Self-denial (also called self-abnegation and self-sacrifice) refers to altruistic abstinence – the willingness to forgo personal pleasures or undergo personal trials in the pursuit of the increased good of another. Various religions and cultures take differing views of self-denial, some considering it a positive trait and others considering it a negative one. According to some Christians, self-denial is considered a superhuman virtue only obtainable through Jesus. Some critics of self-denial suggest that self-denial can lead to self-hatred and claim that the self-denial practiced in Judaism has created self-hating Jews.
Religion and self-denial
Religion plays a big part in the act of self-denial. Self-denial in the Christian belief is a positive thing because it is supposed to help people reach happiness and become a true follower of Christ. In Christianity, self-denial is the act of refusing to do your own will and to one day reach his presence. Self-denial requires rejecting desires of the flesh and leading a holy path. You receive the greatness of God first then you are made aware of your nothingness. In the end, self-denial becomes impossible without this fuller revelation of God. Christian belief of self-denial comes from Jesus not only implying it through words but from action. Just how he sacrificed himself, one should sacrifice our life for him. Self-denial is practiced by those who want to reach the blessings of God by renouncing ungodly and worldly passions that come from our own desires.
Self-denial based on sex
Self-denial in women is linked to cultural definitions of femininity which women have internalized to such an extent that self-abnigation had become basic to women's experience. Judith Plaskow observed this and argued that it was more linked to women then men because they were to follow this Christian virtue because of their detriment. Women are seen in a domestic perspective and self-denial puts all things women were once exposed to to the side so they can be committed to their marriage and family. The way women are portrayed hasn't changed much throughout the years because the patriarchal perspective continues to be present. Through self-denial women have to sacrifice their interests and goals to satisfy not only family, but many times social norms. They are not allowed to be independent but more so are trapped to be the individual they are expected to be. However, in men, this is different. Masculinity is linked to self-denial when put in a male perspective. Men's self-denial is both a source of men's existential alienation and part of the infrastructure of men's power. When men go through self-denial it is interpreted as self improvement as put by the book Manliness (book) in which they emphasize self-denial as a comparison to the image of the goal of Superman in "What does not kill me makes me stronger.""
Self-denial involves an avoidance and holding back of happiness and pleasurable experiences from oneself that is only damaging to other people. It is a form of microsuicide because it is threatening to an individual's physical health, emotional well-being, or personal goals.  The individual gives up interests and doesn't feel excited about their life because they are committed to pursuing happiness in something else. It is a potential sign of suicide if this self-denial becomes extreme because by giving up desires and goals in life the individual becomes to self-destruct themselves as a whole and even those surrounding them. Especially in families self-denial can become an impediment to happiness because it constantly evokes disputes. It can especially affect children when they have a self-denial parent because it tends to push children away then later feel guilt for leaving them behind. Self-denial can become a repetition in children that are presented with this and to future generations. It affects everyone that surrounds a person with self-denial because it limits individuals from fully developing and causes those to feel angry or guilty. It decreases honest communication amongst families because of the fact that those going through self-denial don't understand the harm they do to others.
- Arthur I. Waskow (1991). Seasons of our Joy: A Modern Guide to the Jewish Holidays. Boston: Beacon Press. p. 31. ISBN 0-8070-3611-0. Retrieved September 2, 2011.
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- Victor Seidler (1991). Recreating Sexual Politics(Routledge Revivals):Men, Feminism, and Politics. New York: Routledge. p. 37. ISBN 978-0-415-57289-7.
- Harvey C. Mansfield (2006). Manliness. New York: Yale University Press. p. 115. ISBN 978-0-300-10664-0.
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- Robert I. Yufit; David Lester (2005). Assessment, Treatment, and Prevention of Suicidal Behavior. New Jersey: Wiley. p. 210. ISBN 978-0-471-27264-9.