Talk:Beth El Congregation (Winchester, Virginia)/GA1
GA Review
[edit]The following discussion is closed. Please do not modify it. Subsequent comments should be made on the appropriate discussion page. No further edits should be made to this discussion.
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Reviewer: Pbritti (talk · contribs) 06:31, 4 March 2024 (UTC)
Hello: Hi, I'm Pbritti, and I'm going to be reviewing your article! A quick bit about me: I'm a fan of religious subject matter and have worked on a couple GANs for articles about church buildings both as nominator and reviewer. I'll be a bit busy this week but hope to have this review mostly kicked off by the end of today UTC! ~ Pbritti (talk) 06:31, 4 March 2024 (UTC)
- Thank you for reviewing. APK hi :-) (talk) 06:54, 4 March 2024 (UTC)
- Oh, APK, it's you! I should've guessed. I'll have a busy work schedule this week but I should be done with my initial review in the next couple hours. I'll be unavailable from 9AM to 10PM from tomorrow through Thursday (I initially was stuck with this schedule Monday—Friday, but mercifully escaped). ~ Pbritti (talk) 14:12, 4 March 2024 (UTC)
Assessment
[edit]Well-written
- the prose is clear, concise, and understandable to an appropriately broad audience; spelling and grammar are correct
- Comment: I have removed contractions, obvious errors, and phrases that were non-standard to the encyclopedia. Additionally, there are some passages that need rephrasing. They are listed below:
leaving their Orthodox beliefs in the past.
I think you could delete this. DoneSunday School program.
Consider linking Sunday school. Donean Ordained Orthodox rabbi.
Is Ordained typically capitalized? I haven't seen that before, but I'm only familiar Reform terminology. DoneOn November 2, 1951, the congregation had a meeting where it was decided a synagogue was needed.
Perhaps rephrase toAt a meeting on November 2, 1951, the congregation decided a synagogue was needed
. DoneThe initial estimate to built it was $35,000.
I'd encourage the phraseestimated cost of construction
and suggest including the USD inflation template. Donereceived over $12,000 from non-Jews in the area.
The inflation template would also work here. DoneNot only is he a rabbi, but Stucker-Rozovsky is a major in the National Guard.
I would removeNot only is he a rabbi
and rephrase toStucker-Rozovsky is a chaplain with the rank of major in the National Guard
. Doneformer Ambassador to Bulgaria, Hugh Kenneth Hill, who has taught the congregation and non-Jews how Bulgaria was able to save some of its Jewish people
This passage is repeated twice. I recommend removing theProminent members include
sentence on neutrality grounds and to excise this redundancy. Done
- Comment: I have removed contractions, obvious errors, and phrases that were non-standard to the encyclopedia. Additionally, there are some passages that need rephrasing. They are listed below:
- it complies with the Manual of Style guidelines for lead sections, layout, words to watch, fiction, and list incorporation Passed
Verifiable with no original research
- it contains a list of all references (sources of information), presented in accordance with the layout style guideline Passed
- reliable sources are cited inline. All content that could reasonably be challenged, except for plot summaries and that which summarizes cited content elsewhere in the article, must be cited no later than the end of the paragraph (or line if the content is not in prose) Passed
- it contains no original research
- Comment: The following passage struck me as OR:
Following the 2018 Pittsburgh synagogue shooting, security measures were installed at Beth El.
The source for the security measures does not mention the Pittsburgh attack. I would copy the phrasing used in the body to the lead and remove the image of the Pittsburgh memorial (though it is a very moving image). Done
- Comment: The following passage struck me as OR:
- it contains no copyright violations or plagiarism Passed
Broad in its coverage
- it addresses the main aspects of the topic
- Comment::
Congregants asked the Hebrew Union College (HUC) to send a Reformed rabbi since the only members that still observed dietary laws were a few older people.
Since the source is offline, I couldn't see, but is there a date provided for when the rabbis in this paragraph arrived?- I don't think there was a date, but I'd have to go back to the library archives and check. (I've lost my copy of that reference) APK hi :-) (talk) 04:36, 5 March 2024 (UTC)
- Comment::
Neutral: it represents viewpoints fairly and without editorial bias, giving due weight to each Passed
Stable: it does not change significantly from day to day because of an ongoing edit war or content dispute Passed
Illustrated, if possible, by media such as images, video, or audio
- media are tagged with their copyright statuses, and valid non-free use rationales are provided for non-free content Passed
- media are relevant to the topic, and have suitable captions Passed
I would like to commend you for your excellent images, APK, and the wonderful creation of a new article. I'm glad that you've gotten it this far and expect to promote once the minor issues mentioned above have been addressed. I will come back to this article once you've been able to work through the comments in my assessment. Just ping me once that's done. I'll let you know if I notice anything else! ~ Pbritti (talk) 17:00, 4 March 2024 (UTC)
- Thank you @Pbritti:! APK hi :-) (talk) 04:36, 5 March 2024 (UTC)
- I've performed a couple spot checks on accessible sources as part of a final review before approval. Both spot checks turned up minor imprecision issues. Because of this, I'm going to briefly hold on approval and go through the accessible sources one last time. I probably won't bother you with insisting that you make fixes if they're minor things like the stuff I already corrected. Expect approval within 24 hours. Best, ~ Pbritti (talk) 06:00, 5 March 2024 (UTC)