Cecil G. Murgatroyd
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Cecil Godfrey Murgatroyd (22 May 1958 – 21 May 2001) was mainly known for being involved in New Zealand national politics along with Australian Federal and State politics, and for his role in the 1998 Australian Constitutional convention. From 1981 until his death in 2001 he was generally associated with running, and standing as a candidate for, two non-serious parties, the Imperial British Conservative Party (IBCP) and the McGillicuddy Serious Party (McGSP), which both operated in the two countries. Murgatroyd's platforms were typically absurdist and of a 'pataphysical nature.[1]
Murgatroyd was initially active in New Zealand politics in the early 1980s, as a candidate for the (then) Wizard of Christchurch's IBCP and as the founder of the Waikato Cavalry Regiment of Alf's Imperial Army in the city of Hamilton. In the 1981 election he stood in the Waipa electorate for the Wizard or IBC party, and came fourth with 125 votes.[2]
In 1982 he moved to Melbourne. It was there he set up the Australian headquarters of the McGillicuddy Serious Party in 1984. After his move to Australia, he stood in elections there too against, among others, Prime Minister Bob Hawke in two federal elections in the 1980s and 1990s. Bob Hawke likened him to the rear end of a donkey. He often returned to New Zealand to contest parliamentary elections also, using tactics he described as being designed for "making elections interesting".[3] In 1990 the McGillicuddy Serious Party invited him back to New Zealand to contest the seat of Christchurch North against New Zealand Prime Minister Mike Moore. In this campaign he described himself as the McGSP's "Prime Ministerial specialist" due to his experience in Australia. Murgatroyd's aim in life was to be the first ever election candidate to not collect even one single vote, a record he hoped to achieve upon his return to New Zealand.[4][5]
Murgatroyd was also involved in the Australian Constitutional Convention, being a candidate under the ticket "Queen Anne of Australia".[6][7]
In his campaign as a candidate in the 1998 Victorian state election Murgatroyd described himself as "a holy Prophet for the Senate". He proposed that new migrants would have to pass a batting bowling and fielding tests, to assessing their cricket skills, to improve Australia's future sporting prospects.[8] He was diagnosed with cancer of the duodenum in 1999, and died in 2001 in Melbourne.[9]
The Other Wankers
Murgatroyd was a musician and a comedian, composing his own lyrics to parodies of popular tunes and delighting audiences on university campuses where he performed for O-Week and other occasions.
In 1988 he teamed up with drummer Steve Danko and bass guitarist Bruce Armstrong to form The Other Wankers, a band devoted to promoting Sexual Self-Satisfaction, ostensibly as a way of combating AIDS.[10] This project included sale of T-shirts with TOW logos, badges bearing slogans such as "stay a virgin" and "get a grip", "pirate quality recordings" on cassette (sold in plain brown wrappers), and the Wank Art Colouring Book, a crudely produced A4-size booklet of clumsy pornographic line drawings by visual artist E. M. Christensen.[11] TOW was billed as "the only band with its own full-time artist" a blatant exaggeration in keeping with Murgatroyd's over-the-top image.
With songs describing the joy and advantages of masturbation combined with surreal and sometimes sexually explicit images projected on a screen behind the stage, it is hardly surprising TOW had difficulty finding venues. The name, and a subtext in many of the lyrics suggesting that most successful musicians were wankers (an Australian slang term for pretentious and conceited persons) ensured few other bands were interested in sharing the bill with them. The Other Wankers lasted barely two years before Murgatroyd was deserted by his band members, both excellent musicians with serious careers elsewhere, and became a musical, as well as a sexual soloist.
He continued his mission, forming the Anti-Sex Police, membership of one, accompanying himself on ukulele which he played like a guitar, turning out some astonishing heavy-metal riffs.
Murgatroyd's one great regret was that he never made a professional-quality recording of his music, and although there are photographs of him in his many different guises, very little video footage of his performances survives.[12]
References
- ^ Vos, Inger "Murgatroyd Right All Along". 26 May 2001, Waikato Times p2.
- ^ Norton, Clifford (1988). New Zealand Parliamentary Election Results 1946–1987: Occasional Publications No 1, Department of Political Science. Wellington: Victoria University of Wellington. p. 371. ISBN 0-475-11200-8.
- ^ Vos, Inger "Murgatroyd Right All Along". 26 May 2001, Waikato Times p2.
- ^ Kent, Simon "An Australian Ruler for Kiwiland?" 16 September 1990 Sun Herald p158
- ^ Clarke, Magnus "Flying high with Republic Dodo" 23 November 1997 Sunday Herald Sun p 46
- ^ Johnson, Lyall "Vote 1: Sweetness, Light" 9 November 1997, Sunday Age, p 9
- ^ Heaney, Claire "Conventional Wisdom Earns Wide Interest". 11 October 1997 Herald-Sun p 20
- ^ Aubin, Tracey "Some Googlies in Senate Poll". 30 September 1998, The Weekly Times p 32
- ^ Vos, Inger (26 May 2001). "Murgatroyd right all along". Waikato Times. p. 2.
- ^ Cox, Michael "Wank Plan to Pull in Fans". 29 October 1988. The Truth
- ^ Lovell, Darren. "Start Wanking . . . or we'll all be Rooted!". June 1989. The Picture pp.18, 19
- ^ The Life and Times of Cecil G. Murgatroyd, 2003. Spit the Dummy Press, Ormond, Victoria