilet papering over 600 houses in less than a year. After several interviews, during which Josh applies psychological pressure on Barbrady, he comes a little closer to solving the case. Later, Barbrady forces a confession out of Butters after injecting him with sodium pentothal and interrogating him for over forty hours, but Butters' parents, furious, arrive to absolve him and ground him for confessing (yet again) to a crime that he did not commit. After seeing Butters get in trouble for their actions, Stan and Kenny are finally convinced that they ought to confess. Stan tells Cartman that, if he has a conscience, he will do the same. Cartman, however, is completely oblivious to the concept of "feeling bad for other people" and is utterly bewildered at his friends' reasoning.
The next morning, Barbrady brings Josh along with him to Principal Victoria's office, but before he can speak, Mr. Mackey announces that the true toilet paperer has already confessed. Just then, Stan, Kyle and Kenny rush into the office, only to find out that it is Cartman, having obviously done it in a bid to secure a better deal for himself: each of the boys ends up with two-week detention, except for Cartman, who gets only one for "being brave" (Cartman considered it a pyrrhic victory, as he later laments having to spend one week of detention). Josh manages to trick the police and flee. At the conclusion of the episode, he calls Officer Barbrady and thanks him for enabling his escape. Despite Barbrady's pleas—"Josh, you have to go back to Juvenile Hall: you only have a three-week sentence!"—Josh puts down the phone and, armed with bags of toilet paper, slowly approaches the White House as sinister music plays in the background.
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- When the boys arrive at Mrs. Dreibel's house, Kyle says "We didn't say nothin' about no kids, man," a reference to Tony Montana in Scarface.
- Officer Barbrady speaking into a handheld tape recorder while inspecting Mrs. Dreibel's house alludes to a habit held by FBI Special Agent Dale Cooper of the television series Twin Peaks.
- Josh's scenes and feigned behavior are an allusion to the character Hannibal Lecter from Thomas Harris' novels, particularly Silence of the Lambs and Anthony Hopkins' portrayal of the character in the film adaptation The Silence of the Lambs.
- The scene in which the boys toilet paper Mrs. Dreibel's house is a reference to the film Platoon. (Adagio for Strings by Samuel Barber plays in the background).
- The scene where Officer Barbrady reveals the toilet paper in the bag the name "John Doe" is shown in the background which is a reference to the movie Se7en.
- The scene in which Cartman and Kyle go out on the lake is akin to the scene in The Godfather Part II in which Neri shoots Fredo in the head on Lake Tahoe. Music from the film can also be heard playing during this sequence.
- In Kyle's second dream sequence is real footage of figure skater Nancy Kerrigan screaming "Why!? Why!?" after her attack.
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