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I am what is referred to as a polymath. I have many talents and I perform various functions without seeming to exert any effort.

The founding Core Principles by Jimmy Wales

The digitalindustry threepointsymbol - For Contribution to the future of humanity through honest and brave actions!
"I award this Resilient Barnstar to Wjhonson for his ability to cool down when attacked. When falsely accused and outnumbered, this User continues to fight for the truth on Wikipedia." Awarded, on my user:talk page 01:57, 10 February 2006 by User:Levine2112 (see user:talk history)

A Barnstar!
The Working Man's Barnstar

I, Xoloz, award Wjhonson this Working Man's Barnstar for his exceptional and creative problem-solving abilities (sometimes used in defense of cats!) Xoloz 15:59, 18 August 2006 (UTC)
This editor is a
Veteran Editor III
and is entitled to display this
Silver Editor Star

The first and only ArbCom case where I've been a party BlueMarine/Matt Sanchez

My edit count using as of 3 Apr 2013
Username Wjhonson
Total edits 16337 (Sixteen Thousand)
First edit Nov 11, 2003
Articles 10875 (Ten Thousand)
Talk 1628

Surreal Barnstar.png The Surreal Barnstar
cool editing

Warning: In my discussions, I constantly coin new words. You'll just have to follow along and make reasonble guesses.

My quick links[edit]

Some things about me (parody alert)[edit]

I reserve the right to parody any person I choose. If you think that I'm speaking of you, you probably are a bit too thin-skinned. I'm not talking about you.

  1. I know the true policies, if anyone has an interpretation of policy that contradicts mine, they are wrong and I am right.
  2. I am important because I have a stick. I have a stick because I am important. You had better watch yourself, or else I will use my stick.
  3. I get over a hundred thousand Googs (Google hits), I've been the subject of hundreds of independent comments by media, but I'm not notable. No not me, stop that! Don't make an article about me! I'm a private person! Just because I was kidnapped by aliens, ran the government of Argentina from my secret-bunker underground in Idaho, and once had twelve wives and fourteen sheep does not make me notable!
  4. Although I have acted in nine gay films (and one bisexual one, which proves I'm straight), and was a male prostitute for men until 2003 and ran a massage service catering to gay men until 2004, I'm not gay. Yes I'm not gay. I just happen to be that one man who can have sex with men and not be gay. It's true. What are you looking at?
  5. I am a tenured professor of religion at a private university with four Ph.D. degrees. My middle name is Rumpelstiltskin and I was the first white child born on the Moon.

More things about me (without any parody or trout)[edit]

  1. I try to be npov and shudder civil, sometimes I fail, and you can inform me when I do — children tattle — don't be a child. Here's a hint, tattlers run screaming to mommy every time someone pulls their hair. Responsible adults figure out other ways to deal with it. You're an adult. Act accordingly.
  2. Notability is not "I can find it in Google" nor is it "I can't". Historical figures of note are quite often not in Google because no one has yet taken the time to write something googleable. Google is highly skewed toward recent events, please note that. Wikipedia at one million articles can certainly handle one more on a person you personally have never heard of and can't google, and yet can be sourced. So take a pill.
  3. "Original research" is not the same thing as "research". If you can't comprehend that, you don't belong here.
  4. Quoting sources is a perfectly legitimate, biographical tool and does not constitute copyright infringement. Maybe you should go back to Copyright 101 and pay attention.
  5. I live in California — on the beach — because I found if I lived anywhere more tense I would probably end up in prison at some point.
  6. If your religion says your god-man did a miracle, that's what it says, it doesn't make it a fact. The proper way to express this npov would be "He is said to have done x" as opposed to "He did x". Class dismissed.
  7. I have started my first project Wikipedia:WikiProject_Wikipedians_for_local_history
  8. Something about WP:RS here

My etymology[edit]

I claim priority on coining certain words. Please note some of the words below require capitalization, while some do not.

  1. "wikinclusion", including an article in Wikipedia;
  2. "googs" to refer to "the number of Google hits something gets";
  3. "wikiceptable", acceptable to include in Wikipedia;Wikipedia_talk:Verifiability#Verifiabity_vs._Citability See here;
  4. "Wikiland", the land you've now entered, i.e. Wikipedia and its sister projects;
  5. "Wikispeak", the distinctive language that we speak in Wikiland, which is based on our policies, guidelines and procedures and their acronyms and shortcuts;
  6. "wikisense", whether something makes sense in Wikispeak;
  7. "wikiverse", the Wikipedia Universe;
  8. "out-world", the world outside Wikipedia; (see also out-blogs, out-space, out-verse, and out-life);
  9. "wikipoop", things deleted off Wikipedia;
  10. "wikicited", getting excited about something on Wikipedia;
  11. "consensucracy", an organization run by consensus;
  12. "Wikimopoly" the game... I mean project of creating Wikipedia

Boxes and Categories[edit]

CopyeditorIcon3.pngThis user was a member of the League of Copyeditors.
No-spam.svgThis user is a member of WikiProject Spam.
WikiOgre2.pngThis user is a WikiOgre.
Northwestern n logo.jpgThis user attends or attended Northwestern University.
Blue ribbon.svgThis user is a member of Wikipedians against censorship.
Celtic harp dsc05425.jpgThis user is a member of the Medieval Scotland WikiProject.
Wikipedia-Medcab.svgThis user was a volunteer mediator in the Mediation Cabal before it was closed.
LindisfarneFol27rIncipitMatt.jpgThis user is a member of the Middle Ages WikiProject.