Wikipedia:WikiProject Military history/Assessment/Henry III of England

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The following discussion is closed. Please do not modify it. Subsequent comments should be made on the appropriate discussion page. No further edits should be made to this discussion.

Article promoted Hawkeye7 (talk) 19:19, 1 November 2013 (UTC)

Henry III of England[edit]

Nominator(s): Hchc2009 (talk)


I am nominating this article for A-Class review because it has recently passed GA, and I'd like to take it to FA in due course. Henry III was not the most successful military commander in the 13th century - he lost most of his campaigns, and was almost killed by his own men in one battle - but he was a significant historical figure, and shaped the later medieval English state. Hchc2009 (talk) 15:19, 30 September 2013 (UTC)

Support Comments: G'day, impressive. I took a quick look and will try to get back to it for a more thorough look on the weekend. Here are a couple of minor things I saw :

  • US or British English: "instructions from the center" --> "centre"?
  • punctuation/typo: "England. and a sequence"
  • "those lessor barons" --> "those lesser barons"?
  • "once both the center of the" --> "centre"?
  • "Eleanor quarreled" --> "quarrelled"?
  • typo: "with the bodies of the his Angevin family "
  • "to his naivity" --? "naivety"?
  • "theater or television" -> "theatre"? Regards, AustralianRupert (talk) 11:49, 3 October 2013 (UTC)
  • Changes made - thanks Rupert. Hchc2009 (talk) 16:54, 6 October 2013 (UTC)
  • No worries, continuing my review below (focusing just on the images):
  • "File:Westminster.abbey.tombofhenry.london.arp.jpg": might need a freedom of panorama licence as well? Perhaps "FoP-UK";
  • "File:Henry III funeral head.jpg": as above;
  • "File:Montfort Evesham.jpg": should have a US licence as well: "PD-Art" with the "PD-old-100" param would probably be sufficient, I think;
  • "File:Louis9+Henri3+StDenis.jpg": as above;
  • "File:Louis9 Innocentius4 Cluny.jpg": as above;
  • "File:Paris.elefant.jpg": as above;
  • "File:Gal nations edward i - trimmed.jpg": the PD-Art template should specify a parameter, for instance "PD-old-100" or something else;
  • "File:Lodka2.jpg": as above ;
  • "File:Jindra3doBrt1230.jpg": as above;
  • "File:Jindra3.jpg": as above;
  • "File:EustaceTheMonk.jpg": as above. AustralianRupert (talk) 05:29, 7 October 2013 (UTC)
  • Images should all be done now. Hchc2009 (talk) 07:51, 11 October 2013 (UTC)

Comments

  • "a charter later termed the Magna Carta.": In your opinion, does "Magna Carta" usually mean just the 1215 document, or can it also mean one or all of the other Great Charters? If the term has become ambiguous, a note to that effect would help.
  • It gets used both ways; I've simplified the sentence a bit. Hchc2009 (talk) 17:04, 6 October 2013 (UTC)
  • "The final Treaty of Lambeth, also known as the Treaty of Kingston, was agreed on the 12 and 13 September between Henry, Isabella, Louis, Guala and William.": "agreeing a treaty" is still informal in Britain, and often isn't understood outside Britain ... also, readers might think this means they signed on those dates, when they actually signed on the 20th. I'd go with: Henry, Isabella, Louis, Guala and William came to agreement on the final Treaty of Lambeth, also known as the Treaty of Kingston, on the 12 and 13 September. - Dank (push to talk) 20:24, 5 October 2013 (UTC)
  • Search for and fix "agreed" throughout.
  • Think I've caught most of these now. Hchc2009 (talk) 17:04, 6 October 2013 (UTC)
  • " and a sequence of revolts broke out. In late 1228, a group of potential Norman and Angevin rebels called upon Henry to invade and reclaim his inheritance, and Peter de Dreux, the Duke of Brittany, openly revolted against Louis and gave his homage to Henry." Rupert mentions this above, and I've got another concern: is this revolt part of the "sequence of revolts", or did it come after? - Dank (push to talk) 23:49, 5 October 2013 (UTC)
  • There were earlier revolts across France, which led up to this one; I've tried to clarify further in the text. Thanks Dank! Hchc2009 (talk) 17:04, 6 October 2013 (UTC)
  • "he appeared almost over-eager to take part": What's the appearance of being "almost over-eager"? I can't pull up an image in my head for that.
  • Support on prose per standard disclaimer. These are my edits. - Dank (push to talk) 04:14, 7 October 2013 (UTC)
  • CommentsSupport
    • No dab links [1] (no action req'd).
    • External links check out [2] (no action req'd).
    • Most of the images lack Alt Text so you might consider adding it for consistency [3] (suggestion only - not an ACR req).
    • The Citation Check Tool reveals no issues with reference consolidation (no action req'd).
    • Images review has been completed above.
    • The Earwig Tool reveal no issues with copyright violation or close paraphrasing [4] (no action req'd).
    • No duplicate links per WP:REPEATLINK (no action req'd).
    • Probably showing my ignorance here but what is a justicar? Might be a good idea to wikilink it in the body of the text rather than a note to explain it to readers like me.
    • Is there a missing word here: "...sometimes action would be taken against to support a baron's case..." specifically against what?
    • missing word here: "...and, after Louis's defeat at Battle of Al Mansurah in 1250...", consider instead: "...and, after Louis's defeat at the Battle of Al Mansurah in 1250..."
    • missing word here: "... however, there was a renewed interest in 13th English history..." missing "century"
    • Minor points aside this is a high qlty article in my opinion. Anotherclown (talk) 21:07, 19 October 2013 (UTC)
      • Thanks AnotherClown - should be all done now, will add Alt text shortly. Hchc2009 (talk) 06:51, 1 November 2013 (UTC)
        • Adding my spt now, well done FWIW. Anotherclown (talk) 13:12, 1 November 2013 (UTC)

The discussion above is closed. Please do not modify it. Subsequent comments should be made on the appropriate discussion page. No further edits should be made to this discussion.