Conventional sex
Vanilla sex (or conventional sex) is a description of what a culture regards as standard or conventional sexual behaviour. Different cultures, subcultures and individuals have different ideas about what constitutes this type of sex. Often, it is interpreted as sex which doesn't involve such elements as BDSM, kink, or fetish activities.
Description
Among heterosexual couples in the Western world, vanilla sex often refers to the missionary position. Among homosexual men, it sometimes implies that the activity is non-insertive (i.e. intercrural intercourse, frottage etc.)[citation needed]. It can also be used to describe insertive sex without any element of BDSM or any fetish. The British Medical Journal defines it as "Sex that does not extend beyond affection, mutual masturbation, and oral and anal sex." [1]
The term "vanilla" derives from the use of vanilla extract as the basic flavouring for ice cream, and, by extension, meaning "plain" or "conventional". Thus, the term "vanilla" is sometimes used as an insult, to describe someone who is overly conventional, or unwilling to take risks, in both sexual and non-sexual contexts.
“Vanilla sex” may also be intended by the user to indicate "Caucasian"[citation needed] in the stereotypical, but unfounded, belief that such cultures are less sexually adventurous and promiscuous than others. Generally speaking, there is a much broader variance of sexual behaviour within individual cultures, than between them.[citation needed]
In relationships where only one partner enjoys less conventional forms of sexual expression, the partner who doesn't enjoy such activities is often referred to as the vanilla partner. As such, it's easy for them to be branded unadventurous and dull in sexual matters.[2] Through exploration with their partner, it's possible for a more vanilla-minded person to discover new facets of their sexuality. For others, such exploration isn't a positive experience, and they may find the practices they are comfortable with are sufficient for their satisfaction.
