Minor characters from The Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy

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The following is a list of minor characters in the various versions of The Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy, by Douglas Adams.

Contents

[edit] Characters

[edit] Agrajag

Agrajag is a piteous creature that is continually reincarnated and subsequently killed unknowingly by Arthur Dent each time. Technically, Agrajag first appears in the series as a falling bowl of petunias and also identifies the Sperm whale as his spirit brother (i.e him in a different incarnation), although he is not identified as such until a later book. In another incarnation, he was a prehistoric rabbit who was killed by Arthur for breakfast and whose skin was fashioned into a pouch, which is then used to swat a fly who also happened to be Agrajag. In yet another, he dies of a heart attack after seeing Arthur and Ford materialize, seated on a Chesterfield sofa, in the midst of a cricket match at Lord's Cricket Ground.

Eventually, Agrajag becomes aware of his many past incarnations and wishes to take revenge on Arthur Dent and he diverts Arthur's teleportation to the Cathedral of Hate for revenge. However, in the process of explaining his reasons for hating Arthur he mentions “Stavromula Beta”, where Arthur ducks to avoid a shot fired by an assassin, which then hits Agrajag instead. Arthur, never having been to Stavromula Beta, has no idea what Agrajag is talking about, and Agrajag realizes that he’s brought Arthur to the Cathedral too early. Thus, any attempt by Agrajag to kill Arthur would be logically impossible. He tries to kill Arthur anyway, and once again dies at Arthur's hands, but not before setting off the explosives intended to kill Arthur by triggering a massive rockfall. Because of cause and effect and the laws of time and the universe (not to mention dramatic necessity), Arthur escapes the rockfall unharmed.

For the next few years Arthur travels the universe, secure in his knowledge that, no matter what happens, he cannot die at least until after he survives his assassination attempt at Stavromula Beta. In “Mostly Harmless” Arthur’s daughter Random Frequent Flyer Dent holds him hostage in a New York club. When she fires her weapon Arthur dodges, causing the bolt to pass over his head and hit the man standing behind him. As the man falls dead a business card falls out of his pocket, which reveals him to be Stavro Mueller, owner of the Beta club. Thus, what Arthur believed to be the name of a planet was actually the name of a person, and Agrajag has died once again. Because of this, Arthur is now able to die as well, which, due to the Vogons, he does a few seconds later.

In the 2004/2005 BBC Radio series versions of the last three books of Adams' series, Douglas Adams plays Agrajag, having recorded the part for an audiobook version of Life, the Universe and Everything. Producer Dirk Maggs added a suitable voice treatment, and Simon Jones as Arthur Dent recorded his lines opposite the pre-recorded Adams. Adams was thus able to "reincarnate" to participate in the new series.

Appears in:

[edit] Alice Beeblebrox, Mrs

Alice Beeblebrox is Zaphod's favourite mother, and guards the true story of Zaphod's visit to the Frogstar, waiting for "the right price." She is referenced in Fit the Eighth.

[edit] Allitnils, The

As their names were written to suggest, every Allitnil is an anti-clone of a Lintilla. They were created by the cloning company to eliminate the billions of cloned Lintillas flooding out of a malfunctioning cloning machine. Being anti-clones, when an Allitnil comes into physical contact with a Lintilla, they both wink out of existence in a puff of unsmoke.

Along with Poodoo and Varntvar the Priest, three Allitnils arrived on Brontitall to get the three Lintillas there to "agree to cease to be". Two of the clones eliminate their corresponding Lintillas, but Arthur shoots the third Allitnil, so that one Lintilla survives.

Appearing only in the final episode of the second radio series, every one of the Allitnils are voiced by David Tate.

[edit] Almighty Bob

The Almighty Bob is a deity worshipped by the people of Lamuella. Old Thrashbarg is one of the priests who worships Almighty Bob; however, Thrashbarg is often ignored by the villagers of Lamuella. The character may be a reference to The Church of the SubGenius.

[edit] Anjie

Anjie was a woman, on the brink of retirement, and on whose behalf a raffle was being held in order to buy her a kidney machine. An unnamed woman (played by June Whitfield on the radio) convinces Arthur Dent to buy raffle tickets while he and Fenchurch are in a railway pub, attempting to have lunch. Arthur won an album of bagpipe music.

Referred to in: So Long, and Thanks for All the Fish

[edit] Arcane Jill Watson

Wife of John Watson, aka Wonko the Sane. Appears in So Long, and Thanks for all the Fish. Arcane Jill Watson tells Arthur on the phone the number of light years her husband is from the phone, and invites Arthur and Fenchurch to California. Also, Arcane is known to be the one who fills John Watson's fish bowl (A parting gift from the dolphins) with wheat germ, and when it was empty at the time of Arthur and Fenchurch's visit, going to buy some more wheat germ to fill it.

[edit] Arcturan Megafreighter crew

The captain and first officer were the only crew of an Arcturan Megafreighter carrying a larger number of copies of Playbeing magazine than the mind can comfortably conceive. They brought Zaphod Beeblebrox to Ursa Minor Beta, after he had escaped from the Haggunenon flag ship. Zaphod was let on board by the Number One, who was cynical about the Guide's editors becoming soft. He admired the fact that Zaphod was "hitching the hard way".

They only appear in Fit the Seventh of the radio series, where the captain is played by David Tate, and his number one by Bill Paterson. However, some of their dialogue was given to other characters in The Restaurant at the End of the Universe.

[edit] Barmen

Three different barmen appear during the series.

[edit] Barman of the Horse and Groom

In the first book, in the TV series and the film, Ford and Arthur quickly down three pints - at lunchtime - to calm their muscles before using the teleport to escape on the Vogon ship. Being told the world is about to end he calls "last orders, please." The Red Lion Inn was used during the TV series, and referenced in the dialogue (Adams himself can be seen in the background of this scene); Steve Conway played the character on TV. This barman was played by David Gooderson in the original radio series and Stephen Moore in the LP recording. In the 2005 motion picture, Albie Woodington portrayed this particular barman.

[edit] Barman in Old Pink Dog Bar

Ford visits the Old Pink Dog Bar in Han Dold City, orders a round for everyone and then tries to use an American Express card to pay for it, fails, is threatened by a disembodied hand and so offers a Guide write-up instead. This happens in So Long, and Thanks for All the Fish. In the radio adaptation of this novel, the barman was played by Arthur Smith.

[edit] Barman in the Domain of the King

Another barman takes a galactic sized tip for Elvis from Ford on his Hitchhiker's corporate Dine-O-Charge credit card in an attempt to bankrupt InfiniDim Enterprises in Mostly Harmless and the final radio series. This bartender was played by Roger Gregg.

[edit] BBC department head

When Arthur returns to the Earth in So Long and Thanks for All the Fish he calls his department head to explain why he was absent from work the last six months: "I've gone mad.". His superior is very relaxed about it and asks when Arthur will return to work, and is quite satisfied by the reply "When do hedgehogs stop hibernating?". In the recent radio series, the part is played by Geoffrey Perkins.

[edit] Blart Versenwald III

In the epilogue of So Long, and Thanks for All the Fish, Blart Versenwald III was a top genetic engineer, and a man who could never keep his mind on the job at hand. When his homeworld was under threat from an invading army, he was tasked with creating an army of super-soldiers to fight them. Instead, he created (among other things) a remarkable new breed of superfly that could distinguish between solid glass and an open window, with an off-switch for children. Fortunately, because the invaders were only invading because they couldn't cope with things back home, they too were impressed with Blart's creations, and a flurry of economic treaties rapidly secured peace.

There is apparently a relevance of this tale to So Long, and Thanks for All the Fish, but it temporarily escaped the author's mind.

[edit] Bodyguard

The strong silent type, an unnamed bodyguard is seen guarding the late Hotblack Desiato in The Restaurant at the End of the Universe. In Episode Five of the TV series he is portrayed by actor David Prowse, Star Wars' Darth Vader, as a man of few words who can lift Ford Prefect clean off the floor. In the LP adaptation of the radio series, the character was voiced by David Tate.

[edit] Caveman

Arthur attempts to play Scrabble with a caveman, who is not even able to spell "Grunt" and "Agh", and "he's probably spelt library with one R". However, he does spell "forty-two", giving Arthur the idea to pull out letters from the letters bag at random to attempt to find the ultimate question. Either the Vogons destroying the Earth five minutes too early, or the Golgafrinchan's interference, results in Arthur's brainwave patterns providing the unhelpful "What do you get when you multiply six by nine?" (42 in base 13).

Appears in Fit the Sixth Played by David Jason, the novel The Restaurant at the End of the Universe, and TV Episode Six.

[edit] Colin

Colin is a small, round, melon-sized, flying security robot which Ford Prefect enslaves to aid in his escape from the newly re-organized Guide offices in Mostly Harmless. Ford captures Colin by trapping the robot with his towel and re-wiring the robot's pleasure circuits, inducing a cyber-ecstasy trip.

Ford uses Colin's cheerfulness to break into the Guide's corporate accounting software in order to plant a Trojan Horse module that will automatically pay anything billed to his InfiniDim Enterprises credit card. Colin also saves Ford's life when the Guide's new security force, the Vogons, fire at him with a rocket launcher after Ford feels the need to jump out of the window. Colin was last seen being sent (at the risk of possible lonely incineration) to look after the delivery of the Guide Mark II to Arthur Dent in the Vogon's postal system.

Colin was named after a dog belonging to a girl Ford had "fond memories" of: Emily Saunders. Colin appears in Mostly Harmless and in the radio series he was played by Andrew Secombe.

[edit] Dr. Dan Streetmentioner

Author of Time Traveller's Handbook of 1001 Tense Formations which is handy for those travelling through time, and especially to Milliways. His guide is more complete than The Guide itself, which ignores the time travel tense topic – other than pointing out that the term 'future perfect' has been abandoned since it was discovered not to be. He is also mentioned in the third radio series, which gives many examples of his tense forms.

[edit] Deep Thought

Deep Thought is a computer that was created by the pan-dimensional, hyper-intelligent race of beings of planet Magrathea to come up with the ultimate answer to Life, the Universe, and Everything. When, after seven and a half million years of calculation, the answer finally turns out to be 42, Deep Thought's creators sheepishly realize that they do not know the question whence the ultimate answer turned out to be.

Deep Thought itself does not know the ultimate question to Life, the Universe and Everything, but offers to design an even more powerful computer (Earth; see Earth in fiction) to calculate it. After ten million years of calculation, the Earth is destroyed by Vogons five minutes before the computation is complete.

Appears in:

On radio, Deep Thought was voiced by Geoffrey McGivern. On television and in the LP re-recording of the radio series, he was voiced by Valentine Dyall. In the feature film Deep Thought's voice was provided by actress Helen Mirren.

In the television series, Deep Thought was shaped like a massive, black, and metal trapezoid with a yellow rectangular display that blinked on and off in time with the computer's speaking. The timing of the light's flashing was done on set by author Douglas Adams. Valentine Dyall's voice was dubbed in later.

In the feature film, it appears as a large, vaguely humanoid computer, with a gigantic head supported, as if in a bored repose, by two arms. This particular version of Deep Thought likes to watch television and late in the film can also be seen to have the Apple Computer logo above its eye. This is a reference to Adams being a fan and advocate of the Apple Macintosh until his death.

IBM's chess-playing computer Deep Thought was named in honour of this fictional computer.

The technology-related website Deep Thought[2] was named after this fictional computer.

Deep Thought can be seen inscribed on a computer in the NORAD VI area of the 1992 computer game The Journeyman Project.

Regarding the naming of this character, all Douglas Adams was ever quoted as saying (in Neil Gaiman's book Don't Panic: The Official Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy Companion) was that "The name is a very obvious joke."

Further to the above quote regarding the "very obvious joke", in a later radio interview with Book Club on BBC Radio 4 in January 2000, when asked the question on the origin of the name, he said it was based on "Deep Throat". Image:Deep Thought.png a picture of Deep Thought from the 2005 movie

[edit] Disaster Area's chief research accountant

Disaster Area's chief research accountant

As Disaster Area's earnings require hypermathematics, their chief research accountant was named Professor of Neomathematics at the University of Maximegalon and in his Special Theories of Tax Returns he proves that space-time is "not merely curved, it is, in fact, totally bent."

Referred to in:

See also: #Hotblack Desiato

[edit] Dish of the Day

The quadruped Dish of the Day is an Ameglian Major Cow, a Ruminant specifically bred to not only have the desire to be eaten, but to be capable of saying so quite clearly and distinctly. When asked if he would like to see the Dish of the Day, Zaphod replies: "let's meet the meat." The Major Cow's quite vocal and emphatic desire to be consumed by Milliways' patrons greatly distresses Arthur Dent, and the Dish is nonplussed by a queasy Arthur's subsequent order of a green salad, since he knows "many vegetables that are very clear" on the point of not wanting to be eaten — which was part of the reason for the creation of the Ameglian Major Cow in the first place. After Zaphod orders four rare steaks, the Dish announces that he is nipping off to the kitchen to shoot himself. Though he states, "I'll be very humane," this does not comfort Arthur at all.

Appears in:

The character is not present in the original radio series, but does make a cameo appearance in the finale of the fifth radio series. The first appearance of him was in a stage adaptation in 1980 at the Rainbow Theatre. Since then he appeared in the second novel, and the television series. In the TV series, he was played by Peter Davison, who was at that time both Sandra Dickinson's husband and the newly announced fifth Doctor Who. Dickinson played Trillian in the television series (and "Tricia McMillan" in the final radio series), and suggested casting Davison, who was a fan of the radio series.

[edit] East River Creature

As Ford Prefect travels through space in a Sirius Cybernetics Corporation spaceship, he has a dream in which he encounters a strange creature made of slime from the East River in New York who has just come into existence. After asking Ford a series of questions about life, and Ford's recommendation of finding love on 7th Avenue, the creature leaves Ford to talk to a nearby policeman on his status in life.

Appearances:

In Fit the Twenty-First, the East River character was played by American comedian Jackie Mason.

[edit] Eccentrica Gallumbits

Known as "The Triple-Breasted Whore of Eroticon Six", Eccentrica Gallumbits is first mentioned in The Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy when Arthur looks up Earth for the first time in the guide. The entry for Earth is under that of Eccentrica Gallumbits. She is heard about again during a newscast that Zaphod Beeblebrox tunes into shortly after stealing the spaceship Heart of Gold. The newsreader quotes Eccentrica describing Zaphod as "The best bang since the Big One." It was also reported in Fit the Ninth of the radio series that Zaphod had delivered a presidential address from her bedroom on at least one occasion.

Pears Gallumbit, a dessert which has several things in common with her, is available at The Restaurant at the End of the Universe. This dish is likely a play on Peach Melba, which is likewise named for a famous woman.

Some people say her erogenous zones start some four miles from her actual body. Ford Prefect disagrees, saying five.

This character never actually appears in the series, but is mentioned by various characters in all five of the books. In the 2005 movie, however, we see her giant legs as Ford attempts to reason with her on Viltvodle VI.

In a possible homage to the series, the film Total Recall features a triple-breasted prostitute (played by Lycia Naff); it also features a number of other references to the Guide, such as wrapping a towel around one's head to avoid being found (synonymous with the Ravenous Bugblatter Beast of Traal).

She is referenced in an issue of the Legion of Super Heroes.[citation needed]

[edit] Eddie

Eddie is the name of the shipboard computer on the starship Heart of Gold. Like every other system on the spaceship, it has a Sirius Cybernetics Corporation Genuine People Personality. Thus, Eddie is over-excitable, quite talkative, over-enthused and extremely ingratiating, or alternatively a coddling, school matron-type after a particularly morose conversation with Marvin the paranoid android. Shipboard networking interconnects Eddie with everything from the air conditioning upwards on the Heart of Gold, with the downside the whole ship is effectively crippled by Arthur Dent's request for tea from Nutrimatic Drink Dispenser, the computation of which nearly crashed Eddie and everything connected to him.

On one occasion when certain destruction seems quite imminent, Eddie sings "You'll Never Walk Alone" in a particularly cheesy and upbeat tone.

Appears in:

He is voiced in the first two radio series and on television by David Tate. In the television version, Eddie has lights on his case that flash when he speaks. Douglas Adams read in Eddie's lines during filming to operate the lights.

In the 2004-2005 radio series, he is voiced by Roger Gregg and in the 2005 feature film by Thomas Lennon.

[edit] Effrafax of Wug

A sciento-magician who bet his life that he could make an entire mountain invisible within a year. Having wasted most of the period of time failing to create a cloaking device, he hired a company to simply remove the mountain, though this course of action lost him the bet, and his life, due in part to the sudden and rather suspicious presence of an extra moon, and the fact that you could never touch anything when you walked near the supposed invisible mountain. It is remarked that he should have simply established a simple Somebody Else's Problem field, which would make the mountain totally invisible simply by making it look unusual (and therefore like it's somebody else's problem), such as by painting it bright pink.

Referenced in: Life, the Universe and Everything.

[edit] Elders of Krikkit

The Elders of Krikkit were, in Life, the Universe and Everything, under influence of the remains of the supercomputer Hactar, which æons previously had been blown to dust, but retained a measure of consciousness, and determined to destroy the entire universe using the supernova bomb they had built. Trillian used her feminine charm and smart rhetoric in an attempt to dissuade the elders, but failed to stop them deploying the ultimate weapon, which simply dented the council chamber very badly.

[edit] Emily Saunders

Emily Saunders was a girl that Ford Prefect had "very fond memories of." He initially thought of her name when trying to choose a name for the security robot he had captured. He decided that Emily Saunders was an absurd name for the robot and chose to name it after her dog, Colin.

Referenced in: Mostly Harmless.

[edit] Elvis Presley

Elvis Presley is a real-life singer, who died in 1977. It has been popularly suggested that he has been abducted by aliens, or that he is actually an alien who faked his own death so he could return to his home planet.

In Mostly Harmless, Elvis is discovered by Ford Prefect and Arthur Dent working as a bar singer on an alien planet, and owning a large pink spaceship. Ford, having become a huge fan of Elvis while he was stranded on Earth, watched the performance intently for its entire duration. Presley is not actually named, however his identity is easy to determine from the facts that the bar is called "The Domain of The King," the "EP" initials in the pink spaceship which Ford and Arthur buy from him, and the accent in which he sings.

Ford's irreplaceable blue suede shoes, one of which is destroyed during the events in the early part of Mostly Harmless are a tribute to his Elvis fandom.

In the radio adaptation of Mostly Harmless, The Quintessential Phase, it has been indicated that in the alternate Earth which is the focus of the story, Elvis never died, and there is mention of an album "Elvis sings Oasis". He appears (but is not directly named) in Fit the Twenty-Sixth, voiced by Philip Pope.

[edit] Emperor of the Galaxy

The final Emperor of the Galactic Empire in the Hitchhiker's universe was placed into a stasis field within his dying moments many millennia prior to the events of the series. This left the Empire without a ruling Emperor, as the last of the Emperor's heirs all died. And so an Imperial President, elected by the Galactic Assembly, was later seen to hold power, without actually wielding any. This was the office held by Yooden Vranx and Zaphod Beeblebrox.

Referenced in:

[edit] Eric Bartlett

In the final novel, it is gardener Eric Bartlett who discovers that space-aliens have landed on Tricia's lawn and hasn't cut her grass.

[edit] Fenchurch

"This time it was right, it would work, and no one would have to get nailed to anything"
"This time it was right, it would work, and no one would have to get nailed to anything"

Fenchurch is Arthur Dent's soulmate in the fourth book of the Hitchhiker "trilogy", So Long, and Thanks For All the Fish. Fenchurch was named after the Fenchurch Street railway station where she was conceived in the ticket queue. Adams revealed in an interview that it was really the ticket queues at Paddington Station that made him think of conceiving a character there, but chose Fenchurch as a name because of Paddington Bear.[1]

She first appears as the unnamed girl in the café on the first page of the first book; she is the girl referred to as "sitting on her own in a café in Rickmansworth." In the fourth book, when the Earth and everyone including Fenchurch had mysteriously reappeared, a romantic relationship blooms between her and Arthur Dent. He teaches her to fly, before a first aerial sexual encounter, and a second with Sony Walkmen.

At the beginning of the fifth book, she vanishes abruptly during a hyperspace jump on their first intergalactic holiday. Douglas Adams later claimed that he wanted to get rid of the character as she was getting in the way of the story. Much of this is evident from the self-referential prose surrounding Arthur and Fenchurch's relationship.

In the the Quintessential Phase of the radio series, she is revealed to have been working as a waitress at Milliways since she vanished, and is reunited with Arthur Dent.

In the radio adaptation of So Long and Thanks For All the Fish Fenchurch is played by actress Jane Horrocks.

Appears in:

[edit] Frankie and Benjy Mouse

Frankie and Benjy are the mice that Arthur (et al.) encounter on Magrathea. Frankie and Benjy wish to extract the final readout data from Arthur's brain to get the Ultimate Question to Life, the Universe, and Everything. Frankie and Benjy are, after all, part of the pan-dimensional race that created the Earth as a supercomputer successor to Deep Thought in order to find out the question to which the answer was 42.

In the first version, the radio series, they offered Arthur and Trillian a large amount of money if they could tell them what the Question is. In later versions this was changed - unfortunately for Arthur, they claim the only way to do this is to remove his brain and prepare it, apparently by dicing it. They promise to replace it with a simple computer brain, which, suggested Zaphod, would only have to say things like "What?", "I don't understand" and "Where's the tea?". Arthur objects to this ("What?", he says. "See!" says Zaphod), and escapes with the help of his friends. Frankie says:

I mean, yes idealism, yes the dignity of pure research, yes, the pursuit of truth in all its forms, but there comes a point I'm afraid where you begin to suspect that if there's any real truth it's that the entire multi-dimensional infinity of the Universe is almost certainly being run by a bunch of maniacs; and if it comes to a choice between spending another ten million years finding that out and on the other hand just taking the money and running, I for one could do with the exercise[2]

In the movie, they are in fact the manifestations of Lunkwill and Fook, the pan-dimensional beings who designed and built Deep Thought, and were squashed flat by Arthur Dent when they attempted to remove his brain.

Appear in:

On radio, David Tate played Benjy Mouse and Peter Hawkins voiced Frankie Mouse. They appeared in Fit the Fourth. They also appeared in Episode Four of the TV series, where they were voiced by David Tate and Stephen Moore.

[edit] Frogstar Prisoner Relations Officer

In Fit the Eighth the Frogstar Prisoner Relations Officer (referred to in the scripts as the "FPRO") does his best to annoy Zaphod by hosing him down, letting him think that he escaped to an Ursa Minor robot disco by body debit card, asking him for an autograph and teleporting away whilst Zaphod helps him with his respiratory problem - that he is breathing.

[edit] Gag Halfrunt

"I think that this is perfectly normal behaviour for a psychiatrist"
"I think that this is perfectly normal behaviour for a psychiatrist"

In the series, Gag Halfrunt is arguably the primary antagonist, as he was responsible for the order to destroy Earth. He is also the private brain care specialist of Zaphod Beeblebrox, and is not a major character in terms of the amount of dialogue or prominence he gets. However, he is major in the sense that he has a key influence on the plot (at least in the radio series version). This may be in part because large parts of the series were made up by Adams as he went along, and some of the plot developments and explanations were more a way to tie up some of the glaring loose ends than part of a predetermined master plan.

In the story, the Earth is really a giant computer built to determine the Ultimate Question to Life, the Universe and Everything. Gag Halfrunt (as leader of a group of psychiatrists) is in cahoots with the Vogons to destroy the Earth to prevent the Ultimate Question from ever being discovered. The reason behind this plot is that the psychiatrists cannot afford to have the Ultimate Question revealed, because this would put them out of a job (on the premise that if the Question becomes known, everyone would suddenly start leading happy and productive lives, rendering the entire profession of psychiatry unnecessary). Later the Vogons also try (under Gag's direction) to destroy the starship Heart of Gold, because it is carrying Arthur Dent, who may have the Question buried in his brain somewhere. All of this is unknown to Zaphod because he has brainwashed himself to forget about the collusion (though again this seems to be more of a device to explain why it only becomes clear towards the end of the second series and hasn't been mentioned before). In the end Zaphod "remembers" and does, in fact, find The Ruler of the Universe.

Gag Halfrunt was used since his first appearance in Fit the Second as a running joke; he would remark, in an oddly German accent (possibly in reference to the Austrian psychiatrist Sigmund Freud), whenever asked about Zaphod "Vell, Zaphod's jist zis guy, you know?" This line has become a popular catchphrase among fans of the series.

Appears in:

On radio, he was voiced by Stephen Moore, and appears in Fits the Second, Seventh and Ninth.

On television, he was played by Gil Morris and in the film he is played by Jason Schwartzman. In both these versions he only appears briefly, being interviewed about Zaphod Beeblebrox, and the plot involving the Ruler of the Universe does not appear.

[edit] Gail Andrews

In Mostly Harmless, Gail Andrews is an astrologer who is interviewed by Tricia McMillan about the impact that the discovery of the planet Persephone, or Rupert will have on astrology. She is an advisor to the President of the United States, President Hudson, but denies having recommended the bombing of Damascus.

In the radio series, she appears in Fit the Twenty-Third, and is voiced by Lorelei King.

[edit] Gargravarr

Gargravarr, the disembodied mind and custodian of the Total Perspective Vortex, suffers from real-life dualism and is therefore having trial separation with his body, which has taken his forename Pizpot. The dispute arose over whether sex is better than fishing or not, a disastrous attempt at combining the two activities, and his body going out partying too late.

Since he has no physical form that can be seen, he leads those condemned to the Total Perspective Vortex by humming various morose tunes so that the condemned can follow the sound of his voice.

Appears in:

Gargravarr was voiced on radio by Valentine Dyall - he appears in Fit the Eighth.

[edit] Garkbit

"If the lady and gentlemen would care to order drinks before dinner and the Universe will explode later for your pleasure."

Garkbit is the Head Waiter at Milliways, the impossible "The Restaurant at the End of the Universe". He is professionally unfazed by Arthur, Ford, Zaphod, and Trillian's unruly arrival, and has a fine sales-patter and very dry sense of humour.

Appears in:

In the radio series Garkbit is played by Anthony Sharp, and appears in Fit the Fifth. In the television series, he is portrayed by Jack May and appears in Episode Five.

The book describes Garkbit as being a methane breather, with a life support system strapped discreetly to his thigh.

[edit] Genghis Temüjin Khan

Son of Yesügei, Genghis Khan is both a distant ancestor of Mr Prosser and was called "a wanker, a tosspot, a very tiny piece of turd" by Wowbagger, the Infinitely Prolonged in "The Private Life of Genghis Khan", originally based on a sketch written by Adams and Graham Chapman. The short story also appears in some editions of The Salmon of Doubt.[3].

[edit] God

God, about to disappear in a puff of logic, from HitchHiker's TV series
God, about to disappear in a puff of logic, from HitchHiker's TV series

Aside from being the favourite subject of author Oolon Colluphid ("Where God Went Wrong", "Some More of God's Greatest Mistakes", "Who is this God Person Anyway" and "That About Wraps it Up for God"), God also makes a disappearance in the Guide's entry for the Babel Fish ("I refuse to prove that I exist," says God, "for proof denies faith, and without faith I am nothing". "But," says man "The Babel fish is a dead giveaway, isn't it? It could not have evolved by chance. It proves you exist, and so therefore, by your own arguments, you don't. QED.").

Majikthise worries about philosophers sitting up half the night arguing that there may or may not be a God if Deep Thought can give His phone number the next morning. Arthur, Fenchurch and Marvin visit God's Final Message to His Creation ("we apologise for the inconvenience") in So Long, and Thanks for All the Fish.

Four other characters have the status of a god: Almighty Bob, the Great Green Arkleseizure, Thor and Rob McKenna.

[edit] Gogrilla Mincefriend

An enterprising chap who addressed the problem of elevators refusing to operate because they had been afforded a degree of prescience (to facilitate their operation by allowing them to be waiting for you before you've even decided you want to go up or down a floor) but consequently became terrified of the future, and so taken to hiding in basements. Mincefriend became very wealthy when he patented and successfully marketed a device he had seen in a history book: the staircase.

[edit] Golgafrinchans

The Golgafrinchans first appear in Fit the Sixth of the radio series. In the novel series, their appearances are all in The Restaurant at the End of the Universe and in the television show, they appear in Episode Six. In all formats, the story is essentially the same. Following their adventures at Milliways, Arthur and Ford teleport onto an "Ark Ship" containing a number of Golgafrinchans. This particular group consists of the Wodehousian[4] "middle class" who have common, middle-management types of occupations. They were sent away from their planet under false pretenses by the (upper class) "thinkers" and (working class) "doers" of their society, who deemed them useless. They were told that the entire society had to move to a new planet, with a variety of thin excuses, and that it was necessary for them to go first to prepare the new planet for their occupation. However, it turns out that one of the middle-men was necessary for survival, and as a result, the rest of the Golgafrinchan society died off (see below).

[edit] Agda and Mella

Agda and Mella are Golgafrinchan girls that Arthur and Ford hit on. On Golgafrincham, Agda used to be a junior personnel officer and Mella an art director. Agda is taller and slimmer and Mella shorter and round-faced. Mella and Arthur became a couple, as did Agda and Ford. In a way Mella was very relieved because she had been saved from a life of looking at moodily lit tubes of toothpaste. Agda died a few weeks later from a chain of events that Ford unknowingly started by throwing the Scrabble letter Q into a privet bush: it startled a rabbit, which ran away and was eaten by a fox, who choked on the rabbit and died, contaminating a stream that Agda drank from and became sick - it is said that the only moral one could possibly learn from these occurrences is not to throw the letter Q into a privet bush. Agda and Mella only appear in the novel.

[edit] Captain

The Captain is the ablutophiliac captain of the Golgafrinchan Ark Fleet Ship B. He likes to bathe with his rubber duck (he spent practically the entire time he was captain of the B Ark and as much of his time on Earth, a total time of over three years, as has been documented in the bath) and has got a very relaxed attitude towards everything. The Captain also has a fondness for a drink called "jynnan tonnyx". His personality was based on Douglas Adams' habit of taking extraordinarily long baths as a method of procrastination to avoid writing.

He was voiced by David Jason in the radio series and by Frank Middlemass in the LP album adaptation. On television, it was Aubrey Morris.

[edit] Great Circling Poets of Arium

These rock throwing poets can be seen in the Guide graphics in the TV series, heard about in the Primary Phase and read about in the second novel. They are original inhabitants of Golgafrincham, one of whose descendants inspire the stories that caused the creation of the "'B' Ark" that Arthur and Ford find themselves on. The first part of their songs tell of how five princes with four horses from the City of Vassilian travel widely in distant lands, and the latter - and longer - part of the songs are about which of them is going to walk back.

[edit] Hairdresser

One of the Golgafrinchans on the prehistoric Earth, the hairdresser was put in charge of the fire development sub-committee. They gave him a couple of sticks to rub together, but instead, he made them into a pair of scissors in the radio series, or curling tongs in the television and book series.

He was played by Aubrey Woods in the radio series, by Stephen Grief in the LP album adaptation, and by David Rowlands on television.

[edit] Management consultant

The Golgafrinchans' management consultant tried to arrange the meetings of the colonization committee along the lines of a traditional committee structure, complete with a chair and an agenda. He was also in charge of fiscal policy, and decided to adopt the leaf as legal tender, making everyone immensely rich. In order to solve the inflation problem this caused, he planned a major deforestation campaign to effectively revalue the leaf by burning down all the forests.

He was played by Jonathan Cecil in the radio series, by David Tate in the LP album adaptation, and by Jon Glover on television.

[edit] Marketing girl

Another Golgafrinchan on prehistoric Earth, the marketing girl assisted the hairdresser's fire development sub-committee in researching what consumers want from fire and how they relate to it and if they want it fitted nasally. She also tried to invent the wheel, but had a little difficulty deciding what colour it should be.

She was played by Beth Porter both in the radio series and on television and by Loueen Willoughby in the LP album adaptation.

[edit] Number One

Number One is the First officer in the Golgafrinchan Ark Fleet Ship B. He is not very smart, having difficulty tying up his shoelaces, but is regarded by the captain as a nice chap. His only function to appear in the series is to offer Ford and Arthur drinks.

He was voiced by Jonathan Cecil in the radio series and by David Tate in the LP album adaptation. On television, the character was renamed Number Three and played by Geoffrey Beevers.

[edit] Number Two

Number Two is a militaristic officer in the Golgafrinchan Ark Fleet Ship B. He captures Arthur and Ford and interrogates them. When they land on Earth, Number Two declares a war on another, uninhabited continent. He likes shouting a lot, and thinks the Captain is an idiot. He had probably been employed as a security guard on Golgafrincham.

He is played by Aubrey Woods in the radio series and by Stephen Grief in the LP album adaptation. On television, the character was divided into two different characters: Number Two played by David Neville on the planet Earth, and Number One played by Matthew Scurfield on the B Ark.

[edit] Telephone Sanitizer

The telephone sanitizer is involved in the plot thread relating to the planet Golgafrincham in The Restaurant at the End of the Universe. Ironically, after all the telephone sanitizers were sent away with the rest of the "useless" Golgafrinchans, the rest of the society died off from an infectious disease contracted from an unsanitized telephone.

[edit] Great Green Arkleseizure

The creator of the universe, according to the people of Viltvodle VI. Their legend has it that the universe was sneezed out of the nose of the Great Green Arkleseizure, and they thus "live in perpetual fear of the time the call 'The Coming of the Great White Handkerchief.'"

The Jatravartid's God appears in the second novel, the TV series, and the movie.

[edit] Grunthos the Flatulent

Grunthos the Flatulent was the poetmaster of the Azgoths of Kria, writers of the second worst poetry in the universe, just between Paula Nancy Millstone Jennings and the Vogons.

The guide recites a tale of how, during a reading of his poem Ode To A Small Lump Of Green Putty I Found In My Armpit One Midsummer Morning, "four of the audience died of internal hemorrhaging and the president of the Mid-Galactic Arts Nobbling Council survived only by gnawing one of his own legs off."

Reportedly "disappointed" by the reception of his poem, Grunthos then prepared to read his 12-book epic, My Favourite Bathtime Gurgles (or Zen And The Art Of Going To The Lavatory in the TV series). He was prevented from doing so when his small intestine leapt up his neck and throttled his brain in a desperate bid to save civilization, killing him.

Excerpt from "Ode To A Small Lump Of Green Putty I Found In My Armpit One Midsummer Morning", taken from the TV series graphics:

Putty. Putty. Putty.
Green Putty - Grutty Peen.
Grarmpitutty - Morning!
Pridsummer - Grorning Utty!
Discovery..... Oh.
Putty?..... Armpit?
Armpit..... Putty.
Not even a particularly
Nice shade of green.

Excerpt from "Zen And The Art Of Going To The Lavatory", also taken from the TV series

Relax mind
Relax body
Relax bowels
Relax.
Do not fall over.
You are a cloud.
You are raining.
Do not rain
While train
Is standing at a station.
Move with the wind.
Apologise where necessary.

Appears in:

[edit] Guide Mark II

In the final novel, the Guide Mark II is created by the Vogons to help them destroy all the many Earths that appear in the novels. By using reverse temporal engineering throughout the book, the Guide Mark II - which takes on the appearance of a bird with Unfiltered perception - cajoles the cast to their final destination at Club Beta on Earth to first re-meet Agrajag and then be destroyed by the mindless Grebulons.

[edit] Hactar

Flexible and imaginative, Hactar was the first computer in which its individual components reflected the pattern of the whole, much like DNA in a biological organism. (See Jupiter Brain.) Hactar is made by the Silastic Armourfiends, who ask for an "Ultimate Weapon". Hactar, taking the request literally, builds a supernova bomb which would connect every major sun in the universe through hyperspace, thus making every star to go supernova. Deciding that he could find no circumstance where such a bomb would be justified, Hactar builds a small defect into it. After discovering the defect, the Armourfiends pulverize Hactar.

Over æons Hactar moves and recombines to become a dark cloud surrounding Krikkit, isolating the inhabitants. Deciding that the decision not to destroy the universe was not his to make, he uses his influence to make them build their first space ship and discover the universe; he then manipulates them into the same rage which the Armourfiends possessed, urging that they destroy all other life.

After an incredibly long and bloody galactic war, Judiciary Pag banishes Krikkit to an envelope of "Slo-Time" to be released after the rest of the universe ends. At the end of Life, the Universe and Everything, after his scheme fails, Hactar slips the cricket-ball-shaped supernova bomb to Arthur Dent, who then accidentally saves the Universe again by being an abysmal cricket bowler.

Appears in:

He is played on radio first by Geoffrey McGivern, in a flashback for which McGivern is not credited during Fit the Seventeenth. He is then voiced by Leslie Phillips, appearing again in Fit the Eighteenth.

[edit] Haggunenon Underfleet Commander

The Underfleet Commander reports directly to the Haggunenon Admiral. The admiral had gone off for a quick meal at Milliways, where Ford and Zaphod attempted to steal his/her/its/their flagship. But as it had a pre-set return course, it resumed its place at the front of a hundred thousand horribly weaponed black battle cruisers. Because the Haggunenons have very unstable DNA and change their shape/appearance at random and often inconvenient times, the Underfleet Commander mistakenly assumes that Zaphod and Trillian are, in fact, the admiral.

The Underfleet Commander only appears in Fit the Sixth, voiced by Aubrey Woods. The Haggunenons were written out of subsequent versions, as they were originally co-written with John Lloyd, although they did appear in some stage adaptations.

Haggunenons are greatly inconvenienced by their genetic instability and so have vowed to wage terrible war against all "filthy rotten stinking same-lings."

A similar creature appears on the BBC TV series Red Dwarf.

There is a shapeshifting Dungeons & Dragons monster called a "hagunemnon."

[edit] Happy Vertical People Transporters

The lifts in the fictional Hitchhiker's Guide offices are called Happy Vertical People Transporters. Another "product" of Adams's fictional Sirius Cybernetics Corporation, they are meant to be sentient enough to argue with and have "defocused temporal perception." The latter concept is meant to enable the lifts to see far enough into the future to arrive at a floor before a potential passenger realizes they wanted a lift, and thus remove any chatting, relaxing, and making friends people had to do whilst waiting for old-fashioned lifts.

The one lift with a voice appears in Fit the Seventh, voiced by David Tate. The lifts make a cameo appearance of sorts in The Quintessential Phase.

[edit] Hig Hurtenflurst

Hig Hurtenflurst "only happens to be" the risingest young executive in the Dolmansaxlil Shoe Corporation. During Fit the Eleventh, he is on Brontitall. What he is doing there is something of a mystery, as the Shoe Event Horizon was reached long ago and the survivors of the famine have long since evolved into bird people and set up home inside a fifteen-mile high statue of Arthur Dent. His foot-warriors capture Arthur Dent and three Lintilla clones, who are threatened by Hurtenflurst to be "revoked. K-I-L-L-E-D, revoked". He then proceeds to show them a film about the activities of the Dolmansaxlil Shoe Corporation, which is interrupted by Marvin, who has cut the power in order to rescue Arthur and the Lintillas.

He appeared in Fit the Eleventh of the original radio series, and was played by Marc Smith. He has not appeared in any versions after this.

[edit] Hotblack Desiato

A branch of Hotblack Desiato estate agents, after which the character was named, at Camden Town.
A branch of Hotblack Desiato estate agents, after which the character was named, at Camden Town.

Hotblack Desiato is the ajuitar keyboard player of the rock group Disaster Area, claimed to be the loudest band in the universe, and in fact the loudest sound of any kind, anywhere. So loud is this band that the audience usually listens from the safe distance of thirty seven miles away in a well-built concrete bunker. Disaster Area's lavish performances went so far as to crash a space ship into the sun to create a solar flare. Pink Floyd's lavish stage shows were the inspiration for Disaster Area. (Incidentally, Douglas Adams was credited for coming up with the title of Pink Floyd's 1994 album The Division Bell.) At the time when the main characters meet him, in The Restaurant at the End of the Universe, Hotblack is spending a year dead "for tax reasons", though he is still psychically alive.

The character is named after an estate agency based in Islington, with branches throughout North London; Adams said he was struggling to find a name for the character and, spotting a Hotblack Desiato sign, liked the name so much he "nearly crashed the car" and eventually telephoned to ask permission to use the firm's name for a character. Apparently, the firm's staff later received phone calls telling them they had a nerve naming their company after Adams's character.

The Disaster Area sub-plot was first heard in the LP album adaptations and later in The Restaurant at the End of the Universe. It replaces the Haggunenon material from the Fit the Sixth in the radio series. The character appears in episode five, and his ship in episode six of the TV series. He does not have any lines (due to being technically dead), and is played by Barry Frank Warren.

The B-side of the 7-inch single of the Hitchhiker's Guide TV Series theme music featured a performance of a song entitled Only The End Of The World Again, credited to 'Disaster Area'.

[edit] Humma Kavula

Humma Kavula is a semi-insane missionary living amongst the Jatravartid people of Viltvodle VI, and a former space pirate. (It was presumably during his time as a pirate that he lost his legs and had them replaced with telescoping mechanical spider appendages). He wears thick glasses, which make his eyes appear normal when worn; however, when he removes the glasses, he appears to have shrunken black pits where his eyes should be. He seems to be a religious leader on that planet, preaching about the Coming of the Great White Handkerchief. Hence, his sermons end with the words "Bless You' rather than "Amen". (See Jatravartids).

He also ran against Zaphod Beeblebrox in the campaign for President of the Galaxy with the campaign slogan "Don't Vote For Stupid," but lost, and has remained bitter about it ever since. In the film he is seeking the point-of-view gun to further his religion's acceptance (presumably), and he takes one of Zaphod's two heads as hostage to ensure his help.

The character was created by Adams exclusively for the 2005 movie. Quoting Robbie Stamp: "All the substantive new ideas in the movie, Humma, the Point of View Gun and the "paddle slapping sequence" on Vogsphere are brand new Douglas ideas written especially for the movie by him."