True Love Waits

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This article is about a Christian group. For other uses, see True Love Waits (disambiguation).

True Love Waits (TLW) is an international Christian group that promotes sexual abstinence outside of marriage for teenagers and college students. TLW was created in April, 1993 by the Southern Baptists,[1] and is sponsored by LifeWay Christian Resources. It is based on conservative Christian views of human sexuality that require one to be faithful to one's husband or wife.


The True Love Waits pledge states: "Believing that true love waits, I make a commitment to God, myself, my family, my friends, my future mate and my future children to be sexually abstinent from this day until the day I enter a biblical marriage relationship." In addition, they promote sexual purity, which encompasses not only abstaining from intercourse before marriage, but also abstaining from sexual thoughts, sexual touching, pornography, and actions that are known to lead to sexual arousal.

By the late 1990s, Christian music groups were promoting the program, and events similar to youth rallies were held at Christian music concerts,[2] providing an opportunity for adolescents to sign pledge cards.


In the first year of the campaign, over 102,000 young people signed the pledge, which was also taken up by other church groups including the Roman Catholic Church and Assemblies of God. The campaign has continued to spread across the US, making the use of occasions such as Valentine's Day to gain attention.[3]

As of 2004, groups supporting abstinence numbered in the hundreds. During the previous decade, approximately 2.5 million American youth took the pledge of abstinence.[4]


The efficacy of the program has been questioned not only by studies, but also by contemporary Christian music artists who previously supported the cause.

A a 2003 study showing that 6 out of 10 college students who had taken the pledge had broken it, and of the 40% who identified themselves as abstaining from intercourse, 55% acknowledged having participated in oral sex.[5] In the 2011 book Making Chastity Sexy: The Rhetoric of Evangelical Abstinence Campaigns, Christine Gardner criticizes True Love Waits[6] for "using sex to sell abstinence" by promising more satisfying sexual activity within marriage for those who abstain from premarital sex; she argues that this rhetoric reinforces selfish desires for gratification, sets people up for divorce and dissatisfaction with marriage, and simply adapts "secular forms for religious ends".[7]

Nikki Leonti was involved in True Love Waits prior to making headlines in the contemporary Christian music world. At 18, however, she was pregnant after having sex with Ryan Gingerich out of wedlock. This led the couple to immediately marry in the fall of 1999 upon learning about the pregnancy. The newlyweds, however, divorced by the time Nikki reached her second birthday in 2003.[8]

BarlowGirl was famous and for and very vocal about its purity stances, which led to the sister trio supporting True Love Waits and other similar initiatives. Recently, however, fans have criticized band members for endorsing artists that sing sexually suggestive[9] and sacrilegious[10] lyrics. Alyssa and Lauren Barlow endorsed Beyoncé in 2013[11] and Bruno Mars in 2014. Lauren later endorsed Lady Gaga in 2016.[12]

The Jonas Brothers wore purity rings, but band member Joe Jonas later stated that he regretted the decision: "People were [chaste because of] us […] And we just thought, No! That's not what we're about". Jonas lost his virginity at age 20, despite being unmarried.[13] Later, he co-founded DNCE in 2015, known for racy songs like "Cake by the Ocean". The following year, the band released a music video for "Body Moves", where the members danced with Victoria's Secret Angels. Meanwhile, Nick Jonas performed at the Victoria's Secret Swim Special 2016.[14]

See also[edit]


  1. ^ Guilty Pleasures: Religion and Sex Among American University Students, Huffington Post, July 20, 2010
  2. ^ Price, Deborah Evans (5 July 1997). "Crosse walks many miles to support new reunion set". Billboard. 109 (27): 9–12. ISSN 0006-2510. 
  3. ^ True Love Waits achieves Valentine's Day presence, The Washington Times, February 15, 1997
  4. ^ "How effective are abstinence pledges?". BBC News. 29 June 2004. Retrieved 10 May 2012. 
  5. ^ Boles, Janet K. and Diane Long Hoeveler (2004). Historical Dictionary of Feminism. Scarecrow Press. p. 362. ISBN 9780810849464. 
  6. ^ Hennie Weiss (March 27, 2012). "Review - Making Chastity Sexy". Metapsychology Online Reviews. 16 (13). Retrieved March 21, 2013. 
  7. ^ Sarah Pulliam Bailey (November 18, 2011). "The Rhetoric of Chastity: Making Abstinence Sexy". Christianity Today. Retrieved March 21, 2013. 
  8. ^ "Nikki Leonti Biography". Retrieved 2011-12-15. 
  9. ^ Scaggs, Austin (February 19, 2009). "The 'Just Dance' singer on leotards, the first lady and raunchy lyrics". Rolling Stone. ISSN 0035-791X. 
  10. ^ Perpetua, Matthew (May 5, 2011). "Lady Gaga: Her sexy, sacrilegious 'Judas' video". Rolling Stone. Retrieved May 6, 2011. 
  11. ^ Barlow, Lauren (21 January 2013). ""If Beyonce runs for president in 4 years, I'm totally voting for her...."". Twitter. Retrieved 7 August 2016. 
  12. ^ Barlow, Lauren (7 February 2016). ""Man, Lady Gaga can SING!!!"". Twitter. Retrieved 7 August 2016. 
  13. ^ Lee, Morgan (December 2, 2013). "Joe Jonas Talks About Relationship With God, Frustration With Purity Rings in Raw, Revealing Interview". Retrieved January 16, 2015. 
  14. ^ "'Victoria's Secret Swim Special' will return to CBS in March". Entertainment Weekly's Retrieved 17 October 2016. 

Further reading[edit]

  • Virgin Nation: Sexual Purity and American Adolescence by Sara Moslener, Oxford University Press, 2015.

External links[edit]