Talk:Yoichi Wada/GA1

GA Review[edit]

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Reviewer: ProtoDrake (talk · contribs) 16:58, 14 July 2020 (UTC)[reply]

I'll do my best to review this. I'll try to be back with a more thorough review by next week, but I can give one comment at once. There's too much use of quotes rather than paraphrasing in the article. --ProtoDrake (talk) 16:58, 14 July 2020 (UTC)[reply]

Comments.

Image of Wada for the infobox?
I think the lead needs expanding somehow, as at the moment it looks decidedly lacking.
Some of the article reads too much as "at this point he did this, at this point he did that" rather than having any kind of consistent flow. It makes absorbing information very off-putting.
Archiving the links would be helpful.
I think Personal Life should head the article rather than be down at the bottom.
This interview might be useful. It's less than a month old.

Career

The date of his birth and early likings seem more suitable to the "Persona Life" section.
"In 2000, he decided to join "a company with a 'theme'", and, thinking that one of the themes of the 21st century was "creating society", chose the video game company Square.[3]" - Is there any reason he linked Square with societal creation?
"He helped reform the company's management system.[4]" - How was it reformed, and what comparison is there to the old system?
Did he have any role in the Square/Enix merger, or was he a nebulous presence?
"Wada has stated that consolidation has been "part of [his] plan" since 2000, as he had foreseen "the first phase of a major reformation of the industry" and had concluded that "there was a limit to what [Square Enix] could do with the wholly independent business culture [the company] worked within".[7]" - The switch from past to present tense for an event that's cited in an article over ten years old is a little jarring.
Any commentary on why he stepped down from SQEX? Or did it just happen?
"On March 26, 2013, Yoichi Wada announced his resignation as CEO of Square Enix, and that he will be replaced by former company director Yosuke Matsuda. The change was expected to go into effect in June 2013.[8][9][10]" - Most of the rest of the article is in past of present-tense, while this transitions into speaking in future tense about what's now a past event.
"Wada became the chairman of the Computer Entertainment Supplier's Association (CESA) in May 2006. The aim of the association is to promote the computer entertainment industry through research activities and exhibitions, including the annual Tokyo Game Show. In March 2012, it was announced that he would step down from his position at CESA formally in May 2012. He was replaced by Namco Bandai's Vice President Shin Unozawa.[14][15]" - Tense problem again.
"Wada, the founder of Shinra Technologies served as its President." - Maybe rephrase this as "Wada acted as its founder and president" or similar.

Views on the industry

From things I've picked up, Wada seems to have had some role in SQEX's polymorphic content approach. This seems a significant contribution, but there's nothing about it here. (Potential GameSpy source)

"Nowadays, Wada proactively..." - This comes off as too personal, plus the 'Nowadays' uses a citation from ten years ago, so its relevance to Wada in 2020 is questionable.
"Wada has a Twitter account.[23][24]" - Any further relevance around this?

On hold so changes and edits can be made. --ProtoDrake (talk) 08:25, 19 July 2020 (UTC)[reply]

Thanks for the review, I’m slowly going through the feedback and making the requested changes. Judgesurreal777 (talk) 18:06, 23 July 2020 (UTC)[reply]

Just so you know, I think I can get to the remaining fixes and additions on Saturday. Judgesurreal777 (talk) 21:07, 30 July 2020 (UTC)[reply]

@ProtoDrake: let’s close this for now. I did some of the changes, but my schedule has completely filled with life stuff and I don’t have time for even these simple changes. Thank you for your patience! Judgesurreal777 (talk) 22:10, 10 August 2020 (UTC)[reply]

As per Judgesurreal777's request, I'm closing this GA in the only way I can. Several points above have already been addressed, but other points can't be at this time. --ProtoDrake (talk) 09:18, 11 August 2020 (UTC)[reply]