List of Cosby episodes

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The episodes for the CBS television sitcom Cosby aired from September 16, 1996 to April 28, 2000, with 96 total produced spanning four seasons.

Season 1 (1996–1997)[edit]

No. in
No. in
Title Directed by Written by Original air date Prod. code
1 1 "Pilot" John Whitesell Story by : David Renwick
Teleplay by : Dennis Klein
September 16, 1996 (1996-09-16) 101
Corporate downsizing forces Hilton Lucas into an unplanned retirement. Hilton must watch Shelly the turtle.
Guest star: Sean Whalen (Dry-cleaner clerk)
2 2 "It's My Party" John Whitesell David Landsberg September 23, 1996 (1996-09-23) 102
Hilton expects a retirement surprise party from his former employer.
Guest stars: Gerry Gibson (Bob), Harvey Vernon (Mr. Stevens); Co-stars: Carlos Lacamara (Carlos), Ellen Albertini Dow (Mrs. DiNovio), and Brent Hinkley (Frank).
3 3 "Neighborhood Watch" John Whitesell Vanessa Middleton September 30, 1996 (1996-09-30) 103

Crime-fighter Hilton goes overboard.

Guest stars: Tom Mardirosian (Buddy), Danton Stone (Plumber), Rosemary De Angelis (Sidra); Co-stars: Alice Drummond (Mrs. Bagley), Lisa Louise Langford (Car lady), John Scurti (Brown coat man), Skipp Sudduth (Phil).
4 4 "Happily Ever Hilton" John Whitesell Adam Belanoff October 7, 1996 (1996-10-07) 104

Hilton tries to get his old job back.

Guest stars: Klea Scott (Nurse Suzanne Cratchet), Joe Zaloom (Screaming patient); Co-stars: Zach Grenier (Fruit stand patron), Allison Janney (Podiatry nurse), José Ramón Rosario (Hit-and-run), Tony Sirico (Teddy Coo-Coo).
5 5 "The Best Little Antique Shop in Astoria" John Whitesell David Wyatt October 14, 1996 (1996-10-14) 105
Hilton takes a job at an antiques store but doesn't know there's a secret brothel in the back.
6 6 "One Foot in Your Mouth" John Whitesell Saul Turteltaub & Bernie Orenstein October 21, 1996 (1996-10-21) 106
Hilton gets caught in his own lie when he tries to get out of attending a wedding.
Guest stars: Richard Libertini (Dave), Marian Seldes (Elaine); Co-stars: Rona Figueroa (Kim), Michael Goldfinger (Norman), Aida Turturro (Norman's wife).
7 7 "Natural Born Debtors" John Whitesell Vanessa Middleton October 28, 1996 (1996-10-28) 107
Hilton tries to help Pauline's overly sensitive, financially irresponsible goddaughter.
Guest stars: Meredith Gordon (Wendy O'Brien), Marcia Jean Kurtz (Gladys), Peter Jay Fernandez (Mr. Carter).
8 8 "The Two Mr. Lucases" John Whitesell Adam Belanoff November 4, 1996 (1996-11-04) 108
Because of a hospital mixup, Hilton gets the colonoscopy that was meant for his cousin.
Guest stars: Míriam Colón (Lillian Lucas), Karen Shallo (Nurse Angela), Gerry Bamman (Dr. Martin), Jerry Mayer (Coffee machine repairman?); Co-stars: Joan Buddenhagen (mean nurse), Harry Jefferson (Earl Lucas).
9 9 "No Nudes Is Good Nudes" John Whitesell David Landsberg and David Wyatt November 11, 1996 (1996-11-11) 109
Hilton helps the nude model from his art class.
Guest stars: Edward Hibbert (Mr. Woodhall), Jernard Burks (Model's husband), Shari Headley (Model).
10 10 "Basketball Story" John Whitesell Frank Mula November 18, 1996 (1996-11-18) 110
Lucky basketball ticketholder Hilton will win $1 million if he can make a free throw.
Guest stars: Howard David (Sports announcer), Penny Hardaway (Himself), Jennifer Lewis (Bernice), Ed Wheeler (Leon); Co-stars: Dalia Fayed (Rochelle), Richard Ziman (Million-dollar announcer)
11 11 "Guard Almighty" John Whitesell Saul Turteltaub & Bernie Orenstein November 25, 1996 (1996-11-25) 111

Security guard Hilton deals with a robber and the Yankees.

Guest stars: David Cone (Himself), Ray Girardin, Harry Murphy, Joe Torre (Himself); Co-stars: Patti Karr, Ranjit Chowdhry (Mr. Singh), Rebecca Creskoff, Arthur Nascarella (Frank Volpicella)
12 12 "The Broken Reflection" John Whitesell Dennis Klein December 2, 1996 (1996-12-02) 112

Hilton's brother (Roscoe Lee Brown) is in town for an honorary degree.

Guest star: Roscoe Lee Brown (George Lucas); Co-star: Ping Wu (Happy Memories photographer).
13 13 "Tempus Lucas" John Whitesell John Rogers December 16, 1996 (1996-12-16) 113

Hilton hits the gym a little too hard while trying to get in shape for a physical examination. Guest stars: Ranjit Chowdhry (Mr. Singh), Keith Reddin (Mr. Acker), Robert Stanton (Insurance salesman)

Featuring: Clark Terry (Gym trainer)
14 14 "Guess Whose President Is Coming to Dinner" John Whitesell David Landsberg January 6, 1997 (1997-01-06) 114

Hilton calls a radio talk show and gets invited to dine with the President.

Guest stars: Ranjit Chowdhry (Mr. Singh), Rudy Giuliani (Himself), Anthony Heald (Benjamin Dean); Co-stars: Michael Dellafamina (Homeless man), Anthony Heald (President's aide)
15 15 "Brave New Hilton" John Whitesell Elise Allen January 13, 1997 (1997-01-13) 115

Hilton helps when a buddy's goose-feather business is down.

Guest stars: Jerry Becker (Rupert Macy), Julius Carry (Bradshaw Kinsy), Ranjit Chowdhry (Mr. Singh), Penny Johnson (Penny Bradshaw),
16 16 "Lucas Platonicus" John Whitesell John Rogers and Chris Downey February 3, 1997 (1997-02-03) 116

Hilton attempts satellite-dish installation. After pursuing Erica for 10 years, Griffin decides to finally give up.

Guest stars: Daryl "Chill" Mitchell (Mike Julien), Al Espinosa (Jeff)
17 17 "Valentine's Day" John Whitesell Howard Meyers February 10, 1997 (1997-02-10) 117
When Hilton realizes that he has bought Ruth a scarf for Valentine's Day that she already has, he panics and tells her he bought tickets to see singer Jeffrey Osborne.
18 18 "Florida" John Whitesell Frank Mula February 17, 1997 (1997-02-17) 118

A blizzard convinces Hilton and Ruth to move to Florida. Guest stars: Audrie J. Neenan (Mrs. Balaban), Lynn Cohen (Dorothy), Frank Vincent (Dorothy's husband);

Featuring: Norm Lewis, Said Sayrafiezadeh (Store owner)
19 19 "Anniversary Waltz" John Whitesell Robert Kurtz & Eric Brand February 24, 1997 (1997-02-24) 119

Hilton tries to get Ruth's wedding band engraved to renew their wedding vows.

Guest stars: Lisa Nicole Carson (Tina), Earle Hyman (Reverend Mitchell), Marc John Jefferies (Davey)
20 20 "That Darn Cat" John Whitesell Garfield! March 3, 1997 (1997-03-03) 120

Erica moves back to live with Hilton and Ruth, bringing Sherman the cat, while a discarded positive pregnancy test then has everyone jumping to conclusions.

Co-stars: Joseph D'Onofrio (Video-store clerk), Linda Powell (Stephanie)
21 21 "I'm OK, You're Hilton" John Whitesell Adam Belanoff March 10, 1997 (1997-03-10) 121

Hilton has a wonderful time giving advice to his therapy group. Guest stars: Frankie R. Faison (Ron Edwards), Siobhan Fallon (Therapist); Co-stars: Tony Darrow (Bartender), Jackie Hoffman (Ellen McAfee), Marc John Jefferies (Davey);

Featuring: Garry Pastore (Police officer), Hardy Rawls (TV announcer)
22 22 "The Return of the Charlites" John Whitesell Vanessa Middleton April 28, 1997 (1997-04-28) 122

Ruth gets a chance to be in the spotlight when her superstar friend comes to town.

Special guest star: Patti LaBelle as Charlene
23 23 "My Dinner with Methuselah" John Whitesell Elise Allen and Chris Downey May 5, 1997 (1997-05-05) 123

Ruth arranges a blind date for Pauline, while Hilton advises Griffin about impressing his sophisticated girlfriend. Guest star: Peter Jacobson (Richard);

Featuring: Red Buttons (Otto Tibbles)
24 24 "Hilton's Playland" John Whitesell Story by : Nina Combs
Teleplay by : Richard Goodman & Jacqueline R. McKinley
May 12, 1997 (1997-05-12) 124

Erica's TV-producer boyfriend regrets giving Hilton a job on a children's show.

Special guest star: Tim Conway (Happy Clock – Happy); Guest star: Darryl M. Bell (Julius)
25 25 "Social Insecurity" John Whitesell Vanessa Middleton May 19, 1997 (1997-05-19) 125

Hilton must correct Social Security's notion that he is dead. Guest stars: Marcia Jean Kurtz (Social Security clerk), James F. Murtaugh (Mr. Benjamin), Keith Smith (Mr. Brathwaite), Robert Stanton (Mr. Acker);

Featuring: Teddy Coluca

Season 2 (1997–1998)[edit]

No. in
No. in
Title Directed by Written by Original air date Prod. code
26 1 "About My Life" John Whitesell David Landsberg September 15, 1997 (1997-09-15) 201

Erica and Griffin move into the Lucas household, tensions rise in the house, and a preschools opens next door.

Guest star: Judy Reyes as Preschool teacher – Miss Reyes
27 2 "Wake Up and Smell the Coffeehouse" John Whitesell Robert Kurtz & Eric Brand September 22, 1997 (1997-09-22) 202

Hilton brings coffee and cookies to the struggling flower shop and hits pay dirt.

Guest star: Stewart Steinberg
28 3 "The Rules" John Whitesell Vanessa Middleton September 29, 1997 (1997-09-29) 203

When Hilton realizes that Griffin and Erica's friends are taking over his house by watching his television and eating all his food, he decides that if they live in his house, Griffin and Erica will have to live by his rules. Reluctantly, Griffin and Erica agree to abide by Hilton's strict new set of house rules, including Rule #5: thou shall not alloweth men upstairs. So when Erica's boyfriend, Julius (guest star Darryl M. Bell, reprising the role), shows up in her bedroom, Erica attempts to keep it a secret from her father. Meanwhile, Hilton is busy on a mission to kill a stray mouse – although Julius mistakenly believes that he is the target of Hilton's assassination plans.

Wood Harris appears in this episode.
29 4 "Two Cents" John Whitesell Chris Downey October 6, 1997 (1997-10-06) 204
When Griffin's non-stop eating starts to get on Hilton's nerves, and Hilton's non-stop opinion-giving begins to get to Griffin, the two challenge each other to a 24-hour contest to see which man has more self-control. Meanwhile, Ruth, Erica and Pauline decide that if they have to put up with the men's nonsense, they are going to have a little fun at their expense. And fun they have as they make Griffin suffer watching them eat a three-course meal of his favorite foods and Hilton agonize as he watches Erica walk out the door for a Las Vegas weekend getaway with Julius!
30 5 "Older and Out" John Whitesell Adam Belanoff October 13, 1997 (1997-10-13) 205
Hilton is overjoyed when he meets new friends Chuck and Larry and joins their "Older and Out" team, since he's also older and he's "out" keeping busy. Ruth discovers that Chuck is gay, and she mistakenly believes that her husband of more than 30 years may have feelings for a man! Blaming herself for letting the spark go out of the marriage, Ruth sets off to win him back before a surprised Hilton discovers the real meaning of "Older and Out."
31 6 "Lucas Smartypantsicus" John Whitesell John Rogers October 20, 1997 (1997-10-20) 206
Pauline is absolutely thrilled that after years of being the single friend, she has finally become a couple with her new boyfriend, Gregory, a self-absorbed, self-proclaimed genius who disturbs Hilton. So when she decides to dump him because he's too uptight, Ruth thinks that Hilton is really the one to blame and sends him off to remedy the situation. But when Hilton, Griffin and Gregory team up at The Steinway Street Pub, they end up good buddies, and big, big winners too, in a trivia game.
32 7 "The Last Man Standing" John Whitesell Tom Purcell & Tyrone Finch October 27, 1997 (1997-10-27) 207
A doctor places Hilton under strict quarantine after he catches the stomach flu. Griffin warns Hilton not to escape quarantine, but he doesn't listen and, one by one, everyone in the household drops, leaving Hilton to don his nurse's uniform. As he runs from sickbed to sickbed tending to his patients' needs, Hilton discovers that the members of his household are not at their best when they are sick – but he's determined to maintain his excellent bedside manner.
33 8 "Dating Games" John Whitesell Charleen Easton November 3, 1997 (1997-11-03) 208

Ruth's obnoxious sister-in-law Debra (Debbie Allen) brags continually about her daughter's wedding plans;

Guest stars: Busta Rhymes, Rhonda Ross Kendrick
34 9 "The Pilot (Not the Pilot)" John Whitesell Saul Turteltaub & Bernie Orenstein November 10, 1997 (1997-11-10) 209
Hilton and Griffin find themselves aboard a plane with a deranged passenger (William Shatner).
10 35 "Lucas Raymondicus" Don Scardino John Rogers November 17, 1997 (1997-11-17) 210
In a crossover with Everybody Loves Raymond, Frank Barone (Peter Boyle) has been telling his son Ray Barone (Ray Romano) about sinking the winning shot in the 1955 Queens championship since the day he was born. So when Frank pleads with Hilton to help him save face with his son by lying for him, Hilton reluctantly agrees. But then Gwendolyn Brooks High plans a ceremony honoring Frank – and he tells the school that Hilton can't come because he is dead – Hilton decides that enough is enough and goes forward to set the record straight.
36 11 "Shall We Dance?" Don Scardino Tom Purcell & Tyrone Finch November 24, 1997 (1997-11-24) 211
Ruth gives reluctant Hilton tap-dancing lessons for his birthday.
37 12 "The Two Hilton Lucases" John Whitesell Chris Downey December 15, 1997 (1997-12-15) 212
Hilton and Griffin get jobs as telemarketers, hoping to win a fabulous office prize, a weekend for two at The Plaza Hotel in Manhattan. Hilton is afraid to tell his wife, knowing she will disapprove of his new job. Instead, he lies and claims that his new job is driving Danny Aiello's limo. Griffin tries to improve his sales record by taking Hilton's advice to create a new persona – he pretends to be Hilton. So when Ruthie overhears "Hilton Lucas" on a sexy phone call, she thinks that her husband is having an affair and blames the whole thing on his new employer, Aiello.
38 13 "A Team of His Own" John Bowab Charleen Easton January 5, 1998 (1998-01-05) 213

Hilton and Ruth coach opposing basketball teams.

Co Stars: Zelda Harris (Fireflies forward – Nicki), Keith Franklin (Warriors hungry boy – Chewy), Jason Fuchs (Warriors scared boy – David), Kevin Rahsaan Grant (Warriors hypochondriac – Jamaal), Kym Hampton (herself), Teesa Weatherspoon – (herself), Tatyana Bass, Vyacheslav Bokhman (Grove boy with Russian circus), Steve Feldman.
39 14 "Brazil" Don Scardino Robert Kurtz & Eric Brand January 12, 1998 (1998-01-12) 214
When the city closes down the Flower Cafe because of a misplaced vent, Pauline suggests that she and Ruth indulge in a pampering weekend at a spa. Hilton's only assignment while she's gone is to get the vent fixed. Carla. the chaperone of a Brazilian girls' choir, asks to rent out the coffee shop for a small get-together, and Hilton hesitantly agrees. After all, Pauline and Ruth are out of town and what could possibly go wrong?
40 15 "Old Yeller" John Bowab Vanessa Middleton January 19, 1998 (1998-01-19) 215
Despite Ruth's insistence that family and friends should never work together, Hilton goes to work for Griffin narrating children's stories. He just can't refuse the temptation for some creative rewriting, and Hilton puts his own spin on some classic kids' tales. Will he have his poetic license revoked? Meanwhile, Pauline is so captivated by the handsome young man temporarily working at the coffee shop that she can't bring herself to fire him.
41 16 "Out to Launch" Don Scardino Saul Turteltaub & Bernie Orenstein February 2, 1998 (1998-02-02) 216
Hilton is bequeathed a boat by a wealthy man he once helped at the airport. Despite Ruth's insistence that he doesn't have the stamina or the money to support a boating hobby, Hilton persists – including spending three days on the boat with Griffin, parked outside the house in the freezing cold.
42 17 "Fifteen Minutes of Fame" Don Scardino David Landsberg February 23, 1998 (1998-02-23) 217
While Hilton is working at the coffee house, he meets Rob Burnett and Paul Shaffer from the Late Show with David Letterman. He talks them into letting him be on the show.
43 18 "Mud" Don Scardino David Blum March 2, 1998 (1998-03-02) 218
A plate that Hilton made as a gift for Ruth has been switched for one made by a famous abstract artist. It is worth some $15,000, and now, thanks to Pauline, it is missing.
44 19 "Enter Lucas" Don Scardino Adam Belanoff March 9, 1998 (1998-03-09) 219
Pauline tries her hand at playwriting for a course she's taking at the community center. Following Hilton's advice about writing about something "real," she turns out a thinly-disguised comedy about the Lucas family. Hilton is the only one who can't see who the lead character is based on – until he volunteers to play the part on stage. Broadway veteran Philip Bosco is Pauline's flamboyant playwriting teacher, who casts Hilton in her comedy as a sarcastic, irascible coot.
45 20 "1040 Not-So-EZ" Don Scardino Temi Akinyemi April 6, 1998 (1998-04-06) 220
It's April 15th and Hilton hasn't even started working on his taxes, a fact he wants to make sure Ruth doesn't discover. Ruth has other things on her mind, however – she and Pauline have an appointment with Mr. Rollins of the SBA to obtain another loan for the Flower Café. At the Café, Erica has agreed to look after Jurnee, her friend's younger sister. A desperate Hilton arrives and asks Erica for help with his taxes, but she reminds him she's a lawyer, not an accountant. Meanwhile, Mr. Rollins, very negative and skeptical, says he needs to see Ruth's and Pauline's personal tax returns before they can proceed. Ruth calls Hilton for their tax information, and he promises to get everything to her in an hour. Erica sends Jurnee over to the house to watch TV, where it shortly becomes clear that the little girl knows more about doing taxes (her dad's an accountant) than Hilton. She gets the taxes wrapped up and over to Ruth, Pauline and Mr. Rollins, and Hilton is saved.
46 21 "Men Are from Mars Women Are from Astoria" Arthur Lewis Vanessa Middleton and John Rogers April 27, 1998 (1998-04-27) 221
Erica and her girlfriends, unable to find "Mr. Right," take Ruth's advice about changing their dating habits and set out on "The Great American Manhunt." As the girls despair about their single state, Ruth tries to explain that men are like old cars – you've just got to find one that works, and if you take care of it long enough, eventually it will be worth something! Taking her advice, the ladies set out in search of the guy least likely to turn into a lemon.
47 22 "On the Rocks" Don Scardino Norman Steinberg May 4, 1998 (1998-05-04) 222
When Ruth and Hilton have a major fight they assess the changes in their lives.
48 23 "Love Intervention" Don Scardino Chris Downey May 11, 1998 (1998-05-11) 223
The Lucases play cupid for smitten Griffin.
49 24 "The First Gentleman" Don Scardino Tyrone Finch & Tom Purcell May 18, 1998 (1998-05-18) 224

Ruth is President of the Businessmen's Roundtable, and Hilton the Ladies auxiliary. In a rather surreal cold open, Hilton speaks with a long dead Jack Benny via special effects.

Tony Bennett also appears in this episode.

Season 3 (1998–1999)[edit]

No. in
No. in
Title Directed by Written by Original air date Prod. code
50 1 "Now Is the Time, the Walrus Said" Don Scardino Tom Straw September 21, 1998 (1998-09-21) 301
Hilton's new responsibility, looking after 11-year-old Jurnee while her dad is at work, becomes a little too hot to handle when Jurnee asks him a complicated question about the birds and bees. Not wanting to interfere in Jurnee's upbringing, and looking for a way to avoid having to answer himself, Hilton suggests that the curious Jurnee go to her dad for an explanation. No matter how difficult it is for Del to face the fact that Jurnee is growing up (perhaps a bit faster than he had hoped), with coaching from Hilton, he finally appears ready to have 'the talk.'
51 2 "Do Not Overheat" Don Scardino Dan Wilcox September 28, 1998 (1998-09-28) 302
Griffin and Erica work out a financial deal to move into Griffin's house on a landlord-tenant basis – thus giving Hilton and Ruth back their privacy ? only to have Griffin's house accidentally burn to the ground. Hilton's visions of spending romantic evenings alone with Ruth are over before they've even begun. And, when Erica and Griffin realize that everything destroyed in the fire was either borrowed, rented or on loan, they decide it's time to grow up and start taking "ownership" of their lives.
52 3 "Chemistry" Don Scardino Adam Belanoff October 5, 1998 (1998-10-05) 303
Hilton is devastated to learn that Erica is breaking up with her latest boyfriend, Gil (David Alan Grier) – a handsome, well-educated jazz musician who is everything that Hilton could ever want in a guy and more. When Erica and Gil mutually decide to call it quits, it is Hilton who takes the news the hardest, since he has developed his own meaningful relationship with Gil – primarily because he represents the jazzman Hilton always wanted to be. How will Hilton go on? All he does is sit by the phone and wait for Gil to call! It's true that break-ups can be hard – but usually for the two people involved.
53 4 "Lucas Discordia" Don Scardino John Rogers October 12, 1998 (1998-10-12) 304
Petty differences about irritating personal habits threaten to escalate into a major brawl when Ruth and Pauline plan a "girls' night out" in Manhattan, and Hilton insists on acting as their chauffeur.
54 5 "The Greatest Gift" Don Scardino Vanessa Middleton October 19, 1998 (1998-10-19) 305
A major argument erupts when Ruth accidentally discovers that Erica has been hiding all the gifts she has given her over the years. When Ruth confronts Erica about only pretending to like the gifts that Ruth put so much time and care into buying, it sparks the disagreement. On the one hand, Ruth feels that she does not know her own daughter, and on the flip side, Erica feels that her mother doesn't bother to learn about her likes and dislikes. Although Hilton desperately wants to stay out of their argument, he is left with no alternative and attempts to coerce the women into a joint shopping trip. The goal – buy something that is pleasing to them both without driving him over the edge.
55 6 "Lucas Matriculus" Don Scardino John Rogers October 26, 1998 (1998-10-26) 306
When Griffin accompanies Hilton to "Grandparents Day" at Jurnee's school and adds his two cents to the science lesson, it quickly becomes apparent that he is a natural at teaching and holding the kids' interest. Who would have thought?? Hilton is thrilled that Griffin has uncovered a talent for this most noble profession, while Erica is more than ticked off when she learns that Griffin achieved a higher GPA than she did in college. At first resistant to the idea of working hard for little pay and loads of responsibility, Griffin is ultimately swept up with the idea of molding the minds of America's young – heaven help them.
56 7 "Playground Scar" Don Scardino Tom Reeder November 2, 1998 (1998-11-02) 307
After Jurnee expresses her fondness for schoolmate Kevin and he retaliates by shoving her on the school playground, amateur psychologist Hilton explains his theory of how "playground scarring" can affect a woman for life. According to Hilton, when women are unable to trust, unable to commit, their problems can always be traced back to a bad playground experience when they were deeply humiliated by a boy they liked. To this day, Ruth has problems with trust because of a certain Kenneth P. Watson, who purposely teetered when he should have tottered, requiring a young Ruth to get stitches. When it comes to Jurnee, however, Hilton is determined not to have history repeat itself.
57 8 "The Episode Episode" Don Scardino Adam Belanoff November 9, 1998 (1998-11-09) 308
Hilton is sentenced to a life without pork chops, barbecue ribs and bacon when a doctor's visit reveals a too-high cholesterol count. A mouth-watering meal for Hilton now consists of tofu, steamed broccoli and "not-wurst" imitation hot dogs. New Jersey Nets player Jayson Williams guest stars as Jurnee's teacher, who adds his two-cents on the subject of Hilton's eating habits.
58 9 "Judgment Day" Don Scardino Tom Purcell & Tyrone Finch November 16, 1998 (1998-11-16) 309

Hilton's steaming when a klutzy customer spills coffee on her dress, admits it's her own fault – and then sues the Flower Cafe for $3,000.

Guest star: Kevin James makes a cameo appearance as Doug Heffernan, from the sitcom The King of Queens.
59 10 "Turkey Day" Don Scardino Dan Wilcox November 23, 1998 (1998-11-23) 310
When Hilton offers to make Jurnee's Thanksgiving Day Parade turkey costume from scratch, it comes out to be just that... a turkey of a costume. So imagine Hilton's joy when the queen of domesticity, Martha Stewart, shows up at the coffee shop bearing the most realistic looking turkey outfit that anyone's ever seen and leaves it behind by mistake. But, when Martha Stewart returns asking if anyone has seen the costume, will Hilton's guilt get the best of him... or will Jurnee be the best-dressed turkey in the parade?
60 11 "This Old Friend" Don Scardino Tom Purcell & Tyrone Finch December 14, 1998 (1998-12-14) 311
Hilton becomes nervous when, after a two-year silence, he hears from an old friend who only makes contact when he needs a handout.
61 12 "The Awful Truth" Don Scardino Vanessa Middleton January 11, 1999 (1999-01-11) 312
Del's new girlfriend, Karen, agonizes over a secret that she is worried about sharing with him: the youth who passes as her kid brother is actually her son.
62 13 "Refrigerator Logic" Don Scardino Tom Purcell & Tyrone Finch January 18, 1999 (1999-01-18) 313
Hilton is beyond frustrated when his newly purchased state-of-the-art refrigerator breaks down and he can't get any customer satisfaction. His repeated attempts to reach a human customer service representative fail, and then he's told it will take an eternity to get the necessary refrigerator part. Hilton takes matters into his own hands and becomes a one-man consumer crusader.
63 14 "Lucas Absentia" Don Scardino J.J. Paulsen and John Rogers January 25, 1999 (1999-01-25) 314
Griffin contemplates quitting the teaching profession when his first day as a substitute teacher is a disaster. The Lucases lend themselves out as mock students so that Griffin can practice his teaching techniques on them – although their misguided attempt to help might just turn him off teaching forever.
64 15 "False Alarm" Don Scardino Mark Legan February 1, 1999 (1999-02-01) 315
After the Lucas home is burglarized, Hilton invests in a security system – only to discover that the thief is someone he knows.
65 16 "A Very Nice Dance" Don Scardino J.J. Paulsen February 8, 1999 (1999-02-08) 316
Hilton and Ruth recall their first date many years ago. Their flashbacks are done through animated sequences, and of course, both of them have widely different versions of what happened.
66 17 "Ol' Betsy" Don Scardino Nick LeRose February 15, 1999 (1999-02-15) 317
While searching for a rare part for his beloved turntable, Hilton bumps into an old friend from his bachelor days, Fred. When Hilton and Fred start reminiscing about how they double-dated sisters Mattie and Roberta Singleton, Hilton decides to play matchmaker and prompts Fred into learning whatever became of Mattie. Even now, years later, Fred can't help wondering what might have happened if they remained a couple... and, thanks to Hilton, he may finally get a chance to find out.
67 18 "Afterschool Delight" Don Scardino Adam Belanoff, Tom Purcell and Tyrone Finch February 22, 1999 (1999-02-22) 318
Jurnee is aghast when she finds out that her dad intends to date the "meanest" teacher at her school. Del is so troubled by Jurnee's reaction to his interest in Ms. Malone that he is ready to call off their date. But Hilton reminds him that almost every person can remember a teacher who was too strict, gave too much homework or expected too much of a student – and usually ended up being the one who made the greatest impact on the student later in life.
68 19 "Will Power" Don Scardino Dan Wilcox March 1, 1999 (1999-03-01) 319
Hilton is attempting to help Jurnee with her "Romeo and Juliet" homework assignment when his true feelings about The Bard come out: Why couldn't Shakespeare simply speak in plain English rather than using all of that fancy, confusing language? Alas, Shakespeare showeth up in the Lucas kitchen to tutor Hilton personally. Will it be "all's well that ends well?"
69 20 "Lucas Illuminus" Don Scardino John Rogers March 17, 1999 (1999-03-17) 320

Hilton volunteers as a reader for a retired, blind English literature professor and, upon realizing his gift for teaching, urges him to return to the classroom.

Guest star: Anthony Quinn as Professor Christo, whose failing eyesight and advanced age caused him to leave behind the profession he loves so much.
70 21 "Timerity" Don Scardino Tom Straw April 5, 1999 (1999-04-05) 321
Hilton is caught in the middle when his curmudgeonly friend, Tim, stages a rent strike against his landlord.
71 22 "The Party's Over" Don Scardino Vanessa Middleton April 26, 1999 (1999-04-26) 322
Hilton is stunned when 11-year-old Jurnee, left in his care while her father is away, returns from a friend's birthday party drunk. Hilton and Ruth are adamant about finding out who spiked the birthday punch and caused several of the children to awaken to wicked hangovers the following morning. But, Jurnee is not budging for fear that she will be labeled a squealer among her friends. Hilton is determined to make Jurnee understand that protecting the guilty person is sometimes just as bad as being guilty yourself.
72 23 "The Vesey Method" Don Scardino Bill Boulware May 3, 1999 (1999-05-03) 323
When Griffin finds himself face to face with the group of tough, unmotivated students, he struggles to find a way to reach them and open their minds to the wonders of learning – something fellow teacher Mr. Fleming lost enthusiasm for a long time ago.
24 73 "He Who Hesitates Is Lucas" Don Scardino Nick LeRose May 10, 1999 (1999-05-10) 324
When Hilton and Ruth hear that their "little girl" is getting married, they couldn't be happier for her, or themselves, since this would mean one less person in their crowded house. Erica's intentions, however, are for the newlyweds to remain in her parent's house indefinitely to save some money. Are Hilton's tears of joy or sorrow?
74 25 "War Stories" Don Scardino Tom Reeder May 17, 1999 (1999-05-17) 325
Griffin's trust in his new girlfriend Anita is put to the test when her job as a conference planner puts her smack in the middle of a young millionaires' convention, on the season finale. Rather than heeding Hilton's advice to give Anita some space, Griffin decides to pop in on the convention and find out for himself how loyal Anita is – which prompts Hilton to reminisce about the anxious time he spent away from Ruth, soon after they first met, agonizing over whether or not she was thinking of him as often as he was of her. "Prequel Monday" kicks off with an animated flashback sequence of Hilton as an enlisted Navy man.

Season 4 (1999–2000)[edit]

No. in
No. in
Title Directed by Written by Original air date Prod. code
75 1 Don Scardino Tom Straw September 29, 1999 (1999-09-29) 401
Hilton falls asleep during an I Spy marathon. He dreams that he and his old partner Kelly Robinson have been put on a new case in Hong Kong. However, Erica keeps interrupting Hilton's dream to discuss her wedding preparations. The rest of the cast play parts in the dream.
76 2 "The Wedding" Don Scardino Nick LeRose October 6, 1999 (1999-10-06) 402
Hilton has to pay the wedding organizers for their services as Erica's wedding nears, but Ruth is more concerned with why the bride is not falling apart yet.
77 3 "Book 'Em, Griff O" Don Scardino J.J. Paulsen October 13, 1999 (1999-10-13) 403
Hilton urges Griffin to do something to replace his school's outdated textbooks, and Erica and Darien return from their honeymoon.
78 4 "Lucas Apocalypse" Don Scardino John Rogers October 20, 1999 (1999-10-20) 404
When Griffin tries to prepare for Y2K by installing a generator, he causes a premature blackout for the entire neighborhood.
79 5 "A Teacher's Life" Don Scardino Matt Karis October 27, 1999 (1999-10-27) 405
Getting through a typical day is hard enough, but it becomes an ordeal for Griffin when everyone demands his time on the day he is preparing for a date with a beautiful flight attendant.
80 6 "There's Something About Hilton" Don Scardino Nick LeRose November 3, 1999 (1999-11-03) 406
A strange woman comes to the shop under the impression that Hilton is her husband, Charlie.
"Superstar" Don Scardino Nick LeRose and Tom Reeder November 17, 1999 (1999-11-17) 407
Griffin has a dream in which teachers are given the same elite status and salary as professional athletes or actors.
83 9 "The Parent Trap" Don Scardino Matt Karis December 15, 1999 (1999-12-15) 408
Erica visits a student's home to get his mother more involved in his education.
84 10 "One for the Books" Don Scardino Tom Reeder December 22, 1999 (1999-12-22) 409
Ruth and Pauline try to help save a friend's failing bookstore by annexing it to the Flower Cafe.
85 11 "Loving Madeline" John Whitesell J.J. Paulsen December 29, 1999 (1999-12-29) 410
The cast presents a heartfelt tribute to Madeline Kahn, with clips highlighting her character Pauline Fox.
86 12 "The Hilton Hilton" John Whitesell Kriss Turner January 14, 2000 (2000-01-14) 411
Darien's late arrival to an important family dinner causes a fight between Hilton and Ruth.
87 13 "Chilly Scenes of Winter Golf" Don Scardino Tom Purcell & Tyrone Fitch January 21, 2000 (2000-01-21) 412
When Ruth teaches Erica how to play golf, a rivalry begins between the two women that even extends to cooking.
88 14 "To Catch a Thief" Don Scardino Matt Karis and Becky Mode January 28, 2000 (2000-01-28) 413
Hilton finds himself in the middle of a bank heist.
89 15 "Raising Paranoia" Don Scardino Tom Straw March 3, 2000 (2000-03-03) 414
Griffin, Erica and Darien try to convince a drug-addicted friend to enter rehab.
90 16 "It's a Wonderful Wife" John Whitesell Story by : Tom Straw
Teleplay by : Tom Reeder
March 10, 2000 (2000-03-10) 415
For a school paper, Keisha discovers intriguing facts about Ruth's past.
91 17 "Perfect Valentine" John Whitesell Karen Maser March 31, 2000 (2000-03-31) 416
Griffin's inability to deal with the return of his estranged father, who abandoned him 15 years earlier, causes problems in his relationship with Rebecca.
92 18 "A Pair of Threes Beats a Flush Every Time" Don Scardino Tom Straw April 7, 2000 (2000-04-07) 417
Hilton discovers that a former high school buddy is now homeless.
93 19 "Thursday's Child" John Whitesell Tom Purcell & Tyrone Finch April 14, 2000 (2000-04-14) 418
A foster child in Erica's class wants to move in with the Lucases.
94 20 "Kids Eat the Darndest Things" John Whitesell Kriss Turner April 14, 2000 (2000-04-14) 419
Griffin tries to encourage both his students and the Lucases to eat healthier foods.
95 21 "A Long Night's Journey" Don Scardino Sean Francis April 21, 2000 (2000-04-21) 420
Hilton suffers from insomnia for several days, falling asleep during the day at inopportune moments, causing Erica and Ruth embarrassment. When Hilton refuses to attend a sleep clinic, Griffin offers to set up a video camera in the Lucas' bedroom to record the night's activity to find the cause of Hilton's sleeplessness. The next morning, when the family gathers to watch the tape, no one is more surprised than Ruth to see that it is her snoring and kicking Hilton in her sleep that keeps him awake.
96 22 "The Song Remains the Same" Don Scardino Nick LeRose April 28, 2000 (2000-04-28) 421
Hilton passes his advice along to Erica and Darien on how to keep the romance alive in marriage.