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Theatrical release poster
Directed by Mark Griffiths
Produced by Jeff Begun
Written by Eric Alter
Steve Greene
Mark Griffiths
Music by Vic Caesar
Cinematography Tom Richmond
Edited by Andy Blumenthal
Distributed by Columbia Pictures
Release dates
  • May 11, 1984 (1984-05-11)
Running time
88 minutes
Country United States
Language English
Budget less than $2 million[1]

Hardbodies is a 1984 sex comedy film about three middle-aged men who hire a younger man to help them pick up women at the beach. The film was directed by Mark Griffiths, and stars Grant Cramer, Courtney Gains, and Gary Wood. It was followed by a 1986 sequel entitled Hardbodies 2.


The movie opens with some rhythmic singing to a black screen showing credits, then showing why the singing is present as it fades in: the rhythmic singing matches the pace of the back of a man under a blanket moving up and down as he is having sex in the missionary position with an attractive young woman. Sated, he stops, and rolls over, quite satisfied with his performance, and the woman (whose name we discover later is Kristi), also apparently quite pleased with it as well, snuggles up next to him, when their post-coital reverie is interrupted by banging on the door. We discover the man, whose name is Scotty Palmer, has been interrupted by his landlord to inform him he has to get out because he has been evicted for non-payment of rent.

We discover that Scotty is a con man who does whatever he can to get along. He soon finds three older divorced men who have a lot of money, however they do not have a trait that Scotty possesses, moxie with women. They agree to let Scotty stay with them at their beach house (and pay him $600 a month), if he returns the favor by teaching them how to pick up women.

Scotty shows them how to "dialog" women by giving them a dose of the old BBD (Bigger and Better Deal). Along this journey, Scotty loses his playboy ways and falls in love with Kristi. Kristi, knowing Scotty's playboy past, puts up with his ups and downs early on in the movie but later insists that he change his ways. Scotty recognizes that Kristi is ultimately more important than the empty life he has led up until now and changes his ways.


  • Grant Cramer as Scotty Palmer
  • Courtney Gains as Rag
  • Gary Wood as Hunter
  • Darcy DeMoss as Dede
  • Cindy Silver as Kimberly
  • Sorrells Pickard as Ashby
  • Kristi Somers as Michelle
  • Michael Rapport as Rounder
  • Teal Roberts as Kristi
  • Roberta Collins as Lana
  • Crystal Shaw Martell as Candy


The film was originally made for broadcast on the Playboy Channel but Columbia picked it up for theatrical distribution.[1]

Pop culture[edit]

Referenced in the season 4 Gilmore Girls episode, "The Fundamental Things Apply."

Platinum-selling all-female glam metal band Vixen make their first recorded appearance on the movie's soundtrack with six songs and also appear in the movie as the band Diaper Rash. The line-up features Janet Gardner (vocals) and Jan Kuehnemund (guitar) from the classic Vixen line-up, guitarist Steve Vai's wife Pia and two others.

Referenced in the season 5 Entourage episode "The All Out Fall Out". A rival agent of Ari Gold finds a topless photo of Gold's wife, stating that it is from a (fictional) movie called "Hardbodies 3".


  1. ^ a b FILM CLIPS: 'ZELIG' GIVES WILLIS SHOT AT AN OSCAR London, Michael. Los Angeles Times (1923-Current File) [Los Angeles, Calif] 02 Mar 1984: h1.

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