Talk:John Bowstead

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Article restructure.[edit]

Restructuring sentences and paras for easier read and flow. Removing superfluous words and phrases. Adding links and italics.

The article was a bit of a jumble; there was cumbersome phraseology that made for a stumbling read. In re-shaping to make crisper and more encyclopedic, I may have mis-aligned some facts, especially where I made educated guesses at the drift of sentences.

I have removed the reference to Ruskin. Ruskin wasn't a Head of Visual and Performing(!) Arts; he was not a head of anything. He was a teacher of drawing and gave art lecturers, and was the focus for a group of artist teachers who gravitated to the College through his influence... nothing more, but good enough. The first person who might be said to be a Head of Art (Director of Art Classes) for a structured department was James Laver in the 1920s and 1930s.

Acabashi (talk) 19:14, 26 July 2010 (UTC)

Part reversion[edit]

The term "among others" is vague and uncyclopaedic. Being a substitute for etc., it should always and only be added at the end of a list where what is left is inconsequential, or obviously known to the reader. If the "others" are worth noting - note them.

Direct quotes in body text, such as the one attributed to Alex Seago, need citations for proof. Quotes without citations shouldn't be added.

Acabashi (talk) 21:16, 21 September 2010 (UTC)