Adoption parenting
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Adoption parenting can have many more challenges than normal parenting. Not only do you have to worry about the normal problems such as guiding a child through adolesence or teaching them how to behave properly but sometimes you have to overcome previous bad habits formed or get over some cultural barriers depending on where you have adopted the child from. This added stress from adoption can be burdensome on those who are not prepared to tackle these obstacles and that is why there are great lenghts taken to make sure that the home the child is going to is able to provide all of the care needed. The application process can take a long time and that is how they are determining if you are a uitable parent and will be able to raise this child to become a successful and contributing member of society.
Adopting Children
- People choose to adopt children for many different reasons. They may be at a place in their life or career where they can not take the time off to carry the child. They also may have become infertile or have suffered some sort of sickness or injury that preevents them of being able to become pregnant and/ or carry the child. Some people jusy have not found the right person and are increasing with age and feel that a replacement route would be to adopt a child.
- The people who experience these reasons then begin contacting various adoption agencies. They fill out the forms and find out the terms and what will be expected of them. Then the applicants lifestyles, incomes, interests, and even neighborhoods are examined by the agency to determine if the child will be placed in a safe and stable environment. If everything checks out and the funds are paid they begin searching for a child who needs a home and a great deal of the time they are taking it out of an unsafe situation.
Reasons for Being An Apdopting Parent
- There are some advantages to being an adopting parent. You are saving a child who was in an unsafe or unstable situation and giving them a chance. Children adopted from third world countries may have never stood a chance if it was not for the kindness and generosity of adopting parents in other parts of the world. Helping them grow up and see life does not always have to be a struggle and you can really do some good.
- Bringing children into a successful, loving environment can show them there is a different way. They can learn new languages depending on how young they were adopted. You can also instill in them better goals and drives for educations, socially acceptible behaviors, and striving for a life where the family is a safe and nuturing place. They child may not have these ideals because of cultural views from where they are from or just by seeing what is most prevalent around them.
Overcoming New Obstacles
- Adopting and raising a child brings new challenges for the parents who are trying to raise them. As children grow up they learn their skills, mannerisms, and goals through their parents actions. Children are like a blank slate and as they are raised they model themselves from their surrounding environment and the people they look up to. This is a job a parent works hard on throughout the childs life.
- Adopting children and raising them can cause other obstacles for a parent raising them to work around. There may be a language barrier caused by where the child was born and if they were old enough and learned how to communicate only in their language then there might be an adjustment period when they first get to the United States. They may have a hard time understanding basic communication and when they are hungry or thirsty they may not now what to do. This can be a problem when trying to teach the child the proper ways to go about things because they can not get through to let the child know what is appropriate behavior. They need to take classes together and both learn some of each others language until they can finally understand each other fully and establish the rules and actually help set a good example for the child.
- Another problem that parents who adopt children may run into are the cultural differences. Wherever the child grew up they may have been used to playing outside all the time or wearing little or no clothes. The US is more strict about these things and children of younger ages are not allowed outside without an adult. It is inappropriate in our society to take a child out of the house without an outfit on and in other place the chile may just be naked or in a diaper. Depending on the quality of the country the child is used too they may not have adequate plumbing so the child may think that going to the bathroom outdoors is appropriate. These differenece can present an immediate barrier but with some teaching and teamwork you can teach proper behavior to not cause other families to not welcome the child into the neighborhood.
Making Them Feel Like Family
- Bringing an adopted child into a already formed family might also raise some issues. When bringing in a child when there are already children present who are set and used to their current roles can sometimes cause some unpleasnt feeling towards the newcomer because it causes the the children who were already there to feel threatened. They may feel as if they are being replaced by the adopted child so the adopting parents need to work hard to make everyone feel as if they are equal.
- It is hard to not give all of your attention to the new adopted child because they are coming into this strange situation with new people and sometimes they need more attention and love to feel as if they really do belong there. The barriers that were mentioned in the previous section also cause situations where more attention may have to be provided to the adopted child and these are issues that have to be worked around. So with all of the obstacles that are already present then you have to worry about making sure the entire family can function all together with each other and not feel left out.
- Ways around these problems are to schedule times where the entire family will do something together and spend time while supervised so they can get to know each other. If one parent does have to concentrate their time on working with the adopted child then the other should spend time with the other children and each time this needs to happen the parent take turns with each so this way they do not feel there are specific favorites for each parent. Each parent helping with the needs of all the children is the only way to work through the differences in a healthy way and establish the greatest bonds between themselves and the children as well as letting situations develop where the children can form bonds with each other too.
United States Statistics
- In 1944, an estimated 50,000 children were adopted in the United States.
- In 1970, an estimated 175,000 children were adopted in the United States.
- In 1986, an estimated 104,000 children were adopted in the United States.
- In 2000, an estimated 127,000 children were adopted in the United States.
- In 2001, an estimated 127,000 children were adopted in the United States.
References
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