User talk:Yuehan wang/sandbox: Difference between revisions
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1. Detailed additional information in Ecology and Form section. |
1. Detailed additional information in Ecology and Form section. |
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2. Very comprehensive explanation about how Linpan is formed. |
2. Very comprehensive explanation about how Linpan is formed. |
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3. Nice structure and beautiful sentences. |
3. Nice structure and beautiful sentences. |
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4. The conclusion sentence in each part of "The Causes for the Formation of Linpan Culture" section. |
4. The conclusion sentence in each part of "The Causes for the Formation of Linpan Culture" section. |
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1. Dujiangyan, Sichuan Basin and Chengdu Plane should be linked. |
1. Dujiangyan, Sichuan Basin and Chengdu Plane should be linked. |
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2. The "Form" section mostly discusses the features of Linpan, not how it is formed. It could be "Building" |
2. The "Form" section mostly discusses the features of Linpan, not how it is formed. It could be "Building". |
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3. I think section "The Causes for the Formation of Linpan Culture" is about how "Linpan Settlement" is formed, rather than "Linpan Culture". The title could be "The Causes for the Formation of Linpan", or just "Form". |
3. I think section "The Causes for the Formation of Linpan Culture" is about how "Linpan Settlement" is formed, rather than "Linpan Culture". The title could be "The Causes for the Formation of Linpan", or just "Form". |
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4. "Shu people", "Xiandao", and "Gangchang" in last paragraph should be explained or changed. |
4. "Shu people", "Xiandao", and "Gangchang" in last paragraph should be explained or changed. |
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Revision as of 16:10, 29 November 2017
Potential Topics:
1. Linpan in Chengdu Plain https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Linpan_in_Chengdu_Plain
Source: https://eds.b.ebscohost.com/eds/results?vid=1&sid=f59581eb-b8c4-4fae-bcbe-0167aeec4799%40sessionmgr102&bquery=Linpan&bdata=JnR5cGU9MCZzaXRlPWVkcy1saXZlJnNjb3BlPXNpdGU%3d https://digital.lib.washington.edu/researchworks/handle/1773/25397 http://en.cnki.com.cn/Article_en/CJFDTOTAL-JZYW201112015.htm http://en.cnki.com.cn/Article_en/CJFDTOTAL-CDSF201105006.htm http://www.tandfonline.com/doi/abs/10.1080/01944363.2013.882223
2. Gated community in Chinahttps://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Gated_community
Source: https://books.google.com/books?hl=en&lr=&id=3z19AgAAQBAJ&oi=fnd&pg=PP1&dq=gated+communities+in+china&ots=Jz4LH3l09N&sig=AVxSUSF5kbTOEPvL-V5u0nFLJtM#v=onepage&q=gated%20communities%20in%20china&f=false https://link.springer.com/article/10.1007/s10708-015-9684-9 http://www.tandfonline.com/doi/abs/10.2747/0272-3638.28.2.129
Peer review for Linpan
Very nice changes overall!
What I really like about this page are:
- The language. You used complex structures for sentences. For each paragraph you added, transitions between lines are very good. Advanced and professional vocabulary, and they have been correctly used.
- Nice to add the social aspects of Linpan ecology and form.
- Nice to add the whole section of the causes for the formation of Linpan, which brought many explanations from the socio-economic perspective.
What I would suggest for further edits:
- Since the sentences become complex, be careful of the words "it" and "which" - what are they refer to?
- For two places you provided specific numbers (percentages, areas, and height). It could be better if you can find sources for them.
- Since some of the contents you added are specifically Chinese customs and cultures, make sure not to use a Chinese vocabulary to confuse those who do not know much about these cultures. For example, in the "Culture and Customs" section, try explaining "Gangchang" and "Xiandao".
Another thing:
- I saw that in the original page someone has already written about Linpan settlements and made them as an independent section. It seems a little bit repeated as you also added some aspects of settlements in the Feature section (ecology and form). I do not know how to address this problem, though...
RebeccaLYU (talk) 13:47, 29 November 2017 (UTC)
Peer Review
Things I like
1. Detailed additional information in Ecology and Form section.
2. Very comprehensive explanation about how Linpan is formed.
3. Nice structure and beautiful sentences.
4. The conclusion sentence in each part of "The Causes for the Formation of Linpan Culture" section.
Things could be improved
1. Dujiangyan, Sichuan Basin and Chengdu Plane should be linked.
2. The "Form" section mostly discusses the features of Linpan, not how it is formed. It could be "Building".
3. I think section "The Causes for the Formation of Linpan Culture" is about how "Linpan Settlement" is formed, rather than "Linpan Culture". The title could be "The Causes for the Formation of Linpan", or just "Form".
4. "Shu people", "Xiandao", and "Gangchang" in last paragraph should be explained or changed.