Wikipedia:Peer review/Sonic Colors/archive1

Sonic Colors

This peer review discussion has been closed.
I've listed this article for peer review because… Sonic Colors was a GAN, but it failed. However, I believe it has potential, and I'm now checking on the article and fixing any problems. Please take your time.

Thanks, Railer-man (talk) 20:33, 9 April 2011 (UTC)

Comments by Sjones23

• Link where appropriate, but do not overlink.
• Make sure that this article undergoes a thorough copyedit.

Other than the issues described above, this article looks good. Please take my comments into consideration. Thanks, Darth Sjones23 (talk - contributions) 00:34, 25 April 2011 (UTC)

Ruhrfisch comments: This is not a game I have ever played, so I am not sure if that makes me the best reviewer, but here are some suggestions for improvement. Thanks for your work on this article.

• Since this had a pretty thourough review when it was at WP:GAN, the first thing I would do is make sure that all of the points in that review have been addressed.
• A model article is useful for ideas and examples to follow - there are over 100 FAs in Category:FA-Class video game articles which should include some sueful models.
• The lead should be an accessible and inviting overview of the whole article. Nothing important should be in the lead only - since it is a summary, it should all be repeated in the body of the article itself. However the release dates are only in the lead and in the infobox. This might just be me, but I think I would say something like it was released worldwide over a one week period in November 2010 in the lead and then but the actual dates in the body of the article.
• My rule of thumb is to include every header in the lead in some way, but I do not see any mention of promotional items in the current lead - please see WP:LEAD
• Agree this could use a copyedit - not sure what "an inconsistent difficulty" really means in Criticism included unresponsive controls and poor level design that led to an inconsistent difficulty. as just one example.
• In Plot does the plot take place 2 years after the plot of the previous game, or is it just that this game was released in 2010 and the previous game was released in 2008?
• Speaking of Sonic Unleashed, a) watch WP:OVERLINKing (it is linked twice in two sections - rule of thumb is to link on first mention in the lead and perhaps in the body of the article) and b) is it italicized or not (assume it is, but in Plot it is not italicized)
• Some of the parts of Gameplay seem to need refs to me (may be a Video Game MOS thing)(I know plots are considered to derive from the work in question and so are usually unsourced).
• Per the MOS, use "double quotes" not 'single quotes' (unless it is for a quote inside a longer quote, then use single quotes there). This means to change several places like The DS version exclusive Wisps include the 'Red Burst', which allows Sonic to burst in midair ...
• In Gameplay development I owuld identify who Takashi Iizuka is, since this is the first time he is mentioned in the text of the article (is in the infobox)
• Avoid vague time terms like ...although the European region still has not received the album as of yet.[30] instead use something like ...as of April 2011 the album has not been released in Europe.
• Needs a ref Another action figure was released by Jazwares that includes a 5-inch Sonic with two Wisps.
• I do not undertand what the last part of this sentence means For IGN's "Best of E3 2010 awards", Sonic Colors was nominated for "Best Wii game", but lost to Epic Mickey, "Best DS game", and "Best Platformer".[49] Was it also nominated for Best DS Game and Best Platformer (assume so)? Did it win or lose in those categories?
• Toolbox in the upper right corner of this PR page finds one dab link that needs to be fixed.
• Please make sure that the existing text includes no copyright violations, plagiarism, or close paraphrasing. For more information on this please see Wikipedia:Wikipedia_Signpost/2009-04-13/Dispatches. (This is a general warning given in all peer reviews, in view of previous problems that have risen over copyvios.)

Hope this helps. If my comments are useful, please consider peer reviewing an article, especially one at Wikipedia:Peer review/backlog (which is how I found this article). I do not watch peer reviews, so if you have questions or comments, please contact me on my talk page. Yours, Ruhrfisch _><>°^° 04:10, 26 April 2011 (UTC)