User talk:TheJudge310

Brock: Are we on?

.........

Well?

.........

Good.

The camera pans up to show Brock with bandages on his face from another beating at the hands of the Royalty last week.

Brock: It has not been a very good past couple of weeks for me. I lose my title, almost die on the operating table, lose another shot at a title, and then get pinned by the Royal fucking Knight of all people. But all that is going to change. And it's going to start this week.

You see I know all about the Dream Team. I know all about their past sucess in PCW and the current wave they are riding here in WPW, and they have done it all by proving to everyone that they are funny.

I mean let's call a spade a spade, they are both pretty decent athletes, hell they wouldn't be former world champions if they weren't. But when you think of the Dream Team, you think of things like Craig Sinders, visits to children's classrooms, nightly coke binges, and Presidential campaigns.

Basically, they are the class clowns of the wrestling worls and everyone loves them for it.

The camera dips down a bit as Brock slaps the cameraman in the head and lfits the cameras back up to his face.

Brock: And it's true, that not many teams hold victories over the Dream Team. Hell I once heard someone say you could probably count them on both hands and that's it. And over the course of those losses, there has been no one set strategy to upend Dream and Jokester. People have tried to be funnier than them. People have tried to be more violent. People have tried to be more technically sound. And people have tried to ignore their random nonsequitors completely.

Sometimes these techniques work, most often they don't.

So now you may be asking yourself, how do you beat the Dream Team? Well you have to have some good teamwork, so if Dan shows up this week that would be nice. You also have to be in peak physical condition, and considering the ass kickings I've been getting weekly from the Royal Suckerpunchers, yeah I guess that's not good. You also have to be able to look past any grudges you may currently have and have your mind focused on the Dream Team and nothing else....I guess I can try that.

You know actually now that I look at it, this is going to be an extremely uphill battle on Turmoil. I can't trust my tag partner any further than I can throw him, the Royalty is seemingly out to end my career because they know the threat I am, and I am hurting as hell coming off some of the top stars in WPW while Dream and Jokester just fought X-Pac and Beno.

Uphill battle indeed.

But then again, that's why girls don't play the game. Dream, Jokester, your series of easy victories ends here. I am going to come at you with everything I have. No gimmicks, no cute little campaign speeches, no references to any of the Presidential candidates. Just me. Brock Goodman.

And I'm going to beat the shit out of both of you and send your record to 2 and 2.

Okay snapperhead, we're done.

The camera goes to static immediately.

The scene opens to an empty WPW arena. The arena appears to be set up for Live on Sunday. We change view as the camera is now focusing soley on the ring. Dan Murph can be seen sitting on the top turnbuckle, but he’s not on Live this week, so not really too sure why Dan is there, maybe he’s been just training.

Dan: I think perhaps I began my quest in the wrong direction. What I aimed to do was for the good of this company and all the people employed by it. But the way I tried to execute it was wrong. I thought that by knowing what was right, and attempting to do it that this quest of mine would succeed. But I was wrong. To cut off a problem this big you must go right to the source of why it happened. So that’s what I’m going to do. Now don’t wet your pants Carlos Gonzales, I don’t mean you. And I sure as hell don’t mean anybody in Royalty. This virus known as Royalty is stuck in WPW today because of one man, and one man only. Thus I must start my quest to kill Royalty with one of the greatest tag teams in decades. The Dream Team. A team of two jokers formed back at the start of the PCW days. Two men who went unbeaten for something like a year. As great as these two were as a team, individually they are both former World Champions, and neither should be taken lightly.

Dan gets up off the turnbuckle and begins to climb down the ropes. He stands on the ring apron.

This will be no easy step on the path to ridding WPW of its impurities. But do not worry partner, you can bet all the money in the world I will be there with you this Tuesday night on TNT. I agreed with a lot of what you said in your promo. But there was one thing that I could not agree to at all. Unlike you Brock, I will be bearing a grudge. Not against Royalty, for now. Or even against you after our short little feud just a few months ago. No, this grudge goes back over a year now. The Dream. You’ve just come back here, and I wouldn’t be surprised if you don’t remember me. Seems that a lot of people around here have forgotten the impact I’ve made in the past. But I remember you. I remember you and I teaming together, alongside your partner Jokester and two more men from the now defunct PCW. I remember us fighting together to save PCW from an untimely death. I had just shot up the card. And When Worlds Colide, even though it had been billed to be all about PCW and WPW fighting for their own futures. That match was all about me. I slaughtered everyone on Team WPW. In fact I can honestly say that WPW was as good as dead. Until their team began to gang up on me. After taking something like four finishers in a row, I was left on my back in the centre of the ring. You had a chance to make sure I didn’t get pinned. You were standing right there looking at me being pinned!! And you did absolutely NOTHING to stop it!! Not a damn thing to stop it!!

Dan once again sits down, this time on the ring apron. The camera comes in close as Dan stares directly into it.

My future in PCW was set to be great. The celebrations, the parades, the parties after destroying WPW. I had pictured them all in my head. They were fantastic. The record books read that The One is the man who killed PCW. I don’t agree with that at all. The Dream is the man who killed PCW. I don’t know why, and honestly after a year of wondering, I don’t care anymore. I’ve been waiting all this time to get my hands on you for this and now it’s my chance. Dream, I’m not going to stand here and insult everything you once stood for, or talk about what you’ve become. I’m not going to threaten breaking your neck or kicking your ass. Everything I will do to you, you will not watch me say on a tape, or read me writing it on a website. You will experience all of it on Tuesday night in the centre of that ring. So welcome back Dream. Welcome to the world ruled by Royalty, with a stroppy bastard owner who hates everyone. Because everything you see around you, is like this because of YOU!

Dan gets down off the ring apron, and begins to walk towards the curtain as the scene slowly begins to fade to black.

Jokester: What? This studio here? It smells of wee and boiled carrots. Non sequitors? The drummer out of Journey, a small rodent like a gerbil with green eyes and fourteen of your very best boob tubes, madam.

Why am I here?

(Off camera director) : To cut a promo for the Dream Team v The Goodman/Murph Conglomerate match next Tuesday.

Jokester: OK. Stream of consciousness type thing? I haven't got a script.

Director: Would you use one if we gave you it?

Jokester: Is Alien v Preditor Requiem gonna win best picture Oscar this year?

Director: OK, just do your thang.

Jokester: My thang? Hey, I'm being directed by Bootsy Collins. OK, lets start with a few words of thanks to everyone who voted for me in the Michigan primary. That's you, Mrs Betty Alicia Scroggins of 2176 Pontiac Boulevard, Detroit. Your check, as they say, is lost in the post. Meanwhile, the campaign elsewhere in the US goes really well. A recent Supreme Court decision has allocated every vote for a candidate named John to me which, if my arithmetic is correct, means that I get 30% from Iowa, 29% from New Hampshire, 20% from Michigan and 43% from New Brunswick which gives me a total of 122% of the vote so far. Now, that sounds like a winner to me.

Director:.......um.......isn't New Brunswick in Canada?

Jokester: Yeah, that's what's been so successful about my voter appeal - it crosses boundaries of age, sex, national territory and public decency with ease.

Director: What about Clinton?

Jokester: John Clinton? Yeah. Got all her votes too.

Director: OK, what about Bill?

Jokester: No Bill. The BJ she gave me was free.

Director: That gag only works in the UK.

Jokester: Sorta like a region 2 DVD then? Hahahaha. Nah, my jokes are universal.................though I am in negotiations with Disney and other major studios.

Director: OK, what about your match next Tuesday? Tell us about that.

Jokester: OK. Who've we got? Did I just hear Daniel J Murphy say that he wouldn't be surprised if the Dream didn't remember him? Dan, Dan, Dan. The Dream barely remembers where his penis is, so don't feel privileged if he walks past you in the hallway with a blank look on his face. He probably thinks you're the Popcorn Monkey..........or remembers where he left his penis. It's at Connie's apartment, by the way if you're watching this, tag team bud. Who's his partner? Mike Adams? El Pollo Negro? Brock Goodman? Oh, I always get them mixed up. Two of them are twisted human beings, punching well above their weight, never got anything interesting to say for themselves, more interested in how the Jets have done this week than in wrestling.....and the other is Brock Goodman.

Director: No. El Pollo is the chicken, not Brock Goodman.

Jokester: Ah, that's what they'd like you to think, but after Brock killed my very best friend Bent Windowlicker, he's been the one strutting around in a directionless manner wondering where he left his head. Brock, it's at Connie's apartment......hopefully not too close to Dream's penis. Nah, Dream Team versus Goodman and Murph? Only one way that's gonna finish........assuming I can find my partner that is. The NDS haven't got him again, have they? Abducted by aliens? What......again? Did they lose their anal probe or something?

It's at Connie's apartment I would imagine.

Director: OK. I think that's enough.

Jokester: Oh, so soon? Don't go yet. Did you hear the one about the orang-utan, the tub of butter and Al Gore's left kidney? You did? Can you remind me of the punchline. Buggered if I can remember it.

End

The scene opens to Dan Murph sitting down on a seat directly in front of the camera. This isn’t some silly gimmicky promo like his opponents love to do so often. This is serious. This is about the future of this company and all who work for it. So watch and listen carefully. Because this could very well concern you.

Dan: I think I’ve made my feelings on the Dream pretty damn clear in the last few days. Dream, I blame you for everything that’s happened around here. Things could have been easy for all of us man. If you had just done what you were supposed to do. PCW would have survived at When Worlds Colide. Carlos would have been put out of business. JMC would have been in the doghouse with PCW. And Royalty would have never taken over. I think I know why you did it though Dream. It wasn’t because you had a change of heart and decided that WPW was a better place to be. Or because you’re a “bad guy”. It’s because you’re jealous of me. Now, now, I know that sounds a little harsh. But think about it for a minute. Who is the man that set that night a light?? Who is the man who would have been pushed to the heavens in PCW after we defeated WPW and laid it to rest? ME, that’s who. What Dream, couldn’t stand not being the centre of attention for once?? Didn’t like the thought of someone else being in the spotlight?? Well you need to get used to it. Because it doesn’t matter who remembers you for what you’ve done in the past. It doesn’t matter what records you’ve broken or what Championships you’ve held. You won’t be remembered for any of that. You won’t be remembered for killing PCW. Because after I’m done with you on Tuesday night you will be remembered for one thing, and one thing only. Being Dan Murph’s Bitch!

Dan leans forward slightly. The camera begins to move in slowly as we begin to be able to see deep into Dan’s eyes.

But as much as I hate to say it. You’re not totally to blame. It’s most definitely your fault that Royalty was ever born. But others since have had chance after chance to stop them. Look at your tag team partner for example. Probably the most loved character in WPW right now. He loves to amuse people, tell his clever little jokes and play tricks on unsuspecting opponents. But what has he done to stop Royalty?? Not a damn thing. That’s what he’s done! This guy who gets the biggest pop every single night, and yet instead of trying to save the company that employs his overrated ass. He goes out there every night for himself, and himself only. He probably couldn’t give two fucks if any of the rest of us had a job after TNT. He’d rather concentrate on his jokes, and his “Election Campaign”. Yeah, I thought that the government in America was a joke enough already, but that just takes the damn cake. Jokester, if you’re not with us, trying to stop Royalty, you’re against us. I don’t care if you’re trying to become president of the United States, or if you’re Jesus Christ himself. You go against me in this battle, you will lose. I promise you that. Jokester, I actually believe that you’re just as bad as Royalty. Sure, you’re not fighting the same cause as them. But I know deep down inside of you, you know what they’re doing is wrong. And you haven’t done anything to try and stop it. I’ve said it before, and I’ll say it again. To know what is right, and to not do it is the worst cowardice. Jokester, you’re a coward, plain and simple.

Dan stands up from his seat. He turns around, picks up the chair and folds it, and then places it against the solid brick wall behind him. Dan half turns back towards the camera.

My journey towards ridding WPW of Royalty is in its early stages. Sacrifices will be made. And on Tuesday Night Turmoil the first sacrifices will be The Dream Team.

Once again Dan turns and walks away. The scene slowly fades out.

The Dream, clearly rattled by accusations of being the ‘comedy commodity’ in WPW, is sat on an exercise bicycle in front of a green screen showing the annual ‘running of the bull’ in Pamplona, juggling coconuts and whistling his own theme tune, rather self-indulgently.

Yes, it’s all The Dream’s fault. It’s The Dream’s fault your eyes are too far apart and your teeth too close together. It’s The Dream’s fault you can’t go five minutes inside of a wrestling ring without getting a hard-on. It’s The Dream’s fault I can’t even remember who you are, let alone what profession you’re in. Don’t you pass The Dream his towel after each victory?

And so to Royalty - another of The Dream’s wacky British ideas. And that terrible spate of rapes at the New Orleans Arena after I started that huge flood – they’ll never pin that one on me, but you all know the truth don’t you? And now you’re trying to tell me we teamed together in a match, PCW –vs- WPW?! Ha! It’s laughable! It’s like, I dunno, The Monday Night Wars or something… completely ridiculous.

Well, five long minutes listening to your shit has reminded me of one thing – that talking crap and shouting the word ‘bitch’ a lot, is all you got. Well excuse The Dream if it’s my fault you’ll never make it very far in this business with such a piss-poor excuse for a catchphrase. And no decent moves.

As for The Dream being jealous of anybody – I won’t even dignify that pile of steaming horseshit with a response. The Dream is always the centre of attention – if he’s not, it’s because you’re looking in the wrong place.

The Dream Team is gonna make it 4-0 this Tuesday and in the process, we’re gonna make the two of yous look like the pathetic whinging perennial underachievers you are. Once we’ve hit you with our endless double-team moves and crowd-pleasing finishers, it’ll be back to your former jobs for the both of you - wanking miserably into bins in the warehouse of your local post office, while your manager secretly tapes it all on CCTV so he can show his colleagues what a pair of fucking dirty losers you are.

Whilst soon, The Dream Team will be running the country, no less! So whatever your names are, you can bet your sweet shitting asses that The Dream Team will C U Next Tuesday for a beat down you’ll never forget. And you both better wash your hands before trying to grapple with us too, you dirty little devils.

The Dream, wearing a huge grin, throws all four coconuts in the air and leans back, opening his mouth into which they all seemingly disappear down – except they cleverly fly past behind his head, landing on the floor behind. Apart for the last one which lands straight in his face with a thud as he slips off the bicycle, ripping down the green screen behind him, revealing a naked Connie & Tina scowling and taking it in turns to smell a shit which they’ve found.

Thought I recognised the two women with their cup. Anyway, Dream appears to have metaphorically tagged his partner the Jokester back in so here is his address to the South Carolina Democratic Voter Association and Ferret Fanciers Club (incorporating Modal Aeroplane Enthusiasts of America)

Room 327, The HyattScumBall Motel and LapDance Emporium, near Universal Drive, not that near to be honest, Orlando, Fla.

Jokester then answered questions for the confused voters.

First question: (From a Senatorial looking woman in a trouser suit and a fake moustache) Can the candidate confirm his involvement with a string of juvenile delinquents involved in alcohol, drugs, sex and illegal gambling?

Jokester: Can I confirm it? I can positively celebrate it! The Senator, or whatever Bill calls you in bed these days - I presume Monica is right out - is well aware of my activities on the WPW website where I like to gently introduce my legions of adoring underage female fans to the pleasures of the adult world in a barely legal way.

Senator: You show them your cock.

Jokester: Yes, El Pollo has been known to post a picture on my web-page, the scamp! And my octopus, King Harold the Third of Norway, has been known to thrill to the stroke of a tiny childlike hand.

Senator: Your octopus is just a euphemism, isn't it?

Jokester: Hahahahahaha (aside: what's a euphemism?) hahahaha. No. My octopus is a cephalopod. Now, I'm finding senator Clinton's obsession with my sex life a little tedious. What a shame that she had not paid as much attention to her husband's sex life when he was in office.

(High fives Connie at his side) Connie: Ooooh! Feel the burn!

Jokester: Now, if no-one else has any questions?????

Max Stockton: Yes. Jokester, how do you feel about your match this Tuesday against Brock Goodman and Dan Murph?

Jokester: Mitch! Been demoted from Color Commentator to roving reporter? Bad luck. Let me answer your question in the only way I know how.....

Who?

The meeting breaks up in disarray and Jokester takes his leave of the throng, making his way down the aisle to his waiting unicycle. It looks as if the woman with the fake moustache attempts to stroke the octopus, but we woudn't want to be sued for libel.........again.

”Please be ware, the following message contains a career threatening virus. This virus was designed to attack Royalty, but if you find you have been infected by the virus after watching this promo, don’t bother going to see a doctor, or praying to God because your career maybe already over.”

Dan: So all I’ve got is shouting the word “bitch” a lot, huh? No Dream that’s not all I’ve got. I’m not a one trick horse like you. I watched that little promo of yours, and it seems to me that all you can do is make jokes about everything. Is that all you’re good for?? You’re damn right it’s all you’re good for. I know you’re not intimidated by me, why would you be?? You’re The Dream. Everyone’s favourite wrestler. You’re a legend around here. A lot of people probably don’t even know who your opponents are this week, they just see “an appearance by The Dream” and figure its going to be just another win for The Dream Team. And it’s not because you’re a great wrestler or a good athlete. It’s because you’re nothing more than a gimmick. You go around, making your stupid jokes about this or about that. But that’s all you do. People think you’re fun, and they love to come and watch you compete. But you’re not a wrestler, not really. You’re a circus act.

We go from a blank screen to seeing Dan. He’s on a plane, but instead of sitting back relaxing, he looks rather tense. The cameraman seems to be sitting next to him as the camera is fairly close to the side of Dan’s face.

Maybe this will be just another win for The Dream Team. It seems that everyone is desperate for this one last run of The Dream Team to be as successful as it possibly can be. People sending you good luck wishes for your matches, praying that The Dream Team will go on forever. Well, I’ve had about enough of the “One Last Run” crap. It’s been done before, over and over again. Hogan, Flair, Foley, Undertaker, DX. They’ve all done it, and not one of them has retired yet. I’ll tell you one thing. If you beat Brock and I. It won’t be because you’re better wrestlers. Or because you outsmarted us. It’s because management is in your favour. Or because the referee loves the Dream Team so much that he subconsciously makes a quick three count. But this last run can’t go on forever. I’m not the only one who’s begun to see through you Dream. Because you’re a fraud. You act the hero, but you’re nothing of the sort. Don’t believe that everyone around here will soon through you sooner or later?? I bet Hogan didn’t either. And now look at him. An old, washed up, piece of shit who has to show up every six months to try and ruin a future stars career just so he can be put over again, and shoved down our throats like you’ve been for the past four years, and honest to god I’m sick of it, and I’m sick of you.

So on Tuesday night. It’s one thing against the other. Good Vs. Evil. Right Vs. Wrong. A man who is loved by everyone in the crowd, and everyone backstage. Against a man who is the complete opposite. The fans hate me, but I couldn’t care less. Backstage, I’ve heard the whispers. Oh he’s unreliable. We can’t push him because he might not show up. Well I’m here. I’m ready for whatever you want to throw at me. And you can keep second guessing me. You can keep pushing me down and stopping me from reaching my full potential. But sooner or later you have to realise that I’m back. And no matter how hard you try and stop me. No matter who you put in front of me. I will prevail. And I will do what I’ve set out to do. That begins with you Dream. I’ve been waiting over a year to get my hands on you. And whether you remember me or not, come Tuesday night you will never forget me again. So fans, boo me if you want. Because I can not help the hearts I will break, and the tears that will be shed because what I will do to The Dream team, I know is right.

Dan sits back and tries to relax as one of the air hostess’ comes over with a trolly over drinks. The scene fades to black.

Brock Goodman is in his familiar final prematch prep area on a rooftop on a cold winter's night.

Brock: You know, I hate to say it...but I feel a bit out of place here. I mean my partner has all this history with Dream and Jokester and I....well frankly I don't.

In fact not only do I not really have any direct interaction with the Dream Team as a unit, but I benefitted quite handily from Dream turning his back on PCW.

Now my partner on the other hand, seems to be a raging ball of hate towards you guys. I guess I'll have to go along with it, I mean Jokester did clock me a few good times in that big ladder match.

Eh, who am I kidding? I am loving Dan's aggression, for this week at least he seems to have grown a sack. Danny boy, rest assured I am going to bring it as hard and as fast as you are. I finally see that fire and intensity in your eyes that has been missing for a long time. Dream, Jokester, I know you morons think you are the hot shit because you went on a tear in PCW by beating up the likes of the Canuxxter's Empire and Beno and his J.O.B. Squad a million times in a row, but face facts. You guys are old news. Dan and I are the future while you guys are focused on making sure you poll each other in the electorate.

Thje election results are in Ster/Dream '08 and it doesn't look good. It looks like Goodman/Murph is going to overtake you Tuesday night. And you guys can go back back to debating with the Clintons while Dan and I prove that the Dream Team is nothing but a bunch of hasbeens that can crack a good joke every now and then.

But for now....sleep.