Reverse psychology is a technique involving the assertion of a belief or behavior that is opposite to the one desired, with the expectation that this approach will encourage the subject of the persuasion to do what actually is desired. This technique relies on the psychological phenomenon of reactance, in which a person has a negative emotional reaction to being persuaded, and thus chooses the option which is being advocated against. This may work especially well on a person who is resistant by nature, while direct requests works best for people who are compliant. The one being manipulated is usually unaware of what is really going on.
The psychology professor John Gottman advises against using reverse psychology on teens, with the presumption that they will rebel, stating that "such strategies are confusing, manipulative, dishonest, and they rarely work".
Reverse psychology is often used on children due to their high tendency to respond with reactance, a desire to restore threatened freedom of action. Some parents feel that the best strategy is sometimes "reverse psychology": telling children to stay in the house when you really want them to choose to go outside and play.[not in citation given] Questions have however been raised about such an approach when it is more than merely instrumental, in the sense that "reverse psychology implies a clever manipulation of the misbehaving child" and nothing more.[vague]
Closely associated with reverse psychology in psychotherapy is the technique of "the Paradoxical intervention....This technique has also been called 'prescribing the symptom' and 'antisuggestion'". The therapist frames their message so that resistance to it promotes change.
Such interventions "can have a similar impact as humor in helping clients cast their problems in a new light....By going with, not against, the client's resistance, the therapist makes the behavior less attractive". This is referred to as reframing. This means pretending to agree with clients thoughts and beliefs; to reaffirm them out loud to make the clients themselves realize their fallibility.
We value people and things unavailable to us - things we can't have. A common complaint men have about women is that they are attracted to men with a disagreeable personality. However, this is no less true about men's attraction towards women. Showing signs of confidence and independence is attractive for both sexes. Dating coach Neil Strauss says "The dating dichotomy isn't actually between nice guys and mean guys or good guys and bad guys. It's between weak guys and strong guys. Women are drawn to men who demonstrate strength—not necessarily physical strength, but the ability to make them feel safe."
The reason we want to be with emotionally abusive and unavailable people is because of unresolved issues from the unconscious mind. Being emotionally unavailable to your partner will damage the health of a long-term romantic relationship.
"In a world where it is expected that all things should be available ... less availability" has emerged as a new selling point: "by engaging in such a restricted anti-marketing ploy the brand has won kudos". The result can be "what the Japanese call a secret brand ... no regular retail outlets, no catalog, no web presence apart from a few cryptic mentions ... people like it because it's almost impossible to find". Such an example of a brand catering to the customers exquisite taste is Cayce Pollard's "The Gabriel Hounds".
Adorno and Horkheimer
Theodor Adorno and Max Horkheimer characterized the effect of the culture industry as "psychoanalysis in reverse". Their analysis began with the dialectic which operated in Germany when heirs of the Romantic movement became seekers of "Strength through Joy", only to have their movement co-opted by a combination of the mass media and National Socialism. A modern example begins with the "fitness and jogging" boom in the United States in the 1970s. The "running craze" at the Boston Marathon and in California, dialectically, was the thesis that one did not have to be "Rocky" in a sweaty gym to be physically fit, and that body acceptance was the key to effective aerobic training. The culture industry responded to the thesis with major advertising campaigns from Calvin Klein and others, using images featuring exceptionally toned models. People compared themselves to these models, which created a sense of competition, and many high school students avoid jogging because of the resultant body shame.
The culture industry mass-produces standardized material. This would not be dangerous if the material was meaningless, but it frequently offers and reinforces ideals and norms representing implied criticism of those who fail to match up. Empirical studies show that mass culture products can lower confidence and self-esteem, and cause humiliation among men and women whose particular characteristics fall outside the normalised range for appearance, behaviour, religion, ethnicity etc. Similarly, advertising frequently seeks to create a need to buy by showing differences between actual and ideal situations. The intention is usually to induce dissatisfaction with the present situation, and to induce expectations of satisfaction through the acquisition of products which will transform the actual reality into the idealized reality. Hence, if the peer group buys, all those who cannot afford the products will feel additional unhappiness and frustration until they eventually join the group. Thus, sometimes the process of advocacy for the one outcome really intends to produce the opposite outcome as the motivation for purchase.
However, more often than not, the cause and effect is unintended. Marxist logic applied to the culture industry indicates that it is, per se, a dialectic in which declining profit margins and increasing costs make investors anxious for "sure things". Repeating winning formulas and stereotyping create the lowest common denominator products with the lowest costs. But the less creative the input, the more likely it becomes that roles will be cast in ways which match, rather than challenge, common prejudices which can inadvertently (or quite deliberately) damage the esteem of those in the marginalized groups.[page needed]
In popular culture
Classic examples of reverse psychology in popular culture include a large, bright red button with a sign next to it saying "Do not push", or a sign saying "Jump at your own risk".
There are numerous examples of reverse psychology in fiction, cinema, and cartoons, including William Shakespeare's Julius Caesar where Mark Antony uses reverse psychology to get the town's people to cause a riot. Mark Anthony pretends to side with Brutus by complementing on his deeds which have led to Caesar's murder, while actually inciting the crowd's anger.
In one of Joel Chandler Harris's Uncle Remus stories, Br'er Rabbit escaped from Br'er Fox by repeatedly pleading "Please, Br'er Fox, don't fling me in that briar patch." "The fox did so, which allowed the rabbit to escape: The Rabbit used 'reverse psychology' to outsmart the Fox."
In Edgar Allan Poe's The Cask of Amontillado, Montresor uses reverse psychology to persuade Fortunato to enter his vaults. He says that Fortunato is too tired and should get some rest and that he should find someone else to help him with his wine tasting problem. Montresor knew that Fortunato would disagree and insisted on entering the vault, leading him into his death by immurement.
The Swedish fictional character Alfie Atkins uses reverse psychology in the children's book You're a Sly One, Alfie Atkins! from 1977. He exaggerates his own childishness in order to convince his older cousins to sit at the grown-up table.
In the 1992 Disney film Aladdin, the titular character, upon freeing the Genie from the lamp, uses reverse psychology to trick the Genie into freeing him from the Cave of Wonders, without using one of his 3 wishes to do so.
- Reverse Psychology. Changingminds.org. Retrieved on 2018-09-30.
- "Do You Use "Reverse Psychology"? Stop Right Now!". Psychology Today. Retrieved 2018-09-22.
- Elena N. Malyuga; Svetlana N. Orlova (14 November 2017). Linguistic Pragmatics of Intercultural Professional and Business Communication. Springer. p. 71. ISBN 978-3-319-68744-5.
- Susan Fowler (30 September 2014). Why Motivating People Doesn't Work . . . and What Does: The New Science of Leading, Energizing, and Engaging. Berrett-Koehler Publishers. p. 32. ISBN 978-1-62656-184-7.
- John Gottman, The Heart of Parenting (London 1997) p. 21, p. 179 and p. 212
- Eliot R. Smith/Diane M.Mackie, Social Psychology (Hove 2007) p. 380
- R. J. Delaney/K. R Kunstal, Troubled Transplants (2000) p. 81
- Gerald Corey, Theory and Practice of Counselling and Psychotherapy (1991) p. 155
- R. F. Baumeister/B. J. Bushman, Social Psychology and Human Nature <2007) p. 467
- Corey, p. 385 and p. 155
- When All Else Fails,Try Reverse Psychology!. Psychology Today. Retrieved on 2018-09-30.
- Welch, Duana C. (May 2018). "Why Women Love Jerks, & Why You Should Be a Nice Guy Anyway | harmony Advice". Eharmony.com. Retrieved 2018-09-28.
- "5 Reasons Men Date the Wrong Women-And What They Can Do To Turn it Around | Articles at". Keen.com. Retrieved 2018-09-28.
- Christian Carter (2016-04-18). "Why Men Love Women with an Attitude". Zoosk.com. Retrieved 2018-09-28.
- Strauss, Neil (29 September 2011). "1". The Game and Rules of the Game. Canongate Books. p. 424. ISBN 978-0-85786-387-4.
- About the Author. "The Lure of the Unpredictable Lover". Psychology Today. Retrieved 2018-09-28.
- Indrajit Sinha/Thomas Foscht, Reverse Psychology Marketing (2007) p. 156
- William Gibson, Zero History (London 2010) p. 45-6 and p 72
- Tom Henthorne (13 June 2011). William Gibson: A Literary Companion. McFarland. p. 137. ISBN 978-0-7864-8693-9.
- Adorno, Theodor W. Negative Dialectics Continuum International Publishing Group; Reprint (1983) ISBN 0-8264-0132-5 (Reference for entire section Adorno and Horkheimer)
- Horkheimer, Max, Adorno, Theodor W. & Cumming, John the (Translator) Dialectic of Enlightenment (Reference for entire section Adorno and Horkheimer)
- "How did Antony convince the crowd in his funeral oration to seek revenge in Julius Caesar by William Shakespeare?" eNotes, 5 Dec. 2012, https://www.enotes.com/homework-help/what-rhetorical-tactics-does-anthony-use-win-back-376363. Accessed 30 Sep. 2018
- Madelyn Jablon, Black Metafiction (1999) p. 100
- Sanford Pinsker (1990). Bearing the Bad News: Contemporary American Literature and Culture. University of Iowa Press. p. 141. ISBN 978-1-58729-190-6.
- "Små och stora äventyr med Alfons Åberg".
- Gerald R. Weeks, Promoting Change through Paradoxical Therapy (1991)