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Scientific classification
Kingdom: Animalia
Phylum: Chordata
Class: Alienamammalia
Subclass: Siriustheria
Order: Cetacea
Suborder: Odontoceti
Family: Stelleridae
Genus: Nommonomus
Species: chronicus
Binomial name
Nommonomus chronicus

Introduction by the author[edit]

I am sitting in a room different to the one you are in now, unless you are in the room that I am in now, which is very unlikely unless you are me. Even if it is the same room, it will be different, as the objects within it will have moved. At the very least the air will be different. Unless you are in this room at the same moment as I am, right now, as I write this. Which you aren't.

The room is in a bungalow in a former pit town in rural South Yorkshire.

Shameless Self Promotion[edit]


  1. Thomas Wentworth - dead Yorkshire politician
  2. Pulp - Sheffield band
  3. South Yorkshire - place in England
  4. User:Nommonomanac - hello
  5. Gong (band) - pixie-obsessed hippy outfit
  6. Gong mythology - a pixie obsession
  7. Band Aid (band) - charity supergroup
  8. Live Aid - a global jukebox
  9. Wentworth Woodhouse - a house in South Yorkshire
  10. Conisbrough - where my auntie lives
  11. Upper Derwent Valley - a place near Sheffield
  12. Mam Tor - a hill, not so far from Sheffield
  13. Humber Bridge - a great big bridge in Yorkshire
  14. Young British Artists - young British artists
  15. Brooklands - an autodrome from when motor sport was good
  16. Crazy Eights - the real blackjack
  17. Canal lock - how to get a river up a hill
  18. The Raincoats - if The Slits went to university
  19. Chesterfield Canal - a nearby waterway
  20. Maid Marian and her Merry Men - a children's television programme
  21. Worksop - the setting of the above, through which runs the canal that was above that
  22. Charles Watson-Wentworth - dead Yorkshire politician, related to the other one
  23. Joseph Nollekens - sculptor who was once employed by the above
  24. The Dam Busters (movie) - film made at the aforementioned Upper Derwent Valley
  25. Lapwing - a bird
  26. Rotherham - a town in South Yorkshire
  27. Public service broadcasting - what the BBC is meant to do
  28. Christmas cracker - something to pull
  29. Village green - a communal field
  30. Maypole - found in examples of the above
  31. Agricultural revolution - came before the Industrial revolution
  32. Open field system - came before the above
  33. AVUS - a really daft motor circuit
  34. Terence Donovan - a photographer
  35. David Bailey - another photographer
  36. Anston - a place in South Yorkshire
  37. Miniskirt - a fashion item
  38. Mary Quant - a fashion designer associated with the above
  39. Battle of Orgreave - an event that occurred in South Yorkshire
  40. Creswell Crags - a place near Worksop
  41. Castle Drogo - a castle in Devon
  42. Dodgy Dossier - current affairs
  43. September Dossier - BBC v government
  44. Death on the Rock - ITV v government
  45. Emley Moor - television transmitter
  46. Hutton Inquiry - more dossier related fun
  47. Tinsley viaduct - a double-decker bridge with added cooling towers
  48. Sheffield Town Hall - a town hall...
  49. Sheffield Rally - failure of the will?
  50. Cragside - an electric lighthouse of sorts
  51. Dinnington - a former pit town in rural South Yorkshire
  52. Tony Capstick - dead Yorkshire entertainer
  53. Stirling Prize - architecture thing
  54. Alan Holmes - mad Welsh bloke
  55. Robert Wyatt - hairy wheeled mole
  56. Woodsetts - a place in South Yorkshire
  57. Gildingwells - up the road from Woodsetts
  58. Letwell - up the road from Gildingwells
  59. Firbeck - up the road from Letwell
  60. Anthony St Leger - some bloke who lived in Firbeck
  61. Austerfield - a place in Doncaster
  62. Finningley - an airport with a village stuck to it
  63. Blaxton - north of Finningley
  64. Hatfield, South Yorkshire - a parish full of prisons
  65. Moorends - the pointy bit of a Thorne
  66. Sykehouse - empty space above Doncaster
  67. Fenwick - an empty space a bit to the left of the last one
  68. Norton, Doncaster, South Yorkshire - another place up there
  69. Hampole - and another
  70. Hooton Pagnell - up Barnsley way
  71. Clayton, South Yorkshire - a bit to the left
  72. Great Houghton - etc
  73. Brierley - dum de dee
  74. Shafton - tra la la
  75. Royston, South Yorkshire - fa da dum
  76. Staincross - ooby scooby
  77. Kexbrough - another one
  78. High Hoyland - falling off my map, alas
  79. Thorpe Salvin - down the bottom, going back the other way from Woodsetts
  80. Harthill - village of the Beehive
  81. Wales, South Yorkshire - iachid da
  82. Kiveton Park - cymydog o cymru
  83. Rother Valley College - a college near me
  84. Dinnington Comprehensive School - a school near me

External Links[edit]

  • To experience my less encyclopaedic contributions to society, click here.

All proclamations of Nommonomanac made through the Wikipedia are in the public domain:

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