User:Deisenbe/sandbox/stmylife

Preliminary

In which the author summarizes basic facts for the reader.

I was born on October 4, 1946, in Astoria, Queens, New York. My father was Louis Eisenberg M.D. and my mother Marcia (née María) Jesiek Eisenberg. I was followed by a brother Joel David, who died of schizophrenia and Chron's disease in his early 30's, my sister Sharon Louise, who is a retired CPA, and my brothers Ronald Allen and Jonathan Lee Eisenberg, who are attorneys. In the summer months we were all separated by two years, such as 16 - 14 - 12 - 10 - 8.

The years of my life

Age at October birthday, year, activity
1 1947 Astoria, Queens
2–16 1948-63 Canisteo, New York
17-18 1963-65 Baltimore, Maryland (Johns Hopkins)
19 1965-66 Madrid (Universidad Complutense de Madrid)
20 1966-67 Baltimore, Maryland (Johns Hopkins)
21-23 1967-1970 Providence, Rhode Island (Brown University)
24-26 1970-73 Chapel Hill, North Carolina (University of North Carolina, now University of North Carolina at Chapel Hill)
27 1973-74 New York, New York (City College of New York)
28-49 1974-1996 Tallahassee, Florida (Florida State University)
50-51 1996-1998 Flagstaff, Arizona (Northern Arizona University)
52-63 1998-2011 Clifton Park, New York (Excelsior College, Edifi)
64-66 2011-2013 nys prisons
67-76 2014-2023 Boca Raton, Florida
77 2023-2024 clinton ny

Before my birth

I was a late baby. One of my parents' stories they liked to tell was how they did not know if I was going to be born on my father's birthday, September 28. When that day went by, they wondered if I would reach my mother's birthday, October 8. Actually I was born on October 4th. This means I was about a week late. A probable result is that I have scoliosis and lordosis, both undiagnosed until I was about 15.

My earliest memories

All of my earliest memories are of things I did wrong, broke, or how I embarrassed my mother.

When my parents moved to Canisteo, while looking for a place to live they stayed temporarily with the daughter of the druggist, Beaver. She had a 78 record changer, the first I had ever seen. When I mentioned this memory to my mother as an adult, her reaction was "You broke it!" I have no memory of this and think it's my mom's memory at fault. But she saw me as a little boy that broke things.

I broke a record when I was maybe 2. This was in the parlor room in Canisteo, first to be a playroom and later my parents' bedroom. They had a 78 record player and one album of records, the Nutcracker Suite. It was on the floor - there was little furniture in that room - and I was on the floor in a child's bouncy chair. I was so excited during the Russian Dance that I was jumping around in my baby's seat on the floor and I broke the record.

I embarassed my mother when I was three, was being recorded on her mother's 78 recorder, and I said I had to use the bathroom.

My parents' secrets

My parents had two secrets which we learned about as adults.

The first is that my mother was converted to Judaism, but by a Reform rabbi. This meant that to my father's Orthodox parents, my father was marrying a Christian. There were financial problems for them as a result.

However, it was never discussed. I don't think anyone in the Jewish congregation in Hornell knew.

The other secret was that my father attended Middlesex Medical School, which was unaccredited, when there were quotas on Jews at most medical schools. I think this weighed on him a lot. He spoke about how the Army had given him anesthesia training, but it didn't count much formally. In 1962 or 63 when he was summoned to appear before the credentials committee at a Hornell hospital, he abruptly left, returned to medical school, did a residency and became board certified in anesthesia.

They didn't socialize with the other doctors. Dad's best friend was Harry Spitulnik, who owned Hornell Waste Materials Co. (He was the synagogue president while dad was vice president.)

The birth of my brother Joel

I was the oldest of 5. The next to be born was my brother Joel, who was born when I was 2. No one asked me if I wanted a brother. I found him to be a threat to me because my parents paid him attention. I did not like having to share my parents' attention.

My parents blamed me for not being a "good brother". Joel as a young adult got schizophrenia and this was blamed on me, though later my mom denied it. Eventually we got taken, when young, on a trip to New York if we would stop fighting. We did stop fighting and we got the trip, and never went back to fighting that much. I did not want him hanging around while I was "working on" my bicycle. I hit him with a wrench and my mom said "You almost killed him" which I knew even then was not true.

The trip to New York

This must have been after the return from Japan, but I'm not sure.

We went to the Empire State Building, then to the Planetarium and Museum of Natural History. We went to a Horn & Hardart automat.

Cape Cod

My father had an office at 22 Greenwood St. in Canisteo. It was not much out of the way going to or from school, but my father did not want me stopping by.

At the time there was a doctors' draft and my father was drafted in 1952. I was 5. We spent the summer on the Cape in two rental houses, one in Mashnee Village. My father did his basic training at Camp Otis. I attended second grade in Bourne, Massachusetts, for two weeks. Mom had the school bus driver stop specially for me to avoid fights sith the other kids. Then my father went to Korea and we went back to Canisteo.

The trip to Japan

My parents decided that we would join my dad in Sendai, Japan, where he was to spend the second of his two years, at a hospital in the rear. I went with mom to closest travel agent, who was in Wellsville, New York. We flew from New York to Los Angeles, where we were met by a travel agent - I think the original agent had sent out letters. Fron there we boarded the SS President Wilson to Kobe, Japan, with a stop in Honolulu, where another travel agent took us to a toy store and mom bought a Monopoly (game) set, since I could never use the one on the boat. I thought the boat was fascinating. It had an elevator, the first I'd ever seen, and in an office a Friden calculator.

While in Japan I attended third grade at a U.S. Army school at Camp Sendai. We had stayed at Camp Schimmelpfennig while they looked for housing. My parents had a house with hot water and a flush toilet. They had three servants: a cook, a maid, and a houseboy. They were very cheap. We went to Nikkō. They had us stay with someone while they went to Tokyo for a week. Mom taught English "at the university". She took a class in Japanese miniature tree (bonsai) arranging. I was already taking piano at home and they arranged a lesson and practice time for me.

The house in Canisteo

I didn't realize it at the time, but the house in Canisteo was rather basic, there were originally two bedrooms, plus one bath, on the second floor. My earliest memories are of being in bedroom no. 2 and Joel in a crib. I wrote my name on the heeadboard, to my mom's disgust.

When we can back from Japan that became Sharon's room and Joel and I moved into room made out of unfinished attic. It started out as a clown motif - it started with a clown nose light switch. I and Joel shared the room, not too comfortably. It was about then that the back porch was removed and replaced by a patio.

The fourth child, Ronald, was born just before Japan. When he was followed by Jonathsn - again, no one asked my opinion on having more brothers — the two of them took over the bedroom Joel and I were in, we moved into what had been my parents' room, and they moved to a new bedroom made out of the parlor on the first floor.

My parents had a Cocker spaniel named Dutchess, who lived on the back porch and was killed by a car. Before Japan.

Thry once let me have a rabbit, who I tamed. He also lived on the enclosed back porch. But they gave the rabbit back to Mr. Henry because they said i didn't keep it clean enough. I was very unhappy and felt I hadn't been instructed about what to do.

School

School was never difficult or problematical. I was the narrator of "Make Way for Ducklings" in second grade. I got along ok with the teachers.

I went to preschool at the Cotton's house. Skipping kindergarden. My parents had me down as very smart when I was four. I don't remember ever being unable to read. I was fascinated by small machines.

They thought it would benefit me to skip kindergarten and start right in first grade. The school board asked for a psychologist's report, so they got one. As a result, I started first grade when I was 4. Again, no one asked me or even discussed it. The problem was that I was the youngest one in the class and my special status didn't make me any friends. I found myself behind the other kids socially and athletically, although intellectually I was fine.

Buying new car 2024

While going to chorus rehearsal, I had accident that totaled the car. I had a 50 mg gummy that may have been a factor. Hid a utility pole. Could not find the place afterwards.

The whole was relatively simple. I got a Camry as a rental. I went by the dealer and found a 2024 Corolla hybrid that would do and bought it.

Judy has upset stomach and is missing her Spanish lesson. She did go to violin yesterday, but did not play. Got her new chin rest.

At Canisteo Central School

All my schooling in Canisteo was at the school that was the only school building when I was young, Canisteo Central School. I don't see how the teachers could have not known I'd "skipped a grade", as it was put. Throughout school I got along well with the teachers, I got good marks.

When I was in high school I went out for swimming my freshman year, but fell, cut a gash in my knee, and that was it for organized swimming. My mother got on my case about not bring "well rounded", so I took up the basketball scoreboard two years, and the baseball score/record book my senior year. These got me an Athletic letter, and satisfied my mom. There was one incident when I let the clock run out two seconds on a close game. Coach first blamed loss on me, then apologized.

Friends

My friend when young was Ronnie Moss. Contacted him about 2000. He moved away. Tom Hopkins was my friend, he went to Panama with me and was in Aguadulce. I got him to jack off with me. He was the next youngest. I was of course the youngest in every class.

I tended to play by myself. My parents bought, for me or "the family", a bunch of scientific toys, a cheap telescope, a printing press that printed post card size, a 3 tube radio set. First the Morse code buzzer set. He had a tape recorder which he and my mom used to exchange mail when dad was in Korea.

When I was 10 I got a beagle-Spaniel puppy. I named him Spotty. He was a good friend.

We all had bicycles. I rode mine everywhere. I picked up stamps from businesses, soaked and sorted them, and used them to buy new stamps for my collection.

Cub Scouts and 4-H

I was joined to Cub Scouts, but I did not like the Scoutmaster Mr. Heaslip and didn't continue with the Boy Scouts. Under pressure to do something, I joined 4-H, an agricultural program

We had a horse, Dancer. He was a buddy. My parents would take me to county horse shows to compete, and twice to state shows. My dad had to get someone to move the horse.

The trailers

My parents wanted to travel, but five kids made it expensive. We did goxsee Niagara Falls and stayed in acmotel. But after that there were trailers, a Fan, a Shasta.

We went on a trip to Lake George and Fort Ticonderoga, and another to Gettysburg, Washington D.C., and Williamsburg, Virginia. The summer after my freshman year, 1964, we went on a trailer trip to Mexico. Mom was getting rather depressed and dad had a stick to beat over the back of the front seat anyone he could reach... This was the last big trip.

My mother's family

My mother's family lived in Michigan. I saw them first when I was 3 and we were there for my mom's sister's wedding. Uncle Chuck took me to the trainyard he worked at. Grandmother Jesiek, with whom I made the recording referred to above, had matches printed "Stolen from Clara Jesiek" and a wall piece "how to live to be 100," and if you lifted the paper to look at the answer, it said "get to 99 and then be very careful".

Masturbation upset my mother greatly

I started when I was 14. No one taught me anything. I was the older brother. I was threatening and they took me to a psychiatrist because I was allegedly mentally ill. The psychiatrist was helpful. They threatened to send me to Valley Forge Military Academy for my senior year, but I persuaded them not to. The psychiatrist was the one who suggested I apply to Hopkins, Princeton, and Harvard. Hopkins accepted me.

I used to stimulate my penis by putting warm washcloths on it. I remember my first orgasm, which happened unexpectedly. I never even tried to stop, despite my mother, just was more discreet. I think I would urinatevin my underwear at night and then had to wash it out while everyone slept.

Moving away

My family moved to Fayetteville, New York, in 1963, the year I finished hgih school, so I lost contact with my former class.

Doing my dad's billing

I was fascinated by machines and my dad's typewriter was one. He bought a typing book and key caps, which made me memorize the keys. I did his billing and his insurance claims. He paid me $8/week, which he was very happy to be able to take off his income tax.

WLEA

By last year in high school, I got my first job that wasn't working for my father: cataloguing records and announcing on WLEA, a Mutual radio station in Hornell, N,Y. My father approved of me earning money. Not a real great job, congressman Charlie Henderson owned it, got cut back to one day only at the end. i did the church remotes on Sunday morn8ngs.

Baltimore and Johns Hopkins

I was glad to get away from home and although I won a scholakrship to Syracuse University there was no peessure for me to take it, I think they wanted me away too, and Johns Hopkins was a better school.

Baltimore had nudist bookstores and the Gayety Theater, which gave strip shows, and I could go as soon as I turned 18. I also shoplifted erotic books as a sophomore. I got in trouble selling alcohol, and I worked on the campus radio station my freshman year, made friends with Rainer van Saleski. My freshman year I tried building an electrostatic speaker system out of a magazine article. It never worked. Had to have 100 henry chokes specially manufactured. A choke is an electric part. 100 henries was the strength.

At Hopkins you could take graduate courses freely, and I took Chaucer and English romantic poetry my sophomore year, thinking I would be an English major. It was the first real exposure I had to literature. But as it ended up, I wanted to spend a year in Europe, and had no interest in England. So I went to Spain and came back as a Spanish major. I had only one year Latin; they waived the 2nd year requirement.

Generally I wasn't happy at Hopkins. It was all male at the undergraduate level. Fraternities were strong but I was not a figure to interest them. The students tended to be pre-med and science types; while Hopkins had good humanities programs, that was not at the undergraduate level. My senior year I took almost exclusively graduate courses. Francisco Rico, who would be very famous in the future, was visiting professor. He did two semesters on the picaresque, had just edited Guzmán de Alfarache. So I got to graduate school with a leg up.

I was interested in languages and tried teaching myself Portuguese and Catalan/Provenzal.

I tried going to some mixers and dating with Goucher and Union Memorial Hospital girls. linda Bell? My firet girlfriend ever, sophomore year I ended it at the end of the year and felt guilty about it.

The car in Spain

One thing my parents did that was very nice was my father, wanting a new Volkswagen, bought one for me to pick up in Paris. (The boat was a passenger liner for students and let us off at Le Havre.) I drove it to Spain with three riders, then I was able to drive it all over Spain and at Xmas to Morocco. The summer afterwords I picked up my new friend John Gledson in Coimbra and we drove to Cairo along the North African coast, a trip no longer possible. I took a Norwegian freighter from Port Said to Halifax, Canada. At Christmas trip I started with Linda Jimenez in other front seat, then John Gledson took her place.

Studying at the University of Madrid

At that time Johns Hopkins had no foreign study programs. i did all the paperwork to get advance approval that my courses at the University of Madrid I would take in their Program for Foreigners. The version of Spain I got was very Catholic, very pro-Franco, nothing on the 20th century, Spain the conquerer over the Arabs.

I did try to see if I could date anyone in Madrid and had a little success with Linda Jimenez from the NYU program, but nothing enduring.

Go to graduate school

At the end of my senior year I wondered if my education could help me get a job, and I did some investigating, but the advice from everyone, certainly from Hopkins, was "go to graduate school." So that's what I did. I didn't know this, but I was preparing myself for a professor's career.

Fred Strebe introduces me to Lynn Rimmer

My senior year at Hopkins, there was one other undergraduate Spanish major, Fred Strebe. I hot invited to his house I think twice, and he introduced me to Lynn, who was then a senior in his high school. Her parents were difficult to get on with. I tried having sex with Lynn but could not figure out how.

Providence R.I. and Brown

On the advice of my Hopkins professors, especially Elias Rivers, I applied to Harvard, Brown, and Duke. Brown accepted me.

Brown's Spanish department had a personality and a politics. MI had Unamuno fron López-Morillas my first year, a great experience. I regretted not being there when he offered his courses on the Institución Libre de Enseñanza. I had Tirso from Trueblood and Mexican Novel from Amor. Pierce was visiting professor and had Spanish epic. I did sp many independent studies that someone in my job applications noticed. Kossoff was on sabbatical my first year. My second year I had anoher course on the picaresque, from him, plus course with two students on editing texts. Steve Sheible the other. Gary Stevens.

I had three year NDEA support. My first year I think I had a one-year leftover from somebody but they ended up giving me three years. There were six or eight that started when I did and only two that finished.

I had to get special permission to take graduate exams my second year before courses were over. I got a "neat" pass. There were no summer classes so I used the time to read the works on the reading list. My third year of support was free to do the thesis, which I chose completely on my own, an edition of a romance of chivalry.

This was the last year before the MLA Job List, and I had to send out 80+ letters looking for vacancies. I had a problem with UNC versus Urdue. Accepted Purdue then turned it down when UNC belatedly came through. Purdue told UNC, I had let them know. I hardly knew what I was doing. I had had no teaching experience save some adult ed courses.

UNC and Chapel Hill

Chapel Hill was basically a disaster. i was non-renewed after my three year appointment. I got given History of Spanish Language to teach by Avalle-Arce. He was a funny fellow, I don't remember what I taught. Avalle pretended to be a bigger friend than he was. His two boys in trouble with law, had sex with one of them, Avalle so far as I knew never found out. Lived 11 miles in the country, on Wildcat Creek Road. Split up with Lynn, rented house on Woodland Avenue, went to gay bar for first time . First time except for Tom Hopkins and John Gledson that I had sex with a guy. But I found the gay community rather immature, the visible part of it, at least. Started dating Irene at the very end. Nancy Giguere.

The department was divided between the local boys -Stoudemire - and the outsiders. Friendship with the Ebersoles. Fred Clark. Had been exodus to u. Kentucky.

Went to City College with $4,500 raise.

City College and Manhattan

I lived on W. 109th St. between Broadway and Riverside. I walked to work. Union helped me, Rada Milantyevic, Was to be laid off but grievance gave me another year. In the meantime had applied for everything and accepted FSU post with raise in rank.

I enjoyed living in Manhattan. My Clásicos Castellanos ed came out then. I started working on Lorca and was surprised to find that tgere was work to be done - no one had looked through the local papers for the time of his visit. I did Chronology.

Florida State and Tallahassee

Florida State was where I got tenure, after 3-4 years. Bill Cooke - left without saying goodbye. I decided to avenge myself on UNC - and the Ebersole's Hispanófila - by starting a journal, which I ran for 16 years. Did department newsletter first. First 3 years by Soler. Phil Martin, FSU's one-man press, helped me. He ended up separating himself, I turned him down for sex once.

According to Alicia Monguió, FSU was to be the peak of my career. I got distinguished research professor, but offended because that got a bonus while distinguished teaching professors got raises. Elaine Cancalon. Mark Pietralunga. David Darst. Bill Cloonan. Ernie Rehder. Louis Bourgeois. Jim Wyatt Head of UFF, turned it down first year because didn't yet have tenure. Ken Megill. I felt union had helped me in City College and I would work some for union.

Never served in faculty senate. No doctoral students except one that Darst took over. Can't remember name. Chris Sliva From Poland. I had to outline his m.a. thesis very closely, he would draw wrong conclusions with great comfort. He was my disciple, I had trained him.

One problem with FSU was that it was in the middle of nowhere. Not near anything. Nothing in the summeer. 1507 Sharon Road.

By 1992 my hands had gotten irritated, I had severe tendonitis. Jorge Román-Lagunas taking over JHP, me refunding subscribers' money. Jorge mysteriously turning into enemy, I never understood it.

The last year there I was head of Spanish.

I returned to FSU on trip to Georgia I think for niece's wedding. Bill Clamurro treated me like king. Didn't understand woh Rehder was head of Spanish all these years.

I didn't feel there was a need for the Spanish Ph.D.'s we were producing.

Leaving FSU

Tallahassee was very isolated and not too prestigious. I was trying to get away for many years. Finally Ellen observed that while I thought the relocatable journal was helping me, in fact it made me unhirable. So I stopped it, and Jorge Román-Lagunas ridiculously took it over. I got an interview at the University of Evansville. Got an interview with trip to New Zealand at U. of Auckland. When I got turned down for Ruth El Saffar's position, I realized no offer would ever come. So I went instead into academic administration. I got a position as dept. chair, with cut in rank, at Northern Arizona University.

Northern Arizona U. and Flagstaff

I left for Flagstaff as chair and took break in rank to Associate Prof. Severely disfunctional dept, all full profs in German. One Assoc Prof in Spanish. Had an MAT. I lasted until Thanksgivingifrlt that time hose over me and thoseunder moe wanted different things. The dean, Suzanne Shipley, didn't back me up as she had said she would. I was going to ne moved to Humanities Dept. when I got job at Excelsior. There was no way to do mright, those above me and those below me wanted different things. I used the training there in distance ed. to helo mevin getting thevjob at Excelsior. We had a very nice house built, it went up in value after I left more than any other house. One professor classics - Hopi. I went once to NAU - Yuma. Had to go to .phoenix fot R any serious shopping.

The trip to Spain 2014

This was a strange trip, my first since 2005. No one at all to see in Spaain, only the crazy guy in La Coruña. Went to Porto, wanted to see Portugal's drug scene, from there to La Coruña, Gijón, two nights in Santo Domingo de Silos, then Barcelona. Got my nipples pierced there. Missed visiting thr Bsgdad. Judy had one English channel in hotel.

The Move to New York

After Judy's parents died—her father died in 2022—we had little to hold us in south Florida, and we decided to move back to upstate New York. After all the work I had done on the Oneida Institute, I felt familiar with that area. Clinton is a college town and is well spoken of. We flew to see it, to look at a house from 1900, which we bought. It is across the street from the library and one can walk anywhere. I bought a big new TV instead of using one of the old ones. This worked very well.

Judy took up violin lessons through Hamilton, ending things with the guy in Macedonia. I practiced piano during one of her lessons.

The first winter was hard. I didn't expect the cold to be so intense. I did volunteering at the libraries on Monday until the position was cut. I joined the barbershop chorus. Lots to do around the house and wondering if I do things right. Get hot water in 2 working. Most of my clothes in 2.

Susancaetovisit three times, at $1000 each time. More money than we can spend. Have dog walked at $20 per walk. One cleaner is $250 each time, other one $35. $180/week Austin.

Not sure how guilty to feel re car accident. A 50 mg gummy. Weather a factor.

March 2, 2024

Today I had three things to do in one day, and I felt that the depression was lifting. Thue first was the Yoga class. The sexond was a potluck of SAGE (Senior Action in a Gay Environment) The third was to have been going to the historical society to work on history of the house, but I didn't get there.

The meeting of SAGE turned out to be a potluck. People were aggressively friendly. Met a retired Presbyterian minister, who knew Steve Best. The rabbi from the schul on the corner was there, as were people with very different careers. It was a very diverse group, half male half female. I asked that we go around and every ody introduce themselves.

I feel the depression is lifting, not because of Zoloft but because of the end of winter, more sunshine, things to do.

Going on a cruise

We had so much money that I thought would try this, did Cape Cod islands, Block Island, M,artha's Vineyard, Nantucket. Got a $499 or $609 discount. To go in July.

In 2024 I had three therapists. Terminated one.

My four wives

Wife number one was Lynn Rimmer. Married hier in 1968 after her parents'opposition, split up in 1972. Shee has finished one year at U Md, did two years ar Rhode Island College, finished at Chapel Hill. At the time I hought we split up because Io was gay, but now I think that was how I dealt with my guilt. She played flute and studied music. Had been a summer at Tanglewood before I met her. Neve rknew if was a virgin.

Wife number two was Irene Ferreira de Sousa, Brazilian, met in Chapel Hill where she went to study. Problems with her doing nothing. She got master's by indexing Portuguese articles in Hispania. We . Went to Brazil three times, first when we got married. At loose ends in Tallahassee, didn't have a career or things to do. We split up once when she went back to Brazil without me and I went to Brazil and got her to copme back again, which lasted a year and some months. She had a brace mon one leg d lost time in school because of her leg situation.

Third with was Ellen Burns. She wouldn't use my name. I met her at the reference desk in Strozier Library. Married her in 1976 and we split up with my legal problems about 2004. She had made changes in her career. Started out in instrumental music (clarinet), then librarian, hen wanted a Ph.D. and to be a professor.

Fourth was was Judy Reichenthal, only one enthusiastic to take my name. Met in 2007 through Jewish singles group. She divorced me when I went back to prison early in 2013. When I got out late in 2013, she invited me to visit. I was going to Montana to my sister's, was going to investigate the northwest. Tom Lathrop told me I had to accept her invitation so I did and she greeted me and we never split up since. She had a lot of mental health problems, had schizoaffective disorder. She had been in remission 10 years when I met her. In 2018 had breakdown, four admissions one with auicide attempt by pills. Two admissions in 2021. I got her linked up with psychiatric nurse practitioner to stabilize medicines. Gained weight so was on Ozemdpic, horrible nausea.

Irene and Judy were always ready for sex. Ellen felt that to go to see a marriage counselor was pointless as it would be a way for me to push for sex.

Me being gay

I first concluded that I was gay in Chapel Hill, went to Pegasus bar/club. Found those people not very responsible, married Irene. I went to bay bathhouses in Charlotte, Wash DC. Ny. Came to conclusion was bisexual or pansexual.

New Hyork State pridons

• First session, late 2010-late 2012
  • Downstate (closed)
  • Fishkill
  • Arthur Kill (closed) judy visited every week
  • Marcy - visited every two weeks
  • One near Buffalo Lathrop visited

• second session, 2013
  • Downstate (Closed)
  • Mt. McGregor (closed) Tom Lathrop only visit
  • Marcy