Talk:One: Kagayaku Kisetsu e/GA1
GA Reassessment[edit]
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Overall this is one of the better articles in the anime GA sweeps, but there are still some problems.
- It is reasonably well written.
- a (prose):
b (MoS):
- The plot section could be condensed. There are 5 relatively long paragraphs. Some of the information from setting & story could be combined.
Fixed
- The plot section could be condensed. There are 5 relatively long paragraphs. Some of the information from setting & story could be combined.
- a (prose):
- It is factually accurate and verifiable.
- a (references): b (citations to reliable sources): c (OR):
- Several controversial comments are unrefereced, including some statements in the lead which aren't supported later in the article.
- a (references):
- It is broad in its coverage.
- a (major aspects): b (focused):
- a (major aspects):
- It follows the neutral point of view policy.
- Fair representation without bias:
- Fair representation without bias:
- It is stable.
- No edit wars, etc.:
- No edit wars, etc.:
- It is illustrated by images, where possible and appropriate.
- a (images are tagged and non-free images have fair use rationales): b (appropriate use with suitable captions):
- Copyright info should be strenghtened. See Popotan or School Rumble for good examples. Fixed
- Copyright info should be strenghtened. See Popotan or School Rumble for good examples.
- a (images are tagged and non-free images have fair use rationales):
- Overall:
- Pass/Fail:
- The issues could easily be fixed within a week so I'm putting this on hold for now.
- Pass/Fail:
Did you mean to start a group reassessment, or an individual reassessment? It may be helpful if you were to challenge the comments you feel are controversial with inline tags so that people can see how to fix the article. --Malkinann (talk) 01:08, 8 September 2009 (UTC)
- For the GA Sweeps. I may have hit the wrong link as I was a distracted then.陣内Jinnai 04:54, 8 September 2009 (UTC)
- I tried to shorten the setting and plot as much as I could, but I don't think the plot section can be condensed anymore without leaving out pertinent details about the Eternal World or the main plot of the game. I tried to take out most of the unsourced statements, though you may want to tag anything you think still needs a source as Malkinann suggested. I also updated the FURs of the images.--十八 05:25, 8 September 2009 (UTC)
- Updated the image checkbox. I'll have to wait and review the article again tomorrow as it's getting late tonight.陣内Jinnai 06:46, 8 September 2009 (UTC)
- Okay I
citedtagged the one statement that might reasonably be challenged.陣内Jinnai 20:02, 8 September 2009 (UTC)- I don't know if I could cite that with this or not, but the very next game Tactics produced after the Key developers left was Suzu ga Utau Hi, which has YET11 on the staff. He's also on the staff of the next game after that.--十八 21:57, 8 September 2009 (UTC)
- That would confirm that he'd be on the next project, but it wouldn't be able to confirm the others left after One unless you can show some statement from Tactics or those employees personally it isn't enough. Having them on the credit list of Key's game, but not Tactic's game it would be sythesis since there freelance jobs as well as people who use aliases on certain games or work as shadow employees. Because of this it could violate BLP as well since it's an unsourced statement on living person that could be seen as contriverisal because of its implications.陣内Jinnai 22:02, 8 September 2009 (UTC)
- So then I'd have to remove both the statement that the main developers left to form Key and that YET11 stayed on with Tactics?--十八 22:11, 8 September 2009 (UTC)
- Before that, what does Key's website history say? They might mention something. Might check archive.org for earlier versions as well. You can try Tactics's website and archive as well, but I doubt they'd mention it.陣内Jinnai 22:15, 8 September 2009 (UTC)
- In all the time since I've known of Key's early history, I've never found any official statements, particularly because there's no reason for the members of Key to want to be tied with Tactics anymore, and it makes sense since they renounced any claim to those games once they left the company. This is also why reportedly (though however unconfirmed) that the development team didn't get any of the royalties from One that later came from the adaptations or further releases of the game, such as the full voice version, or the Vista-compatible version. Although, it is true that Itaru Hinoue did include some illustrations from One in her art book recently released, but that could just be because she owns the ultimate copyright on her own drawings and she can do what she wishes with them. As for the archives, Key's website only goes as far back as May 10, 2000 roughly 2 years after forming. Oh wow, and I just see on that version that the original released date of Air was supposed to be July 14, 2000, but apparently got pushed back to September, and ironically enough, today is the 9 year anniversary of that release. Anyway, there's nothing that I can find in terms of official statements, and Tactics'/Nexton's website also don't go as far back as 1998.--十八 22:32, 8 September 2009 (UTC)
- The best you could state is that no future games that were produced by YET11 had any of the team members credited for future games. I think the issue about them moving to Key is relevant but I'm not sure how you can put it except to say that the creators, except YET11, later formed the company Key. Both of those are not though "Development" issues but "legacy" or "impact" issues and should be moved out of development. It should also be noted (if it hasn't already about the photos Itaru Hinoue released as well in such a section.
The importance here is not note that none of projects under Tactics YET11 worked on the others are "credited" for, which is verifiable.陣内Jinnai 22:47, 8 September 2009 (UTC)- Okay, I'll try to get that done, but would you mind rephrasing your last sentence; it's rather confusing.--十八 22:58, 8 September 2009 (UTC)
- Basically you just have to word it so that it states that none of the Key staff was credited for anything YET11 produced after One in tactics. Other than that, its fine to mention them being credited for work in the new company Key with the production of Kanon. It says mostly the same thing as what it does now, but doesn't claim they didn't work uncredited for Tactics, which cannot be verified.陣内Jinnai 23:23, 8 September 2009 (UTC)
- Okay, I decided to move the stuff about the One characters appearing in other media, and the One2 sequel into the legacy section, along with the stuff about the staff.--十八 00:26, 9 September 2009 (UTC)
- Okay, this appears to be better. The description in the legacy section seems fine. The reference about Itaru Hinoue's art book needs referring, though referencing the primary work is fine. However, that item is not in-and-of itself contriverisal enough imo to hold off the GAR pass unlike the previous items, however it should be addressed in the future.陣内Jinnai 00:56, 9 September 2009 (UTC)
- Okay, I decided to move the stuff about the One characters appearing in other media, and the One2 sequel into the legacy section, along with the stuff about the staff.--十八 00:26, 9 September 2009 (UTC)
- Basically you just have to word it so that it states that none of the Key staff was credited for anything YET11 produced after One in tactics. Other than that, its fine to mention them being credited for work in the new company Key with the production of Kanon. It says mostly the same thing as what it does now, but doesn't claim they didn't work uncredited for Tactics, which cannot be verified.陣内Jinnai 23:23, 8 September 2009 (UTC)
- Okay, I'll try to get that done, but would you mind rephrasing your last sentence; it's rather confusing.--十八 22:58, 8 September 2009 (UTC)
- The best you could state is that no future games that were produced by YET11 had any of the team members credited for future games. I think the issue about them moving to Key is relevant but I'm not sure how you can put it except to say that the creators, except YET11, later formed the company Key. Both of those are not though "Development" issues but "legacy" or "impact" issues and should be moved out of development. It should also be noted (if it hasn't already about the photos Itaru Hinoue released as well in such a section.
- In all the time since I've known of Key's early history, I've never found any official statements, particularly because there's no reason for the members of Key to want to be tied with Tactics anymore, and it makes sense since they renounced any claim to those games once they left the company. This is also why reportedly (though however unconfirmed) that the development team didn't get any of the royalties from One that later came from the adaptations or further releases of the game, such as the full voice version, or the Vista-compatible version. Although, it is true that Itaru Hinoue did include some illustrations from One in her art book recently released, but that could just be because she owns the ultimate copyright on her own drawings and she can do what she wishes with them. As for the archives, Key's website only goes as far back as May 10, 2000 roughly 2 years after forming. Oh wow, and I just see on that version that the original released date of Air was supposed to be July 14, 2000, but apparently got pushed back to September, and ironically enough, today is the 9 year anniversary of that release. Anyway, there's nothing that I can find in terms of official statements, and Tactics'/Nexton's website also don't go as far back as 1998.--十八 22:32, 8 September 2009 (UTC)
- Before that, what does Key's website history say? They might mention something. Might check archive.org for earlier versions as well. You can try Tactics's website and archive as well, but I doubt they'd mention it.陣内Jinnai 22:15, 8 September 2009 (UTC)
- So then I'd have to remove both the statement that the main developers left to form Key and that YET11 stayed on with Tactics?--十八 22:11, 8 September 2009 (UTC)
- That would confirm that he'd be on the next project, but it wouldn't be able to confirm the others left after One unless you can show some statement from Tactics or those employees personally it isn't enough. Having them on the credit list of Key's game, but not Tactic's game it would be sythesis since there freelance jobs as well as people who use aliases on certain games or work as shadow employees. Because of this it could violate BLP as well since it's an unsourced statement on living person that could be seen as contriverisal because of its implications.陣内Jinnai 22:02, 8 September 2009 (UTC)
- I don't know if I could cite that with this or not, but the very next game Tactics produced after the Key developers left was Suzu ga Utau Hi, which has YET11 on the staff. He's also on the staff of the next game after that.--十八 21:57, 8 September 2009 (UTC)
- Okay I
- Updated the image checkbox. I'll have to wait and review the article again tomorrow as it's getting late tonight.陣内Jinnai 06:46, 8 September 2009 (UTC)
- I tried to shorten the setting and plot as much as I could, but I don't think the plot section can be condensed anymore without leaving out pertinent details about the Eternal World or the main plot of the game. I tried to take out most of the unsourced statements, though you may want to tag anything you think still needs a source as Malkinann suggested. I also updated the FURs of the images.--十八 05:25, 8 September 2009 (UTC)