Talk:Holby City series 18/GA1
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Reviewer: Bilorv (talk · contribs) 00:28, 2 January 2019 (UTC)
I'll review this shortly. Sorry to see that it's been languishing in the queue for such a long time. A couple of quick thoughts:
- Are there any promotional posters, DVD covers etc. that can be used in the infobox (under fair use)?
- The "Critical response" section looks almost empty. Are there not more reviews for various episodes? How were the premiere or the finale received? What were critics' opinions of various narrative arcs and characters in this series?
— Bilorv(c)(talk) 00:28, 2 January 2019 (UTC)
- Thank you for taking on this review! I know it's a fairly big article so I appreciate it. No fair use content that can be used for these types of series articles. Yes, I might be able to locate some bits from critics etc. to place in the critical response section. Thanks again, Soaper1234 - talk 10:11, 2 January 2019 (UTC)
- I've added some more critical response, but there isn't loads out there. Soaper1234 - talk 11:12, 2 January 2019 (UTC)
- Okay, thanks. The expanded version looks good. Here are the first batch of comments on the article; I've just got the lead and some more episode summaries to look through, which I should be able to do in a few hours. — Bilorv(c)(talk) 19:32, 2 January 2019 (UTC)
- @Bilorv: Thank you so much for your fast response! I wasn't expecting it so soon. I've responded to your improvements, so just let me know
- Soaper1234 - talk 23:56, 2 January 2019 (UTC)
- And thanks for your fast replies! I've left a few more comments under "Second batch". Once these are addressed, I'll be happy to pass the article. — Bilorv(c)(talk) 00:24, 3 January 2019 (UTC)
- @Bilorv: I've responded to your comments, some with answers, some with a
Done. Soaper1234 - talk 11:11, 3 January 2019 (UTC)
- Thanks again for the quick responses. After one small edit, I'm satisfied that the article meets all six GA criteria, so that's a pass for GA! — Bilorv(c)(talk) 12:05, 3 January 2019 (UTC)
- @Bilorv: Such excellent news! Thank you so much for taking the time out to complete this review. An great start to the new year. All the best, Soaper1234 - talk 12:22, 3 January 2019 (UTC)
- Thanks again for the quick responses. After one small edit, I'm satisfied that the article meets all six GA criteria, so that's a pass for GA! — Bilorv(c)(talk) 12:05, 3 January 2019 (UTC)
- @Bilorv: I've responded to your comments, some with answers, some with a
- And thanks for your fast replies! I've left a few more comments under "Second batch". Once these are addressed, I'll be happy to pass the article. — Bilorv(c)(talk) 00:24, 3 January 2019 (UTC)
- @Bilorv: Thank you so much for your fast response! I wasn't expecting it so soon. I've responded to your improvements, so just let me know
- Okay, thanks. The expanded version looks good. Here are the first batch of comments on the article; I've just got the lead and some more episode summaries to look through, which I should be able to do in a few hours. — Bilorv(c)(talk) 19:32, 2 January 2019 (UTC)
- I've added some more critical response, but there isn't loads out there. Soaper1234 - talk 11:12, 2 January 2019 (UTC)
Episodes
[edit]- If I'm understanding the note right, the figures given excluded simulcast data for consistency, right? It might be worth adding to the last sentence: "so it has been excluded". But then some episodes (e.g. #6) have overnight ratings instead, presumably because the episode didn't make the top 30 on BBC One that week. It's worth mentioning in the note that viewing figures are for 7 days (right?) unless they are specified as "overnight".
Done The figure is actually a combined rating from BBC One and BBC One HD, so I have updated the note to reflect this. All the figures (unless specified) are 28 days. Soaper1234 - talk 23:17, 2 January 2019 (UTC)
- There are quite a few seas of blue that need to be reworked. I see them in #1, #2, #4, #5, #8, #11. For instance, we open in #1 with "Cardiothoracic surgical registrar Mo Effanga". The links are certainly not paired as I expected them. This is difficult to rephrase but perhaps this works: "Mo Effanga (Chizzy Akudolu) is a registrar of cardiothoracic surgery; she has decided ..." Sometimes there are simple solutions e.g. (#4) "CT2 doctor Arthur Digby" (don't include "doctor" in the first link). Certainly the instances of three links in a row need rephrasing, and if it can be done eloquently then the double links should be rewritten as well.
- Hopefully this
Done, but let me know what you think. Thanks for pointing out this to me as I never realised that SOB was a thing! Soaper1234 - talk 23:17, 2 January 2019 (UTC)
- Hopefully this
- All plot lengths are between 100 and 200 words, so I'm happy that they're of consistent length and don't exceed the MOS:TVPLOT upper limit.
Production
[edit]- Can we mention somewhere that the series had no break following the previous series—that is, the series 18 premiere aired a week after the series 17 finale, in the same timeslot?
- "'will they, won't they?'" could perhaps link the wiktionary entry wikt:will-they-won't-they.
- The sentences on Harper talking about the standalone episode needs reference to a date. For instance: "In October 2015, Harper confirmed that a standalone episode was currently being filmed, to air in January 2016."
- "especially around the time of Casualty's thirtieth anniversary" — When is this anniversary? Well, 6 September 2016 based on our article on the show, but this needs mentioning in the prose.
- "Too Old for This Shift" needs an airdate mention (and I'd maybe only mention the month that it was announced in—June).
Done - I've mentioned the airdate as the date of the announcement is already mentioned. Soaper1234 - talk 23:29, 2 January 2019 (UTC)
- The October 2015 date needs mentions again in the sentences: "In an interview with Daniel Kilkelly of Digital Spy" and "Harper teased a ..."
Cast
[edit]- There are some more seas of blue to rework e.g. "Guy Henry appears as chief executive officer and consultant general surgeon Henrik Hanssen".
- I've tried my best here to get it
Done. See what you think and let me know. Soaper1234 - talk 23:54, 2 January 2019 (UTC)
- I've tried my best here to get it
- "making to decision to 'kill-off' his character" — No need for the quotes (or dash) and kill off can be linked for explanation.
Reception
[edit]- "soap opera EastEnders" is another sea of blue.
Done - Soaper1234 - talk 23:46, 2 January 2019 (UTC)
- Generally when things are nominated for awards but do not win, we just say "nominated". Hence you don't need "although it did not win" and "with other nominees losing out on their respective awards". For the "Best Drama Storyline", we can rephrase to avoid repetition of titles: "The storylines "Arthur's death", "Fletch saves the day!", and "Zosia and Ollie's romance" were longlisted in the "Best Drama Storyline" category; the first two were then shortlisted and "Arthur's death" was announced as winner." Then do a similar thing for "Best Drama Storyline".
Done - Soaper1234 - talk 23:46, 2 January 2019 (UTC)
Other
[edit]- Some Digital Spy references have Hachette Filipacchi UK as publisher rather than Hearst Magazines UK. Is this a mistake?
Done - fixed this. Soaper1234 - talk 23:38, 2 January 2019 (UTC)
- I've made some (hopefully) uncontroversial copyedits and reference fixes in this edit, and archived references in this edit.
- Brilliant, thank you. Soaper1234 - talk 23:38, 2 January 2019 (UTC)
Second batch
[edit]- Per criterion 2(d), I've a couple of checks for copyright violation, and nothing turned up (as expected).
- More copyediting here. Undo any of it if you feel it worsens the article.
- #26 says "However, he realises that he cannot lie to Arthur and he should not act differently." Who should act differently to what exactly?
Done - changed to "However, Dom realises that he cannot lie to Arthur and he should not act differently around him because he has cancer." Soaper1234 - talk 11:09, 3 January 2019 (UTC)
- #30 says "Zosia is detached from Oliver while working so he calls her cold." I'm not sure exactly what "calls her cold" means here.
- It quite literally means that Oliver calls Zosia cold. Would you like this changed? Soaper1234 - talk 11:09, 3 January 2019 (UTC)
- I've changed it myself to "Zosia is detached from Oliver while working, so he tells her that she is "cold"." — Bilorv(c)(talk) 12:05, 3 January 2019 (UTC)
- It quite literally means that Oliver calls Zosia cold. Would you like this changed? Soaper1234 - talk 11:09, 3 January 2019 (UTC)
- #46 says "She is impressed when Jasmine suggests that Herzig device for Valerie". I don't know what this means.
Done - changed to "Jac is impressed when Jasmine suggests that they use Herzig device for Valerie" Soaper1234 - talk 11:09, 3 January 2019 (UTC)
- How long is each episode? I'd briefly mention this under "Production".
Done - Soaper1234 - talk 11:09, 3 January 2019 (UTC)
- Per MOS:TITLEABSENTBOLD, we don't bold the "eighteenth series" in the lead.
Done - Soaper1234 - talk 11:09, 3 January 2019 (UTC)
- The first sentence has a sea of blue (I'd recommend de-linking "television series", which is perhaps an overlink anyway).
Done - Soaper1234 - talk 11:09, 3 January 2019 (UTC)
- The lead's second paragraph should use past tense ("appeared" and "starred"). We use present tense for fiction but the cast/acting details are real events so they should use past tense. I've also noticed that the same changes need to be made in the first paragraph of "Overview" (under "Cast").
Done - Soaper1234 - talk 11:09, 3 January 2019 (UTC)
- "attacked by an aggressive partner, who is married to a woman" – Not sure the gender of the partner really matters. Try "attacked by an aggressive partner, who is married".
Done - Soaper1234 - talk 11:09, 3 January 2019 (UTC)