How Do You Want Me?

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How Do You Want Me?
Created bySimon Nye
StarringDylan Moran
Charlotte Coleman
Country of originUnited Kingdom
Original language(s)English
No. of series2
No. of episodes12
Running time30 minutes
Original networkBBC Two
Original release24 February 1998 (1998-02-24) –
22 December 1999 (1999-12-22)

How Do You Want Me? is a British television sitcom, produced by Kensington Films & Television, written by Simon Nye, and directed by John Henderson.


Dylan Moran starred as boy next door Ian Lyons, who recently eloped with country girl Lisa Yardley (Charlotte Coleman). At the show's start, after a year living in London they move to the village of Snowle, where her intimidating father (Frank Finlay) breeds turkeys. He and most of Lisa's family (which included Emma Chambers as her sister and Peter Serafinowicz as her thuggish brother) take a dislike to Ian, and much of the comedy comes from how Ian copes with life with her family and village life in general. Life is also complicated by Lisa's ex-boyfriend Derek (Mark Heap), who still loves her.

The series' title is a reference to the trade Ian takes up within the village, buying the business of the local photographer despite having no formal training in photography (he had previously managed a comedy club in London). Photography plays an important part within the stories; the beginning of series one shows Ian and Lisa outside a country church having wedding photos taken; this is then shown to be a staged event arranged by Lisa's family due to their unhappiness at them eloping and marrying abroad prior to the series starting. Ian first realises the extent of the family's hatred for him when he witnesses Lisa's mother cutting him out of the wedding pictures at the end of the first episode. Further episodes also have photography playing a key role, including an episode where nude photos of Lisa get circulated around the village after her brother and his friends discover them. Another episode sees Lisa's sister approach Ian for a photo shoot, and her disappointment when he is unable to photograph her looking glamorous and beautiful. There is a running joke throughout the series of Ian wanting to make a book of photographs of country fire stations in Britain.

Season Two ends with Ian and Lisa sitting in their car debating whether to leave the village; Ian cannot bear to live there any more due to the aggression shown by Lisa's family to him but Lisa does not want to live in London.



There were two series of How Do You Want Me?, broadcast in 1998 and 1999, each with six episodes.

Series 1[edit]

The first series was broadcast at 10pm on Tuesdays, from 24 February until 31 March 1998.

  1. No One Can Hear You Scream
  2. Floppy But Not Too Floppy
  3. Monstrous
  4. Woof!
  5. The Hidden World of Country Fire Stations
  6. Sausage, Balloon, Bum

Series 2[edit]

The second series was broadcast at 10pm on Wednesdays, from 10 November until 22 December 1999.

  1. White Pubic Hair
  2. I'm Not An Alcoholic
  3. Nude Modelling Module
  4. Bad Builders
  5. Ready Steady Kill
  6. The Pleasures of Village Life

Media releases[edit]

"How Do You Want Me?: The Complete Collection" was released on DVD in the UK on 3 July 2006.

In 2010, The Guardian ranked the serial at number 16 in their list of "The Top 50 TV Dramas of All Time".[1]


External links[edit]