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Shortpacked!

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Shortpacked!
Author(s)David Willis
Websitehttp://www.shortpacked.com/
Current status/scheduleMonday through Friday, occasionally Mon-Wed-Fri
Launch date2005-01-17 [1]
Genre(s)farce
Preceded byIt's Walky!

Shortpacked! is a webcomic by David Willis set in a toy store. It is part of the Blank Label Comics family.

Origin

After putting an end to his successful webcomic It's Walky!, Willis decided to turn Shortpacked!, his autobiographical comic, into a new title. The strip is based in the same universe as It's Walky! and Roomies!, and features two side characters from the previous comic, Robin and Mike. While Shortpacked! started off as primarily a gag strip, with little overarching plot, in recent months plot driven storylines have alternated with the gag strips. The comic also often includes strips that take place outside of the regular setting and continuity, in particular one-shots lampooning pop-culture and comic figures such as Batman or Transformers.

A Shortpacked! strip also appears weekly on Toy News International.

Characters

Having given up on his dream of being a stand-up comedian, Ethan has settled for working retail. Retail has not broken him yet. He still has a bright shimmer of hope for the future and his fellow man. He has had recurring depressive episodes caused in part by the frustrating behavior of his customers, his boss, and some of his co-workers, and in part by the suppression of his homosexuality. Ethan escapes from his problems by delving deeply into toy fandom, particularly Batman and Transformers toys. The question of Ethan's sexual orientation was at first an ongoing question and source of frustration for Robin, who has a strong attraction to him. After comparing a kiss from Robin to one from Mike, Ethan had an epiphany that he was indeed gay[2]. Despite this revelation, his boss Galasso has made it clear that he expects Ethan to provide a male heir through intercourse with Galasso's daughter Conquest. Subsequently, however, Ethan was pressured further by Galasso to mate with Conquest (in a public setting no less), and Ethan finally admitted to all that he was gay; this resulted in him being fired, though he was re-hired by the end of the storyline.
The cruel, unfeeling, sociopathic, megalomaniac boss of the toy store. He treats the toy store and its workers like his personal army, and believes he will soon take over the world. Despite his dictatorial ambitions, Galasso is none too bright, and has demonstrated that he can be easily tricked or misled, particularly by those who tell him what he wants to hear. Galasso bears a resemblance in word and manner to Ra's al Ghul, a foe of Batman, although he physically resembles Spider-man villain Norman Osborn (note the hair). Like Ra's Al Ghul, Galasso has grown fearful of his 'Empire' failing should anything happen to him, and chose Ethan to be a suitor for his daughter Conquest so that she could bear him a male heir. He was unaware that Ethan was gay and Conquest has been taking birth control pills. Recently Galasso pressured Ethan into mating with Connie, and finally Ethan admitted to being gay. Now Galasso looks for another man to bear him an heir.
Slightly sociophobic - possibly due to unspecified abuse from her father - but caring, Amber is the wallflower of the group. She is shy, insecure, and something of an Internet recluse, preferring the anonymity of the Internet to real human contact. She works at Shortpacked!'s customer service desk, where customers provide her with endless frustration and a target for her sharp wit. Amber has gained a roommate in Robin, who moved in against Amber's will. Amber has, for about ten years, had an online relationship with a boy in Iowa named Nate, who she has recently met in real life. Amber has also been forced to play mediator between Ethan and Robin, who have recently had some problems in their friendship.
Hyperactive with few boundaries, Robin was a former agent of SEMME, who grew tired of all the work and responsibility and quit for "a brainless retail job". After moving in with Amber (despite Amber's protests), she was responsible for pulling Shortpacked!'s 'Drama Tag', introducing substantial character conflict into the strip. She harbors a crush on Ethan, and has made a number of overbearing and inappropriate bids for his affection, both before and after learning that he is gay. Robin is also extremely proud of her breasts & has referred to them as "Team Robin". During a sugar rush induced by a bowl full of Cadbury Eggs, Robin was elected to the U.S. House of Representatives by a group of necrophiliac Star Wars fans. She retains this seat, but does not appear to spend much time fulfilling any of the duties of her office. More recently, Robin made another attempt at getting Ethan for a boyfriend, this time by trying to convince him that she is a lesbian, knowing that Ethan's need to always be right would get the better of him. Even going so far as to convincing a real lesbian to fall in love with her and subsequently moved in with, she succeeded in tricking Ethan into kissing her, in order to prove that she was indeed straight. When Ethan realized the trickery, he took to ignoring her, as has Amber, leaving Robin to realize the dangers her impulsive actions have resulted in.
Mike enjoys doing everything he can to infuriate those around him, no matter the reason. He lives to inflict pain and misery on other people. Though he is not above helping other people, he does so in the meanest, nastiest way possible and it is most likely his 'aid' will later lead to some sort of strife for them later on. Like Robin, he is a former agent of SEMME, apparently resurrected after being killed at the end of It's Walky! It appears that due to his past 'life' and work with Robin, he is willing to do everything he can to infuriate her, even going so far as to kiss Ethan for no reason other than to help him decide his sexuality and to see the infuriated look on Robin's face. He only becomes friendly when excessively drunk.
He loves ninjas with every part of his body. Rick carries a sword with him at all times, this sword is real as he used it to block bullets and kill someone, and is completely dedicated to the ninja ways - or, at least, what he believes those ways to be. Rick's sexual orientation is in question, as in one story he was shown to be sleeping with Faz, who wished to become gay so that he could take Ethan's job. There is no other evidence to suggest that he may indeed be bisexual, and the matter of his sexuality has not been broached since.
40th President of the United States of America. Galasso resurrected and hired him after Ethan noted that anything from the 80s is guaranteed to generate money. Sweet and a bit dim, he appears to enjoy his job, and occasionally offers random bits of advice to random people.
In his first appearances he was a seasonal employee who sought to replace Ethan, but was later promoted to a full-fledged employee. A sycophant, he will do anything to improve his status, but does not seem to exercise good judgement about the best way to move up the ladder. He has an attraction to Amber, which he expresses inappropriately. Much to Faz's annoyance, Ethan has over-shot him on the ladder of success, after being promoted to assistant manager. Faz is now looking for Ethan's weakness so that he may destroy him.
The alluring (and legal) daughter of an as of yet unknown mother and Galasso, named after his favorite pastime. Goes by "Conni". She looks and speaks like a blonde Talia Al Ghul. Despite her wiles and frank sexuality, she could well have other qualities rather than being a vagina on legs - but apparently doesn't.

Conni was 'betrothed' to Ethan after Galasso demanded that one of his employees help him gain an heir, and remains so despite Ethan's recent discovery that he is gay while Ethan retains his new Assistant Manager position. This could mean that Galasso is unaware of this epiphany, or that he simply does not care, so long as he receives a suitable heir. She has recently been hired at Shortpacked, and has been selling CPRs for sex, to Ethan's disappointment.
Amber's boyfriend of several years, who is more or less a male version of her, sharing her introversion, quiet nature, and large round glasses. At the moment, his apartment is shared with a girl he was fond of in high school, recently divorced and in need of a place to stay. This situation led Amber to finally visit him in person and kiss him.
Robin's faux-girlfriend during her scheme to make Ethan jealous through pretending to be a lesbian, seemingly in love with Robin. After having her heart broken via Ethan cluing her into Robin's plan, she was not seen again until late December, when Robin asked to move in with her after isolating herself from her co-workers. Robin refers to her as "my lesbian".
Ultra Car seemingly showed up only to pull a prank (reading the letter to Ben from Short Circuit 2). In truth, he was sent to help Robin scan for the "Drama Tag". He is now stock manager of the store, and regularly abuses his position by scalping unreleased toys on E-Bay.

Collected editions

  • Shortpacked! Brings Back the Eighties ISBN 978-0-9796743-0-3
  • Shortpacked! Pulls the Drama Tag ISBN 978-0-9796743-1-0