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Your remarks are unnacceptable and have no place here. Please either retract them or leave Wikipedia for good. -- Loomis 00:25, 2 August 2006 (UTC)
Stop being a penis. -- MoodyGroove 23:52, 25 June 2007 (UTC)
Kainaw, seriously, you have no idea what you are talking about. -- Dragons flight 17:28, 2 August 2007 (UTC)
I would appreciate if you never ever crossed my path. -- TomCat111 18:47, 28 August 2007 (UTC)
You obviously have no idea what you are talking about. -- Navnløs 17:45, 13 December 2007 (UTC)
Your comment at WP:RD/C was uncivil. I have reported you to WP:AIV. -- Interactive Fiction Expert 06:02, 20 June 2008 (UTC)
My statement "I expect an immediate apology" (for your incivility) was not a request. -- Philcha 12:59, 16 September 2008 (UTC)
I'm afraid you do appear to be lacking knowledge. -- Walter pepper 00:30, 7 March 2009 (UTC)
Wow. You're a really big troll. -- IndexOutOfBounds 15:15, 11 August 2009 (UTC)
Your personality is disgusting, Kainaw. Someone should take your kids away from you (if you have any). -- Drknkn 02:00, 24 December 2009 (UTC)
Kainaw you are not illiterate and YOUR pretending to be so just looks mischievous. -- Cuddlyable3 18:16, 18 February 2011 (UTC)
(Asshole)...your rant about this person is totally useless. I do feel sorry for the woman you mentioned for knowing someone like you. -- Joepnl 03:15, 8 December 2011 (UTC)
Struck names have been permanently blocked.
Noia 64 apps karm.svg This user has been on Wikipedia for 11 years and 1 day.

I award this barnstar to Kainaw for his numerous contributions to the Wikipedia Reference Desk--Brian G. Crawford

The Barnstar of Diligence for your work with WP:HELPDESK. It is vital to Wikipedia.--Sharkface217

For your sober handling of a troll at Ref. Desk--Cuddlyable3

For answering part of my question, because I'm one step closer to DYK!--Kayau

For quality contributions, including starting the article about Mary Allen Wilkes, about women in computing and technology. Thank you!--SarahStierch

Thanks for protecting Kryptos.--Drazil91

This editor is a Veteran Editor II and is entitled to display this Bronze Editor Star.
Mouse over awards for descriptions.

I was born. I lived. I died. If you are interested in finding out information about me and not my work here on Wikipedia, go to my homepage.

Frequently Asked Questions[edit]

What does "Kainaw" mean?
See my faq.
What's up with your annoying sig on talk pages and the reference desk?
It is symbolic. The red fading to blue symbolizes work in turning red links into blue ones.
What is your job? (Are you a doctor? Are you a lawyer?)
I am a software engineer, nearing completion of my PhD. Soon, I will be a college professor. I work in a hospital on medical research - providing computer expertise for medical doctors. My evening job is providing computer expertise for lawyers throughout the city. When I answer medical or legal questions, I rarely know what it is I am answering. I am merely repeating an answer given to me from a doctor or lawyer that I work for.
Why hedgehogs?
Why not? Everyone seems to think it is abnormal to like hedgehogs but perfectly normal to like dogs or cats. I think dogs and cats are just fine, but I prefer hedgehogs. You got a problem with that?
Why do you have those nasty messages at the top of your user page?
I assume that most people fill their user page with information about how nice or knowledgeable they are. I want to ensure that anyone who visits my user page realizes that I am not always nice and I am not always knowledgeable. In fact, I am sometimes so mean and stupid that others feel it necessary to write nasty messages to me.
What is Kainaw's criterion?
User:Kainaw/Kainaw's criterion is what I use to decide if a question on the Reference Desk is or is not a request for medical advice. You may use it also, if you like, but it is not an official policy of any kind.

Frequently Given Answers[edit]

This is a cheat-sheet to help me remember frequently given answers:

  • {{subst:creation|user}} (Used for "How do I create an article?")
  • {{subst:sofixit}} (Used for "I found an error on a page.")
  • {{subst:dyoh}} (Used for homework questions.")
  • {{subst:uw-test1}} {{subst:uw-test2}} {{subst:uw-test3}} (Used for edit testers (unintentional vandals).)
  • {{subst:uw-vandalism1}} {{subst:uw-vandalism2}} {{subst:uw-vandalism3}} (Used for vandals.)
  • The plural of [[anecdote]] is not [[data]]. (Used for "I know a guy who..." arguments.)

Comments, Complaints, and Kudos[edit]

I really enjoy Wikipedia. I enjoy it a bit too much. In my standard eight-hour work day, I spend at least two hours on Wikipedia. Then, another two hours or so at home each night. Yes, I am an addict.

As much as I enjoy Wikipedia, there are some things that really annoy me.

  • Fear of Medical Responses on the Reference Desk: Some users fear medical responses on the Reference Desk so much that they will delete anything that remotely resembles a medical response. There are many examples of questions that are not requests for medical advice and responses that are not medical advice - but the entire thread is deleted. I have been trying to make this problem noticeable by harping on each user who deletes these threads in a public arena so others can see how prevalent the problem is.
  • Math-Speak: With a very rare exception, all of the math-related articles that I've found on Wikipedia are written in Math-speak, not English. If you need help with some math topic, you have to go to college and get a math degree just to read the article. The contributors to the articles consider it vandalism to explain the formulas in plain English and quickly revert any changes made. I consider it evil. Knowledge should be free. It should not be hidden behind a cryptic formula.
  • Also...Also...: As articles are appended, one author adds "also...". Then, the next author adds "also...". It doesn't take long for an article to read like "...also...also...also...also..." - which I believe is terrible. So, when I see excessive use of "also", I quickly merge it all into a list or compound sentence.


The primary article that I monitor is Hedgehog. I have spent many years studying hedgehogs and have absorbed information from many veterinarians, breeders, pet owners, and a brain surgeon. I am not a licensed or accredited expert in the area of hedgehogs. I am simply very well read and I've been handling them for many years.

Related to hedgehogs are the two articles Domesticated Hedgehog and Wobbly hedgehog syndrome. I monitor both of these articles and provide new information on WHS as it becomes available.

Why hedgehogs? Many years ago, I wanted a pet that would be happy with my long work-hours and my small apartment. I did a lot of research and found that a hedgehog is happiest to be up all night and doesn't require a lot of space. So, I read every book I could find on the subject of hedgehogs and eventually purchased one as a pet. That led to two more. In the process, I became friends with a brain surgeon who has spent many years studying multiple schlerosis. His hedgehog got Wobbly hedgehog syndrome and he noticed the similarity between MS and WHS. When his hedgehog passed away, he did a necropsy and found that WHS is in fact nearly identical to MS. Because his work was not funded (and probably against hospital regulations), it is not published. But, it has been very helpful for treating hedgehogs with WHS.


I am a fan of the Kansas City Chiefs, which has led me to do a lot of work on the NFL article (as well as the Chiefs article). I admit, I am responsible for the NFL Lore section. It has become a monster all to itself and has created bastard step-children, such as the Famous Nicknames section. That was not my intention. I just wanted to make a resource for very common terms, such as The Catch. Now, I have been arguing for support to completely delete the NFL Lore page.

Reference Desk[edit]

I try to be active on the Wikipedia Reference Desk when I can. I focus on the computing, humanities and science sections. Some think that I am rude when I simply tell a person to read an article, but if the answer is clearly available in the article, why should anyone copy and paste it just because someone else is too lazy to look.

I developed Kainaw's criterion for the identification of requests for medical advice in the hope that it will reduce the wasteful debates that spring up every time a question is removed.

Passing fancies[edit]

Some articles get my attention for a short while. Usually, I just find the article lacking in information and I want to improve it. All in all, I come in, do my best to improve things a bit, and then forget about the article.

Nude Bowl[edit]

I skated the Nude Bowl in 1990 and 1991. I went back in 1993, but a bunch of skinhead punks were camping out there. I created an article about it here to see if anyone else can fill in the history.

Suicidal Tendencies[edit]

I listened to Suicidal Tendencies a great deal as a teenager (before I mellowed out and got into Led Zeppelin). When I first read the article here, I was disappointed. It wasn't well written and it contained some factual errors. I saw a comment that the article was actually copied from another website. So, I rewrote the entire article and I have continued to try and add pertinent information to it, such as the ever-changing band lineup. I would like to continue to write about Mike Muir, but I know very little about him.

Committed identity: cb4a2f69f1ad96ee61f8669da5447cbc is a Md5 commitment to this user's real-life identity.