Talk:Keiji Nishioka/GA1

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GA Review[edit]

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Reviewer: Gerald Waldo Luis (talk · contribs) 17:37, 16 December 2020 (UTC)[reply]


As part of handling the Agriculture, food, and drink part of the GA nomination, I will be reviewing this article. Note that my time zone is UTC+7. GeraldWL 17:37, 16 December 2020 (UTC)[reply]

Lead[edit]

Not needed. I've linked it in the infobox. I've deliberately left out linking it in his name, in the style of all articles I've seen for British knights - see Winston Churchill and M. Visvesvaraya. Wilhelm Tell DCCXLVI converse | fings wot i hav dun 00:56, 17 December 2020 (UTC)[reply]
Wilhelm Tell DCCXLVI, appreciate the bolding. I was about to point out articles like David Attenborough. GeraldWL 08:21, 17 December 2020 (UTC)[reply]
@Gerald Waldo Luis: As I clean up the prose section by section, could you check the other aspects in GA Review? OR, COPYVIO, RS, image use, stability etc. Wilhelm Tell DCCXLVI converse | fings wot i hav dun 09:07, 17 December 2020 (UTC)[reply]
Wilhelm Tell DCCXLVI, images are appropriate, article has stable recent history, no ORs, all sources are great, and no copyright violations. I would note, though, that some statements have two citations supporting it-- I suggest relocating to the specific claim(s) it supports if that is appropriate. GeraldWL 11:53, 17 December 2020 (UTC)[reply]
Don't think that's needed. I went through those again, in every instance, they only support the line immediately preceding them. So no problem there. Wilhelm Tell DCCXLVI converse | fings wot i hav dun 15:47, 17 December 2020 (UTC)[reply]
Wilhelm Tell DCCXLVI, in "Awards and titles," the first sentence is supported by three citations. Did a check, and apparently citation 10 is already enough to support the whole sentence, per quote: In 1980, His Majesty the fourth Druk Gyalpo awarded the red-scarf and conferred the title of Dasho to him in recognition of his selfless and dedicated services to the people of Bhutan in the field of agriculture development. Suggest removing 8 and 9. GeraldWL 16:04, 17 December 2020 (UTC)[reply]

Done, Gerald. Wilhelm Tell DCCXLVI converse | fings wot i hav dun 16:18, 17 December 2020 (UTC)[reply]

Done. Wilhelm Tell DCCXLVI converse | fings wot i hav dun 00:56, 17 December 2020 (UTC)[reply]
It was already done. Just look, Kingdom of Bhutan is indeed linked. Wilhelm Tell DCCXLVI converse | fings wot i hav dun 00:56, 17 December 2020 (UTC)[reply]
Done. Wilhelm Tell DCCXLVI converse | fings wot i hav dun 00:56, 17 December 2020 (UTC)[reply]
Done. Wilhelm Tell DCCXLVI converse | fings wot i hav dun 00:56, 17 December 2020 (UTC)[reply]
  • Suggest combining para 1 and 2, no need to give line break. GeraldWL 17:43, 16 December 2020 (UTC)[reply]
Done. @Gerald Waldo Luis: please proceed. Regards, Wilhelm Tell DCCXLVI converse | fings wot i hav dun 00:56, 17 December 2020 (UTC)[reply]

Early life[edit]

Done. Added Japanese Korea instead, as the country was not partitioned into North/South at the time. Wilhelm Tell DCCXLVI converse | fings wot i hav dun 09:07, 17 December 2020 (UTC)[reply]
See below

Life in Bhutan[edit]

  • "one of Nishioka's professors at the University in Osaka"-- if this is not referring to University of Osaka, I suggest decapitalizing "University." GeraldWL 08:27, 17 December 2020 (UTC)[reply]
Changed to the unambiguous term Osaka Prefecture University. Wilhelm Tell DCCXLVI converse | fings wot i hav dun 09:07, 17 December 2020 (UTC)[reply]
Don't think that's needed. All of agriculture, Bhutan and Agriculture in Bhutan are already linked in the lead. Wilhelm Tell DCCXLVI converse | fings wot i hav dun 09:07, 17 December 2020 (UTC)[reply]

Zhemgang[edit]

  • New words "Panbang" and "Kheng." If there's an article on them, suggest linking. GeraldWL 12:00, 17 December 2020 (UTC)[reply]
Done. Panbang linked, Kheng (the region) doesn't have an article. Wilhelm Tell DCCXLVI converse | fings wot i hav dun 13:02, 17 December 2020 (UTC)[reply]
  • "converted from forest"-- maybe "converted from a forest"? GeraldWL 13:46, 17 December 2020 (UTC)[reply]
Not needed. It's generic forest that's being referenced, not a particular one. Wilhelm Tell DCCXLVI converse | fings wot i hav dun 15:21, 17 December 2020 (UTC)[reply]
Done. Tweaked that sentence a bit, saying both 'cultivated wetland' and 'paddy field' in a sentence is redundant. Wilhelm Tell DCCXLVI converse | fings wot i hav dun 15:21, 17 December 2020 (UTC)[reply]
Done. Wilhelm Tell DCCXLVI converse | fings wot i hav dun 15:21, 17 December 2020 (UTC)[reply]
  • "creating Sonamthang village"-- suggest "creating the Sonamthang village for more natural reading flow. Ignore if simply Sonamthang is preferred linguistically. GeraldWL 13:46, 17 December 2020 (UTC)[reply]
Tweaked the sentence. Wilhelm Tell DCCXLVI converse | fings wot i hav dun 15:21, 17 December 2020 (UTC)[reply]
  • If the list of villages have a link (or interwiki link if you can), perhaps link them. GeraldWL 13:46, 17 December 2020 (UTC)[reply]
No wikilinks found, sorry. Not even for Sonamthang. Wilhelm Tell DCCXLVI converse | fings wot i hav dun 15:21, 17 December 2020 (UTC)[reply]
Done. Wilhelm Tell DCCXLVI converse | fings wot i hav dun 15:21, 17 December 2020 (UTC)[reply]
  • Is it "foodgrains" or does it require a space? Cause there's food grain. GeraldWL 13:46, 17 December 2020 (UTC)[reply]
Both forms are fine. I've left it as it is, as in my experience, I've always seen it as a single word. Wilhelm Tell DCCXLVI converse | fings wot i hav dun 15:21, 17 December 2020 (UTC)[reply]
Done. Wilhelm Tell DCCXLVI converse | fings wot i hav dun 15:21, 17 December 2020 (UTC)[reply]

Awards and titles[edit]

Can't. The page that civilian award links to is ridiculous. Bhutan doesn't have its own page for its awards either. Linked 'civilian' instead. Wilhelm Tell DCCXLVI converse | fings wot i hav dun 15:21, 17 December 2020 (UTC)[reply]

Death[edit]

  • Forgive me if I don't know anything, but what do you mean by "He was survived"? I've seen this statement in other articles as well and am confused. GeraldWL 13:46, 17 December 2020 (UTC)[reply]
The term is he was survived by. https://en.wiktionary.org/wiki/be_survived_by explains it. Wilhelm Tell DCCXLVI converse | fings wot i hav dun 15:21, 17 December 2020 (UTC)[reply]
Wilhelm Tell DCCXLVI, thanks for linking the Wiktionary. All these times reading bios I'm like What? This f***bag is resurrected? GeraldWL 15:52, 17 December 2020 (UTC)[reply]
Lol, understandable. You see, the dead guy isn't the one doing the surviving, it's his relatives. Wilhelm Tell DCCXLVI converse | fings wot i hav dun 15:54, 17 December 2020 (UTC)[reply]
Done. Wilhelm Tell DCCXLVI converse | fings wot i hav dun 15:21, 17 December 2020 (UTC)[reply]

Legacy and commemoration[edit]

Done. Wilhelm Tell DCCXLVI converse | fings wot i hav dun 15:21, 17 December 2020 (UTC)[reply]
  • "it is known as the Nishioka zam"-- perhaps clarify what "Nishioka zam" meant-- suggest having a footnote with the translated meaning, or some other way. GeraldWL 13:46, 17 December 2020 (UTC)[reply]
Kinda done. I don't have any formal sources I can add in the article, but from context and from here, zam seems to mean 'bridge'. I've included the translation in the prose. Wilhelm Tell DCCXLVI converse | fings wot i hav dun 15:21, 17 December 2020 (UTC)[reply]
Done, I added it in a new 'See also' section. Wilhelm Tell DCCXLVI converse | fings wot i hav dun 15:21, 17 December 2020 (UTC)[reply]
Wilhelm Tell DCCXLVI, the see also section is kinda vague. The two can be linked right at the body, at "its agricultural sector" and "bilateral relations between Japan and Bhutan" (Life in Bhutan), respectively. Linking at the prose where possible is more space-efficient. GeraldWL 15:56, 17 December 2020 (UTC)[reply]
Done. Wilhelm Tell DCCXLVI converse | fings wot i hav dun 16:04, 17 December 2020 (UTC)[reply]

Infobox[edit]

  • Caption reads "Keiji Nishioka in July 1989." In style of other articles, suggest ommiting "Keiji," as the full name is identified at the infobox header. GeraldWL 13:46, 17 December 2020 (UTC)[reply]
Done. Gerald Waldo Luis anything else? Wilhelm Tell DCCXLVI converse | fings wot i hav dun 15:21, 17 December 2020 (UTC)[reply]
Wilhelm Tell DCCXLVI, in "Life in Bhutan", there's "The Prime Minister (Lyonchhen) of Bhutan." Is Lyonchhen the Bhutanese of Prime Minister? If so, suggest italicizing. If no, suggest contextualizing. GeraldWL 15:57, 17 December 2020 (UTC)[reply]
Done. Italicised. Lyonchhen is indeed the word for 'Prime Minister' in Dzongkha, the Bhutanese national language. Wilhelm Tell DCCXLVI converse | fings wot i hav dun 16:04, 17 December 2020 (UTC)[reply]

Overall[edit]

After all issues above have been addressed, I'll put this up for GA. GeraldWL 14:14, 17 December 2020 (UTC)[reply]

Wilhelm Tell DCCXLVI, and it has passed. Congrats! I love this article being nominated for GA, because its prose (especially the Death section) is short and dynamic, which shows new editors that as long as notability is qualified and you write it with genuinity, even short articles can be a good one, and can even stand out among larger ones. GeraldWL 16:23, 17 December 2020 (UTC)[reply]
Gerald, thank you! I'm glad that you seem to have had at least as much fun as I did editing about a relatively obscure Japanese botanist who worked in Bhutan and has been dead 28 years. Short-ish articles definitely need more recognition - they can, with the right kind of work, be like the London Beer Flood article, which is an FA. Cheers and best wishes, Wilhelm Tell DCCXLVI converse | fings wot i hav dun 16:31, 17 December 2020 (UTC)[reply]
Good Article review progress box
Criteria: 1a. prose () 1b. MoS () 2a. ref layout () 2b. cites WP:RS () 2c. no WP:OR () 2d. no WP:CV ()
3a. broadness () 3b. focus () 4. neutral () 5. stable () 6a. free or tagged images () 6b. pics relevant ()
Note: this represents where the article stands relative to the Good Article criteria. Criteria marked are unassessed
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