Return of Techno-Destructo

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Return of Techno-Destructo
Return of Techno-Destructo.jpg
Video by Gwar
Released 1996
Genre Thrash metal, punk rock
Length 90 min
Label Slave Pit, Inc.
Gwar chronology
Skulhedface (1994)String Module Error: Match not foundString Module Error: Match not found Return of Techno-Destructo
Rendezvous with RagNaRok (1997)String Module Error: Match not foundString Module Error: Match not found

Return of Techno Destructo is another Slave Pit VHS release. There has been some confusion because the name of the tape released in 1996 is also the name of the 1991 short film that is contained within. There were two version of this tape released (both in 1996) - the only difference in the second one was that some editing minor mistakes were corrected.

  1. "Hunter Jackson intro"
  2. "Opening credits" (Power Rangers theme)
  3. "Techno vs. Tarantulina"
  4. "Gwar Must Be Destroyed" (Film (1986))
  5. "Gwar Theme" (Live 1988)
  6. "Techno Song" (Live 1989)
  7. "U Ain't Shit" (Live 1989)
  8. "Cool Place to Park" (Live 1989)
  9. "Years Without Light" (Live 1992)
  10. "Gilded Lily" (Live 1992)
  11. "Horror of Yig" (Live 1992)
  12. "Voodoo Summoning" (Live 1992)
  13. "Captain Crunch" (Live 1992)
  14. "Private Pain of Techno Destructo" (Live 1992)
  15. "Gor Gor" (Live 1992)
  16. "Return of Techno Destructo" (Film (1991))
  17. "Surf of Syn" (Video)

1. Intro: Hunter Jackson introduces himself as Techno Destructo

2. Opening credits: clips from the video played over Power Rangers Theme

3. Techno vs. Tarantulina: linking the various clips of the video together are scenes of Techno fighting Tarantulina, a blonde female Scumdog (who is built like one of the American Gladiators) who has been sent to earth by the Master to execute Techno for failing to capture Gwar. As he fights her, he explains his story.

4. Gwar Must Be Destroyed film (1987): A very early film from Gwar with Joey Slutman on vocals. Techno explains his mission to find his fellow Scumdogs, Gwar, and return them to the Master to fight in his war, but the decadent rock n roll lifestyle has corrupted them and they refuse to go, leading to the inevitable fight with Techno. Very early lineup of the band plays here, and Joe can be heard singing on versions of Americanized, U Ain't Shit, and Gwar Theme that can be found on Let There Be Gwar. The costumes are very rudimentary, so it is hard to tell some of the characters apart. Also watch for the giant Antarctic Ant, the evisceration of the Pink Unicorn, and original manager Sluggo P Martini.

5. Gwar Theme (live 1988): another early live song. Dave is now on vocals, with the mask-less costume similar to Hell-o! No Beefcake yet, but from the clips it's hard to tell who is on bass. Also on stage is a crude early attempt at Gor Gor who just stands there and flops his mouth open. Cardinal Syn also makes a brief appearance, but looks more like one of the Disciples of Syn as seen in later shows. The old Gwar Woman is also seen in this clip.

6. Techno Song (live in LA 1989): you've probably seen a variation of this one before- Techno comes out and demand that Gwar join him and the Master in their holy jihad, etc... Gwar refuses and fights Techno, who grabs Oderus' head (now in full mask) and rips out and eats his brain.

7. U Ain't Shit (live in LA 1989): Just when our heroes are about to be defeated, Slymenstra comes out and save the day, beating the shit out of Techno with a big mace.

8. Cool Place to Park (live in LA 1989): As Beefcake gets his time in the spotlight, Slymenstra beats and humiliates Techno.

9. Years Without Light (AMBD "Slave Revolt" Tour 1992): Gwar unleashed the fury of the Crapapult on the crowd, flinging pile of ca-ca in your general direction. An enslaved Techno (sans power arm) betrays his new masters and tries to turn the Crapapult against them.

10. Gilded Lily (AMBD "Slave Revolt" Tour 1992): To repay him for trying to escape, Slymenstra again beats and humiliates Techno, then showers him (and the crowd) with her menstrual flow. Nice close-ups of her blood-spraying crotch.

11. Horror of Yg (AMBD "Slave Revolt" Tour 1992): Slymenstra does her fire dance.

12. VooDoo Summoning (AMBD "Slave Revolt" Tour 1992): Slymie continues the fire dance as slaves dance around with African masks and shields. They haul out the body of Satan and beat him up.

13. Captain Crunch (AMBD "Slave Revolt" Tour 1992): Hiding atop the stage, Techno builds mind control helmets and puts them on the slaves. Then they bring him... the new and improved power arm!

14. Techno Song (AMBD "Slave Revolt" Tour 1992): New version of song includes new verses and other sections. Once again, Techno beats the shit out of Oderus and the Sexecutioner. When Slymenstra comes to save the day, she finds herself powerless against the powerful new arm. As a last-ditch effort, Oderus attempts to summon...

15. Gor Gor (AMBD "Slave Revolt" Tour 1992): But as the gigantic tyrannosaurus appears we find out that Techno has got to him first turning him into the cybernetic Gor Borg. But Slymie takes the giant remote control from Techno and turns his creation against him, and Gwar emerge triumphant.

16. The Return of Techno Destructo film (1991): Defeated by Gwar and wiped of his memory, Techno Destructo is stripped of his arm and working as a cab driver. But when three annoying groupie chicks ask him to drive them to a Gwar show, his memory is triggered. He drives them to a dump and after one of them runs him over with his cab and tries to kill him, he strangles her, and then discovers his power arm in the trunk. His memory now reawakened, he attempts to contact Cardinal Syn to join him to battle Gwar. But Syn sends his nuns to fight Techno, and then joins the battle himself, leaving a defeated Techno in a bloody heap. Background music includes Hell-o! versions of Rock N Roll Party Town and World O Filth, the Live From Antarctica version of Techno Song, and an easy-listening keyboard version of the Cardinal Syn Theme.

17. Surf of Syn video (1995): A worthy sequel to the Gor Gor video, which until now has been Gwar's finest moment on film. Cardinal Syn is coming to earth with his nuns and disciples, so Gwar, assisted by Techno, steals a NASA launching pad and flies into space to meet him head on. They fight his disciples who abandon ship on surf rockets and fly to earth. Gwar steal some rockets and fly back to earth to fight a giant Syn, who crushes the city amid stock footage from Godzilla movies. Techno crashes Syns crucifix ship into his chest, but his disembodied head escapes and flies away. This video packs a lot of action into a short clip, and is a mini-epic all to itself.

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