Weird Years

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Weird Years
Starring Cal Dodd
Kathleen Laskey
Phil McCordic
Susan Roman
Tajja Isen
Country of origin Canada
No. of episodes approx. 26 [1]
Production
Running time approx. 23 mins (per episode)
Release
Original network YTV
Original release November 6, 2006

Weird Years is an animated comedy by Lenz Entertainment and Mercury Filmworks. It aired on YTV.

Synopsis[edit]

Weird Years is an animated series about Donko Dorkovitch and his eccentric family from Kryobia as they deal with life and transition in North America.

The show takes a lighthearted look at adventures in the New World as seen through the eyes of some very strange people. Donko’s ancient mother Zozo, for example, has not, will not, and never will be accustomed to life in North America and thinks it's a stupid place full of crazy heathens with crazy habits. The Dorkovich family lives in the Labrador town of Happy Valley.

Characters[edit]

The Dorkovich family[edit]

Donko and Magda Dorkovitch[edit]

A master plumber, who enjoys singing, dancing and trying to understand (and be a part of) the New World. He is very optimistic and naïve, living by old Kryobian sayings, and is rarely seen without a huge smile on his face. Donko had a truly sad childhood. He thought that his Father was, many years ago, killed by Yuri The Yak Herder, and, because of this, whenever he would see a Yak Herder, he would violently attack them, thinking the old men may be Yuri.

Magda is a butcher employed at Foodies who can't cook anything, however, she makes delicious sandwiches. She has an obsession with doing things the "right way". She tends to quote Jay Leno, often mistaking him with Buddha. No woman in her family was able to cook since her great grandmother, who created the world-renowned Kryobian sausage sauce for idiots.

Zozo Dorkovitch[edit]

Strange and mystical, Zozo is the Dorkovitches link to the Old World. She cooks better than Martha Stewart, and is stronger than the Marines. A truly strange old woman, she was likely an ex-assassin, and the most stubborn and outspoken person you would ever meet. She is completely positive that Kryobian Drago Merka discovered America. She was happily married to Igor Dorkovitch, and technically still is. After he was injected with a deadly poison she froze him in the icebox, and keeps him in the basement until a cure can be discovered.

Long ago, Zozo was considered a "hottie", with her own restaurant, the most successful one in Kryobia. Her best friend was, in life, a little old woman named Eta (who was just as beautiful as Zozo was), who caused her nothing but trouble, and recently came back as a (now-exorcised) ghost and tormented the entire family as a prank.

Rasputin the Goat[edit]

Rasputin is smarter than most would think, and more than a little warm for Donko's attention, described as "a very poofy goat." Most of his comedy is physical, like jumping on Donko and rapidly licking him.

Ivan and Nadia Dorkovitch[edit]

Ivan is a typical boy, enjoys modern technology, maybe a little too much, and can't seem to get with the ladies, except for his neighbor, Jenny Stevens, although, she was stuck with her parents in the Witness Protection Program for two months...

He enjoys visiting Bill Tweed, the neighbor who has a rare 1st issue of his favorite comic book, Coyote Man and a ham on rye sandwich, with one bite of it from Coyote Man's creator.

Nadia is very smart and talented, and is active in protecting the environment and her family. She loves the modern world, but is romanced by her grandmother's memories of Kryobia. Also, Nadia has appeared to have inherited her grandmother's cooking ability, which Zozo claims to skip a generation. Donko states that she is just like Zozo.

Ivan and Nadia are twins, born 12 minutes apart, in 1993.

Other characters[edit]

Beverly Tweed[edit]

Beverly is the seductive, oversexed woman next door. For weeks, she tried to seduce Donko. During this time she tried many things to get with Donko, right in front of Magda. At one time she jumped him, begging for some action, did Kama Sutra positions while thinking of him, ripped off his pants, and tied him up.

Additionally, she is hinted at having once been a drug addict, being shown to attend/counsel a drug rehabilitation clinic Magda was once forced to attend.

Bill Tweed[edit]

Bill is the lesser known husband of Beverly Tweed, the only episode so far he has starred in is "Best Before".

A recently unemployed married man, Bill was once obsessed with comic books, especially Coyote Man, and its creator, Don Wong, keeping a sandwich made by Magda, with one bite from Don Wong in a sterilized glass case in the center of the living room.

Although he may seem negligent at times, he truly loves her, once stating that "comic books can't hug you back." He remembers every detail of his first date with his wife, on August 5, 1982, claiming it was the best day of his life. By the looks of a picture of him in his younger years, Bill was an avid curler in Canada.

Annabelle and Belle[edit]

Annabelle and Belle are the two strange old women across the road of the Dorkoviches. They dress in an early 20th-century fashion with bonnets, dresses, and handbags, and live in a large old house. The pair enjoy spying on their neighbors and refer to Beverly as a tramp. In addition to that inappropriate habit, they haven't had the hair trap in their bathtub cleaned since 1929.

Danny Jeng[edit]

A wealthy neighbor of the Dorkovichs, Danny is seemingly of Asian descent and has a somewhat obnoxious attitude and laugh.

Kryobia[edit]

Kryobia is the country of which the Dorkovichs come from, the tourism slogan being "Kryobia: Our People Are Always Revolting." Its flag is oddly similar to that of Romania, with purple, yellow and red instead of blue/yellow/red.

Government[edit]

The Kryobian government is not specific, however it appears to be a democracy, and Donko's Uncle Rouple apparently ran for the Kryobian government, as a neo-conservative, it is unknown if he won or not.

The infamous Yuri The Yak Herder, Kryobian dictator, apparently sent Kryobia back into the Dark Ages by replacing all Blue Hats in Kryobia and replacing them with red ones. Donko's father, Igor Dorkovich overthrew Yuri, causing a revolution, but not before he was trampled by a herd of yaks. Igor claimed that Red Hats do not go with the Kryobians "surly complexion" as shown in the episode "The Big Thaw".

Scenery[edit]

  • Mount Kryobia - A tall, sharp mountain, it erupted.
  • Unnamed Desert - A desert that the Donkey of Death allegedly takes the Kryobian elderly across.
  • Lake Of Crocodiles - The last stop on the route of the donkey of death, the watery grave of many men and women.

Kryobian Wildlife[edit]

Kryobia is a land of many animals, from horses to crocodiles, probably the most extensive range of animals in the world, real or fictional. The country appears to be in Eastern Europe as goats are common pets. Of all the animals in Kryobia the most feared are probably crocodiles and donkeys, which is ironic, because Zozo nicknamed Donko "Donkey". The fear of these two animals come from the old legend that when the elderly become too old, they are strapped onto a donkey, called the Donkey Of Death, and pushed off a cliff and eaten by crocodiles.

Antiques[edit]

In the episode "Lawn Order", it is revealed that Kryobian antiques are rare, as described by an antique expert, that Kryobian antiques will be "The new Louis XVI". A single Kryobian Wind Chime was sold for $35,000, although Donko bought 30 for $5.00 in the old country.

History[edit]

Kryobia has a long and colourful history, of revolutions and

  • Circa 330 B.C. Kryobia was attacked by Alexander The Great. Following the"way of the Kryobians" all the people fled. This, however is contradicted by Zozo in "Wingnut 500" saying that Dorkoviches stay and fight.
  • At an unknown time Kryobia was plagued by the Goat Flu and all Kryobians died but two. This man and woman are the parents of modern Kryobia.
  • Circa 1965: A man named Yuri the Yak Herder took power and sent Kryobia back to the Dark Ages by making The entire population turn in their blue hats and replaced them with red ones. Donkos' father portested this and was trampled by yaks.
  • Circa 1975: when Donko was just a child, chicken was the national dish of Kryobia in all its forms, wings, thighs, legs and breasts. Then Kryobia's first fast food restaurant, Kackleberries, with its own mascot, Kackle Bob. At the time, all lawyers in the country invested in Kackleberries. The sinister restaurant used, however, mutated chicken, enriched with growth hormones. All Kryobians of the generation became allergic to chicken and could no longer enjoy their national dish. As a result, all Kryobian Lawyers were deported to Connecticut.

Episodes[edit]

Season 1[edit]

1 - Requiem for a Screen- When Ivan gets seriously addicted to videogames, the family intervenes in a way only the Dorkoviches could.

2 - Wingnut 5000- Magda can’t get the rest of her family to do things properly. If they would just listen to her, all would be fine. When she’s given a test robot at work to follow her orders, she knows her family will be the perfect place to try it out. The other Dorkoviches…and the robot…have other plans.

3 - Zozo's Teeth- Zozo’s false teeth tell her the Donkey of Death is coming for her. Of course, no one else but Zozo hears the teeth speak, so Donko finds himself having to decide if she would be better off in a retirement home.

4 - Silence of the Goats- An outbreak of calpine fever has created a world-wide cull of goats, putting Rasputin at risk. The Dorkovich family rallies to defend the weirdest member of this weird family.

6 - Death of a Mailman- When Zozo accidentally causes the local mailman's death, she makes the ridiculous claim he is “secret police” and subsequent events seem to bear her out.

7 - Goat Stew- Magda takes a routine medical exam to increase her benefits at Foodies. She will be able to rid Ivan of the curse of the Dorkovich tooth. However, Magda’s results threaten not only her benefits, and Ivan’s dental solution, but the whole family’s future.

8 - The Last Donko- Ivan and Nadia are suspicious that their parents belong to the Mafia. When the truth comes out, Ivan is determined to become a son worthy to be the next Kryobian Don.

9 - Autopia- When the family car keeps falling apart, Magda wants to give it up and buy a new one. Donko can’t bring himself to part with so many good memories he has of life in their car. It looks like Donko and Magda are headed for a big collision.

10 - Lawn Order- Greed takes hold of most of the Dorkovich family and won’t let go. Zozo has to take matters into her own hands to make things right.

11 - Weekend Retreat- When Magda heads off to a corporate retreat, the separation does not sit well with Donko or Zozo who descend upon the place, which has never seen guests quite like the Dorkoviches.

12 - Zozo Stewart- A restaurant critic discovers Zozo’s magnificent cooking and before she knows it, she has a restaurant, a cooking show, and unwanted celebrity.

? - The Truth about Truth- Nadia flunks a test on purpose. She also tells Zozo that she doesn't believe Captain Drago Merka discovered America, despite a story dance. So Zozo digs a grave and climbs in. She won't leave until Nadia Believes.

? - Home for the Holidays- It’s the Dorkovich’s favourite holiday. Zozo has it all planned out, cooking away, with Nadia at her side. Everyone else just has to be back in time for the dinner. You’d think it would be easy, right? But you’d be wrong.

? - The Bears and The Bees- Zozo is trying to make Rasputin make "pump-pump" with a she-goat, but he won't. Meanwhile Ivan is invited to a girls house and thinks she wants sex with him. Donko tries to explain sex to him and only makes things worse.

? - Pipes - Much to Ivan’s horror, Donko has taken him under his wing to teach him how to have a great career as a plumber, just like his Dad.

? - Infoodelity - Donko secretly eats some of Granny Jang’s delicious food, knowing it is a betrayal of Zozo. He can’t help himself, and when Zozo finds out, it is not a pretty picture.

? - A Band Apart - Nadia starts a rock band. Donko can’t help “helping.”

? - Driving Me Insane - Ivan forgets to mail Magda’s driver’s license renewal, which means she has to retake her driver’s test. Worse, she exposes to the kids that she has an extreme phobia about tests.