Talk:Malvern Water (bottled water)

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Holywell Bottled Water[edit]

Following the closure of the Coca-Cola Colwall bottling plant in 2010 and its subsequent sale to a property developer in October 2011, there remains one commercial bottling plant left: the original site at Holy Well dating back to the 16th century resumed commercial production after restoration, on 20th July 2009, and was expanded in November 2010 with a 330ml bottling line. On July 21st 2011, the Holywell Water Company was awarded Most Promising New Business in Herefordshire & Worcestershire 2011 by the Chamber of Commerce. [1] Elmbeard (talk) 12:49, 2 November 2011 (UTC)Elmbeard

GA Review[edit]

This review is transcluded from Talk:Malvern Water (bottled water)/GA1. The edit link for this section can be used to add comments to the review.

Reviewer: Yellow Dingo (talk · contribs) 09:02, 29 August 2016 (UTC)

I'll take this. - Yellow Dingo (talk) 09:02, 29 August 2016 (UTC)

GA review
(see here for what the criteria are, and here for what they are not)
  1. It is reasonably well written.
    a (prose, spelling, and grammar):
    b (MoS for lead, layout, word choice, fiction, and lists):
  2. It is factually accurate and verifiable.
    a (references):
    b (citations to reliable sources):
    c (OR):
    d (copyvio and plagiarism):
  3. It is broad in its coverage.
    a (major aspects):
    b (focused):
  4. It follows the neutral point of view policy.
    Fair representation without bias:
  5. It is stable.
    No edit wars, etc.:
  6. It is illustrated by images, where possible and appropriate.
    a (images are tagged and non-free images have fair use rationales):
    b (appropriate use with suitable captions):

Overall:
Pass/Fail:

Symbol support vote.svg · Symbol oppose vote.svg · Symbol wait.svg · Symbol neutral vote.svg


Comments[edit]

1a[edit]

Lead and infobox
  • "water is a natural spring water" → "water is natural spring water" Yes check.svg Done
  • Link "Fissures" to Fissure Yes check.svg Done
  • "Fissures in the rock retain rain water, which slowly permeates through, escaping at the springs" → "Fissures in the rock retain rain water which then slowly permeates through before escaping at the springs" Yes check.svg Done
  • "The flow depends" → "The flow rate depends" Yes check.svg Done
  • The second paragraph doesn't really flow well. You go from talking about present day to talking about history. Then more history and then back to present day. Try to make it flow better by keeping it more in chronological order. It is also a bit confusing as you don't say if there is a plant now or, if there isn't, how the water is produced nowadays.Yes check.svg Done
  • In the inbox capitalise "natural" as it is practically the start of a new sentenceYes check.svg Done
History
  • 'grocers have bottled" → grocers bottled" Yes check.svg Done
  • "when with the aid of a Lottery Heritage grant," - missing comma between "when" and "with" Yes check.svg Done
  • "would be ceasing as of 3 November 2010" → "would be ceasing on 3 November 2010" Yes check.svg Done(rephrased)
  • "This is due" → "The decision was due" Yes check.svg Done(rephrased)
  • "is being sold" → "is going to be sold" Yes check.svg Done(rephrased)
Purity
  • "when during 2006 the rock that filters the water dried out" → "when the rock that filters the water dried out during 2006" Yes check.svg Done
  • "Consequently,the" - missing space Yes check.svg Done

2a & 2b[edit]

  • In the royalty section does the cite reference the entire paragraph or does it just reference the first sentence. If the first is true then move the cite to the end of the section. If the latter is true then find a cite for the second sentence Yes check.svg Done - and expanded with additional refs
  • You need a cite for "The springs release an average of about 60 litres a minute." Yes check.svg Done
  • Fix the ref problem in ref #15 Yes check.svg Done now No. 17.link works but is to WayBack machine
  • References 18 Yes check.svg Done (not dead), 9, 5, 14 Yes check.svg Done (MHAONBWaterleafletNorthernHillsrevisedOct10_000.pdf),
8 and 15 are all dead

NOTE: These ref numbers are no longer in sequence, could you please let me know which they are again please. --Kudpung กุดผึ้ง (talk) 11:04, 2 September 2016 (UTC)

Ref numbers[edit]

Ok all ref numbers are as of this revision. I found the dead links using this tool.

  • Fix the red ref error in ref 16 Yes check.svg Done his is now ref 17, or at least until I have added more content on the fly.
  • Link work in ref 13 to Malvern Gazette Yes check.svg Done This is now Ref. 12
  • Refs 10, 19, 9, 6 and 16 are dead Yes check.svg Done redundant refs removed, Dead links replaced with more recent URLs.
  • Bibliography ref 6 is dead Yes check.svg Done online link removed. This is a published book, in print and available.
  • External links 1 and 2 are dead Yes check.svg Done fixed and/or updated

- Yellow Dingo (talk) 01:32, 3 September 2016 (UTC) Forgot to ping you @Kudpung: - Yellow Dingo (talk) 01:45, 3 September 2016 (UTC)

Decision[edit]

Ok a bit of work to do. I'm putting this on hold - Yellow Dingo (talk) 09:38, 29 August 2016 (UTC)

@Kudpung: Just a little reminder about this, I see your almost done. - Yellow Dingo (talk) 08:14, 9 September 2016 (UTC)

Yellow Dingo. I will have it finished today or tomorrow. --Kudpung กุดผึ้ง (talk) 11:17, 10 September 2016 (UTC)
Yellow Dingo I believe this is complete now. Many sources were redundant (2 different sources for the same thing - an old habit of mine). Other dead links replaced with up-to-date sources. --Kudpung กุดผึ้ง (talk) 10:15, 12 September 2016 (UTC)
Looking good Kudpung. I'll take a final look at the article tomorrow and I'l hopefully will be able to promote it. - Yellow Dingo (talk) 11:47, 12 September 2016 (UTC)
Final
  • Ok I'm now satisfied this article meets the criteria. Passing. Well done Kudpung and congrats on a nice article. - Yellow Dingo (talk) 02:31, 13 September 2016 (UTC)

Creator's note[edit]

A native of Malvern but living abroad now for over 45 years, in preparation for this article I was given a personal guided tour of the Colwall plant. Although it was not mentioned to me that the company was to close down a couple of months later, the excellent visitor centre and museum were however already closed but opened for my visit. How fortunate I was to be able to do this at the time! --Kudpung กุดผึ้ง (talk) 03:57, 3 September 2016 (UTC)

  1. ^ http://www.holywellspringwater.co.uk/news.php/