Hello, I'm Debbie. Many of you have given your support and condolences to Jeffpw over the last many weeks since he lost Isaac. I'm Jeff's sister (and know nothing about Wikipedia, except that my brother enjoyed the site, the friendship and support).
I hope I'm going about this in the right way, if not, I'm so sorry.
My brother died yesterday- I suppose of a broken heart. But he recieved so much compassion from all of you, and you all made these last days (almost) bearable to him. I am so grateful to you and HE was so grateful. He intended to acknowledge each condolance sent to him individually, but since he can't, I thought I'd let you know.
There will be little rubs and disappointments everywhere, and we are all apt to expect too much; but then, if one scheme of happiness fails, human nature turns to another; if the first calculation is wrong, we make a second better: we find comfort somewhere. Jane Austen, Mansfield Park
- 1 My brother Jeff
- 2 Jeff...
- 3 In memoriam
- 4 To those who loved Jeff
- 5 A memorial and donation to IRQO
- 6 i simply cannot put it into words
- 7 A bit of Xmas cheer
- 8 Melt the clouds of sin and sadness, drive the dark of doubt away!
- 9 Goodbye, Jeff
- 10 RIP
- 11 A fitting Piece
- 12 Goodbye
- 13 Goodbye Jeff
- 14 LOVELESS(my final edit)
- 15 I Am So Sorry
- 16 Notes from Jeff's Mother, and she gave us a great photo of Jeff, too!
- 17 RIP
- 18 Wikipedians who did not know Jeffpw
- 19 THE DASH
- 20 Jeff
- 21 Things
- 22 Joan Didion portrait dedicated to Jeffpw's mother
- 23 Christmas message from Jeff's sister
- 24 Photo of Jeff on Happiness article
- 25 Walter Mosley photo dedicated to Jeff's Sister
- 26 My piece
- 27 To Jeff from Mom
- 28 "Devastated" is for once an appropriate word
- 29 Memorial
- 30 I Never Got to Say My Goodbye
- 31 Hi
- 32 Farewell Jeff
- 33 Hello friend
- 34 One year
- 35 I just met you
- 36 My condolences from Indonesia and its Wikipedia
- 37 Oh, for crying out loud
- 38 One
- 39 Farewell
- 40 Nearly two years on
- 41 My thoughts will be here from now on
- 42 Message from Eleanor, Jeff's mom, as the two year anniversary of his passing approaches
- 43 Sadly ...
- 44 Just checkin' in, Jeff
- 45 That reminds me
- 46 I miss you
- 47 In remembrance
- 48 Something about you...
- 49 Something Jeff might have appreciated
- 50 Been a long time
- 51 Not forgotten ...
- 52 Remembering Jeff
- 53 Never met you, still remember you
- 54 You came to mind today
- 55 Eighth anniversary
I just wanted to say hello again and good-bye. My brother Jeff was laid to rest in the same grave as Isaac on Friday. It was the hardest and best thing I ever did for my brother. He was amazing. This I knew. But I never knew so many others did as well. His candle burned bright his whole life, it just burned out too soon. The ceremony was packed with little room left. All his nursing peers, his Dutch family, friends, neighbors, my husband and myself. Of course the first song we played was "Somewhere Over the Rainbow", which is where I believe he is now. Then "My Way" by Shirley Bassey. I wasn't a big fan before, but I swear that song was written just for him! And can she belt it out! I also found in his home a letter from him to her and one from her back to him, I almost missed it. For those of you who thought you should have known, NO ONE, not even the people who saw him the most, noticed anything different about him. This was just a terrible and tragic accident. All of us who knew him best knows that he would have choreographed every last detail if it wasn't. They're together forever now, and I thank you all for your kindness and support to him and to me and my family. Jeffssister (talk) 17:04, 17 August 2008 (UTC)jeffssister
My brother Jeff
Hi, I'm Debbie, Jeff's sister. Our mom, Eleanor is here with me. We just wanted to let you know that Jeffpw died yesterday. His Wikipedia friends (and I hope this is the correct way to do this)were so supportive of him these past weeks and he appreciated you all so much. He had intended to personally respond to each of your emails, when he could. So we're doing that now. Thank you all for being a friend to someone we love so much.
Dear Debbie and Eleanor;
My heart goes out to you and your family, and my thoughts and prayers are with you. I once helped Jeff with an article he was writing, and for that simple task, I gained a solid friend, who was always around to support and defend me from there forward. I never spoke to him "in real life", but he did send me his phone number after Isaac died. Now that I read back through my e-mail and talk page messages, I am garnering the idea that Jeff intentionally told me, more than once, that he was fine and healthy, when in fact, he may have been protecting and shielding me from the truth about his health, always with a kind word, a joke, something to cheer me up or make my day. He assured me that he was fine, more than once. If he did that on purpose, to spare me from worry, it was a generous and selfless act of friendship, and I'm sorry I couldn't have been there for him more fully. You have a fine son and brother, a person to be proud of. My kindest regards, SandyGeorgia (Talk) 23:47, 8 August 2008 (UTC)
- Dear Debbie and Eleanor,
- I am so so sorry for your loss of Jeff. I have known him for a while on Wikipedia and spoke with him some on the phone after Isaac's death, and I know how that grieved him. I know words can not express the depths of grief adequately. You and Jeff are in my heart. He was a kind-hearted man. This is a sad day for all of us. Aleta Sing 23:52, 8 August 2008 (UTC)
- I'm bawling. I don't see the point in continuing to edit ridiculously unimportant Wikipedia articles. Jeff was loved. He is still loved. Both on wikipedia, and in the real world. It is so evident to me that he loved Isaac, and Issac loved him. I'm so very sad, and I want this to be untrue.....I'm going on a break to re-evaluate what exactly I'm doing here. Jeff was so necessary (what's the word? that's not the word...), he was so essential to this project. I'm going offline, I already miss Jeff....Keeper ǀ 76 00:25, 9 August 2008 (UTC)
I would like to extend my sympathy to jeffpw's family and friends, he was a fine wikipedian and, although I didn't do a lot of work with him personaly I was always aware of the outstanding contributions he made to the project and the community. It is very rare for anyone to be as highly regarded and valued as Jeff was. His passing is a tragic loss to us all and my thoughts are with you, Debbie, Eleanor, and your family. May he rest in peace PiTalk - Contribs 00:26, 9 August 2008 (UTC)
I am stunned and very sad to read this. Jeff was a fine person, with integrity and a sense of humor. It was just a few weeks ago that we were trying to console him for his loss here and in private email - despite his grief he managed to reply to a note I sent him, with his customary grace. My condolences to those who loved him - please know that those who worked with him here will remember him. Tvoz/talk 03:56, 12 August 2008 (UTC)
Miss Julie, you ass. You missed my article. I wrote it for you and for WP:LGBT because the stupid crap we have to go through just to prove we're Wikipedians and the articles we concentrate on are important. I'm really proud of that article, and now I'm really fucking sad.
- Queens certainly do. This queen already misses Jeff. Say "Hi" to Isäac for me. -- SatyrTN (talk / contribs) 00:59, 9 August 2008 (UTC)
- Add my name to the list of queens who are going to miss Jeff's humor and wit. APK is gonna miss Jeffpw 10:07, 9 August 2008 (UTC)
I am in shock. Jeff told me that he couldn't bear living without Isaac, but I didn't think he would actually go. I can't believe it. Dev920 (Have a nice day!) 20:13, 12 August 2008 (UTC)
- I just went and told my mother. We had the privilege of actually meeting Jeff when he flew over to London to go to a Westlife concert with us. He was just as funny, kind, and bitchy in real life as he was here. When I wanted to go to Wikimania in Taiwan he offered to go with me just so he could be sure I stayed safe (he didn't care about the meeting, he was planning to lounge by the pool the entire time). I feel so awful that I last spoke to him two weeks ago and now I can't ever again... Dev920 (Have a nice day!) 20:27, 12 August 2008 (UTC)
- There are quite a few people who are rather wrought with guilt over Jeff's death. This is what made me so shocked and angry at hearing this news. If only we had done something different... Dev, I still feel guilty for saying this, but he was not your responsibility and more than he was mine. Any more than anyone on Wikipedia is responsible for my own happiness or sadness. For such a hollow sense of loss, you could not have filled it, and neither could I. Nor any of us all put together. --Moni3 (talk) 20:32, 12 August 2008 (UTC)
- I know, I know. But knowing that doesn't make me feel any less bad, and knowing that doesn't stem my flow of tears. It was Jeff making me feel guilty that I joined WP:LGBT in the first place two years ago. We were both so enthusiastic about Wikipedia back then... Dev920, who misses Jeffpw. 21:13, 12 August 2008 (UTC)
- There are quite a few people who are rather wrought with guilt over Jeff's death. This is what made me so shocked and angry at hearing this news. If only we had done something different... Dev, I still feel guilty for saying this, but he was not your responsibility and more than he was mine. Any more than anyone on Wikipedia is responsible for my own happiness or sadness. For such a hollow sense of loss, you could not have filled it, and neither could I. Nor any of us all put together. --Moni3 (talk) 20:32, 12 August 2008 (UTC)
I did it. Since you can't... won't... read it, I hope someone else can. I'm an idiot to think if someone did they might last one more week to find something else to live for. --Moni3 (talk) 04:44, 4 October 2008 (UTC)
- Nothing else to say. Miss you Jeff. Peace be with you, kind soul....Keeper ǀ 76 00:34, 9 August 2008 (UTC)
- Que se descansa en paz. Yo tendria todos los desacuerdos con usted otra vez sin pensar ni un momento. La vida esta echaa de3 amor y lucha. Granny, who died in the last month, always wanted to be with papa, who died years ago. I travelled 6000 miles to be with her and we all kept calling the funeral a wedding. The dead spirits are the strongest. Thanks, SqueakBox 00:38, 9 August 2008 (UTC)
- My god. Jeff....no. :( AgneCheese/Wine 02:27, 9 August 2008 (UTC)
- I had hoped that events might have unfolded overnight to be different. At least you are with Isaac now, and from that we can take comfort. Miss you Jeff. 08:46, 9 August 2008 (UTC)
- I remember this guy from a while back. Always seemed a great person with a kind spirit. Rest in peace amigo. You will be sorely missed by those who care for you. My thoughts are with the family. Best "Talk"? 16:21, 9 August 2008 (UTC)
- I can't believe this is happening. I was only speaking with him two weeks back. My sincere condolences to your family. Man, I'm going to miss you, Jeff. You were a great guy - Alison ❤ 19:23, 9 August 2008 (UTC)
- I am very saddened by this. You've always been a kind editor, and I remember your kindness from when I was new around here: you influenced me to continue and improve. As well as your kindness and good work, I'll be sure to remember this post of yours on my talk page, which was a very nice thing that you said there. I will miss you and your work. Acalamari 20:56, 9 August 2008 (UTC)
- Goodbye Jeff (we share first names). Tell Isaac I wish I met him. --I'm an Editorofthewiki 20:57, 9 August 2008 (UTC)
- My heart is broken. My sincere condolences to the family. Jeff shall be missed. Raystorm (¿Sí?) 22:32, 9 August 2008 (UTC)
- My condolences go out to Jeff's friends and family. Rest Well Jeff. :( - NeutralHomer talk|edits 22:33, 9 August 2008 (UTC)
- I can't say I interacted with Jeffpw, but it was a name I recognised and respected. LessHeard vanU (talk) 22:46, 9 August 2008 (UTC)
- We'll all miss you a lot Jeff. Peace be with you, and strength to your family. --Rodhullandemu 22:50, 9 August 2008 (UTC)
- My thoughts too. The commonly said phrase now cracks a noble heart. Good night sweet prince, and flights of angels sing thee to thy rest! seems to be especially relevant. Sceptre (talk) 22:54, 9 August 2008 (UTC)
- As someone who has never met or encountered Jeffpw, I am at a loss. He sounds like he was a wonderful man, and with over 9000 edits to his Username, I am sure he will be very severely missed here. My thoughts are with his family and relations. God Speed, Jeffpw... Go where the wind may take you. Thor Malmjursson (talk) 22:58, 9 August 2008 (UTC)
- Descanse en paz.--Ensada (talk) 23:10, 9 August 2008 (UTC)
- My condolenses to Jeff's family and friends. --220.127.116.11 (talk) 23:16, 9 August 2008 (UTC)
- I'm going to maintain Gay icon in Jeff's honor. Hopefully one day it will be a featured article. Best Wishes. The Bookkeeper (of the Occult) 00:22, 10 August 2008 (UTC)
- You are reunited at last. Peace be with you and best wishes to your family, you will be missed dearly. Orderinchaos 01:42, 10 August 2008 (UTC)
- "Everything was beautiful, and nothing hurt." - Kurt Vonnegut. Goodbye, Jeff. Qb | your 2 cents 02:05, 10 August 2008 (UTC)
- If tears can build a stairway, and memories a lane. I'd walk right up to heaven and bring you home again. May the memories comfort those of you who knew him better than I did. I met him on Wiki only briefly following his loss of Isaac, but I won't forget him. I was sad to learn this news. Thank you for letting his friends here know. TravellingCari 04:17, 10 August 2008 (UTC)
- oh my god. i have now said that seventeen times in rapid succession. oh, jeff.i have lost someone i loved as well. i pray--for my sake as well as for Jeff's--that there is a reunion in the afterworld that makes all these hours and years of suffering worthwhile. (jeff? if you're listening? please tell my love that i miss him.) you will never in a million years know how sorry i am to hear this...and i never met either of them. My condolences to your family. Jeff will be missed. ah, dammit.Gladys J Cortez 05:14, 10 August 2008 (UTC)
- Goodbye to a decent, funny and kind man, someone who made Wikipedia a more human, and humane place. DuncanHill (talk) 09:06, 10 August 2008 (UTC)
- My path only crossed with Jeff's a few times, but every time it did I was impressed by his wisdom, his wit, and his enthusiasm. The world is a better place because he was in it, if only for a short while. --jonny-mt 09:20, 10 August 2008 (UTC)
- I only met Jeff recently, but I am shocked and saddened. My sincerest condolences. Siawase (talk) 19:12, 10 August 2008 (UTC)
- Wishing your family and everyone who admired you the best. Rest in peace fellow wikian. <3 Tinkleheimer TALK!! 19:51, 10 August 2008 (UTC)
- I am so very sorry to hear this news. I read Isaac's memorial page last month and it is just heartbreaking to learn that Jeff is gone as well. All my love and condolence to their famil(ies) and please know that they will be remembered here. --MCB (talk) 19:56, 10 August 2008 (UTC)
- I remember meeting Jeff when we had a disagreement with the Judy Garland article over a year ago. Thankfully it's an FA now. My deepest condolences. miranda 23:52, 10 August 2008 (UTC)
- Wikipedia is less now. --maclean 00:02, 11 August 2008 (UTC)
- Miss you so much, Jeff. We shall keep you in our thoughts forever. --PeaceNT (talk) 02:42, 11 August 2008 (UTC)
- I'm going to blatantly steal your own words to me - "...You and others have helped me enormously, and made me see clearly that we at Wikipedia re more than anonymous editors, but a family who helps each other." So, it's a family table with an empty seat, an un-raised glass, and an uncomfortable empty feeling. Via con dios, my friend. Fair winds and following seas, and all that - and my thoughts and prayers with your family, as well - and may I also note the breadth of love shown here, and that it's people from all over the world, old and young, who were touched by Jeff's work and presence here. UltraExactZZ Claims ~ Evidence 03:30, 11 August 2008 (UTC)
- Thank you for helping Wikipedia, Jeff. To friends and family, he was a valued editor here. Respected and admired. We'll miss him greatly and were glad to have him among us. Peace and strength, DurovaCharge! 05:22, 11 August 2008 (UTC)
- Baruch Dayan Ha Emes. What sad news! Jeff's absence will be felt within our community! For his family and close friends, may you be comforted by sweet memories. --MPerel 05:36, 11 August 2008 (UTC)
- It's sad to see another Wikipedian leave our community and my thoughts are with Jeff's family and close friends during this time of loss. You will be missed by many. — E ↗TCB 05:52, 11 August 2008 (UTC)
- I remember seeing Jeff around once or twice in my work around the encyclopaedia. My condolences to all of his friends and family, and anyone else who may be grieving for him at this point in time. 08:32, 11 August 2008 (UTC)
- - Take care, buddy. We'll all miss you very much. ScarianCall me Pat! 10:05, 11 August 2008 (UTC)
- How could it happen again? Poor guy. At least we know that you and Isaac will be happy together. You are forever remembered jeff. --Meldshal 12:41, 11 August 2008 (UTC)
- Now, my own tribute to Jeff. I didn't know him that well, but that doesn't matter. Jeffpw, I admired you from afar, you being everything on the "Wikispecies" chart, WikiDragon, WikiElf, everything. And as for your work, I see all your efforts; you gave LGBT studies a new look. Thanks for everything, Jeff. --Meldshal 13:41, 11 August 2008 (UTC)
- This is very unfortunate, and my thoughts are with Jeff's family and relatives. Your work on Wikipedia, especially within the field of LGBT, is one that cannot be replaced. seicer | talk | contribs 16:17, 11 August 2008 (UTC)
- You'll be missed, Jeffpw. My thoughts are with your family and friends. :( Nishkid64 (Make articles, not wikidrama) 18:39, 11 August 2008 (UTC)
- I may have interacted with you only a few times on Wikipedia, but I was familiar with your work, mostly on WP:ANI. To Jeff's family, my prayers and thoughts go to you in this time of grief, may the memories of your lost one comfort you. Wildthing61476 (talk) 18:57, 11 August 2008 (UTC)
- You'll be missed. =( D.M.N. (talk) 19:19, 11 August 2008 (UTC)
- Not that you will be reading this (everyone knows that Wikipedia is Purgatory, not Heaven), but I do hope you have found peace, Jeff. I am better for having known you. - Arcayne (cast a spell) 20:44, 11 August 2008 (UTC)
- Ohh this is so tragic. I read the memorial page dedicated to Isaac and it made me so terribly sad. I just couldn't imagine how life would be if my life's love was to die. When I saw the note from Jeff's sister, I wanted to believe it was a joke, that life wasn't so cruel. I can't explain this. I never knew you, but your personality shined right through your contributions, so loving, kind, and warm. You seemed so strong, even though you were dealing with the unbearable. To Jeff's family, you're in my thoughts and I hope you can find sunshine in your hearts again one day. Seraphim♥Whipp 23:15, 11 August 2008 (UTC)
- I'm shocked and disappointed. My condolences to his family, friends, and colleagues. Masterpiece2000 (talk) 05:01, 12 August 2008 (UTC)
- Once, I thought, that the worst was a 'ban';
- But nothing like losing a kindhearted man.
- I will no longer stress over trivial things;
- Knowing that you, Jeff, have earned your bright wings. - the_undertow 18.104.22.168 (talk) 06:01, 12 August 2008 (UTC)
- My condolences and best wishes to his friends and family. Godspeed, Jeff. Shereth 20:47, 12 August 2008 (UTC)
- Didn't know him well, but my few interactions with him were all pleasant. To his family, I am very sorry for your loss. ATren (talk) 05:39, 13 August 2008 (UTC)
- John Donne said it best:""All mankind is of one author, and is one volume; when one man dies, one chapter is not torn out of the book, but translated into a better language; and every chapter must be so translated...As therefore the bell that rings to a sermon, calls not upon the preacher only, but upon the congregation to come: so this bell calls us all: but how much more me, who am brought so near the door by this sickness....No man is an island, entire of itself...any man's death diminishes me, because I am involved in mankind; and therefore never send to know for whom the bell tolls; it tolls for thee." My deepest sympathy. Edison (talk) 06:28, 13 August 2008 (UTC)
- My condolences go out to the family. You will be missed Jeff. --Chet B. LongTalk/ARK 19:00, 13 August 2008 (UTC)
- Speechless. Jeff, I looked up your user page to see what you were doing, just so because I always thought you are a great person and Wikipedian. This is too sad, you'll be remembered and missed. user:Everyme 17:55, 14 August 2008 (UTC)
- "the love is appreciated". Those were the last words he wrote on Wikipedia. It's unlogical to think that unplanned lasts words are always more special than others. But sometimes, they happen to be. Hmm... ain't it funny how things go? - Face 23:02, 15 August 2008 (UTC)
- Be at peace. Ecoleetage (talk) 02:08, 16 August 2008 (UTC)
- Be happier. Marlith (Talk) 15:50, 16 August 2008 (UTC)
- I never got the chance to work with you. But from what i've seen, we would have got on very well together. You're a credit to this project and will be missed by all of us! R.I.P Jeff John Sloan (talk) 12:16, 21 August 2008 (UTC)
- Rest well Jeff, from all I have heard and read about you, you seem like a great an awesome guy. I would have liked to know you. I can see that you were a champion to many a great causes and to ones that needed it most. May your kinds words and thoughts live on forever and ever. My your heart or hearts beat on and on providing an inspiration for and touch more then anyones expectations to that like. Elanor and Debbie know that my thoughts and prayers are there with you now and always. Physco219 (talk) 15:22, 23 August 2008 (UTC) —15:17, 23 August 2008 (UTC)
- Your sense of humor and peaceful attitude will be sorely missed, Jeff. - Philippe 16:25, 23 August 2008 (UTC)
- While I can't say I ever knew Jeff, I certainly saw him around. My deepest sympathy goes to Debbie and Eleanor, and to the rest of Jeff's family at this hard time. :'( Stwalkerster [ talk ] 17:37, 23 August 2008 (UTC)
- I hope you and Isaac are together now, Jeff. Thank you for sharing yourself with us. Wildhartlivie (talk) 03:49, 2 September 2008 (UTC)
- Om Namah Shivaya. Om Namah Shivaya. Om Namah Shivaya. May your soul rest in piece. 22.214.171.124 (talk) 14:22, 2 October 2008 (UTC)
- Wow, this is sad. I've been away for a while and didn't know about this. My condolences. Quadzilla99 (talk) 07:22, 27 September 2010 (UTC)
- Now it's 3 years of your death, and i just know about it, Today. I'm really silly.
May you rest in peace. My condolence, , A 12 Years-old kid and Indonesian Wikipedia user who misses Jeff, on 12:58, 11 September 2011 (UTC)
To those who loved Jeff
All Is Well
Death is nothing at all,
I have only slipped away into the next room, I am I and you are you,
Whatever we were to each other, that we are still.
Call me by my old familiar name,
Speak to me in the easy way which you always used.
Put no difference in your tone,
Wear no forced air of solemnity or sorrow, laugh as we always laughed at the little jokes we enjoyed together.
Play, smile, think of me, pray for me.
Let my name be ever the household word that it always was, let it be spoken without effort, without the trace of shadow on it.
Life means all that it ever meant.
It is the same as it ever was, there is unbroken continuity.
Why should I be out of mind because I am out of sight?
I am waiting for you, for an interval, somewhere very near, just around the corner.
All is well…
My deepest, most heart-felt condolences. Take solace, if you can, in knowing that he is once again in the arms of his beloved Isaac. (Known to Jeff as LaraLove) Jennavecia (Talk) 06:09, 10 August 2008 (UTC)
A memorial and donation to IRQO
I have written a tribute to Jeff on my blog. I'm also going to donate $500 to the Iranian Queer Organisation, which was one of Jeff's favourite charities. I would be delighted if others will join me. Dev920, who misses Jeffpw. 22:22, 12 August 2008 (UTC)
- My tribute to Jeff has moved - my donation to IRQO was gratefully received and I think Jeff would have been rather pleased with how many Iranians they've helped out with it. I get badgered with emails about people they're saving all the time. :) Ah Jeff, I miss you. It isn't quite the same anymore coming on Wikipedia and discovering you haven't managed to get yourself into another cranky mess. Mona has taken over the newsletter now and I think you'd rather agree with me that it kicks ass. Miss Julie would be proud... Dev920, who misses Jeffpw. 20:48, 7 December 2008 (UTC)
i simply cannot put it into words
there are simply no words that can describe what i am feeling right now. i loved jeff sincerely... and i had even promised him that i would go over and visit him when i was old enough... now i will never be able to fulfill that promise.
from the context of jeff's emails, i came to understand he was in a very unhappy place since the death of his husband, but always tried to hide it somewhat on wikipedia. however, he had always said that he would would just get on and do what he enjoyed doing - work, and this would help take his mind off it all. upon hearing suicidal comments, i vowed to him to do everything within my power to stop such an event from occuring. it seems this is another promise that i failed him on.
jeff was an amazing person. apart from enjoying wikipedia, he lived a happy life with his husband. he liked going to see a film every week in his local cinema... and i remember we would often talk to eachother about what films he had enjoyed. i used to look forward to receiving my email from jeff, and would frequently visit my inbox solely for him...
jeff turned me from the brattish, immature, and disruptive child i was, into a more mature, and more adult person. in fact, jeff is even responsible for me being alive today... i was once in a very low place, and through jeff's caring for me one night via email, he saved me from in fact taking my own life. i feel guilty that he did this for me, yet i have been unable to help him out of his low time.
i would not be who i am today if it were not for jeff, and he was patient with me throughout my childish antics on wikipedia, and even after i was banned, he still tried to help me.
i am now unable to repay him for all that he has done, and i will always feel sorrow for this.
i love you jeff :( x
- I had no idea. We used to e-mail each other, and it was clear he was upset, but I had no idea. What a lesson in how powerless we are to know each other, and to help each other, when we are so far apart. I would do his spirit an injustice if I did not mention that he was deeply troubled by the toxic environment he had to battle here at Wikipedia, and that it haunted his last messages to me. But I never imagined for a moment he would take his own life. I am so sorry, Jeff, you were a real man in a hall of ghosts, you had passion and truth in your fiber, I feel lonely and poor without you. Haiduc (talk) 01:21, 16 August 2008 (UTC)
A bit of Xmas cheer
Well Miss Julie I guess I'll have to slog on without but it sure won't be as fun. I really don't do death well but camp is another thing completely. And nothing is more camp than Christmas so here's a Xmas-y clip to warm your cockles and the diamonds and sable you hinted at - well I hope these will do for now...
I'll always treasure the bridges we built and snipets of humaness we shared. Your candor, grace and class really stunk up the place in all the right ways and your absence is our loss. Be with your love and find peace in the rest. Somehow all the manure that is flung eventually feeds a new batch of flowers so I may just drop by to show you what has sprung up in the garden or share some more beefcake serving suggestions. Banjeboi 06:21, 16 August 2008 (UTC)
Melt the clouds of sin and sadness, drive the dark of doubt away!
I only knew you online, but I knew you as a kind, funny, dedicated person. My favorite exchange with you was this one. I have to trust that you and Isaac are together and happy again now. -FisherQueen (talk · contribs) 16:08, 16 August 2008 (UTC)
The wikipedia community has lost one of its most shining members, rest in peace. Oh, dear, what comfort can I find? None this tide, Nor any tide, Except he did not shame his kind My Boy Jack (1916), Rudyard Kipling Citedcover (talk) 10:37, 17 August 2008 (UTC)
- This is rather gutting. Spoke to Jeff via email a few times, and he was a top notch guy - real honest, fair, and compassionate. It's a great loss to Wikipedia, and I wish I could have gotten to know Jeff better. Hope you're in a better place. No other words come to mind really, and I don't think any words can do justice. LuciferMorgan (talk) 23:06, 20 August 2008 (UTC)
A fitting Piece
I don't know why, but this just came to my head and seemed fitting. i mean some parts did, not all of them, especially not the devil one. Goodbye Jeff, I'll miss you. --Meldshal42? 22:45, 19 August 2008 (UTC)
This needs no fancy dress up, it is straight and to the point. Thanks Jeff.
Bohemian Rhapsody, by Queen
I am deeply saddened to find that Jeff is gone. Jeff was one of the first editors here that I got to know and made me feel welcome. He could be grumpy and irascible at times but he had a great sense of fun and friendship. He stuck at his work on this project in spite of the things that frustrated him at times. He always expressed to me a strong belief in Wikipedia's goals.
On a purely personal level, I am now left to wonder who will correct those little mistakes in my pompous comments that threaten to make me look truly ridiculous ;-).
Jeff, I realize you can't actually read this but nonetheless I need to say this. I'm profoundly and truly sorry that it never occurred to me that there were things far more important than what goes on here. I feel terribly bad about letting a petty dispute over a banned editor get in the way of a friendship with the one person here who I truly admired. Real life matters so much more than Wikipedia. Sorry Jeff. EconomicsGuy (talk) 12:48, 29 August 2008 (UTC)
LOVELESS(my final edit)
Prologue (Story) When the war of the beasts brings about the world’s end The goddess descends from the sky
Wings of light and dark spread afar She guides us to bliss, her gift everlasting
Prologue (Poem) When the war of the beasts brings about the world’s end The goddess descends from the sky Wings of light and dark spread afar She guides us to bliss, her gift everlasting
Act I (Story) The infinite mystery The gift of the goddess is what the three men seek But their fates are scattered by war
One becomes a hero, one wanders the land And the last is taken prisoner
But the three are still bound by a solemn oath To seek the answer together, once again
Act I (Poem) Infinite in mystery is the gift of the goddess We seek it thus, and take it to the sky Ripples form on the water’s surface The wandering soul knows no rest.
Act II (Story) Though the prisoner escapes, he is gravely wounded His life is saved, however By a woman of the opposing nation
He begins a life of seclusion with her Which seems to hold the promise of eternal bliss
But as happiness grows, so does guilt Of not fulfilling the oath to his friends
Act II (Poem) There is no hate, only joy For you are beloved by the goddess Hero of the dawn, Healer of worlds
Dreams of the morrow hath the shattered soul Pride is lost Wings stripped away, the end is nigh
Act III (Story) As the war sends the world hurtling towards destruction The prisoner departs with his newfound love And embarks on a new journey
He is guided by hope that the gift will bring bliss And the oath that he swore to his friends
Though no oath is shared between the lovers In their hearts they know they will meet again
Act III (Poem) My friend, do you fly away now? To a world that abhors you and I? All that awaits you is a somber morrow No matter where the winds may blow
My friend, your desire Is the bringer of life, the gift of the goddess
Even if the morrow is barren of promises Nothing shall forestall my return
Act IV (Poem) My friend, the fates are cruel There are no dreams, no honor remains The arrow has left the bow of the goddess
My soul, corrupted by vengeance Hath endured torment, to find the end of the journey In my own salvation And your eternal slumber
Legend shall speak Of sacrifice at world’s end The wind sails over the water’s surface Quietly, but surely
I Am So Sorry
I have avoided logging onto Wikipedia for ages because I have become very disillusioned by it, but I felt I *had* to log on to extend my condolences to the family of Jeffpw for the loss of one of the most helpful and personable editors I ever encountered. He assisted me greatly -- and with great kindness -- with a Scars article I had some trouble with getting off the ground and it is largely because of his efforts that it looks the way it does at present. I was still a nascent Wikipedia editor when he stepped in to help and he was one of the people who made me stay for as long as I did. I am sad I never got the opportunity to get to know him, but from looking over some of the other things he did on this site he seemed like an extremely helpful and kind editor, the kind which is dearly lacking on this site. I will never forget Jeffpw's kindness and extend my deep sorrow and sadness about his passing. He was and is forevermore a Wikipedia angel. Krushsister (talk) 06:30, 3 September 2008 (UTC)
Notes from Jeff's Mother, and she gave us a great photo of Jeff, too!
Jeff's mother, Eleanor, is an amazing woman. First, Jeff got his writing skills from her; she communicates beautifully. We have corresponded three or four times each today, and reading her prose is like ice cream to those who love a finely composed sentence. I asked her of I could share her letters, and she said yes.
I also would like to add she was truly touched by this outpouring. She is going through a difficult time, and she expressed that corresponding with me about Jeff was the first time she has smiled in a month. I strongly encourage you that if you knew Jeff or loved him and his presence, I will forward your letter to her, and I bet she'll respond. If you do not feel comfortable doing that, just ping my e-mail and I will forward your address. She seems to be enjoying the company of those who knew Jeff through something he loved so deeply: Wikipedia.
from Eleanor S. <eleanorsil@XXXXXX>
to Shankbone <email@example.com>
date Fri, Sep 5, 2008 at 12:45 PM
subject Jeff Woloson
I'm Eleanor Silvers, Jeff's mom. I have your e-mail addy from when Jeff sent us all the wonderful photos from the Tunick event.
Jeff spoke so often of you, and even sent me a picture of you, because he thought you were pretty good looking. :) He really loved you. I wasn't aware that you two were on the outs when he died. I'm sorry for that. Isn't there some kind of irony that your falling out was over Santa Claus? I don't even know how to put it into words.
He talked to me all the time about the gratitude list, and how much it meant to him. I didn't know until I read your wiki piece that you were the one who'd invited him to be part of it.
Thank you for that.
It was weird and interesting to read the lists of his that you posted. But I loved being able to read them. I don't know if you know about his estranged relationship with his father or not, but I was appalled to read that in August was the first time his father had called him all year. He always told me it didn't matter, that his father was irrelevant to his life, but of course it did matter, and that's what made it so sad.
The main reason I'm writing is to thank you for all the things you said about Jeff.
But now that I am writing, I'm also wondering if you have any other gratitude lists of his that you'd be willing to share with me?
Tomorrow it will be one month since he died. I'm just finding this so hard to accept, and I'm so glad that I saved so many of his e-mails. I really don't know how one survives something like this.
Please write to me if you feel like it. I feel like I know you.
--David Shankbone 02:42, 6 September 2008 (UTC)
- After some effort, Wikipedia has improved the image of Jeff in Thailand. Huge thanks to Kamangir1214 and ZooFari for their efforts. -- Suntag ☼ 18:48, 20 December 2008 (UTC)
Wikipedians who did not know Jeffpw
- I did not know Jeffpw, but feel very touched that his family requested that Jeffpw's page be preserved to honor his memory. They will always be welcome to come to Wikipedia and read Jeffpw's post and feel what he felt at a specific moment in time when he was alive. It makes me feel good to contribute to something that can be preserved to give comfort to Jeffpw's loved ones. I'm glad I found this page. -- Suntag (talk) 04:28, 13 September 2008 (UTC)
- Thank you for remembering Jeffpw in this way. Though I didn't know him I'm glad to find this site and hope it gives some comfort to people who did. Requiescat in pace, Jeff. Julia Rossi (talk) 05:48, 13 September 2008 (UTC)
I read of a man who stood to speak at the funeral of his friend.
He referred to the dates on her tombstone from the beginning to the end.
He noted that first came the date of her birth and spoke of the second with tears,
but he said that what mattered most of all was the dash between those' years.
For that dash represents all the time that she spent alive on earth,
and now only those who loved her know what that little line is worth.
For it matters not, how much we own, the cars, the house, the cash.
What matters is how we live and love and how we spend our dash.
So think about this long and hard, are there things you'd like to change?
For you never know how much time is left. (You could be at "dash mid¬range.")
If we could just slow down enough to consider what's true and what's real,
and always try to understand the way other people feel.
And be less quick to anger, and show appreciation more
and love the people in our lives like we've never loved before.
If we treat each other with respect, and more often wear a smile,
remembering that this special dash might only last a little while.
So, when your eulogy is being read with your life's actions to rehash.
Would you be pleased with the things they have to say
I've been thinking about you lately Jeff. You are still missed. My time on-wiki is likely drawing to a close in the next few weeks for reasons out of my control, and I was reflecting on the good things about this website. You are one of the good things about this website, and I miss you and your humor. Keeper ǀ 76 20:43, 25 September 2008 (UTC)
Joan Didion portrait dedicated to Jeffpw's mother
With her blessing, I dedicated the Didion portrait shot to Jeffpw's mom. Anyone familiar with Didion's work will immediately know why. --David Shankbone 03:23, 14 November 2008 (UTC)
Christmas message from Jeff's sister
My first Sinterklaas poem
I love you Isaac and I love you Jeff, you've no idea the void you've left. I struggle every day and night to try to put what's wrong to right. I hope you feel our love for you, and know that we feel your love too!
Happy Sinterklaas you guys.... I miss you and love you so much, Boo-boo's idwy- pookie ````Jeffssister
Photo of Jeff on Happiness article
The photo to the left is found on the Happiness article. The main driver behind this was Suntag ☼, with edits by ZooFari and Kamangir1214. Jeff's mother, Eleanor, wanted me to express how thankful, inspired and happy she was to not only see the improvements to her favorite photo of Jeff, but also to see it on such an article. --David Shankbone 03:08, 27 December 2008 (UTC)
Walter Mosley photo dedicated to Jeff's Sister
With her blessing, I dedicated the Mosley portrait to Jeffpw's sister. --David Shankbone 03:08, 27 December 2008 (UTC)
Jeffpw, you were such a great help in the Benniguy situation over on the Simple English Wikipedia that I have honored your wishes and have gotten your userpage and user talk page over on the Simple English Wikipedia protected for you after death. You were a great user and I will miss you terribly. Godspeed, Razorflame 16:46, 29 January 2009 (UTC)
To Jeff from Mom
It's been 6 months today since you left us, Jeff. I don't understand how that can be, but that's what the calendar says, so it must be so. I hope you know how bereft I am and how empty my life is without you. Love, Mommy
This message was transmitted at the request of Jeff's Mom by David Shankbone 22:35, 6 February 2009 (UTC)
"Devastated" is for once an appropriate word
I was away from WP for quite a while. Once I got back onto broadband I did various Wikithings, and after a while I wondered why I'd not seen anything from Jeffpw. To cut a long story short I found this page. My apologies, therefore, for my late contribution.
I know it's fashionable for people to describe themselves as "devastated" when they mean "mildly put out" ("I was devastated when I had to wait two hours for another flight") but on reading of Jeff I found the news truly devastating. I never met him IRL but if his behaviour on WP was anything like his behaviour in the real world he was a true gem, and the world is sadly darkened by his passing. People with his blend of good humour, good sense, good manners and good friendship don't come along too often. May the Goddess smile upon him, and upon Isaac. Tonywalton Talk 00:50, 18 March 2009 (UTC)
I never knew Jeffpw, in real life or on Wikipedia, but it saddens nearly everyone involved with this project to know that a fellow wikipedian has died. RIP - Nz26 | Talk | Contribs | Email 11:15, 10 April 2009 (UTC)
I Never Got to Say My Goodbye
It seems like I never even met you on Wikipedia. And right now I feel so insignificant. People loved you man. You had something I don't know I'll ever be able to gain from Wikipedia...respect and trust. Do you remember when we fought? Yeah me too. I was so immature, and I feel so terrible inside. I almost feel like I was your cause of death. That I dare approach you the way I did. And that we would clash heads like that so close to your loved one's death. I am so sorry. But then I look at those thousands of people who have said goodbye. Each and everyone of them, nothing. A spec to be flicked from your shoulder. And I can't help but feel I'm apart of that spec. How I would have loved to be your son. A loving father I have, but he probably would never be as fun as you probably would have been. So I can only ask this, please, if you somehow can see this, in any way, even a little bit...remember. I did nothing for you, I never loved you, but remember me. Because if I knew you, I would always be there. I don't know you at all, but I love you as a brother. So remember me, as your half brother, just remember.-- Gears of War 2 (NGG) 02:01, 23 April 2009 (UTC)
Hi Jeff. My faith and beliefs allow me to believe that you'll be aware of this post, so I did want to stop by and leave a note. The beautiful note your mother wrote to David the other day compelled me to visit here and drop you a line. I'm sorry that we never got to meet; it is surely my loss to have missed that opportunity. In so many ways, it is your contributions to our community that have encouraged me to make some of the efforts I've made here. I believe that your legacy will echo through the halls of wikipedia for all time. I trust that you are at peace, and happy; and, I thank you for all that you gave to our community. —16:24, 24 April 2009 (UTC)
It makes me sad when I see the message "retired" for retired wikipedians, but it makes me feel a lot more sad a deceased wikipedian, unlike the first case, not bacause he/she won´t edit wikipedia again, but because the light of a valuable human being is gone. I did not know you, neither did any other deceased Wikipedian, but that´s all I need to know, the fact that you were once a Wikipedian and you helped to make the world better even if the contributions were not huge, that´s what makes you valuable. The little changes often gives out the most huge results. - Damërung ...ÏìíÏ..._ΞΞΞ_ . -- 05:49, 25 May 2009 (UTC)
My how I sure do miss you here on Wikipedia. I've thought about you and decided, after a subtle reminder on Dev920's page, that I should come leave some love since I haven't been here in a while. I'm sure you've been watching over our shoulders and just shaking your head at the "trouble" some of us have been getting into around here. lol Anyway.. good night Jeff. I'm thinking about you. - ALLST✰R▼echo wuz here @ 09:13, 19 June 2009 (UTC)
One year today. You are missed. -->David Shankbone 21:49, 6 August 2009 (UTC)
- Goodness me - so soon. Deep sigh, and as ever my best wishes to family. 20:51, 8 August 2009 (UTC)
- I cannot believe it has been a year. I was going through my talk archives the other day and came across a note from Jeff, and it made it all fresh again. Such a loss. I offer my best wishes for the family as well, and sincerest condolences. KillerChihuahua?!?Advice 21:31, 8 August 2009 (UTC)
I just met you
Is comhbhrón liom éagaoineadh Jeff.
My condolences to everyone on the loss of Jeff.
Ba maith liom mé féin a chur in aithne duit. I was around, lingering in the darkest recesses of Wikipedia until mid-2008. Our paths never crossed, until today, or so i thought. Jeff, your light still shines so bright i found you. Looking back over what you have written, both in articles and in sharing your life, i realise i owe you a lot. My belated condolences on the passing of Isaac.
Tá buíochas orm gur scríobh tú chugaim.
Thank you for contributing to Wikipedia.
My condolences from Indonesia and its Wikipedia
Another Wiki editor lost. I am tragically shocked and saddened by the number of Wikipedians dying over the past few years. I know you may have been gay, but any person, either those editing Wikipedia or those in any other activities, should never harrass any person in the world, no matter what. My condolences to those feeling devastated of this sad news,--Berlin Approach | Lufthansa 533 at FLT230 13:10, 26 October 2009 (UTC)
Oh, for crying out loud
This is silly. Sensible Jeff might well have said "move on". It's gone Christmas 2009, it's gone New Year 2009-10. I'd still like to see another contribution from Jeffpw. How on earth can you miss someone you've never met, never spoken to, apart from here and via email? But I do. Best of wishes to Jeff's family, and all who knew him (and "knew" him, in an online sense) for 2010. Tonywalton Talk 02:05, 6 January 2010 (UTC)
Nearly two years on
Just a reminder, Jeff, that you are still missed and remembered. You brought us good content, and good company. Peace. I am losing too many old friends these days. Rodhullandemu 04:04, 18 June 2010 (UTC)
My thoughts will be here from now on
I don't know how I came across this page last night, but what I do know is once I had read all of this and Jeff's memorial to his husband, I couldn't edit any longer.
I never really interacted much with Jeff, but from my early days at Wikipedia (from 2006), I saw him around a lot and was always struck by his passion and intensity, both in congenial collaboration and disagreements, I might add. I remember thinking, "This is a man who loves this project and all it stands for." Many editors prefer to come here behind a pseudonym (self included), but Jeff's honest and extremely open attitude was a breath of fresh air, to be highly respected, and proved how much trust he had in others.
I can see from this page that he meant a lot to people, and people meant a lot to him. I wasn't around when Jeff passed away, so to find out so late after came as a great shock to me, as I said. I was moved with great sadness, but at the same time uplifted that Isaac had someone to rely upon like Jeff and for him to then pass away so soon after must have been devastating for all involved, I can't imagine how it felt, but I did hug my children a little tighter on the way out today.
– B.hotep •talk• 10:37, 18 June 2010 (UTC)
Message from Eleanor, Jeff's mom, as the two year anniversary of his passing approaches
Hi all. Just as a brief introduction to this, I've been in contact with Jeff's mom Eleanor who has asked me to post a message on her behalf as the two year anniversary of Jeff's passing approaches on 6 August.
Hi. Jeff's mom here. Jeff's sister, Debbie, and I want to thank everyone for their remembrances and posts. I was super pleased to see there were 2 new ones this past June, as we approach the 2 year mark on August 6.
Jeff would be so pleased that people still remember him, as am I. Thank you again. :)
As I'm sure the community will agree, Jeff is still sorely missed. He was a friend to many. Eleanor - you and your family are in my thoughts. Regards, Ryan PostlethwaiteSee the mess I've created or let's have banter 23:24, 3 August 2010 (UTC)
- Thank you for posting her comments, Ryan. Eleanor and Debbie, my best wishes to you both as you continue to deal with life without Jeff. I can personally attest that he is still missed here. He has left a lasting mark on Wikipedia and in the hearts of many in the Wikipedia community. LadyofShalott 03:56, 4 August 2010 (UTC)
- Thanks from me too Ryan for posting that, and I can only echo the comments above to Eleanor and Debbie. Very best. 06:43, 4 August 2010 (UTC)
- My condolences to the family. Ucucha 20:55, 26 October 2010 (UTC)
- dagoneit .. why do I get so worked up about someone I never even met. Cheers and best Mom, Eleanor, and Debbie. I hope you all are well. All my heart. — 03:26, 23 June 2011 (UTC)
I've just been talking with another checkuser regarding ongoing vandalism and sockpuppetry aimed at Jeffpw via various means and just find it sad that even this long after a man's death some people find need to hate! Jeff is long past being hurt. and likely would not have been concerned by it even if he were still here & editing. fr33kman -simpleWP- 03:25, 19 November 2010 (UTC)
Just checkin' in, Jeff
No reason, no anniversary. I just wanted to post to say that Jeff's not forgotten. Still miss his wisdom and his humour. Best to his family, if they're keeping an eye on this page. Tonywalton Talk 00:36, 14 October 2011 (UTC)
- I just happened on some email exchanges I had with Jeff and came here to say the same thing as Tony. It's been a long time, but I remember Jeff well, and miss the class that he brought to the project - something that has been in short supply lately in some corners. Reading these tributes again, and remembering Jeff, I am reminded that we can do better. I just wish we had Jeffpw here to show us how. Warm wishes to his family and friends. Tvoz/talk 01:46, 21 September 2012 (UTC)
That reminds me
Today, my elementary school friend passed away. That reminds me to you........ The death of you, and my friend, makes a big loss........14:12, 26 October 2011 (UTC)
I miss you
— Moe ε 00:14, 1 November 2011 (UTC)
I still miss you too! I hope i never forget about you..... (Still misses Jeff on 17:37, 10 November 2011 (UTC))
I was editing the page of Spanish singer José Galisteo and just going through history of the page, discovered that it was established by User:Jeffpw on 19 August 2007. The page had been left for a long time with no updates, but now with a new release by Galisteo in 2013 called "Wish", I revamped the page adding some info. But clearly most of the work had been already done by Jeffpw (actually Jeff Woloson) when Galisteo enjoyed most popularity with his album Remember. How appropriate to have an album with such a title... So I come here to thank Jeff Woloson for the great work he did in Wikipedia. Whatever work we leave behind comes as a testimony of what we tried to offer to fellow men and that's what Jeff did in his Wikipedia articles. werldwayd (talk) 08:40, 27 July 2013 (UTC)
Something about you...
For some reason I've been looking through the Deceased Wikipedians pages and for some reason, I was particularly drawn to your obituary and account. Although I obviously haven't met you, I kind of feel like you remind me of myself. I think that I would be lucky to measure up to you as a person, a Wikipedian, a friend, a spouse, a son, a brother, and as the many other things that you were to people who cared about you. I'm so sorry that you had to go; you are clearly missed by many. I hope that you did find Isaӓc in heaven. Maybe I'll catch up with you guys there to one day. Who knows? Anyway, I'm sorry that it had to end like it did, but I hope that you are happy now, wherever you may be. I'll try to remember to murmur the Mourner's Kaddish for you the next time I go to synagogue. There's something about you that really reminds you of myself. I'd feel strange to post it on Wikipedia, but it really took me aback. My condolences to all family and friends of Jeff. From the information I've gathered, you were all lucky to know him. Rest in peace, Jeffrey. You were a good man.
- This was really nice to read. Thank you. --David Shankbone 05:01, 29 September 2013 (UTC)
Something Jeff might have appreciated
Been a long time
I still miss you Jeff. I was just reading through an old message archive of a nice Christmas card you sent me. A couple weeks ago I was looking through some history at a discussion of an old dispute of mine, only to see your name there, defending me in my cause. You'll always be missed. Regards, — Moe Epsilon 10:30, 13 January 2014 (UTC)
Not forgotten ...
Never met you, still remember you
Hey, Jeff. I'm not even active on Wikipedia anymore. I fell in love, and got married, and my spare time for the internet got seriously curtailed. Did you know that we have equal marriage in the US now? I'm sorry you didn't get to see it, because it's amazing. It has been a long time, but I haven't forgotten you. Good people who do good things always do stick in one's mind. They're still in too-short supply. -16:15, 19 May 2016 (UTC)
- It's been nearly eight years and I, too, still miss you Jeff. I remember how I felt at the time of your passing and I knew the world had lost a wonderful person that day. I remember your kindness and your patience; both will stick with me. Thank you for everything you did for me and for other people. Acalamari 21:56, 19 May 2016 (UTC)
You came to mind today
and I realized we're not far off the anniversary. Thinking of you, and Isaac. StarM 16:39, 24 July 2016 (UTC)
It's hard to believe that we're now at the eighth anniversary of the loss of Jeff. No, I haven't forgotten about him and yes, I do think of him from time to time. Wish I'd known Jeff for longer but I'm fortunate to have known him in the period when I did. Acalamari 12:33, 8 August 2016 (UTC)