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The Way is to react or not-react ala video et taceo ( / ) to any person in complement to the situation and his intelligence, cultural background, social status, education, maturity, and mood. The good life is one inspired by love and guided by knowledge

People don't buy what you do; they buy why you do it. Talk about what you believe.

where to be[edit]

  • Düsseldorf: mild weather and stricter smoking ban, large Japanese population
  • warm-summer Mediterranean climate are found in northwestern Iberia, coastal California and parts of the Pacific Northwest, central Chile, parts of southern Australia, sections of southwestern South Africa and sections of the Atlantic coast of Morocco.
  • tourism: Prague (cold winters)
  • Mexico City's artsy Coyoacán neighbourhood. “You can be in Polanco living with all the amenities and dining and shopping of any luxury city,” Ermini said. “Coyoacán offers an artsy, hippy-like community feel and Roma, Mexico City is like the new Brooklyn


Drift coffee mag VOLUME 3: HAVANA

Radial styloid process/Ulnar styloid process

Giacca Napoletana - Italian Tailoring Doug Bihlmaier Creative director, RRL

The chemicals used in the dye stage have been linked to cancer, asthma and neurological problems Savile Row Member houses make a house that looks like Dr. Seuss Library made in Indonesia: Padang, Padang cuisine Trento Bolzano Bologna Belluno Siena Ravenna Firenze Macerata Aosta Milan Sondrio Trieste Modena Manno training same


Silat SAMI

Lapham's Quarterly is a literary magazine established in 2007 by former Harper's Magazine editor Lewis H. Lapham.

you may be an INTP, also known as Architect (role variant) like Darwin, Einstein, Jefferson and Gregory Peck. INTPs are marked by a quiet, stoic, modest, and aloof exterior that masks strong creativity and enthusiasm for novel possibilities. Their weaknesses include poor organization, insensitivity to social niceties, and a tendency to get lost in abstractions. INTPs are relatively rare, accounting for 1–5% of the U.S. population.

take Narcissistic Personality Inventory

have the courage to start with the customer. My biggest regrets are the moments that I let a lack of data override my intuition on what's best for our customers. --Andrew Mason

松鶴道 Don Draper: tall, dark and handsome. Height. Handsomeness. A full head of hair. Talent. Brains. A piledriver work ethic. A subdued sense of excitability that prevents him from giving off the skittish vibe. cheap classic watch

Wears his clothes very well. Always impeccably groomed. Physically fit.

He’s a private, brooding, unknowable creative force. Can mix all the IBA cocktails.

Don Draper formal style nick wooster +  Milan Vukmirovic casual style = brand Riccardo Fortelli

Ad Men[edit]

global account liaison: play up language skills IDEO (“eye-dee-oh”), Strawberry Frog, Second Story Mullen


diversity: Albany Park, Chicago ° Jamaica, Queens ° Elmhurst, Queens ° Chinatown, Flushing


Bruce Feiler / Robert Twigger / Michael Ruhlman-style participatory observation nonfiction writer

Eat and Drink[edit]

Slow-Carb Diet. Ketogenic diet might affect a number of adult neurodegenerative disorders. Blood, Bones & Butter


Hug Your Customers ESSEC London Business School Copenhagen Business School

meditationHypercube United States Marine Corps Physical Fitness Test: no weights exercise WWOOF > Landscape architecture urban gardens

charge based on value to client

Seven Point Creed[edit]

John Wooden's Seven Point Creed, given to him by his father Joshua upon his graduation from grammar school:

  • Be true to yourself.
  • Make each day your masterpiece.
  • Help others.
  • Drink deeply from good books, especially the Bible.
  • Make friendship a fine art.
  • Build a shelter against a rainy day.
  • Pray for guidance and give thanks for your blessings every day.

At the top of the Pyramid of Success was "Competitive Greatness" which Wooden defined as "Perform at your best when your best is required. Your best is required each day."

Among Wooden's maxims:

  • Failing to prepare is preparing to fail.
  • Flexibility is the key to stability.
  • Be quick, but don't hurry.
Green means go
Here be dragons


New Republic National Review politico tumblr washingtonpost nytimes latimes businessweek TIME usatoday Foreign Policy Passport 秀逸な記事 bloomberg CNBC BBC guardian weeklystandard slate drudge dailyfx Belgravia Dispatch El País 朝日新聞国際ニュース 环境保护部政府网站数据中心 Eldon Men's Health Esquire

Martial arts[edit]

Jocko Willink says: BJJ, boxing, muay thai, wrestling

seagal randori build a 養神館 合気道龍 藏龍館 道場 with JICA funding

  • Sink with every movement: Martial arts proficiency depends on a solid base from which to direct energy. Postures should have a continuous structural connection between the base, the waist, and the extension of the arms/hands.
  • Maintain good posture: This connection depends on the back being straight and the elbows and shoulders being sunk.
  • Maintain center alignment: Keep the hands and arms in front of the body and direct the movement from the waist. When turning, also turn the hands in toward the center of the body to maintain the alignment. Head and eyes should be facing in the same direction as the hands.
  • Move from your center: Do not try to execute techniques solely with the hands and arms. They are only energetic extensions of your hara, or physical center of gravity. If your posture is good, your hands and arms are in correct alignment, and you move from your center, then the technique will unfold.
  • Breathe: Kokyu, or breath, is one of the fundamental tools of the Aikidoka. Ki is also sometimes translated as breath. Breathe energy into your hands as you execute techniques and take ukemi, and your arms and body will be filled with that energy. Extend your idea beyond the target: Visualize your movement extending beyond your opponent’s body. Extend out and gather in as if your partner is not there.
  • Maintain your balance, take your opponent’s: Aikido works because we sequentially and progressively take our opponent’s balance without compromising our own. The best uke is one who attempts to maintain his/her own balance as long as possible.
  • Do not rely on strength or speed: Internal martial arts such as Aikido develop the ability to direct energy with the mind in order to take an opponent’s balance without the use of strength or speed. If a technique is not working, examine your movement with respect to the principles; do not use more strength or speed. Aikido techniques are very effective and safe for your partner when done correctly, but can be injurious when done incorrectly, too strong, or too fast.
  • Face your opponent: Move in such a way that you do not turn your back on your opponent when he/she has his/her balance, as nage or as uke. Relax and enjoy – Aikido is a path, a journey. Don’t be hard on yourself.
  • Take your time: Continuity of training with good intentions is more important than exertion. Focus first on the principles, then on technique, and last of all on throwing or being thrown. In this way your practice will be more meaningful, more rewarding, and safer.


Mind the GapThe Cathedral and the BazaarIrritable male syndrome  • Tinea versicolor  • The 48 Laws of Power • Thirty-Six Strategies  • 百家姓  • 성명  • Blank maps • Coffee and health  • Tea and health  • Geospy  • calculate-distance

"callipygian" schott lifeshifting The Descent of Power Robert Greene

the image of my personal character (ethos), the logical proofs (logos), and the use of emotion (pathos).

The Mask of Sanity[edit]

empathy > our ability to identify what someone else is thinking or feeling and to respond to their thoughts and feelings with an appropriate emotion. --Simon Baron-Cohen

Hare Psychopathy Checklist  • Psychopathy  • The Mask of Sanity  • Is Your Boss a Psychopath?  • Diagnosis of Asperger syndrome What is Asperger Syndrome?  • Schizoid personality disorder  • dissocial personality disorder‎  • Mixed state (psychiatry)  • Bipolar disorder  • Smilie - a portmanteau of smile and lie


exilelifestyle Lovemarks is a marketing technique that is intended to replace the idea of brands. Saatchi & Saatchi CEO Kevin Roberts claims, "Brands are running out of juice". He considers that love is what is needed to rescue brands. Roberts asks, "What builds Loyalty that goes Beyond Reason? What makes a truly great love stand out?" Roberts suggests the following are the key ingredients to create lovemarks:

Great stories: past, present and future; taps into dreams, myths and icons; and inspiration
Sound, sight, smell, touch, and taste
Commitment, empathy, and passion

Roberts explains the relationship between lovemarks and other selling concepts through a simple schema based on respect and love. The full schema is as follows: mere products (commodities) command neither love nor respect. Fads attract love, but without respect this love is just a passing infatuation. Brands attract respect, even lasting respect, but without love. Lovemarks, explains Roberts, command both respect and love. This is achieved through the trinity of mystery, sensuality, and intimacy.



Vanishing Point (1971 film), John Prine

Self-actualization and Maslow's Hierarchy[edit]

The term was later used by Abraham Maslow in his article, A Theory of Human Motivation. Maslow explicitly defines self-actualization to be "the desire for self-fulfillment, namely the tendency for him [the individual] to become actualized in what he is potentially. This tendency might be phrased as the desire to become more and more what one is, to become everything that one is capable of becoming." Maslow used the term self-actualization to describe a desire, not a driving force, that could lead to realizing one's capabilities. Maslow did not feel that self-actualization determined one's life; rather, he felt that it gave the individual a desire, or motivation to achieve budding ambitions.

Self-Actualised person according to Maslow "He possesses an unusual ability to detect the spurious, the fake, the dishonest in personality, and in general to judge the people correctly and efficiently"

Common traits amongst people who have reached self-actualization are:

  • They embrace reality and facts rather than denying truth.
  • They are spontaneous.
  • They are interested in solving problems.
  • They are accepting of themselves and others and lack prejudice.

JK said:

  1. Scribbled secret notebooks, and wild typewritten pages, for your own joy
  2. Submissive to everything, open, listening
  3. Try never get drunk outside your own house
  4. Be in love with your life
  5. Something that you feel will find its own form
  6. Be crazy dumbsaint of the mind
  7. Blow as deep as you want to blow
  8. Write what you want bottomless from bottom of the mind
  9. The unspeakable visions of the individual
  10. No time for poetry but exactly what is
  11. Visionary tics shivering in the chest
  12. In tranced fixation dreaming upon object before you
  13. Remove literary, grammatical and syntactical inhibition
  14. Like Proust be an old teahead of time
  15. Telling the true story of the world in interior monolog
  16. The jewel center of interest is the eye within the eye
  17. Write in recollection and amazement for yourself
  18. Work from pithy middle eye out, swimming in language sea
  19. Accept loss forever
  20. Believe in the holy contour of life
  21. Struggle to sketch the flow that already exists intact in mind
  22. Don't think of words when you stop but to see picture better
  23. Keep track of every day the date emblazoned in your morning
  24. No fear or shame in the dignity of your experience, language & knowledge
  25. Write for the world to read and see your exact pictures of it
  26. Bookmovie is the movie in words, the visual American form
  27. In praise of Character in the Bleak inhuman Loneliness
  28. Composing wild, undisciplined, pure, coming in from under, crazier the better
  29. You're a Genius all the time
  30. Writer-Director of Earthly movies Sponsored & Angeled in Heaven


Excess post-exercise oxygen consumption Seal team Armed combat course wih Frank CucciKALI EMPTY HANDS ReloadedClaudio Christian Tissier: pivoting 合気道 - Katate Dori - Irimi Nage Pascal Guillemin = tall Frenchman. Bruno Gonzalez = grayhair
Tamura ikkyoIkyyo 8min • nishiodoshuYoshi IchidaKokyu ho variationsDoshu Moriteru Ueshiba Ikkyo Ura NIKETRAINING.COM.HK 養神館合気道 Terry Dobson Dojocho


彼は出会うどの美人ともいちゃつく ° Cordoba, Argentina °

WISP: work intellectual social physical

  • work
  • intellectual/contemplative - books, newspapers
  • social - bars, yoga, makeup counter
  • physical

preselected by other femmes. leader of men. protector of loved ones. willing to emote. Display Higher Value
Be confident. Include self-deprecation of past experiences. Don't hold onto your beer like a life preserver. Tease without actually insulting. Never whine or complain. Use specific compliments. Touch. Use Wingwomen a lot. Make her laugh. Buy her one drink. DHV
he stays playful. a little bit pushy. not rude, a gentleman. cocky. vague. he pulls rather than pushing. looks. belong to a tribe she wants to visit. adaptability/not uptight. humor. intelligence. spontaneous. strength. ability to take care of her. decisiveness. useful practical knowledge. assertive. live in your reality. value. emotional connection. sensitivity. goals. ambition. identity. self-worth. confidence. high status behavior. feel worthy. this world is mine.

Hypnotica Describes What It Means To Be A Man Mickey Rourke in 9½ Weeks; Tom Cruise in Risky Business Californication - Hank Moody add value M Mehow debrief 2 on TVSF knee levels compliance test body language visual anchor Ross Jeffries Zan on WWW Zan on LTR Zan at DDeA leiceister jugglerWISP hollywood (in Swedish) w x y z londoners 2 2


 Indonesia Bandung

 Brazil: Vila Madalena in São Paulo; Natal, Rio Grande do Norte is safest capital. Curitiba is good. Salvador is bad. Northeast is more "Brasilian" but more poor. Assaí and Uraí in Paraná may have more Japanese Brazilians

우물 안 개구리는 바다를 모른다 concierge GaWC World Cities 2008

 Georgia Tbilisi 1 year visa on arrival!

 Mexico: Guadalajara, Jalisco

 Puerto Rico Tourism in Puerto Rico •

 Taiwan: Taipei: 合氣道推廣訓練協進會 師大 Mandarin Training Center or 台大 International Chinese Language Program

 South Korea: korea wwoof sanmaeul

 Croatia: Split (city): University of Split  •

 Colombia: Medellin

 Tunisia: they are acutely aware that the international spotlight is on them

San Pedro Garza García | Leuven | Dongtan | Huangbaiyu | richest_cities | Tokyo #1 still in 2020

List of cities by GDP | 新宿区二丁目 is gay Recife for Brazilian Carnival | City of Light Development | San Miguel District, Lima | List of urban areas by population | DTRW | Peace Boat | world cities | List of smoking bans | Metrorail (Washington, D.C.): Howard University | 2014 FIFA World Cup: Brazil | | List of countries by GNI per capita | Sg | List of Latin American countries by GDP (nominal) | Suzlon Energy | Vestas

Putonghua and Nippongo[edit]


Newsweek in Japanese JLPT-2 vocab JLPT-2 kanji MIT OpenCourseWare

敬天愛人「道は天地自然の物にして、人は之を行ふものなれば、天を敬するを目的とす。天は人も我も同一に愛し給ふ故、我を愛する心を以て人を愛するなり」(『南洲翁遺訓』) 西郷隆盛の思想

Spoken Chinese


Starbucks means capitalism

You have Alexithymia and mind-blindness.

Type Five, The Investigator The Functions of Mental Focus and Expert Knowledge. The potential for curiosity, perceptiveness, the acquisition of knowledge, inventive originality, and technical expertise. Negatively, the potential for speculative theorizing, emotional detachment, eccentricity, social isolation, and mental projections.

Type Seven, The Enthusiast The Functions of Spontaneity and Diverse Activity. The potential for enthusiasm, productivity, achievement, skill acquisition, and the desire for change and variety. Negatively, the potential for hyperactivity, superficiality, impulsiveness, excessiveness, and escapism.

Type One, The Reformer The Functions of Ethical Standards and Responsibility. The potential for moderation, conscience, maturity, self-discipline, and delayed gratification. Negatively, the potential for rigid self-control, impersonal perfectionism, judgmentalism, and self-righteousness.

Advertising· Consultant· Technical Writer . Photojournalist Anthropologist

200 saatchi employment You would most enjoy a career that allows you to meet new people. You would also be happiest in a career that allows you to be free and flexible, and allows you to be extremely creative. Some careers that would be perfect for you are: Dental hygienist . Dietitian . Web Developer . . Farmer . Dental hygienist· Photojournalism · Marketing· Teacher· Financial Adviser· Financial Planner· Stockbroker· Secretary· Receptionist· Director· Recruitment Consultant· Politician· Human Resources Manager· Religious Minister· Lawyer· GP· Physical Therapy· Occupational Therapy· Public Relations· Estate Agent· Travel Agent· Restauranteur· Hotel Manager· Events Organiser

The art of seduction[edit]

The trick to surviving the chase is not to take yourself, or the interaction, too seriously. I always choose an opening line that borders on the absurd. "I like the way you make that pink push-up bra look intellectual" – and if she is the kind of woman that likes this kind of attention, she will laugh. And if you listen well, you can tell if she is likely to play or nay. It is not because she laughs that indicates her willingness, but how she laughs. It has to be a sort of curious amusement that comes from her eyes and travels to her mouth. Never mention that her skin is beautiful or that her legs go on for ever. Remember, she navigates that sort of cheese from men all day long. Never, ever overtly refer to the electricity crackling between the two of you. Courting requires the skill of restraint.

  • Phase One: Separation

Stirring Interest and Desire

1. CHOOSE THE RIGHT VICTIM Everything depends on the target of your seduction. Study your prey thoroughly, and choose only those who will prove susceptible to your charms. The right victims are those for whom you can fill a void, who see in you something exotic. They are often isolated or unhappy, or can easily be made so- for the completely contented person is almost impossible to seduce. The perfect victim has some quality that inspires strong emotions in you, making your seductive maneuvers seem more natural and dynamic. The perfect victim allows for the perfect chase.

2. CREATE A FALSE SENSE OF SECURITY- APPROACH INDIRECTLY If you are too direct early on, you risk stirring up a resistance that will never be lowered. At first there must be nothing of the seducer in your manner. The seduction should begin at an angle, indirectly, so that the target only gradually becomes aware of you. Haunt the periphery of your target�s life- approach through a third party, of seem to cultivate a relatively neutral relationship, moving gradually from friend to lover. Lull the target into feeling secure, then strike.

3. SEND MIXED SIGNALS Once people are aware of your presence, and perhaps vaguely intrigued, you need to stir their interest before it settles on someone else. Most of us are much too obvious- instead, be hard to figure out. Send mixed signals: both tough and tender, both spiritual and earthly, both innocent and cunning. A mix of qualities suggests depth, which fascinates even as it confuses. An elusive, enigmatic aura will make people want to know more, drawing them into your circle. Create such a power by hinting at something contradictory within you.

4. APPEAR TO BE AN OBJECT OF DESIRE- CREATE TRIANGLES Few are drawn to the person whom others avoid and neglect; people gather around those who have already attracted interest. To draw your victims closer and make them hungry to possess you, you must create an aura of desirability- of being wanted and courted by many. It will become a point of vanity for them to be the preferred object of your attention, to win you away from a crowd of admirers. Build a reputation that precedes you: If many have succumbed to your charms there must be a reason.

5. CREATE A NEED- STIR ANXIETY AND DISCONTENT A perfectly satisfied person cannot be seduced. Tension and disharmony must be instilled in your targets' minds. Stir within them feelings of discontent, an unhappiness with their circumstances and themselves. The feeling of inadequacy that you create will give you space to insinuate yourself, to make them see you as the answer to their problems. Pain and anxiety are the proper precursors to pleasure. Learn to manufacture the need that you can fill.

6. MASTER THE ART OF INSINUATION Making your targets feel dissatisfied and in need of your attention is essential, but if you are too obvious, they will see through you and grow defensive. There is no known defense, however, against insinuation- the art of planting ideas in people's minds by dropping hints that take root days later, even appearing to them as their own idea. Create a sublanguage - bold statement followed by retraction and apology, ambiguous comments, banal talk combined with alluring glances- that enters the target's unconscious to convey your real meaning. Make everything suggestive.

7. ENTER THEIR SPIRIT Most people are locked in their own worlds, making them stubborn and hard to persuade. The way to lure them out of their shell and set up your seduction is to enter their spirit. Play by their rules, enjoy what they enjoy, adapt yourself to their moods. In doing so you will stroke their deep-rooted narcissism and lower their defenses. Indulge your targets' every move and whim, giving them nothing to react against or resist.

8. CREATE TEMPTATION Lure the target deep into your seduction by creating the proper temptation: a glimpse of the pleasures to come. As the serpent tempted Eve with the promise of forbidden knowledge, you must awaken a desire in your targets that they cannot control. Find that weakness of theirs, that fantasy that has yet to be realized, and hint that you can lead them toward it. The key is to keep it vague. Stimulate a curiosity stronger than the doubts and anxieties that go with it, and they will follow you. Phase Two: Lead Astray Creating Pleasure and Confusion

9. KEEP THEM IN SUSPENSE- WHAT COMES NEXT The moment people feel they know what to expect from you, your spell on them is broken. More: You have ceded them power. The only way to lead the seduced along and keep the upper hand is to create suspense, a calculated surprise. Doing something they do not expect from you will give them a delightful sense of spontaneity- they will not be able to foresee what comes next. You are always one step ahead and in control. Give the victim a thrill with a sudden change of direction.

10. USE THE DEMONIC POWER OF WORDS TO SOW CONFUSION It is hard to make people listen; they are consumed with their own thoughts and desires, and have little time for yours. The trick to making them listen is to say what they want to hear, to fill their ears with whatever is pleasant to them. This is the essence of seductive language. Inflame people's emotions with loaded phrases, flatter them, comfort their insecurities, envelop them is sweet words and promises, and not only will they listen to you, they will lose their will to resist you.

11. PAY ATTENTION TO DETAIL Lofty words of love and grand gestures can be suspicious: Why are you trying so hard to please? The details of a seduction- the subtle gestures, the offhand things you do- are often more charming and revealing. You must learn to distract your victims with a myriad of pleasant little rituals- thoughtful gifts tailored just for them, clothes and adornments designed to please them, gestures that show the time and attention you are paying them. Mesmerized by what they see, they will not notice what you are really up to.

12. POETICIZE YOUR PRESENCE Important things happen when your targets are alone: The slightest feeling of relief that you are not there, and it is all over. Familiarity and overexposure will cause this reaction. Remain elusive, then. Intrigue your targets by alternating an exciting presence with a cool distance, exuberant moments followed by calculated absences. Associate yourself with poetic images and objects, so that when they think of you, they begin to see you through and idealized halo. The more you figure in their minds, the more they will envelop you in seductive fantasies.

13. DISARM THROUGH STRATEGIC WEAKNESS AND VULNERABILITY Too much maneuvering on your part may raise suspicion. The best way to cover your tracks is to make the other person feel superior and stronger. If you seem to be weak, vulnerable, enthralled by the other person, and unable to control yourself, you will make your actions look more natural, less calculated. Physical weakness- tears, bashfulness, paleness- will help create the effect. Play the victim, and then transform your target's sympathy into love.

14. CONFUSE DESIRE AND REALITY- THE PERFECT ILLUSION To compensate for the difficulties in their lives, people spend a lot of their time daydreaming, imagining a future full of adventure, success, and romance. If you can create the illusion that through you they can live out their dreams, you will have them at your mercy. Aim at secret wishes that have been thwarted or repressed, stirring up uncontrollable emotions, clouding their powers of reason. Lead the seduced to a point of confusion in which they can no longer tell the difference between illusion and reality.

15. ISOLATE THE VICTIM An isolated person is weak. By slowly isolating your victims, you make them more vulnerable to your influence. Take them away from their normal milieu, friends, family, and home. Give them the sense of being marginalized, in limbo- they are leaving one world behind and entering another. Once isolated like this, they have no outside support, and in their confusion they are easily led astray. Lure the seduced into your lair, where nothing is familiar. Phase Three: The Precipice Deepening the Effect Through Extreme Measures

16. PROVE YOURSELF Most people want to be seduced. If they resist your efforts, it is probably because you have not gone far enough to allay their doubts- about your motives, the depth of your feelings, and so on. One well-timed action that shows how far you are willing to go to win them over will dispel their doubts. Do not worry about looking foolish or making a mistake-any kind of deed that is self-sacrificing and for your targets' sake will overwhelm their emotions, they won't notice anything else.

17. EFFECT A REGRESSION People who have experienced certain kind of pleasure in the past will try to repeat or relive it. The deepest-rooted and most pleasurable memories are usually those of early childhood, and are often unconsciously associated with parental figures. Bring your target back to that point by placing yourself in the oedipal triangle and positioning them as the needy child. Unaware of the cause of their emotional response, they will fall in love with you.

18. STIR UP THE TRANSGRESSIVE AND TABOO There are always social limits on what one can do. Some of these, the most elemental taboos, go back centuries; others are more superficial, simply defining polite acceptable behavior. Making your targets feel that you are leading them past either kind of limit is immensely seductive. People yearn to explore their dark side. Once the desire to transgress draws your target to you, it will be hard for them to stop. Take them farther than they imagined-the shared feeling of guilt and complicity will create a powerful bond.

19. USE SPIRITUAL LURES Everyone has doubts and insecurities-about their body, their self worth, their sexuality. If your seduction appeals exclusively to the physical, you will stir up these doubts and make your targets self conscious. Instead, lure them out of their insecurities by making them focus on something sublime and spiritual: a religious experience, a lofty work of art, the occult. Lost in a spiritual mist, the target will feel light and uninhibited. Deepen the effect of your seduction by making its sexual culmination seem like the spiritual union of two souls.

20. MIX PLEASURE WITH PAIN The greatest mistake in seduction is being too nice. At first, perhaps, your kindness is charming, but soon it grows monotonous; you are trying to hard to please, and seem insecure. Instead of overwhelming your targets with niceness, try inflicting some pain. Make them feel guilty and insecure. Instigate a breakup- now a rapprochement, a return to your earlier kindness, will turn them weak at the knees. The lower lows you create, the greater the highs. To heighten the erotic charge, create the excitement of fear. Phase Four: Moving In for the Kill

21. GIVE THEM SPACE TO FALL- THE PURSUER IS PURSUED If your targets become too used to you as the aggressor, they will give less of their own energy, and the tension will slacken. You need to wake them up, turn the tables. Once they are under your spell, take a step back and they will start to come after you. Hint that you are growing bored. Seem interested in someone else. Soon they will want to possess you physically, and restraint will go out the window. Create the illusion that the seducer is being seduced.

22. USE PHYSICAL LURES Targets with active minds are dangerous: If they see through your manipulations, they may suddenly develop doubts. Put their minds gently to rest, and waken their dormant senses, by combining a non defensive attitude with a charged sexual presence. While your cool, nonchalant air is lowering their inhibitions, your glances, voice, and bearing-oozing sex and desire-are getting under their skin and raising their temperature. Never force the physical; instead infect your target with heat, lure them into lust. Morality, judgment, and concern for the future will melt away.

23. MASTER THE ART OF THE BOLD MOVE A moment has arrived: Your victim clearly desires you, but is not ready to admit it openly, let alone act on it. This is time to throw aside chivalry, kindness, and coquetry and to overwhelm them with a bold move. Don't give the victim time to consider the consequences. Showing hesitation or awkwardness means you are thinking of yourself, as opposed to being overwhelmed by the victim's charms. One person must go on the offensive, and it is you.

24. BEWARE THE AFTEREFFECTS Danger follows in the aftermath of a successful seduction. After emotions have reached a pitch, they often swing in the opposite direction-toward lassitude, distrust, disappointment. If you are to part, make the sacrifice swift and sudden. If you are to stay in a relationship, beware a flagging of energy, a creeping familiarity that will spoil the fantasy. A second seduction is required. Never let the other person take you for granted- use absence, create pain and conflict, to keep the seduced on tenterhooks