The List (South Park)

"The List" is episode 1114 (#167) of Comedy Central's South Park, and was the eleventh season finale. ^[1]^[2] It originally aired on November 14, 2007.

Plot

The boys discover that the girls in their class have made a list of them, ordered by cuteness. The boys, after two attempts, eventually succeed in stealing the list and post it on the wall of the Boys' Bathroom and discover the list ranks Clyde as the cutest, and Kyle as the ugliest, with Cartman just above him. Kyle's spirits plummet after this discovery, while Clyde's ego inflates dramatically and he starts flirting with many girls at school. He takes pity on Kyle and kindly reassures him that Abraham Lincoln, who was apparently ugly, accomplished so much. Kyle, in an act of depression, starts hanging out with the ugly kids in the school, and gets the idea from a boy named Jamal to burn the school down. He is visited by the Ghost of Abraham Lincoln, who shows him that ugliness is a gift and not a curse, as one who is ugly has nothing handed to them and must earn it themselves, while those who are attractive will be handed everything and thus will develop no redeeming character when their looks start to fade. Apparently ignoring this advice, Kyle decides to go ahead with his plans of arson.

Meanwhile, Stan watches Kyle's behavior with increasing unease. Eventually, he asks his ex-girlfriend Wendy why Kyle was voted ugliest. Wendy consults the other girls, and begins investigating. She discovers that the ballots don't add up and that Clyde is, in fact, in the bottom five of the list. Wendy tries to bring the evidence to the other girls, but the girls quickly reveal the plot that they are in on - Clyde's father owns a local shoe-store, and they wanted to make Clyde popular to justify dating him and getting free shoes. In order to do this, they hid the real list and forged a new one, the one the boys stole. Wendy steals the real list from them and she and Stan run off to find Kyle, who is about to set the school on fire.

Stan and Wendy explain the truth to Kyle, when Bebe shows up and holds them at gunpoint, while admitting that Kyle was a "casualty" of their plot. However, Wendy has called the police, who arrive almost at once. Bebe is shocked, which Wendy takes advantage of to wrestle the gun from her. However, a shot goes off; however, neither Wendy nor Bebe are hurt - the bullet flies all the way across town and kills Kenny as he eats pop tarts at home. Bebe is arrested and taken to prison. Despite the trouble gone through to get it, Kyle refuses to take a look at the real list, fearing an inflated ego that Abraham Lincoln's ghost warned him about. Instead, he uses some of his flammable liquid to burn it. Wendy admits to Stan that she has enjoyed hanging out with him and feels that he has changed a lot since their breakup. Wendy's attempt to kiss him is interrupted when he vomits in her face.