It Might as Well Be String

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"It Might as Well Be String"
The Goodies episode
Episode no.Series 6
Episode 5
Original air date19 October 1976
(Tuesday — 9.10 p.m.)
Guest appearance(s)
Episode chronology
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"Black and White Beauty"
Next →
"2001 & A Bit"
List of The Goodies episodes

"It Might as Well Be String" is an episode of the award-winning British comedy television series The Goodies.

Written by The Goodies, with songs and music by Bill Oddie.


The Goodies have become Advertising Men and Graeme reads from a blackboard with the letters 'A', 'B', 'C' and 'D' written on it, and showing what is written about each letter — from 'D' to 'A'):

  • D is for 'Dumb' — (housewives – bless them)
  • C is for 'Clever'
  • B is for 'Brilliant'
  • A is for 'Advertising men'

Tim ('TBT') tells the others: "From today 'BO', 'GG' — save time — call you 'BOGG'."

Bill & Grahame are in charge with creative sides, Tim is horrified at the lies they tell about the products they advertise mainly cruel and offence adverts which made to threaten and bully housewives. He wants them to advertise truth, because he is of the opinion that truth is the miracle ingredient of honesty but Bill and Grahame finds Tim's opinion is a complete rip-off. After the downfall of the sale figures The Goodies came up with other product options and Tim suggested string, Bill and Grahame agreed that String is pure.

Later, Tim watches his favourite television programme Tomorrow's World, and is again horrified — this time because string is a failure as a product. Then he discovers that some mysterious men are making a lot of money by keeping a stockpile of string, so that the world is dependent on them. When he attempts to discuss the situation with Graeme and Bill, he finds that they have gone, and left replicas of themselves to fool him. Tim also learns that Graeme and Bill are the men behind the scheme. Tim is furious and intends to put Graeme's and Bill's string empire out of business. However, along the way he runs into many obstacles — including Bill and Graeme, themselves.

Song written by Bill Oddie[edit]

  • "Everybody Loves String" — sung by Bill, Tim and Graeme

Cultural references[edit]

  • Tomorrow's World
  • Mr Kipling's "exceedingly good" Cakes ads
  • Manikin cigars ads
  • 1970s Milk Tray ads
  • Hai Karate after shave ads (the original star of these ads, Valerie Leon, is in the Goodies episode)
  • Captain Birdseye fish finger ads
  • Minced Morsels dog food ads with Clement Freud
  • The inevitable Heinz Baked Beans boy adverts (seen in previous series of The Goodies)

DVD and VHS releases[edit]

This episode has been released on DVD.


  • "The Complete Goodies" — Robert Ross, B T Batsford, London, 2000
  • "The Goodies Rule OK" — Robert Ross, Carlton Books Ltd, Sydney, 2006
  • "From Fringe to Flying Circus — 'Celebrating a Unique Generation of Comedy 1960-1980'" — Roger Wilmut, Eyre Methuen Ltd, 1980
  • "The Goodies Episode Summaries" — Brett Allender
  • "The Goodies — Fact File" — Matthew K. Sharp

External links[edit]