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User:JackJiangZZ/Xi River/Wsvcis Peer Review

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General info

[edit]
Whose work are you reviewing?

JackJiangZZ, Ltyeunh12, and AbigaleJ

Link to draft you're reviewing
User:JackJiangZZ/Xi River
Link to the current version of the article (if it exists)
Xi River

Evaluate the drafted changes

[edit]

Your edits provide spatial context which is very good as the original article focuses heavily on location. The tone of your writing is both professional and neutral providing only factual information and not giving any perspective a biased view. Further the article has balanced sections and focuses on important information rather than minor details. Thanks to your article, I learned that since the river already experiences variation because of its monsoon climate, climate change could hit the region hard due to enhanced variation in weather conditions.

The writing is generally good but the sentence order and structure caused some confusion in the Current Issue section when you were presenting information and it could be reworked to improve the flow. The organization of the article could also use some work as it seems like the Environmental Impacts section focuses more on the morphological contributors to the river rather than impacts and the Current Issues section could likely be combined with it and given subheadings within one category such as Environmental Factors. Additionally, it is difficult to understand how your introduction is going to fit in whit the current introduction ex. if it will replace it or be added onto it.

Some of the sources are a space away from the end of the sentence so it becomes unclear what information is being cited. Affitionally many of the sentences in the article provide uncommon information and claims and should be cited, such as: "Its shipping volume ranks second in China, second only to the Yangtze River" and "The Xi River basin has historically experienced droughts, which are worsening due to climate change and rapid urbanization along with many parts of the river". Further the sentence "Rivers are a significant storage and transport system for both organic and inorganic carbon" needs to be sourced if it remains in the article but this information isn't particularly relevant to be in this article and could likely be removed as the rest of the Environmental Impacts section explains the importance of the river well enough. It might be good to find additional sources looking at other features of the river but it is understandable that there probably aren't many for this niche topic. Also as you search for sources it might be useful to look at who will be affected by these changes and look at the varied effects on them.