Wikipedia:Peer review/Paterson, New Jersey/archive1

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Paterson NJ[edit]

Editors, admins, Please leave your comments and feedback for this article here. Thank you --Javierbaires1 03:01, 5 January 2007 (UTC)Javierbaires1

It's a decent start. Here's a few comments that I hope are of some use:
  • The introduction is a tad too short. It should serve as a summary of the entire article.
  • In my browser the Paterson neighborhoods template is colliding with the second image, messing up the layout.
  • "The City's Neighborhoods" section could do with a map showing the layout of the neighborhoods relative to each other.
  • "The Great Falls of the Passaic River in Paterson, which are the second-highest large-volume falls on the East Coast of the United States." Isn't "falls" singular in this usage? The "are" looks odd to me.
  • There is a severe paucity of citations in the article. (Particularly assertions such as "Paterson ... became the cradle of the industrial revolution in America.") For a heuristic, I'd recommend about one per paragraph.
  • Do you have any images for the History section? It could use one or two, or possibly the addition of sub-sections.
  • The geography section is very short. Per the FA'd Ann Arbor, Michigan article, it could use a paragraph or two on the climate. Also, by comparison, the Paterson page is missing a number of others sections, such as Economy and Culture. The Education section seems far too brief.
  • Would it make sense for the Diversity section to follow the Demographics section? In the Diversity section, how is diversity reflected in having multiple stores and restaurants? You could say the same about a shopping mall. ;-)
  • Sice => Since
  • If the page gets too long, you might consider moving "Famous Patersonians" to another page.
Thanks. — RJH (talk) 16:22, 2 February 2007 (UTC)