36D

For 36D, see Brassiere measurements.

"36D"
Single by The Beautiful South
from the album 0898 Beautiful South
Released	September 1992
Genre	Alternative rock
Length	5:16
Label	Go! Discs
Songwriter(s)	Paul Heaton, Dave Rotheray
Producer(s)	Jon Kelly, The Beautiful South
The Beautiful South singles chronology
"Bell Bottomed Tear" (1992) "36D" (1992) "Good as Gold (Stupid as Mud)" (1994)

"36D" is a song written by Paul Heaton and Dave Rotheray and performed by The Beautiful South. The song was originally found on the album 0898 Beautiful South and later appeared on two greatest hits compilations - 1994's Carry on up the Charts and 2007's Soup. As a single it reached no. 46 in the UK Singles Chart, spending two weeks in the Top 75 in 1992. The album version ran for 5 minutes 15 seconds.

The song starts as a ballad "Close your legs, open your mind " and it appears singer Dave Hemingway is singing fondly to a woman, telling her she doesn't have to make an effort with her looks for him to appreciate her. However, as the more upbeat chorus, sung by Hemingway and Heaton, comes in it becomes clear that the woman is the object of Heaton's scorn. The main cause of their disgust is her use of her 36D breasts to have frequent meaningless sex and turns herself into a media sex object, and maybe even a prostitute. Heaton is clearly unimpressed by her ("36D, so what?") and "You cheapen and you nasty every woman in this land" along with "Your picture's hanging pretty on the squaddies' walls, you're Steven's, Andys, you're Ian's, you're Paul's" shows his feelings perfectly.

The overtly sexual content of the song may be a reason why it did not chart highly as a single, as opposed to many of their other tongue-in-cheek songs like "Song for Whoever" and "Don't Marry Her". The song was one of the catalysts for Briana Corrigan leaving as she thought it painted glamour models, especially Page 3 girls, in a bad light when the media who put them there should be blamed instead.