Scotland (The Goodies)

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The Goodies episode
Episode no.Series 2
Episode 1
Original air date1 October 1971
(Friday — 9.20 p.m.)
Guest appearance(s)
Episode chronology
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"Radio Goodies"
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"Commonwealth Games"
List of The Goodies episodes

"Scotland" is an episode of the award-winning British comedy television series The Goodies.

This episode is also known as "The Loch Ness Monster".

Written by The Goodies, with songs and music by Bill Oddie.


The Goodies find a man about to commit suicide by jumping off a bridge and talk him out of doing so. It turns out that the man is the zookeeper in charge of in the brand new Monster House at the London Zoo who is depressed because he does not have a monster exhibit to put into it. The zookeeper mentions that he used to be the keeper in charge of the Snowdon Aviary at the zoo.

Tim, Bill and Graeme decide to go to Scotland, where they hope to be able to catch the Loch Ness Monster for the zookeeper to put into the Monster House. When they arrive in Scotland, they shop for supplies to help them catch the monster, and the tourism agent makes them spend a lot of money by selling them a huge number of assorted supplies for the job.

They hunt for Haggis, which runs away from them, and Tim is put into danger by the venomous Bagpipes spider. Later, when Tim sets up to fish for the Loch Ness Monster, he finds it difficult to use the enormous fishing rod as well as having difficulty with the huge number of supplies which he has purchased to bait the hook of the fishing line. Graeme and Bill are also experiencing problems with their purchase of heavy diving suits and diving helmets. Descending into the depths of Loch Ness, Bill and Graeme discover that Tim is also there. Tim, who has not bought a diving suit, is holding his breath, an umbrella and a huge egg which he has purchased from the tourism agent (who has another shop at the bottom of Loch Ness). Graeme and Bill realise that it has all been a scam and, advising Tim to leave the giant-size egg behind, they discard their heavy diving gear to go to the surface of Loch Ness. It is there they find what they have been looking for, as the Loch Ness Monster surfaces slowly under them.

The Goodies are delighted at their find, and set about taking their quarry home with them to Cricklewood — where they discover something very unusual about their captive Loch Ness Monster.

Cultural references[edit]


  • "The Complete Goodies" — Robert Ross, B T Batsford, London, 2000
  • "The Goodies Rule OK" — Robert Ross, Carlton Books Ltd, Sydney, 2006
  • "From Fringe to Flying Circus — 'Celebrating a Unique Generation of Comedy 1960-1980'" — Roger Wilmut, Eyre Methuen Ltd, 1980
  • "The Goodies Episode Summaries" — Brett Allender
  • "The Goodies — Fact File" — Matthew K. Sharp

External links[edit]

("Scotland" is listed under an alternative title at IMDb)