Champagne for my real friends, real pain for my sham friends
"Champagne for my real friends, real pain for my sham friends" is a chiastic quote often attributed to the Irish painter Francis Bacon or the American musician Tom Waits, but which is a toast dating to at least the nineteenth century. It may also refer to:
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- "Mr. Jorrocks then called upon the company in succession for a toast, a song, or a sentiment. Nimrod gave, 'The Royal Staghounds'; Crane gave, 'Champagne to our real friends, and real pain to our sham friends.'" Jorrocks's Jaunts and Jollities (1838), ch. 12, R. S. Surtees
- An episode from the third season of the TV show One Tree Hill.
- Champagne for My Real Friends, Real Pain for My Sham Friends, the ninth track on the album From Under the Cork Tree by Fall Out Boy, the title of which is this entire quote
- A repeated line used in the song "This One's for You" by Therapy? on their 2001 album, Shameless
- A line that Edward Norton's character says in the 2002 Spike Lee drama 25th Hour
- Mike Cross wrote this line in his song, "Dear Boss" on the album Solo at Midnight released in 1985.
- A line from the 1961 television series Thriller, season 1, episode 16, titled "The Hungry Glass" based on a story written by Robert Bloch. The line is delivered as a toast by actor Russell Johnson
- A line said by the character Marnie, in the show Girls season 5 episode 6
- Series 4 episode 6 of British TV show Fresh Meat. JP and his brother Tomothy quote this phrase while drinking champagne.
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