Mr. Tyzik
Mr. Tyzik is a character portrayed by Mark McKinney on the sketch comedy show Kids in the Hall. He is a lonely man who disapproves of seemingly everyone especially business men and trendy people. He calls them flatheads because in his mind their heads deserve to be crushed. He is more than willing to help by crushing their heads from a distance with his fingers, saying "I'm crushing your head!" and making a crushing noise. Because of this he is often referred to as the Headcrusher. In his own words: "Not everyone deserves to have their head crushed, just 99.99999% of them." When Mr. Tyzik is not actively crushing someone's head, he is talking to himself about why someone near him deserves to have their head crushed.
Headcrushing
Examples
Mr. Tyzik usually sets up a chair in front of a busy location such as a business square or a club. He sits in the chair and verbally disapproves of each individual he sees and crushes their head.
He sometimes goes to great lengths in order to crush someone's head. In one sketch he even sets up a trap to lure particularly dirty business men into a tree house by putting up signs saying Girls ->. When a business man enters the tree house, Mr. Tyzik is sitting in a chair waiting. He crushes their head and marks down another head crushed.
Another memorable sketch with the Headcrusher was when a gangster came up to him and broke the hand with which the Headcrusher uses to crush people's heads. This caused him to go into an extreme panic.
Variations
In one sketch, Mr. Tyzik met a lady (played by Kevin McDonald) who taught him the amusement of putting your thumb over the head of a person in your eye sight and pretending that the person is not there. The lady would say, "There is nobody home. This is very similar to Headcrusher's pastime.
In another sketch he confronted a man (also played by Kevin McDonald) who was pinching faces on his turf. They had a battle where Mr. Tyzik was trying to crush the man's head and the man was trying to pinch Mr. Tyzik's face. The camera switches quickly between the two views as both men run away from the fingers of the other.
On stage
Mark McKinney played the Headcrusher live when The Kids in the Hall did their Tour of Duty in 2000. During the skit he ran around with his fingers in front of a camcorder crushing the heads of certain members of the audience. The crushing was displayed on a big screen behind him and looked exactly like the original sketches.
Morality
Mr. Tyzik acts very strange and he is usually alone. However, he is actually a good and moral person who feels like he is stuck in a world of boring and immoral people. You get to see his other side in a few sketches. In one sketch he is happy to stop crushing heads and help a trendy girl who is sick from alcohol and has been abandoned by her boyfriend. In another, he stops to ask a little boy in a suit what he wants to be when he grows up. Mr. Tyzik knows that the boy's mom dressed him that morning but when he finds out the boy actually wants to be a business man he crushes the boy's head.