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User Profile
No picture. Ha HA!
General info
User name Cernen
Real name Matthew Austin
Gender Male, but if you were paying attention, you'dve figured that out.
Date of birth August 29, 1986.
Age Too young to die, too old to care.
Hometown Puyallup, WA, though Vancouver, WA feels much more like home.
Height 5'8"
Weight Will not disclose
Hair color Brownish Black
Eye color Brown
Ethnicity Irish-German-French-Canadian
Body type Potato-Shaped
Exercise I get enough pushing my luck, tyvm.
Work I make plastic things for men. I used to make plastic things for women a long time ago. Go figure.
Education HSD, MOS-E.
Politics Liberal Independent
Religion I once was lost but now am found, was blind but now I see.
Relationship Currently available for public consumption
Children None, thank God.
Sexuality Undetermined
Drinking No, I use Ambien to screw myself up.
Smoking Not anymore.
Sign Virgo
Personality According to my coworker Moe, I am an asshole. He seems to be the only one that thinks so.
Influences ...
Peeves Being the third wheel.
Frustrations Current world progress.

Who I am[edit]

I'm Matt. I go by a few other names: Mike, Mark, Aaron, Scott, William, Lateral Snowflake, Old Man, The Fat Kid, etc. etc. But mostly, I prefer Matt. I'm also Wikipedia's official 4chan spy. >_> But don't tell the /b/tards.

Why Cernen?[edit]

Because Cernen Xanthine Katrena is my only roleplaying character that I've ever cried for when they died. While I don't plan to do Userpage space articles for all of my characters, Cernen's the only one I feel is worth writing about. (Named my username after him, didn't I?)

Cernen is spelled with a C and two e's. Not "Cernan," "Kernen," or god forbid, "Kernan."

What's a day in the life like?[edit]

Uninteresting. 'Nuff said.

Cernen x Wikipedia Slash[edit]

Generally, whilst on Wikipedia, I have two applications open at -all- times. Text Edit (for copying and pasting wikicode and wikitext and wikithis and wikithat), and Safari (because you can't look at Wikipedia without Safari, or Firefox, or Lynx, or NCSA Mosaic, or godforbid IE).

My wikipediholic test score is 312, which is supposedly fatal, but I'm still alive, so hey...guess it's not that deadly now is it? Mwahaha.

I contribute semi-regularly to the reference desk. As a user, I pretty much read the wiki, and then edit stuff I feel doesn't work out or doesn't make sense.

I belong to a couple of Wikipedian Associations:

  • The Association of Wikipedians Who Dislike Making Broad Judgements About the Worthiness of a General Category of Article, and Who Are In Favor of the Deletion of Some Particularly Bad Articles, but That Doesn't Mean They are Deletionist
  • The Association of Deletionist Wikipedians
  • The Association of Amoral Wikipedians
    • which, I might add, successfully allows me to be a member of the above two associations without conflict (ha ha)
  • The Association of Apathetic Wikipedians
  • The Association of Redirectionist Wikipedians
  • The Association of Reference Desk Volunteers (founder)

And to a couple of Wikiprojects:

  • Wikiproject Computer and Video Games
  • Wikiproject Red Link Recovery
  • Wikiproject Missing Articles (sympathetic)
  • Wikiproject Spoken Articles

Besides being a member of the Gamer Advisory Panel (an SCEA marketing group; I also happen to have a certificate that says so, as well), I'm also a certified Microsoft Office Specialist at the Master level for Office XP (which is now old hat).

Honors and notability here on the Wik[edit]

A question I asked in all seriousness made it to BJAODN page #39, Entry #72 (Cocks). I tend to use humor at the Ref Desk frequently, and honestly had no idea I was that funny.

Undoubtedly, while I am not the first, I was banned from the #wikipedia channel on IRC.

What to do if...[edit]

You don't like me[edit]

There are some users that don't like me very much. I don't mind it; any publicity is good publicity. But I'd like to remind them that, if they'd like, they can ask me to have a nice cup of tea and a sit down. I really would rather not be hated. Of course, if you feel that I need a swift kick in the ass, you may post whatever hateful, snarly, cruel and unusually inappopriate remarks you think I deserve in my testing sandbox, or in my hate mail file. If you choose to remain anonymous, that is of course your business and "we do not be helds responsible if the white folks on the ground finds out about it." (Shirley Q. Liquor) (Please be aware that as far as I am concerned, if you wish to personally attack me, I won't get mad, so long as you do it in one of the above places and nowhere else.)

You do like me[edit]

Buy me dinner. (Just kidding.) Leave me a message on my talk page, or in my not hate mail file. Barnstars, Plusboxes, Wiki thank you note flower things, etc. can go there too.

You think I left Wikiproject Userboxes because I'm a pussy[edit]

You're probably right about that one. I've the backbone of a chocolate eclair.

Something I said offended you[edit]

Let me know how, precisely, and I'll try to explain what I meant. 99.9% of the time, when I offend someone, I misstated myself. There is that occasional .1% where I hate you and meant what I said, but that's rare. I'm generally a nice guy. Heh. (Note that you may also slander me by placing a notation in the hate mail file.)

You want to edit my user page[edit]

Why the hell would you want to do that? I mean, good lord. There's nothing interesting here. It's a veritable wasteland of idiocy.

Something is glaringly wrong here[edit]

You could fix it and be bold, but I'd prefer you leave the fixing part to me. Instead, e-mail me or leave a message on my talk page and tell me what is wrong and what you did to fix it, if anything. Of course, please e-mail me if something goes terribly wrong (like, the Wiki dies a horrible and painful death), or if I'm on a Wikibreak.

Nuvola apps kdmconfig.png This user suspects that George W. Bush may be a sock puppet.
Please refer to his entire presidency for evidence.
This user is a member of the Association of Wikipedians Who Dislike Making Broad Judgements About the Worthiness of a General Category of Article, and Who Are In Favor of the Deletion of Some Particularly Bad Articles, but That Doesn't Mean They are Deletionist

The motto of the AWWDMBJAWGCAWAIFDSPBATDMTD is Est omnino difficile iudicare inclusionis meritum cuiusdam rei in encyclopædia cum ratio sciendi quid populi referat incerta sit, sed nihilominus aliquid encyclopædiam dedecet, which translates to, "it is generally difficult to judge the worthiness of a particular topic for inclusion in an encyclopedia considering that there is no certain way to know what interests people, but some topics nevertheless are not fit for an encyclopedia." This motto reflects the desire of these Wikipedians to be reluctant, but not entirely unwilling, to remove articles from Wikipedia.