Wikipedia:Featured article candidates/University of California, Riverside/archive1

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The following is an archived discussion of a featured article nomination. Please do not modify it. Subsequent comments should be made on the article's talk page or in Wikipedia talk:Featured article candidates. No further edits should be made to this page.

The article was not promoted 22:39, 7 January 2008.

University of California, Riverside[edit]

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I'm nominating this article for featured article because... I am aware there may be MOS issues, but it would be easier for me to proceed in improving this article further if they were pointed out. Otherwise, I feel this article meets all other criteria for FAC. Ameriquedialectics 18:34, 2 January 2008 (UTC)[reply]

  • Is it possible to talk about the history/making/importance of the fight song rather than just putting the lyrics there? bibliomaniac15 19:06, 2 January 2008 (UTC)[reply]
I'll just remove for the time being... there is a link to the fight song in the infobox. Ameriquedialectics 19:25, 2 January 2008 (UTC)[reply]
Or rather, there used to be. Someone reformatted the infobox template code awhile back and removed some of the values. Still, the fight song was rather crufty. Ameriquedialectics 19:33, 2 January 2008 (UTC)[reply]
  • Oppose. There are numerous WP:MOS violations that need to be fixed.
    • Need to have metric conversions for each standard unit (for example, I see acres, pounds, feet, etc without conversions).
 Done I believe I got them all. Ameriquedialectics 04:45, 3 January 2008 (UTC)[reply]
    • Need a non-breaking space between all units and their qualifiers (for example, 1200 acres should have a non-breaking space)
 Done I believe taking care of the metric conversion issue solved this problem, as they are all templated now. Ameriquedialectics 05:13, 3 January 2008 (UTC)[reply]
It also covers things like $435 million, 40 years, 52 minors, etc. Could you take a look at those, please? Karanacs (talk) 18:31, 3 January 2008 (UTC)[reply]
Think I got them all now. Ameriquedialectics 02:13, 4 January 2008 (UTC)[reply]
    • The history section is too short to need subheadings. Either expand the sections or remove the subheadings
 Done Removed subheadings Ameriquedialectics 05:16, 3 January 2008 (UTC)[reply]
    • In unit conversions, if you write out the first number, write out the second one also
 Done I believe I caught the only instance of that in the campus section. If there are others please let me know. I really appreciate your critique. Ameriquedialectics 05:25, 3 January 2008 (UTC)[reply]
 Done Forked individual academic units to University of California, Riverside academics, summarized some info in first paragraph. Ameriquedialectics 05:57, 3 January 2008 (UTC)[reply]
 Done I believe I forked the only instance of that to University of California, Riverside academics (corrected in the content fork). Ameriquedialectics 07:32, 3 January 2008 (UTC)[reply]
There's one more instance in the Administration and Finance section. Karanacs (talk) 18:31, 3 January 2008 (UTC)[reply]
Got it. Ameriquedialectics 02:13, 4 January 2008 (UTC)[reply]
    • Please make sure that citations are ordered: for example, this sentence More specialized collections not administered by the library but by individual academic colleges include an herbarium, one of the world's most important citrus variety collections, and one of the largest entomological museums in the United States. has citations [63][10]11 -> [63] shoul be last.
 Done Changed a ref and removed some duplicates from the lead section. Ameriquedialectics 08:02, 3 January 2008 (UTC)[reply]
    • The rankings and libraries sections have a lot of very short paragraphs. Please try to combine these if possible
 Done Edited into paragraphs. Calling it a night for now. Ameriquedialectics 09:38, 3 January 2008 (UTC)[reply]
    • In the housing section, you need citations for the number of students housed and the plans for new family housing, as well as that 76% of all first-year students lived on campus
 Done Edited and provided available information as I could find it. (The actual student housing site contains provides almost no useful information on this.) Page 40 of the LRP provides the housing #s I put into the text. Ameriquedialectics 10:52, 4 January 2008 (UTC)[reply]
    • Campus security section paragraphs are too short to stand alone - please combine if possible
 Done Removed Campus Security section per WP:Notability, moved emergency notification systems to the lead paragraph. Ameriquedialectics 19:24, 4 January 2008 (UTC)[reply]
    • "economical" should be "economic"
 Done Got it. Ameriquedialectics 23:23, 4 January 2008 (UTC)[reply]
    • You should be able to easily find citations for the fact that the Women's Basketball team has made it to round 1 of the playoff, that the soccer team won, and that the baseball team won a conference championship. Also need a cite for the cross country team's "best season ever"
 Done Got these and overhauled the whole section. Ameriquedialectics 06:08, 5 January 2008 (UTC)[reply]
    • Full dates within references should be wikilinked (i.e., ref 2)
 Done Ameriquedialectics 21:30, 5 January 2008 (UTC)[reply]
    • Newspapers and magazine names should be italicized in the refs. You can use the citation template with newspaper= instead of publisher=
 Done In most cases, this was accomplished by both changing "publisher=" to "newspaper=", and, most heroically, by changing {{cite web}} and {{cite news}} to {{citation}}, which should make fans of consistency and fans of the {{tl|citation} template very happy. szyslak 02:20, 6 January 2008 (UTC)[reply]
...But now, the last two citations show up in the reflist as links to Template:Citation/core, and I can't figure out what's going on? Either it's a server problem or something that can be fixed by someone with more experience with that template than me. szyslak 02:25, 6 January 2008 (UTC)[reply]
I reverted back to the last stable version. No need to change every "cite web," as in some cases these are only websites not other media. Thanks for helping anyway Ameriquedialectics 03:20, 6 January 2008 (UTC)[reply]
I think this is taken care of now. Ameriquedialectics 05:50, 6 January 2008 (UTC)[reply]
don't forget about US News and World ReportKaranacs (talk) 17:00, 7 January 2008 (UTC)[reply]
Got them and all other media that publish rankings lists. Best, Ameriquedialectics 18:50, 7 January 2008 (UTC)[reply]
    • All websites need a publisher listed separately (see 34 and 35 and 36)

Karanacs (talk) 03:42, 3 January 2008 (UTC)[reply]

 Done If I didn't catch them all, just let me know, but my Internet access might be sporadic for the next couple days (and will definitely be back on on Monday). Once I have access again, I plan to tackle Tony1's copyediting concerns as well. szyslak 02:20, 6 January 2008 (UTC)[reply]
I think Karanacs' initial concerns have been addressed now, please feel free to point out anything else. Ameriquedialectics 05:50, 6 January 2008 (UTC)[reply]

A few minor things here and there... as per WP:UNI's article guidelines, the Athletics section should be embedded inside the Student Life section. And Scotty the Bear in Infobox University might need a <br /> ("bear" is getting cut off to the next time at the moment) I'll take a closer look at it tomorrow. - Jameson L. Tai talk ♦ contribs 05:49, 3 January 2008 (UTC)[reply]

Thanks... <br /> took care of that issue in the info box. I confess to having little interest in student life or athletics, but will integrate those sections once I've gathered some refs for them. Ameriquedialectics 02:13, 4 January 2008 (UTC)[reply]

Oppose—The writing should do justice to both the standards of the institution and WP. Here are random examples, mostly from the lead, of why careful copy-editing is required, preferably by a new collaborator with strategic distance from the text.

  • FYI, UCR links to this article, under "related links," on its Chancellor search website: [1]. I would say the standards of the institution have been satisfied. Ameriquedialectics 09:39, 6 January 2008 (UTC)[reply]
  • "1,200 acres (5 km²)"—hectares, please. Or start with square miles.
 Done Ameriquedialectics 09:39, 6 January 2008 (UTC)[reply]
  • MOS breach and a clumsiness: "extending the citrus growing season in California from 4 months to 9 months"—"from four to nine months".
 Done Ameriquedialectics 09:39, 6 January 2008 (UTC)[reply]
  • OK, word order here is what we call a marked theme; I don't think it needs marking. And collections are equated with the institutions (the second and third items) that house them. "Significant science collections at Riverside include its famous Citrus Variety Collection, Herbarium and one of the largest entomological museums in the United States."
  • I'm not sure what you mean here by "word order" being a "marked theme." (And I'm well aware of the idea of markedness in linguistics.) Also, as should be obvious, the collections are all housed at UCR... unless you mean noting the respective academic departments that administer them, which I think would be too much detail for the lede, I frankly don't know what you are saying. Ameriquedialectics 09:39, 6 January 2008 (UTC)[reply]
Nevermind, I thought you were speaking prescriptively as opposed to descriptively. Fixed the issue with the science collections. Ameriquedialectics 18:24, 6 January 2008 (UTC)[reply]
  • "The campus is currently projected to grow by 6% annually through 2010"—MOS says not to use fluff words such as "currently" (there are others in the lead, too—perhaps "as of 2007"?); the meaning is in "is". "Through" is an Americanism I like, unless it's ambiguous, as it is here (during 2010, or through to 2010?).
 Done I felt "currently" was an appropriate adverb to use with respect to the rankings because they change every year, but i'm not going to argue over it. Ameriquedialectics 09:39, 6 January 2008 (UTC)[reply]
  • Who still puts clunky dots in "PhD"? MOS suggests not to, too.
 Done Ameriquedialectics 09:39, 6 January 2008 (UTC)[reply]
  • "In 1994, the UC campuses began receiving more applications than anticipated." Don't like this. "Since ... received"? Unsure, but do something. Tony (talk) 12:49, 4 January 2008 (UTC)[reply]
  • Do you mean remove instances of passive voice? If so, I'm working on that. Ongoing. Ameriquedialectics 09:39, 6 January 2008 (UTC)[reply]
  • Tony1 suggests the phrasing "Since 1994, the UC campuses received more applications than anticipated" (or similar) instead of "In 1994 ... more applications than anticipated". It has nothing to do with passive voice, and personally I don't think changing "anticipated" from passive to active would be helpful. The only way to do so would be to add superfluous verbiage like "more ... than the university anticipated". szyslak 08:20, 7 January 2008 (UTC)[reply]
The above discussion is preserved as an archive. Please do not modify it. Subsequent comments should be made on the article's talk page or in Wikipedia talk:Featured article candidates. No further edits should be made to this page.
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