Talk:Five Nights at Freddy's: Sister Location/GA1
GA Review
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Nominator: Nub098765 (talk · contribs) 08:17, 17 June 2024 (UTC)
Reviewer: Kung Fu Man (talk · contribs) 11:38, 25 June 2024 (UTC)
Plot
- "Elizabeth, William’s daughter, is heard begging him to play with Circus Baby, despite her father's insistence that she must stay away." - This sentence is just kinda here, and before we're told who William is. Was this meant to go somewhere else?
- This is fair. I don't think it could be anywhere else, as it happens between the nights after the TV show. I can't seem to reword it to account for context. The sentence is not extremely crucial, so I'm not sure about this one.
- What is scooping? It's mentioned in quotes, but probably better to not use the quotes while explaining what it actually means.
- I've replaced "scooped" with the word "gutted" (it eviscerates the animatronics).
- "but Mike reanimates" - Probably better to explain his body reanimates and he's still conscious.
- Reworded: I found out he actually doesn't die. So I changed it to "leaves him near death".
- I feel the Endings section could use citations, even if it's stuff like Valnet. Just something to verify the events of the game given this is a bit more complex than some titles.
- I've added what I could find; hopefully it's sufficient enough. I tried to avoid outright unreliable sources.
- The screenshot may be best left oriented as the infobox is currently forcing it down the page.
- Done.
That's actually the most I have to say about the prose. Once you respond or address these I'll do a spot check but overall she's looking pretty good.--Kung Fu Man (talk) 11:38, 25 June 2024 (UTC)
- @Kung Fu Man: Thanks for starting this review. I've responded to all and am looking forward to your response. Nub098765 (talk) 23:19, 25 June 2024 (UTC)