Talk:Holly Steam Combination Company/GA1

Page contents not supported in other languages.
From Wikipedia, the free encyclopedia

GA Review[edit]

GA toolbox
Reviewing

Article (edit | visual edit | history) · Article talk (edit | history) · Watch

Reviewer: MWright96 (talk · contribs) 20:37, 21 August 2020 (UTC)[reply]

Shall review this article. MWright96 (talk) 20:37, 21 August 2020 (UTC)[reply]

  1. It is reasonably well written.
    a (prose): b (MoS for lead, layout, word choice, fiction, and lists):
  2. It is factually accurate and verifiable.
    a (reference section): b (citations to reliable sources): c (OR):
  3. It is broad in its coverage.
    a (major aspects): b (focused):
  4. It follows the neutral point of view policy.
    Fair representation without bias:
  5. It is stable.
    No edit wars, etc.:
  6. It is illustrated by images and other media, where possible and appropriate.
    a (images are tagged and non-free content have fair use rationales): b (appropriate use with suitable captions):
  7. Overall:
    Pass/Fail:

Lead[edit]

  • "was an American company that was the first steam heating company" - try to avoid repetition of the same word in the same sentence
  • Mention who Birdsill Holly was for the uninitiated
  • Perhaps expand the lead to state what happened to the company in its final years

History[edit]

  • "Birdsill Holly began working on a district steam system" - same issue as the second point in the lead section
  • " The following year Holly then constructed" - I don't believe the word "then" is needed here
  • "This heating system had a greater energy efficiency than the method then in use of individual boilers to heat individual buildings. The new heating system concept attracted the attention of interested investors." - consider merging these two sentences together
  • "This heating system had a greater energy efficiency than the method then in use of individual boilers" - method of using
  • "The Holly heating systems first used wood insulated pipe.[9] The steam was distributed using high duty pumping engines.[10]" - perhaps merging these two sentences might help matters?
  • "He ultimately obtained over 150 patents by 1888 refining steam heat techniques and methods of distribution." - the text in bold might be better off placed at the start or end of this sentence
  • Wikilink Brush Swan Electric Light Company to the relevant article
  • "By 1894 the Holly steam systems had been installed in over" - more than
  • Maybe this source [1] has additional information that can be inserted into the article?

Demise[edit]

  • "The Holly Steam Combination Company was reorganized in 1882. It became then the American District Steam Company (ADSC)." - these two sentences could be better off merged as one
 Done --Doug Coldwell (talk) 14:39, 22 August 2020 (UTC)[reply]

Sources[edit]

  • "Heating and ventilating magazine Company" - the words in bold should begin with capital letters
 Done --Doug Coldwell (talk) 14:39, 22 August 2020 (UTC)[reply]

Will put the review on hold to allow the nominator to address/query the points raised above. MWright96 (talk) 11:03, 22 August 2020 (UTC)[reply]

@MWright96: - All issues have been addressed. Can you take another look. Thanks. --Doug Coldwell (talk) 14:39, 22 August 2020 (UTC)[reply]
@Doug Coldwell: Now promoting to GA class. I've made changes to the new source added into the article. MWright96 (talk) 16:40, 22 August 2020 (UTC)[reply]
Retrieved from "https://en.wikipedia.org/w/index.php?title=Talk:Holly_Steam_Combination_Company/GA1&oldid=974372635"