* Senior club appearances and goals counted for the domestic league only.
† Appearances (Goals).
Rudolf "Rudi" Assauer (born 30 April 1944 in Sulzbach-Altenwald) is a former German football manager and player. Due to his habit of smoking a great number of cigars, he has been given the nickname "Stumpen-Rudi", or "Cheroot Rudi".
Born in Saarland, Assauer played in 307 matches for Borussia Dortmund and SV Werder Bremen between 1964 and 1976. From 1976 to 1981 he remained the general manager of Werder Bremen, before leaving to work as a general manager for FC Schalke 04 for the first time between 1981 and 1986 (he was the head coach in 1981). This first tenure ended with his dismissal, and Assauer spent four years out of football and went into real estate. He re-entered management in 1990, and in 1993 he once again became the general manager (not a coaching position) at Schalke.
Since taking over for the second time, Schalke have seen much success, including a 1997 UEFA Cup win, and victory in the German Cup in 2001 and 2002. Assauer has also overseen the development of a brand new stadium for the club. Schalke are however experiencing considerable financial problems at present. In May 2006 Assauer was suspected of betraying secret information concerning the financial problems of Schalke, and the club and Assauer have parted company. As of February 2009, he is a player agent. His agency Assauer Sportmanagement AG represents, among others, Marc-André Kruska, Stefan Wächter, Sun Xiang and Pekka Lagerblom.
Assauer lived until January 2009 with the actress Simone Thomalla, and has been described by Michael Meier, former manager of Borussia Dortmund, as a "Kashmir Hooligan".
In 2010, he was quoted as saying there was no place in football for gays.
On 31 January 2012, Assauer confirmed media reports that he, still only 67, is suffering from Alzheimer's disease.